As Doc says there's a wide spectrum.
I wonder If it sometimes depends on expectations.
I have a regular Thai masseuse, who as well as providing one of my favourite warm oil, sensual relaxing massages, is an expert in incorporating an occasional deft touch of the ol' fella whilst massaging my legs.
It almost feels as if it's accidental as it's so soft, but in fact it's a well practiced technique.
it encourages an extremely pleasant sensation and I think the medical term is a 'lob on'.
The combination of the said lob on, soft relaxing massage and background music is enough to induce a trance like feeling, almost on the edge of sleep. (In fact I've almost dropped off (ie:- to sleep &/or the bench, causing a sudden jerk which has frightened the shit out of her).
We both know there's no HR, so my expectations are clear and I'm going for that experience (& saving money).
Then there's the excitement of the WSWS TOFTT experience.
Again if I'm going to a BDSM provider who's made it clear there's no HE, then that's what I'm expecting, so I'll accept my fate.
Where I may get frustrated is when reviews have led to expect a fbsm Inc HE, and the lady just stops abruptly.
A well reviewed Thai masseuse opened a shop in Wales and had a habit of doing just that.
She would do everything to make you think a HE was to be the culmination of lots of direct stimulation, and then just leave the room.
Some punters reported just finishing themselves off, and yet others recorded HJ were available.
Again, all to do with expectations.
Obviously this is where a regular can be so useful, where both parties know what's expected and the experience optimised through practice.
On the subject of edging, I've found it quite rare to find SPs who can really offer a true lengthy edging experience.
Locally the diminutive Lucy Czech in Chester isn't bad, and the legendary Anfield sisters are popular.
Some BDSM providers have been worthwhile but mixing pain with pleasure is more my thing.
The only lady who genuinely could keep me on the edge for up to 2 hours, was the lovely Devil at Tantric Healing in Wirral ( long retired)
Through her 'tantric' techniques she taught me how mixing just the right level of pain with pleasure can really enhance the experience and subsequent orgasm.
Devi had the full range of accessories, but she was no BDSM mistress. She didn't need to use excessive pain or leave marks.
Sessions were sometimes enhanced with sensory deprivation of sight and soundso you didn't know what to expect next.
All the time she made sure your erection was maintained.
I can still remember the orgasms resulting from her HJ technique whilst using a wartenberg wheel playing over my nipples or bollocks.
And that was about 30 years ago.
I've even got a bit of a lob on writing that.
