Author Topic: Seeking.com (London)  (Read 2035878 times)

Offline Graphics789

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Regardless of how often you use Seeking you are still expected to contribute to the site in general.

What reason do you have for being a condescending and judgemental twat with an attitude that most would class as totally unacceptable on here?   :unknown:

Your last review was July 2022, mine was March 2023 and you have to resort to name calling; if reviews are only way we are "expected to contribute to the site in general", then I guess we are both falling short of what is expected of us.

If you put your emotions aside, read all my posts, you know I do not judge anyone, just highlighting the obvious truth some people may or may not accept.

We are all men, we should handle our responsibilities as men and be accountable for our actions (blackmailing is illegal and it should not be happening, but he has to accept he put himself in that position and deep down he truly knows what he has to do to avoid being in a situation like this ever again).

This is my last post on this matter; we just have to agree to disagree, end of.
Banned reason: condescending and judgemental twat. Repeatedly questioning mod's contributions.
Banned by: daviemac

Offline daviemac

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- Read above and people privately message about stuff I guess they do not want others to know or broadcast, I just answer their questions and/or provide advise as it is clear I am an avid user of Seeking (but I will punt soon just to have an update to review for others to read as they see fit).
I've just notice you edited my post in you reply instead of just quoting it and posting your reply.

Quote
I am not judging anyone for being on a paid sex site, just highlighting his irresponsibility (if his wife knew he was on Seeking or AW, I wouldn't have commented the way I did and most likely he wouldn't have the concerns he currently has now).
Just on New Years Day I provided a post for punters in relation to Seeking and I am sure others (who commented about it) benefited from that post. Mind you, your last review was in 2022.

Care to explain what you think the highlighted part has to do with you or anyone else? :unknown:

Are you totally stupid, have you not noticed the word moderator under my name.   :wacko:

The only thing I have to decide now is how long to ban you for, 14 days, 60 days or permanent.
« Last Edit: January 14, 2024, 12:26:17 am by daviemac »

Offline Graphics789

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I've just notice you edited my post in you reply instead of just quoting it and posting your reply.

Care to explain what you think the highlighted part has to do with you or anyone else? :unknown:

Are you totally stupid, have you not noticed the word moderator under my name.   :wacko:

The only thing I have to decide now is how long to ban you for, 14 days, 60 days or permanent.

That was an error on my part; I was trying to address each of your points individually and it came out differently as to how I expected it to be.

Calling me twat, stupid; you just resort to name calling and now abusing your power by banning me and even suggesting to banning me permanently which some (I would hope) would say is excessive.

I have not broken any site rules or violated any policies; have not named called, used profanities (just had an unpopular opinion, which may I add others have agreed to).

23 Abuse towards other members
Discord must be kept civil. Excessive abuse/swearing is not acceptable. "You're acting like a twat" is not excessive. However, "you're a fucking inbred cunt" is excessive and is not acceptable. Bullying will result in a ban. Abuse of the Mod or Admin Team will result in a ban


You've called me a twat and insinuated if I am stupid; I have not, in any of my posts, insulted you or anyone for that matter.

I will not feel intimated or bullied by your threats of a ban; if it leads to a permanent ban, I have clean conscience I did not violate any site rules.
Banned reason: condescending and judgemental twat. Repeatedly questioning mod's contributions.
Banned by: daviemac

Offline daviemac

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That was an error on my part; I was trying to address each of your points individually and it came out differently as to how I expected it to be.

Calling me twat, stupid; you just resort to name calling and now abusing your power by banning me and even suggesting to banning me permanently which some (I would hope) would say is excessive.

I have not broken any site rules or violated any policies; have not named called, used profanities (just had an unpopular opinion, which may I add others have agreed to).

23 Abuse towards other members
Discord must be kept civil. Excessive abuse/swearing is not acceptable. "You're acting like a twat" is not excessive. However, "you're a fucking inbred cunt" is excessive and is not acceptable. Bullying will result in a ban. Abuse of the Mod or Admin Team will result in a ban


You've called me a twat and insinuated if I am stupid; I have not, in any of my posts, insulted you or anyone for that matter.

I will not feel intimated or bullied by your threats of a ban; if it leads to a permanent ban, I have clean conscience I did not violate any site rules.
What right have you got to question my review count. See the highlighted part.

By your own quote of the rules calling you a twat is well within them and questioning a moderators contributions to the site is regarded by most members to be one of the stupedest thing to do as it leads to a ban.

Offline MrMakers

I guess my post triggered you too, which lead you to resort to name calling.

I am sure no one (man or woman) would like it if their partner was cheating on them; it doesn't take much/cost much to be a decent human being (I am not judging him, just simply pointing out his wrongdoings and if he were to get blackmailed, he should not be upset by the blackmailer's actions, more his own deceitfulness that has put him in such a situation).

Most of my posts upset people like you because you cannot handle or accept the truth; I use UKP as much as the next person and also ensure to provide value (which I recently have, both publicly and via the DMs I receive) and if someone posts something I disagree with, I am not scared to comment on it, especially if it goes against what the herd would agree on (if you do not want someone to provide a contrarian view to your posts, then you should not post them; I welcome both positive or negative responses to anything I post).

It is a shame people on here do not encourage others to take responsibility for their actions, coming to the realisation that you play a part in every situation or experience and, therefore, have some degree of responsibility over the outcomes or consequences (in this case being deceitful that opens you up to blackmailing).

So, so much wrong with this.  I'll keep it brief as you may not ever see it and probably wouldn't comprehend it anyways as your head is currently so far up your own ass you are taking mods to task for their last review times (whether you were just dumb or oblivious it's amazing either way).

1 - go look up what 'false equivalence ' means

2 - just because someone uses naughty words doesn't mean they are 'triggered', it's just an observation easily backed up by a cursory look through your post history.  Right before this you claim someones list is 'dog shit ', but a few posts below you literally just post a bunch of links with quoted prices, but then say you haven't met all of them BUT GIVE NO INDICATION WHICH ONES YOU DID.  That makes your post borderline useless and the one you were having a go at unequivocally more useful.

3 - for a truth teller you seem to make s lot of assumptions.  I've had open relationships where it certainly would be okay to engage in shenanigans, but sounds become a problem when my partners social media contacts got involved.  See where I'm going with this?

Offline Graphics789

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What right have you got to question my review count. See the highlighted part.

By your own quote of the rules calling you a twat is well within them and questioning a moderators contributions to the site is regarded by most members to be one of the stupedest thing to do as it leads to a ban.

You brought up my last review and the date that it was - I never mentioned anything about reviews until you did.

You then mentioned it again saying you have to contribute to this site (insinuating the only way to contribute is through reviews).

If reviews are only way to contribute to this site, then we've both fallen short of what is expected.

In my opinion there are more ways other than reviews to contribute to this site (although I agree March 2023 is a long time and I was planning to give another punting review).

But like I stated, my post on New Years Day helped others on the site and the subsequent comments (and the DMs I received) that followed it shows others benefitted from it (I would argue that is contributing to the site by providing useful information to other members of this site).
Banned reason: condescending and judgemental twat. Repeatedly questioning mod's contributions.
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Offline daviemac

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You brought up my last review and the date that it was - I never mentioned anything about reviews until you did.

You then mentioned it again saying you have to contribute to this site (insinuating the only way to contribute is through reviews).

If reviews are only way to contribute to this site, then we've both fallen short of what is expected.

In my opinion there are more ways other than reviews to contribute to this site (although I agree March 2023 is a long time and I was planning to give another punting review).

But like I stated, my post on New Years Day helped others on the site and the subsequent comments (and the DMs I received) that followed it shows others benefitted from it (I would argue that is contributing to the site by providing useful information to other members of this site).
I mentioned your review because it's part of a moderators job to question the contributions of members and decide what action to take against them if their contributions fall below what is required, putting up with what you are continually posting about me falling short with contributions is not part of being a mod.

You can argue all you want but as you like to quote the rules I'll quote some to you.

1 Site ethos/mission
This Forum puts the interests of Punters first through the sharing of Reviews. The Forum does not endorse or promote any service provider or any other site. This site is totally independent. No favouritism, no special treatment, no vested interests and no pandering to service providers. Members are expected to post Reviews, although there is no formal quota (see rule 27). General chat relating to Punting is allowed on the appropriate Board.

27 Lurking / Dormant Accounts
Members that do not contribute Reviews or where their accounts become dormant may have their membership revoked.
« Last Edit: January 14, 2024, 01:06:12 am by daviemac »

Offline MrMakers

If reviews are only way to contribute to this site, then we've both fallen short of what is expected.

 :dash:

Offline Graphics789

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I mentioned your review because it's part of a moderators job to question the contributions of members and decide what action to take against them if their contributions fall below what is required, putting up with what you are continually posting about me falling short with contributions is not part of being a mod.

You can argue all you want but as you like to quote the rules I'll quote some to you.

1 Site ethos/mission
This Forum puts the interests of Punters first through the sharing of Reviews. The Forum does not endorse or promote any service provider or any other site. This site is totally independent. No favouritism, no special treatment, no vested interests and no pandering to service providers. Members are expected to post Reviews, although there is no formal quota (see rule 27). General chat relating to Punting is allowed on the appropriate Board.

27 Lurking / Dormant Accounts
Members that do not contribute Reviews or where their accounts become dormant may have their membership revoked.

This is my first time interacting with you so saying "putting up with what you are continually posting about me falling short with contributions is not part of being a mod" is excessive as I only mentioned it based on the fact you stated your last review was nearly a year ago.

As it states in that rule there is 'no formal quota' and I do not think there are set rules on how frequent reviews should be posted (although I agree March 2023 is a long time).

I have already stated I will be posting a review soon (most likely in February as I have a 'dry January' where I go celibate for a month - something I've highlighted in one of my previous posts, in case you think I am making this up).
« Last Edit: January 14, 2024, 01:40:53 am by Graphics789 »
Banned reason: condescending and judgemental twat. Repeatedly questioning mod's contributions.
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Offline daviemac

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This is my first time interacting with you so saying "putting up with what you are continually posting about me falling short with contributions is not part of being a mod" is excessive as I only mentioned it based on the fact you stated your last review was nearly a year ago.

As it states in that rule there is 'no formal quota' and I do not think there is a set rules on how frequent reviews should be posted (although I agree March 2023 is a long time).

I have already stated I will be posting a review soon (most likely in February as I have a 'dry January' where I go celibate for a month - something I've highlighted in my previous post in case you think I am making this up).
You've mentioned my reviews several time on this thread and despite me giving you every chance to accept the rules you still continue so you have left me no choice.

Offline jamal2k94


Offline tazz

Anyone met Babycakes26, based south london a nurse, seems to be online every day, had exchanges messages last year but got into another arrangement

External Link/Members Only

Offline flamingice

She got in touch with me as well recently after some abortive negotiations in the past. Must be going through her phone book lol

Been messaging me too.  Keeps suggesting I call her an Uberr once I migrated her to WhatsApp.  I asked her for a face pic and I’m not inclined to proceed.  She didn’t get round to quoting a £, which is even more unsettling.

Anyone been with or spoken to
External Link/Members Only

Just my type.  Korean cutie.  Claims to have only been with one arrangement which is total BS as she has been on the site since 2020.  Said she wasn’t into PPMs but if she is it’s $2k!!!  Literally fell off my chair but moved her to WhatsApp to find out more.  If I could get a whole night of action then maybe it’s just about doable with a bit of downward negotiation first.  All went downhill when found out she’s away at uni, doesn’t want to video call, seemed a bit cagey around a first meet including sex.  Eventually dropped it as was not getting good vibes and felt she was more interested in me paying her rail fare back to London so she could go hang out with her friends for the weekend.  Now she blocked me.

Question - I’m first time subscriber and going more with the line that I’m looking for a longer term thing.  This seems quite difficult as feels like most (all) the girls on there really are just PPMs.  The tricky part is if you are putting yourself out as a long term guy, it’s quite difficult to then back row and start suggesting that you’re up for a PPM?  Question is how do others do it.  I am really after a long term, as PPM is easier done on escort sites.  Any advice would be appreciated.  Perhaps better to just start with PPM and migrate to a longer term if the PPM is good?  Suggesting longer term from the outset I feel the girls might try and bluff that they are after that, but reality is they just want the cash and more happy just going straight for a PPM without the song and dance?

Offline bortas2k8

I’m very clear that I’m looking to find someone for a long-term arrangement, but that we should take it step by step first. That then seems to give me plenty of flexibility to adapt to wherever they then take the convo…

Offline flamingice

I’m very clear that I’m looking to find someone for a long-term arrangement, but that we should take it step by step first. That then seems to give me plenty of flexibility to adapt to wherever they then take the convo…

Thanks.  This is exactly the approach I have taken, but how do you prevent the following from happening:

1. Girl agrees she’s also looking for long term (and makes point that all the other guys are just wanting PPM and a one night stand)
2. We then agree let’s take it slow, BUT girl says she doesn’t expect sex in first meet
3. 2 is fine, but then also says for the trouble of time and travelling, wants first couple of meets to be PPM

Now I’m in a situation where they expect me to pay, AND not get sex.  Worst of both worlds.  Difficult to now turn round and say, “you know what, I’m happy to do a PPM but we going to need to have sex”.

Offline DeanoDeano

If you’re looking for something long term and happy to play that long game, then say you’re happy to do platonic dates to get to know her, but any form of mutually beneficial arrangement will only start when she’s comfortable getting intimate with you. And that for both of your safety while trust is being built up, it’s best to take things one date at a time, as said above.

Offline bortas2k8

Thanks.  This is exactly the approach I have taken, but how do you prevent the following from happening:

1. Girl agrees she’s also looking for long term (and makes point that all the other guys are just wanting PPM and a one night stand)
2. We then agree let’s take it slow, BUT girl says she doesn’t expect sex in first meet
3. 2 is fine, but then also says for the trouble of time and travelling, wants first couple of meets to be PPM

Now I’m in a situation where they expect me to pay, AND not get sex.  Worst of both worlds.  Difficult to now turn round and say, “you know what, I’m happy to do a PPM but we going to need to have sex”.

Every convo is unique so I can’t generalise how to avoid the scenario above.

But first and foremost I never ever do compensated M&G; I’ll be polite but very  firm about that - if I really like them I’ll up a bit the game on where I propose to take them out for that first drink (to signal a higher value investment). But I just firmly push back and if they drop out then so what, clearly not for me and there’s plenty more fish in the sea. Some change their mind also after a while.

If it comes up, I also set the expectation that a second meet should include intimacy (“otherwise aren’t we both wasting our time?”) - and be rewarded of course with a gift - as we build up to a longer term arrangement. Maybe it’s just me but I stay away from terms like ppm. I would probably have asked them early on what they look for on their side in an arrangement and that helps then guide the way I describe the assistance I’d provide (eg a contribution towards their tuition / bills etc).

Offline bortas2k8

If you’re looking for something long term and happy to play that long game, then say you’re happy to do platonic dates to get to know her, but any form of mutually beneficial arrangement will only start when she’s comfortable getting intimate with you. And that for both of your safety while trust is being built up, it’s best to take things one date at a time, as said above.

This! Better said than my post just now 😂

Offline flamingice

This! Better said than my post just now 😂

Thanks all.  To be clear, compensated M&Gs is absolutely a no no.  I think this one just wasn’t a good match.  Not very interested in getting to know me, other than being compensated, and did not even want a voice or video call, which you could view as a pre-meet M&G, even when I pointed out it was just as much to make her feel more comfortable that who she is speaking to is real.

Offline DeanoDeano

Some simple maths will help you here too btw.

£2k a month will end up being a hell of a lot more than that, once you factor in costs of meals, drinks, hotels, particularly if she (like most genuine sugar babies) wants the lifestyle shift as well as the cash in her bank account. You’re probably looking at 50% on top of the allowance, and given that standard expectations would be for 3 meets a month (given the one week a month she’ll be “out of action” ) you’ll be pushing the best part of a grand per meet.

Might be affordable but worth considering anyway…

Offline stampjones

Thanks all.  To be clear, compensated M&Gs is absolutely a no no.  I think this one just wasn’t a good match.  Not very interested in getting to know me, other than being compensated, and did not even want a voice or video call, which you could view as a pre-meet M&G, even when I pointed out it was just as much to make her feel more comfortable that who she is speaking to is real.
I think the big difference between seeking and AW etc is how you approach it. For escorts you look at some photos, pick tge one you like and off you go. With seeking that doesnt really work as the one you like may be a scammer, out of your price range or just doesnt reply. Seeking is more of a numbers game. Hit a whole bunch of girls you like and see who’s left standing at the end then arrange to see the best of those. Rinse and repeat.

Im looking for longer term too but the way you get there is one date at a time (obviously). PPM is a good first step whatever the intentions as it is safest for both parties in terms of being scammed. Some girls dont want ppm at all and you need another approach but I wouldnt necessarily reject girls who suggest ppm. Its just the norm and doesnt mean they are semi pro. With everything its about how you word things. Just play the conversation by ear and make your approach accordingly. Really on your first sub you’re just learning how to do this. Its not something anyone can tell you but its easy enough to pick up

Offline updownandaround

Thanks.  This is exactly the approach I have taken, but how do you prevent the following from happening:

1. Girl agrees she’s also looking for long term (and makes point that all the other guys are just wanting PPM and a one night stand)
2. We then agree let’s take it slow, BUT girl says she doesn’t expect sex in first meet
3. 2 is fine, but then also says for the trouble of time and travelling, wants first couple of meets to be PPM

Now I’m in a situation where they expect me to pay, AND not get sex.  Worst of both worlds.  Difficult to now turn round and say, “you know what, I’m happy to do a PPM but we going to need to have sex”.

My mantra in navigating Seeking is super simple. No sex = no money, no Ubers or anything other than a drink. If any girl that makes rules about the first date then I next them. I know this may seem brutal but I don't want to waste time I could be using to see other girls. If a girl doesn't want to jump your bones on a first date then she is probably not that interested or is playing a longer game to rinse you for your resources. I'm not interested in holding hands for 3 dates, a kiss on the 4th and maybe a lacklustre blowie on the 5th. The problem with this approach is that you'll miss out on a few good ones a long the way but it's not like there's a shortage of girls on Seeking.

I also never do dinner on a first date for a number of reasons, the main one being I have no idea if I want to spend 90 minutes eating with a girl I don't know or have any idea if she has any chat. And it's not unheard of for girls will go out with a guy she's not interested in to go to somewhere cool to eat for free and then post the pics up on Insta. 😂

Offline Atrueyorkie

Thanks.  This is exactly the approach I have taken, but how do you prevent the following from happening:

1. Girl agrees she’s also looking for long term (and makes point that all the other guys are just wanting PPM and a one night stand)
2. We then agree let’s take it slow, BUT girl says she doesn’t expect sex in first meet
3. 2 is fine, but then also says for the trouble of time and travelling, wants first couple of meets to be PPM

Now I’m in a situation where they expect me to pay, AND not get sex.  Worst of both worlds.  Difficult to now turn round and say, “you know what, I’m happy to do a PPM but we going to need to have sex”.

First thing is your bio should do a lot of talking for you to avoid any confusion down the line.

When you’re speaking you can make it evident that you don’t pay for platonic dates. That rules out time wasters or anyone who’s just looking to pull wool over your eyes.

You set the pace for most things, be as upfront what you want as possible, the rest is experience.

Offline Cunning Punt

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Got a problem here guys.
I was approached on seeking and we got chatting. Moved the conversation to WhatsApp and suddenly she hits me with a message where she sends screenshots of my personal social media profiles and my wife's.
She then demands a 900 payment to keep quiet otherwise she is going to message my wife and all her contacts that I am paying girls for sex.

I am in a panic now and don't know what to do

Other guys have given plenty of advice on how to handle her. In terms of general advice going forward to prevent this happening to you and others:

1) Use a burner phone/2nd SIM for SA and punting, and set up a 2nd WhatsApp account for that number specifically, to converse with SBs and SPs.
2) Do NOT link this number to your normal, personal social media accounts or even log in once via it. On Facebook this leaves a footprint that then suggests you to people with phone numbers in your contacts lists.
3) Use unique photos on your SA profile that aren't anywhere else, or look anything like other photos of you, on the web.

« Last Edit: January 15, 2024, 02:53:44 pm by Cunning Punt »

Offline updownandaround

Other guys have given plenty of advice on how to handle her. In terms of general advice going forward to prevent this happening to you and others:

1) Use a burner phone/2nd SIM for SA and punting, and set up a 2nd WhatsApp account for that number specifically, to converse with SBs and SPs.
2) Do NOT link this number to your normal, personal social media accounts or even log in once via it. On Facebook this leaves a footprint that then suggests you to people with phone numbers in your contacts lists.
3) Use unique photos on your SA profile that aren't anywhere else, or look anything like other photos of you, on the web.

And..

4) Run any photos you do use on Seeking or send to a girl through PimEyes and see if it can find you on the web!

I know for a fact that PimEyes is used by quite a few girls to get background information on guys, it is perhaps the best known facial recognition service that is in the public domain.

Offline anonman2

Yeah just using photos you haven't used anywhere else isn't good enough. If it's a photo of your face then Pimeyes and FaceCheck and whatever else there is out there will be able to link you. You can have your face forgotten in those apps, it's worth your time putting your photos through it and seeing what the results are.

Offline Payyourwaymate

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First thing is your bio should do a lot of talking for you to avoid any confusion down the line.

When you’re speaking you can make it evident that you don’t pay for platonic dates. That rules out time wasters or anyone who’s just looking to pull wool over your eyes.

You set the pace for most things, be as upfront what you want as possible, the rest is experience.

Ahh you're back. Hope the break was good and you feel better  :hi:.

Offline Atrueyorkie

Ahh you're back. Hope the break was good and you feel better  :hi:.

Yep the storm has gone, all good mate, back and replenished   :drinks:

Offline manymis123

Started my membership back at Seeking last week and have a meet scheduled tomorrow   :D
She's asking for me to buy and send her same-day return train ticket for ~£28 . I know its her I'm chatting to as her number comes out on her personal socials.

Should I go ahead with paying her travel down to London?

Offline 90125

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Started my membership back at Seeking last week and have a meet scheduled tomorrow   :D
She's asking for me to buy and send her same-day return train ticket for ~£28 . I know its her I'm chatting to as her number comes out on her personal socials.

Should I go ahead with paying her travel down to London?

No, see an Escort instead and post your 1st Review in 8 years of membership  :P

Offline flamingice

My mantra in navigating Seeking is super simple. No sex = no money, no Ubers or anything other than a drink. If any girl that makes rules about the first date then I next them. I know this may seem brutal but I don't want to waste time I could be using to see other girls. If a girl doesn't want to jump your bones on a first date then she is probably not that interested or is playing a longer game to rinse you for your resources. I'm not interested in holding hands for 3 dates, a kiss on the 4th and maybe a lacklustre blowie on the 5th. The problem with this approach is that you'll miss out on a few good ones a long the way but it's not like there's a shortage of girls on Seeking.

I also never do dinner on a first date for a number of reasons, the main one being I have no idea if I want to spend 90 minutes eating with a girl I don't know or have any idea if she has any chat. And it's not unheard of for girls will go out with a guy she's not interested in to go to somewhere cool to eat for free and then post the pics up on Insta. 😂

Thanks, and to others offering advice here.  I know there’s a tonne of good info in these 300 pages, but sometimes it helps to get fresh insights.

You mention an interesting point on not paying for Ubers.  Is this a hard rule or just usual rule.  One girl is saying she can get a train to London, but then would like me to pick up the Uber to the meeting place.  Ok or a red flag?  At most it’s going to be £20, not exactly breaking the bank.  Or is this something to steer clear of.

Secondly, and more importantly (and I know I need to read through the backlog here) any rule of thumb on what you should quote when they ask what I’ll pay for a PPM?  I have no idea what I am aiming for, and there’s the added variable of not knowing if they are thinking one hour or one night.  I read a few pages back not to cap yourself by suggesting a time limit.  I think that’s right.  I obviously don’t want to be paying over the odds, but equally I don’t want to be putting something laughable on offer.  What’s a good opening price?

Thanks

Offline harryhavanagh

Started my membership back at Seeking last week and have a meet scheduled tomorrow   :D
She's asking for me to buy and send her same-day return train ticket for ~£28 . I know its her I'm chatting to as her number comes out on her personal socials.

Should I go ahead with paying her travel down to London?

Buy the ticket, don’t send the money. You just send her the QR codes and all good, I’m pretty sure. Never got this far, personally, as the girls always want the cash, which is a scam and I refuse.

Offline tazz

Anyone seen Luciana  tells me shes lives in Belgravia and a model. I offered £300 a meet.

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Offline southcoastpunter

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Flaming ice - there are no “rules “ - other than don’t say PPM or offer money on the Seeking message system - anything that can be taken as offfering money for sex will get you banned!
After that - it’s all personal to you - what you are comfortable with, what you want, what you are prepared to “risk “ and how much you think she is worth to you!
If you have read back a bit you know what the common scams are and use normal common sense! In terms of money - you will read that guys offer anything from 150 to about 400 ish!

Offline NuruGuru

Per the above post I can reveal she opened at 300ppm or 1k monthly and by her own words still has further leeway thus my reasonable comment before.

I only declined due to her unwillingness to do unpaid M&G as semi-pros are a hard limit for me now.

You dodged a bullet here - I was seeing this SB a couple of years ago and she went all psycho when I stopped seeing her.
She then handed number out to people who started to threaten to phone work and tell them I was seeing a "sex worker" and who had all my pics too.

I called her bluff in the end and told her to go ahead... obviously she didn't have the guts, but it just shows how conniving some of these SA girls can be.

Offline updownandaround

Thanks, and to others offering advice here.  I know there’s a tonne of good info in these 300 pages, but sometimes it helps to get fresh insights.

You mention an interesting point on not paying for Ubers.  Is this a hard rule or just usual rule.  One girl is saying she can get a train to London, but then would like me to pick up the Uber to the meeting place.  Ok or a red flag?  At most it’s going to be £20, not exactly breaking the bank.  Or is this something to steer clear of.

Secondly, and more importantly (and I know I need to read through the backlog here) any rule of thumb on what you should quote when they ask what I’ll pay for a PPM?  I have no idea what I am aiming for, and there’s the added variable of not knowing if they are thinking one hour or one night.  I read a few pages back not to cap yourself by suggesting a time limit.  I think that’s right.  I obviously don’t want to be paying over the odds, but equally I don’t want to be putting something laughable on offer.  What’s a good opening price?

Thanks

If I am paying a girl for sex then I see no reason whatsoever to pick up the cost of her transport, either coming to or going from the venue.

The only times I will pay for an Uber or a taxi are:

1) When it's a freebie and it's late.
2) If a girl doesn't take my subtle prompts for her to leave after sex and I just want her out of the door.

If I do get her an Uber then I just give her the money for it, I never book it on my Uber account.

A lot of girls will try it on with travel expenses and many girls on more vanilla dating apps like Tinder will ask for it. It's a great way to gauge her real interest too, if she is prepared to be out of pocket to come and spend time with you then it's a good sign.

As for pricing, I suspect many other posters will have their own advice and thoughts on this and I prefix this with the following being a reflection of my experience in London. I find the magic number is £300 in London. This will mostly depend on their circumstances, their age and where they live in London. Generally the younger they are the more likely they are to dip below the 300 mark. This will also depend on their location, girls genuinely living in central London may want more and a girl living in Bromley may settle for less for example.

All girls know their number and that's based on their relative repulsion to you. I will generally ask what it is they want and they will normally spew out a higher number. As a rule of thumb, I will half whatever they throw out. They may refuse at this point then depending on how much you fancy her then you can adjust your offer accordingly or reduce what she needs to do for the money. So just say you want a BJ instead of sex or that you have a time limit. This might seem counter intuitive but I've not met many girls who don't get hot and horny giving oral and then want to have sex as a result unless they are a seasoned pro.

A lot of girls new to Seeking want the money but they also don't want to ask the format of the meet, what your sexual preferences are or how long she is expected to stay. It's all an unknown and therefore scary to them. Being clear about that and that you're not into anything weird will often defuse the pricing discussion.

If you can't get to a number you both agree on then politely decline regardless of any shaming tactics she uses (you're a brokie, you're cheap etc), bow out and tell her that if she changes her mind then she knows where to find you. One of the big issues on Seeking is you're often competing with guys who offer a load of money and then don't follow up with the girl in question. So she thinks she's worth way more money than she is but then comes to the sobering realisation that all these offers amount to nothing, they are just offers. Time and patience in these situations is your friend. 😀

Offline Atrueyorkie

Thanks, and to others offering advice here.  I know there’s a tonne of good info in these 300 pages, but sometimes it helps to get fresh insights.

You mention an interesting point on not paying for Ubers.  Is this a hard rule or just usual rule.  One girl is saying she can get a train to London, but then would like me to pick up the Uber to the meeting place.  Ok or a red flag?  At most it’s going to be £20, not exactly breaking the bank.  Or is this something to steer clear of.

Secondly, and more importantly (and I know I need to read through the backlog here) any rule of thumb on what you should quote when they ask what I’ll pay for a PPM?  I have no idea what I am aiming for, and there’s the added variable of not knowing if they are thinking one hour or one night.  I read a few pages back not to cap yourself by suggesting a time limit.  I think that’s right.  I obviously don’t want to be paying over the odds, but equally I don’t want to be putting something laughable on offer.  What’s a good opening price?

Thanks

Depends on the demographic you’re going for. I’ve not needed to go over 200. You definitely don’t need to go over 300. Of course you’ll have some who will chuck out ludicrous amounts but that’s not the vast majority in my experience. You dictate what you pay, if they’re not happy with it move on, there will definitely be 5 who will take up that offer that the one rejected.

Also an important factor is your limit. What can you afford to do. Think of it if you were to see this girl potentially every week, could you afford to do so.

Regarding the Uber, depends how expensive it is and again up to you, I wouldn’t make it a regular habit unless the girl has no other way of getting to you (public transport has stopped due time of day). Those costs of hotel, food/drinks and the Uber will build up.

You set the time limit. You don’t want one hour otherwise you might as well visit a WG. It should be a go with the flow attitude

Offline WKD123

Depends on the demographic you’re going for. I’ve not needed to go over 200. You definitely don’t need to go over 300. Of course you’ll have some who will chuck out ludicrous amounts but that’s not the vast majority in my experience. You dictate what you pay, if they’re not happy with it move on, there will definitely be 5 who will take up that offer that the one rejected.


There's a lot of truth in this - the most I have agreed is £400 per meet, the minimum has been £250 but I have also found that the lower end has also been the most disappointing. A few suggestions have been in the region of £600 so I say "good luck" and move on.  As others have advised many times, if you can build up a conversation and spend some time getting to know your potential SB before you start banding around the £££ then you are more likely to reach a mutually agreeable arrangement, whether this be an allowance or PPM.   That is quite a challenge though, as most seasoned SBs will want to discuss figures before they agree to a M&G...

Offline jakplo22

Payyourwaymate
Lifestyle inflation on their end where their income is not necessarily fixed from "traditional skill sets". They get into a situation where they lose a "££££ whale" who was paying them an exorbitant allowance, but still have high outgoings from the lifestyle they have become accustomed to; they will go broke. Chris Rock said it best, women can't go backwards in lifestyle and men can't go backwards sexually.



I do know girls who get and have got £15-20k per month. It does happen but I’ve not known it last more than 5 years. Either the SD goes busts or gets bored. It’s still a lot of money over 5 years but materialism kicks in, most girls are young and end up wasting it. It’s a reality check for the girl when it all goes and the realisation hits them that they were lucky and getting that kind of money again isn’t easy at all. The main issue being that the girl is older. £15-20k girls need to do it as early as possible. My view is early 20s on wards is the sweet spot but after 29-30 it gets harder


And no girl iv’e know have ever been exclusive regardless of the money.

This is of course anecdotal.

I'm still curious as to how you got all this information Robbie? The only reason I can think of why you would know or care so much about a girl's 'earning potential' is if you were taking a cut of these earnings.

Offline bigden40

There's a lot of truth in this - the most I have agreed is £400 per meet, the minimum has been £250 but I have also found that the lower end has also been the most disappointing. A few suggestions have been in the region of £600 so I say "good luck" and move on.  As others have advised many times, if you can build up a conversation and spend some time getting to know your potential SB before you start banding around the £££ then you are more likely to reach a mutually agreeable arrangement, whether this be an allowance or PPM.   That is quite a challenge though, as most seasoned SBs will want to discuss figures before they agree to a M&G...

I’ve had the opposite experience, I’ve had more disappointment when I’ve not stuck to my guns and paid more.

Offline Punting2022

There's a lot of truth in this - the most I have agreed is £400 per meet, the minimum has been £250 but I have also found that the lower end has also been the most disappointing. A few suggestions have been in the region of £600 so I say "good luck" and move on.  As others have advised many times, if you can build up a conversation and spend some time getting to know your potential SB before you start banding around the £££ then you are more likely to reach a mutually agreeable arrangement, whether this be an allowance or PPM.   That is quite a challenge though, as most seasoned SBs will want to discuss figures before they agree to a M&G...

I will be sticking to £300 max now. If they say no forget it. In the past i have agreed more as i had no one. Bad Mistake. These girls are getting so much from Multiple men. Even if not on site there will be a ex daddy somewhere. Yet they play us men like fools.

Offline DeanoDeano

I'm still curious as to how you got all this information Robbie? The only reason I can think of why you would know or care so much about a girl's 'earning potential' is if you were taking a cut of these earnings.

In my experience plenty of women I have met from seeking are happy to share / boast…

Offline NightKid

You dodged a bullet here - I was seeing this SB a couple of years ago and she went all psycho when I stopped seeing her.
She then handed number out to people who started to threaten to phone work and tell them I was seeing a "sex worker" and who had all my pics too.

I called her bluff in the end and told her to go ahead... obviously she didn't have the guts, but it just shows how conniving some of these SA girls can be.

Thanks for the info, good to know my instincts are working well lol

Out of curiosity though, was she a great shag before she went cuckoo?

Offline updownandaround

In my experience plenty of women I have met from seeking are happy to share / boast…

I had one girl who logged into her OF account and showed me her revenue for the last few months. 😂

Offline flamingice

If I am paying a girl for sex then I see no reason whatsoever to pick up the cost of her transport, either coming to or going from the venue.

The only times I will pay for an Uber or a taxi are:

1) When it's a freebie and it's late.
2) If a girl doesn't take my subtle prompts for her to leave after sex and I just want her out of the door.

If I do get her an Uber then I just give her the money for it, I never book it on my Uber account.

A lot of girls will try it on with travel expenses and many girls on more vanilla dating apps like Tinder will ask for it. It's a great way to gauge her real interest too, if she is prepared to be out of pocket to come and spend time with you then it's a good sign.

As for pricing, I suspect many other posters will have their own advice and thoughts on this and I prefix this with the following being a reflection of my experience in London. I find the magic number is £300 in London. This will mostly depend on their circumstances, their age and where they live in London. Generally the younger they are the more likely they are to dip below the 300 mark. This will also depend on their location, girls genuinely living in central London may want more and a girl living in Bromley may settle for less for example.

All girls know their number and that's based on their relative repulsion to you. I will generally ask what it is they want and they will normally spew out a higher number. As a rule of thumb, I will half whatever they throw out. They may refuse at this point then depending on how much you fancy her then you can adjust your offer accordingly or reduce what she needs to do for the money. So just say you want a BJ instead of sex or that you have a time limit. This might seem counter intuitive but I've not met many girls who don't get hot and horny giving oral and then want to have sex as a result unless they are a seasoned pro.

A lot of girls new to Seeking want the money but they also don't want to ask the format of the meet, what your sexual preferences are or how long she is expected to stay. It's all an unknown and therefore scary to them. Being clear about that and that you're not into anything weird will often defuse the pricing discussion.

If you can't get to a number you both agree on then politely decline regardless of any shaming tactics she uses (you're a brokie, you're cheap etc), bow out and tell her that if she changes her mind then she knows where to find you. One of the big issues on Seeking is you're often competing with guys who offer a load of money and then don't follow up with the girl in question. So she thinks she's worth way more money than she is but then comes to the sobering realisation that all these offers amount to nothing, they are just offers. Time and patience in these situations is your friend. 😀

This is all very helpful.  I tend to agree that the “rate” is the all in price, and on them to figure out and pay their transport logistics.  I agree those two situations make perfect sense where paying for Ubers are fine.

You also addressed the key question I was after which was the ballpark rate.  I have tended to ask the girls to quote first, and feels like that 300-400 mark is the norm.  Interesting you say the younger ones might go lower.  I am more focussed on the lower age group (18-24 yo), so perhaps I should push a bit on negotiations.  I am not worried about being shamed for that matter.  As you say, the sobering reality is offers vs actual deals done.  I do feel somewhat the girls have the upper hand…they have the looks, I am attracted to them and they have something I want.  But I realise this is all in my head as equally on the flipside - we have the money and I’m good for the cash as long as I am getting what I want.

You are recommending being clear on how a PPM should look?  Do you go into such details about duration and how much sex is included?  For the London average, say 300, what should I expect for that?  If I translate that to an agency escort that would probably only get me 1 hour with two rounds.

Thanks again.  It is my first sub and I’m still to have a first meet.  I have gotten a lot of messages and numbers over to WA, with some offers to which I have said I’ll message them when I am next free.  Of course I am not mentioning any PPM or money on the platform (so thanks for those who keep reiterating this).  I cannot help but feel perhaps SA is not for me.  Feels like it’s just another escort site with the added disadvantage that she won’t host, you are disclosing pics (even these are unreachable pics no where else online), giving out a number, and ultimately operating with a lot more opacity to what is on offer.  I get it if I find a gem, then probably makes all the effort worth it, but I’m not counting on it.

For a little more context, I’m still youngish, single, and in good shape, with a lifestyle that for the vast majority of the girls (excluding the Monaco yacht whores) I believe would find acceptably upgrading.  I was perhaps naively thinking I’d find some freebies on SA or longer term girls happy with a good lifestyle and could jump into a more regular type thing.  However, as mentioned, feels 90%+ are transaction focussed,and hence just another escort site.  Appreciate YMMV  :hi:

Offline DeanoDeano

If it’s your first time on seeking I would definitely suggest you read the thread, or as much of it as you can cope with.

One thing I would say is that as a youngish guy looking for a paid / ppm arrangement you’re quite possibly going to get discriminated by some women because if they’re looking for financial support they’ll think you are looking to treat it as a normal dating app, and if they’re looking for a natural / normal relationship they might think you’re too young and not together enough…

Actually I’m a bit confused about you are looking for - first half of your post has lots of questions around financial support, and then the second half suggests you’re looking for a long term FWB / fuck buddy without financial allowance etc .

One thing I would definitely suggest is that you figure out what you’re looking for and be able to articulate it to the many many women for whom “what are you looking for on here?” Will be one of the first questions they ask…
« Last Edit: January 17, 2024, 04:27:52 pm by DeanoDeano »

Offline PumpDump

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This is all very helpful.  I tend to agree that the “rate” is the all in price, and on them to figure out and pay their transport logistics.  I agree those two situations make perfect sense where paying for Ubers are fine.

You also addressed the key question I was after which was the ballpark rate.  I have tended to ask the girls to quote first, and feels like that 300-400 mark is the norm.  Interesting you say the younger ones might go lower.  I am more focussed on the lower age group (18-24 yo), so perhaps I should push a bit on negotiations.  I am not worried about being shamed for that matter.  As you say, the sobering reality is offers vs actual deals done.  I do feel somewhat the girls have the upper hand…they have the looks, I am attracted to them and they have something I want.  But I realise this is all in my head as equally on the flipside - we have the money and I’m good for the cash as long as I am getting what I want.

You are recommending being clear on how a PPM should look?  Do you go into such details about duration and how much sex is included?  For the London average, say 300, what should I expect for that?  If I translate that to an agency escort that would probably only get me 1 hour with two rounds.

Thanks again.  It is my first sub and I’m still to have a first meet.  I have gotten a lot of messages and numbers over to WA, with some offers to which I have said I’ll message them when I am next free.  Of course I am not mentioning any PPM or money on the platform (so thanks for those who keep reiterating this).  I cannot help but feel perhaps SA is not for me.  Feels like it’s just another escort site with the added disadvantage that she won’t host, you are disclosing pics (even these are unreachable pics no where else online), giving out a number, and ultimately operating with a lot more opacity to what is on offer.  I get it if I find a gem, then probably makes all the effort worth it, but I’m not counting on it.

For a little more context, I’m still youngish, single, and in good shape, with a lifestyle that for the vast majority of the girls (excluding the Monaco yacht whores) I believe would find acceptably upgrading.  I was perhaps naively thinking I’d find some freebies on SA or longer term girls happy with a good lifestyle and could jump into a more regular type thing.  However, as mentioned, feels 90%+ are transaction focussed,and hence just another escort site.  Appreciate YMMV  :hi:

I know it's not exactly the same as Seeking, but pre-Covid I was meeting students in London who replied to my ads on CL. They were charging £50 - 60 for 30 mins in their student accommodation. These students were in their very early 20s. As CL is no longer accepting ads of this type I assume many of them have moved to Seeking and similar platforms. So you should be able to find girls operating in these price ranges.
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Offline updownandaround

This is all very helpful.  I tend to agree that the “rate” is the all in price, and on them to figure out and pay their transport logistics.  I agree those two situations make perfect sense where paying for Ubers are fine.

You also addressed the key question I was after which was the ballpark rate.  I have tended to ask the girls to quote first, and feels like that 300-400 mark is the norm.  Interesting you say the younger ones might go lower.  I am more focussed on the lower age group (18-24 yo), so perhaps I should push a bit on negotiations.  I am not worried about being shamed for that matter.  As you say, the sobering reality is offers vs actual deals done.  I do feel somewhat the girls have the upper hand…they have the looks, I am attracted to them and they have something I want.  But I realise this is all in my head as equally on the flipside - we have the money and I’m good for the cash as long as I am getting what I want.

You are recommending being clear on how a PPM should look?  Do you go into such details about duration and how much sex is included?  For the London average, say 300, what should I expect for that?  If I translate that to an agency escort that would probably only get me 1 hour with two rounds.

Thanks again.  It is my first sub and I’m still to have a first meet.  I have gotten a lot of messages and numbers over to WA, with some offers to which I have said I’ll message them when I am next free.  Of course I am not mentioning any PPM or money on the platform (so thanks for those who keep reiterating this).  I cannot help but feel perhaps SA is not for me.  Feels like it’s just another escort site with the added disadvantage that she won’t host, you are disclosing pics (even these are unreachable pics no where else online), giving out a number, and ultimately operating with a lot more opacity to what is on offer.  I get it if I find a gem, then probably makes all the effort worth it, but I’m not counting on it.

For a little more context, I’m still youngish, single, and in good shape, with a lifestyle that for the vast majority of the girls (excluding the Monaco yacht whores) I believe would find acceptably upgrading.  I was perhaps naively thinking I’d find some freebies on SA or longer term girls happy with a good lifestyle and could jump into a more regular type thing.  However, as mentioned, feels 90%+ are transaction focussed,and hence just another escort site.  Appreciate YMMV  :hi:

Ok, I tried to do a nicely formatted post to address your points but it didn't work, so here goes..

What I meant by being clear about the format of the "date" is to be clear about the fact you expect intimacy in exchange for money and that you have an evening free. If you want her to stay over then say so, if you only have 3 hours then say so. If you go into too much clinical detail on sex acts that will scare the bejesus out of civvies or newbies.

The pros and semipros will want to be in and out as soon as possible for doing the least amount of work for the money. I'm a volume guy, so I want the girls in and out too so I can tidy up the room for the next one. (Unless I find one particularly interesting to talk to or has a sexual "wow" factor)

For a civvie/newbie girl, it's not unreasonable for 300 to cover an entire evening of intimacy with all the standard stuff - oral, kissing and full sex. And as many times as you and her can manage, of course it depends on your chemistry. Some girls will offer up anal if they are into that and you have lube but in my experience it's not that common. If the vibe is there then it's not uncommon for a girl to stay over depending on what she wore to the venue. If she's totally dressed up and didn't bring a change of clothes she's going to have mighty walk of shame vibes when leaving a hotel for instance.

Also my pricing guide of 300 is based on my experiences in London. You can get it lower for sure, it depends on the girl and how new she is or how much reading she's done on pricing on forum like Reddit's SLF.

I think another poster recommended having a good read of the posts on this thread. There is a wealth of information and lessons on here, take some time out to digest as much as you can.

The other thing I will say about Seeking is that the money just makes it easier, it doesn't take the grind out of the acquisition of sex or the nonsense you have to go through in order to get it. Money is the lubricant for the grind. 😂 You may not get results immediately, I see a lot of people on here complaining about Seeking in that regard. However, you will find some amazing girls who will give you fantastic rewarding sex but also some batshit crazy ones too.

If you run into any problems, give me a shout.

Offline stampjones

I know it's not exactly the same as Seeking, but pre-Covid I was meeting students in London who replied to my ads on CL. They were charging £50 - 60 for 30 mins in their student accommodation. These students were in their very early 20s. As CL is no longer accepting ads of this type I assume many of them have moved to Seeking and similar platforms. So you should be able to find girls operating in these price ranges.
Unfortunately not. I was doing the CL thing back then too (still occasionally get a hit) and for whatever reason they didnt tend to be the same girls. I even mentioned seeking to a couple of CL girls and they just looked at me like I was stupid. These days in London if anyone is getting those sort of prices I’d be pretty surprised and very jealous. Back in pre-covid days CL prices were around half the base SA rates if I remember correctly. Core SA ppm has gone from about 150 then to 250 now for the girls I see.

Offline PumpDump

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Unfortunately not. I was doing the CL thing back then too (still occasionally get a hit) and for whatever reason they didnt tend to be the same girls. I even mentioned seeking to a couple of CL girls and they just looked at me like I was stupid. These days in London if anyone is getting those sort of prices I’d be pretty surprised and very jealous. Back in pre-covid days CL prices were around half the base SA rates if I remember correctly. Core SA ppm has gone from about 150 then to 250 now for the girls I see.

I think £250 is a good price if you are spending 2 - 3 hours and getting multiple fucks. The £60 I was paying was for 30 mins so £250 for 2 hours is the same.

I still meet some of the CL girls, they are no longer students now, but working in their first job that doesn't pay that much. So they come to me for a top up :-)  For these girls I think selling their body for sex was supposed to be a short term plan while at uni. But once they discover they can make easy money that way it is difficult not to be tempted to do it again when cash is needed. A bit like once you become a punter it is very difficult to ever stop.
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