Kelly may London royal oak

[Cuntminion]

The sp
External Link/Members Only

comms
Excellent uke and text

physical
As per uke media, no face pictures but found very pretty

interpersonal/attitude
Funny, intelligent, easy to get along with

venue
Great in call location, good links to public transport, usual amenities shower, towel, bedroom for some of the booking and living area for watersports

rate
£170 p/h

clockwatcher
Nope

services offered/received
A lot of services offered, watersports, anal, cim hence the rate, all in rather than add ons, works for me
Had asked Kelly to take imitative as I'm not proactive in the bedroom and she did this well and seems to be able adjust and flow in a booking well

booking
A lot of firsts
Don't engage in penetration hardly ever and didn't today but something to progress to as meet was very arousing and me usually useless nob had a bit more life in it

Firsts for me
Watersports (receiving) - interesting, could grow to like this didn't not enjoy it but was first time so bit took back had intended to give but I thought if I push any harder for a piss I'd break wind, lo and behold as soon as left booking was pissing all the way home, maybe first time nerves so had trouble pissing 

Fingering- enjoyed albeit didn't have a Scooby what I was doing

69-never done this before, it's fucking awesome and not the logistical nightmare I'd imagined

Spitting both ways - loved this, real turn on

Done the set menu owo , dfk, to

The owo, wow me nobs not the biggest, maybe average in China but was deep owo , really deep, enjoyable and no gag reflex

Finished with cim and snowball and more spitting

Bit of a departure from my usual bookings but really enjoyed getting messy, big turn on

will see again?
Definitely

[FlyingBreadMan]

I have faith this ain't a Damage Control Review right.

Because it's just not needed. When did you see her?

[threechilliman]

If ever I get to London, this is the one. Pissing and spitting. Oh yes!!

[Cuntminion]

I have faith this ain't a Damage Control Review right.

Because it's just not needed. When did you see her?

No not at all had been booked for nearly four weeks, saw today

[unus669]

Thank f**k, you two have done it.

Good one Coma

[Cuntminion]

Thank f**k, you two have done it.

Good one Coma

Cheers

[Cuntminion]

If ever I get to London, this is the one. Pissing and spitting. Oh yes!!

Watersports was interesting, wasn't full golden shower just on torso mostly, would have to do again to gauge how much I personally enjoy it as was completely new

Spitting, loved it might seem disgusting but I really liked it

[FlyingBreadMan]

No not at all had been booked for nearly four weeks, saw today

I Had faith.

 

[Sinz]

Hidden Image/Members Only Hidden Image/Members Only Hidden Image/Members Only

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[The Owl]

OMFG YOU DID IT! 

Kudos dude, glad you had a fun time and you're still alive.

Is Kelly May any good at cuddling?

[Cuntminion]

OMFG YOU DID IT! 

Kudos dude, glad you had a fun time and you're still alive.

Is Kelly May any good at cuddling?

Yes hugs are good

I was worried going for more extreme services I'd lose the vanilla parts I like but it meshed together very well 

[OutForJustice80]

Glad you had a good punt.

Can I ask, and feel free to tell me to fuck off, did you book her primarily  because of the repartee on UKE or did you have an urge to try a different set of services? She doesn’t fit your typical MO as far as I can tell.

[Romney]

Thanks for the review OP.

Her profile currently says "not taking new bookings".

Does anyone know what that means?  Is she not taking new clients or she's taking a break, or what?

[OutForJustice80]

Thanks for the review OP.

Her profile currently says "not taking new bookings".

Does anyone know what that means?  Is she not taking new clients or she's taking a break, or what?

Probably that she’s booked up for as far ahead as she cares to look?

[SamLP]

I can't take this review seriously nor find it credible.

For someone to court someone publicly for weeks and weeks, taking over so many topics and going pages and pages with their own flirting, right until it became an annoyance for many. Was there gonna be any other outcome?

It's even evident with some of the comments on here. OMG you finally say her etc etc.. It's punting, not dating. It's not courting. i'm sure Kelly May is a good service provider, so this isn't an attack on her, but after all that went down, there's no way this is a non-biased review and as a result can't be taken seriously IMO.

[STAR-LORD]

The sp
External Link/Members Only

comms
Excellent uke and text

physical
As per uke media, no face pictures but found very pretty

interpersonal/attitude
Funny, intelligent, easy to get along with

venue
Great in call location, good links to public transport, usual amenities shower, towel, bedroom for some of the booking and living area for watersports

rate
£170 p/h

clockwatcher
Nope

services offered/received
A lot of services offered, watersports, anal, cim hence the rate, all in rather than add ons, works for me
Had asked Kelly to take imitative as I'm not proactive in the bedroom and she did this well and seems to be able adjust and flow in a booking well

booking
A lot of firsts
Don't engage in penetration hardly ever and didn't today but something to progress to as meet was very arousing and me usually useless nob had a bit more life in it

Firsts for me
Watersports (receiving) - interesting, could grow to like this didn't not enjoy it but was first time so bit took back had intended to give but I thought if I push any harder for a piss I'd break wind, lo and behold as soon as left booking was pissing all the way home, maybe first time nerves so had trouble pissing 

Fingering- enjoyed albeit didn't have a Scooby what I was doing

69-never done this before, it's fucking awesome and not the logistical nightmare I'd imagined

Spitting both ways - loved this, real turn on

Done the set menu owo , dfk, to

The owo, wow me nobs not the biggest, maybe average in China but was deep owo , really deep, enjoyable and no gag reflex

Finished with cim and snowball and more spitting

Bit of a departure from my usual bookings but really enjoyed getting messy, big turn on

will see again?
Definitely

After all that crazy, insulting flirting on UKE, I salute you. 

Hidden Image/Members Only

[STAR-LORD]

I can't take this review seriously nor find it credible.

For someone to court someone publicly for weeks and weeks, taking over so many topics and going pages and pages with their own flirting, right until it became an annoyance for many. Was there gonna be any other outcome?

It's even evident with some of the comments on here. OMG you finally say her etc etc.. It's punting, not dating. It's not courting. i'm sure Kelly May is a good service provider, so this isn't an attack on her, but after all that went down, there's no way this is a non-biased review and as a result can't be taken seriously IMO.

TBH Sam LP, there's only one thing I can't believe. That he's never tried - a 69er in 13 reviews. Or that outside punting (unless he has and didn't mention). He's majorly lost out in previous experiences. 😑

[Cuntminion]

Glad you had a good punt.

Can I ask, and feel free to tell me to fuck off, did you book her primarily  because of the repartee on UKE or did you have an urge to try a different set of services? She doesn’t fit your typical MO as far as I can tell.

Bit of both

I wanted to try new things and how she came across was assuming as others who may of offered similar services I considered before didn't strike me as individuals I'd want to book

I'm not sure what my typical MO is perceived as but I don't really have a preference on sight as such

Great media alone wouldn't make me book nor an appealing service list, attitude is important and first on me list

[Cuntminion]

I can't take this review seriously nor find it credible.

For someone to court someone publicly for weeks and weeks, taking over so many topics and going pages and pages with their own flirting, right until it became an annoyance for many. Was there gonna be any other outcome?

It's even evident with some of the comments on here. OMG you finally say her etc etc.. It's punting, not dating. It's not courting. i'm sure Kelly May is a good service provider, so this isn't an attack on her, but after all that went down, there's no way this is a non-biased review and as a result can't be taken seriously IMO.

Well then it's rather fortunate I don't give a fuck what you think

 

[Cuntminion]

TBH Sam LP, there's only one thing I can't believe. That he's never tried - a 69er in 13 reviews. Or that outside punting (unless he has and didn't mention). He's majorly lost out in previous experiences. 😑

Never done a 69 before today just plenty of 99's that my body will back up

But will work into other bookings going forward

[STAR-LORD]

Never done a 69 before today just plenty of 99's that my body will back up

But will work into other bookings going forward

Nevermind the blooming 99's teabags...get the 69ers in. They are blooming awesome. 

Shocked me you didn't try with Holly Jameson. 

[bbwandy72]

69-never done this before, it's fucking awesome and not the logistical nightmare I'd imagined

WTF? Seriously? Wow. I'd never have guessed that.

I've been considering Kelly for a while because I want to try pushing my boundaries a bit, and she seemed like a pretty good choice for that. Good to hear she worked out for you.

[Cuntminion]

WTF? Seriously? Wow. I'd never have guessed that.

I've been considering Kelly for a while because I want to try pushing my boundaries a bit, and she seemed like a pretty good choice for that. Good to hear she worked out for you.

I just didn't fully understand what a 69 was and couldn't process the logistics

It's comfy though and kills two birds with one stone in terms of oral too

I'm a fan

[STAR-LORD]

I just didn't fully understand what a 69 was and couldn't process the logistics

It's comfy though and kills two birds with one stone in terms of oral too

I'm a fan

Well you know the logistics now. Get them in from now on. Blooming marvelous! 

[vw]

I can't take this review seriously nor find it credible.

For someone to court someone publicly for weeks and weeks, taking over so many topics and going pages and pages with their own flirting, right until it became an annoyance for many. Was there gonna be any other outcome?

It's even evident with some of the comments on here. OMG you finally say her etc etc.. It's punting, not dating. It's not courting. i'm sure Kelly May is a good service provider, so this isn't an attack on her, but after all that went down, there's no way this is a non-biased review and as a result can't be taken seriously IMO.

If you are honest would you find any of his reviews credible if there was no flirting?   

As for the  flirting, here is my post from the other day that seemed to upset UP but is relevant to your point

I think he was hoping on promotion to be this guy.   

External Link/Members Only

Up to others to make of that what they may.   

[SamLP]

Well then it's rather fortunate I don't give a fuck what you think

 

It's not about whether you give a fuck, as I honestly don't give a fuck about your giving fucks either.
I'm putting it out there for other punters.

[SamLP]

If you are honest would you find any of his reviews credible if there was no flirting?   

As for the  flirting, here is my post from the other day that seemed to upset UP but is relevant to your point

Up to others to make of that what they may.   

I've always found the flirting all too needy, as if prepping himself for a punt, hence why his reviews are hardly credible IMO.

[Cuntminion]

Ah wow guys, good teamwork

 

Credible or not

You two care more than me

 

[SamLP]

Ah wow guys, good teamwork

 

Credible or not

You two care more than me

 

Again, needy, thinking it's about you.
UKP is built on credible reviews.
Pointing out the circumstances and context for other punters to make their own minds up is the crux of the point.
However, I'm sure you don't give a fuck about that either.

[vw]

Ah wow guys, good teamwork

 

Credible or not

You two care more than me

 

No team here.   

[Cuntminion]

Again, needy, thinking it's about you.
UKP is built on credible reviews.
Pointing out the circumstances and context for other punters to make their own minds up is the crux of the point.
However, I'm sure you don't give a fuck about that either.

Well erm this booking was about me que as it was my booking?

What anyone draws from it is up to them, no?

If someone draws further from your comments it's up to them no?

All I can assure you is I would never have a commentary for any of your reviews as the opinion of a grown man who comes on like a teenage girl on her first period and stomps his feet is almost clickbait

Not even worth reading

But thank you for taking the time out to read and critique

[Cuntminion]

I've always found the flirting all too needy, as if prepping himself for a punt, hence why his reviews are hardly credible IMO.

Oh just one more thing Sam for all the flirting, needy, "it's not dating" digs

Aren't you the same fella that let his poetic skills get the pre punt juices flowing

There was once a hooker called Andrea
Just another "disaster" from Romania
She stole all the men's hearts
Using her vagina and mouth parts
And when they were done
Jizzing all over her bum
She told them to fuck off and depart
©®Samlp

There was once called a hooker called Andrea Meddan
She loved coming to London to top up her tan
That's actually a lie, but she did pack some cream
Lots of lube, condoms and wore those straight perfect seams
She sucked and fucked, and moaned and groaned
Leaving our wallets empty and our members unboned
©®samlp

And had a little moan about not getting closure when some sp fucked you off?

[vw]

Oh just one more thing Sam for all the flirting, needy, "it's not dating" digs

Aren't you the same fella that let his poetic skills get the pre punt juices flowing

There was once a hooker called Andrea
Just another "disaster" from Romania
She stole all the men's hearts
Using her vagina and mouth parts
And when they were done
Jizzing all over her bum
She told them to fuck off and depart
©®Samlp

There was once called a hooker called Andrea Meddan
She loved coming to London to top up her tan
That's actually a lie, but she did pack some cream
Lots of lube, condoms and wore those straight perfect seams
She sucked and fucked, and moaned and groaned
Leaving our wallets empty and our members unboned
©®samlp

And had a little moan about not getting closure when some sp fucked you off?

Maybe you and Sam would make a good team.   

[Heph]

I wanted to try new things and how she came across was assuming as others who may of offered similar services I considered before didn't strike me as individuals I'd want to book

You've got to help me on this please - I can't decipher what you mean.

[SamLP]

Well erm this booking was about me que as it was my booking?

What anyone draws from it is up to them, no?

If someone draws further from your comments it's up to them no?

All I can assure you is I would never have a commentary for any of your reviews as the opinion of a grown man who comes on like a teenage girl on her first period and stomps his feet is almost clickbait

Not even worth reading

But thank you for taking the time out to read and critique

How apt. Acting like a spoilt child with petty insults 

[SamLP]

Oh just one more thing Sam for all the flirting, needy, "it's not dating" digs

Aren't you the same fella that let his poetic skills get the pre punt juices flowing

There was once a hooker called Andrea
Just another "disaster" from Romania
She stole all the men's hearts
Using her vagina and mouth parts
And when they were done
Jizzing all over her bum
She told them to fuck off and depart
©®Samlp

There was once called a hooker called Andrea Meddan
She loved coming to London to top up her tan
That's actually a lie, but she did pack some cream
Lots of lube, condoms and wore those straight perfect seams
She sucked and fucked, and moaned and groaned
Leaving our wallets empty and our members unboned
©®samlp

And had a little moan about not getting closure when some sp fucked you off?

I’m glad you’re showing your true colours. A tongue in cheek poem meant to be fun and you think that’s called flirting. Give me a break. You’re a needy person which is evident for all to see. Just got to see the pat on the backs on your two latest reviews to see how the fluffiness is migrating from one site to another. This site is for credible reviews. Your review is no where near credible IMO, but as you so often do, you can’t defend the point and play a dirty game. Pathetic man 

[OutForJustice80]

I’m glad you’re showing your true colours. A tongue in cheek poem meant to be fun and you think that’s called flirting. Give me a break. You’re a needy person which is evident for all to see. Just got to see the pat on the backs on your two latest reviews to see how the fluffiness is migrating from one site to another. This site is for credible reviews. Your review is no where near credible IMO, but as you so often do, you can’t defend the point and play a dirty game. Pathetic man 

The poem is flirting. To say otherwise is ridiculous. Can’t have it both ways.

[OutForJustice80]

I can't take this review seriously nor find it credible.

For someone to court someone publicly for weeks and weeks, taking over so many topics and going pages and pages with their own flirting, right until it became an annoyance for many. Was there gonna be any other outcome?

It's even evident with some of the comments on here. OMG you finally say her etc etc.. It's punting, not dating. It's not courting. i'm sure Kelly May is a good service provider, so this isn't an attack on her, but after all that went down, there's no way this is a non-biased review and as a result can't be taken seriously IMO.

I don’t think it invalidates the review but I think for punters who haven’t seen the build up on Uke it’s important to place it in context.

It seems though that you issue is personal because what you’re really saying here is that you wouldn’t trust Coma to have the integrity to give a negative if it was deserved.

[HighlyMotivated]

Anyone got a link to the UKE thread? Sounds worth a read 

[Thepacifist]

Thanks for the review Coma. Happy to hear you finally got around to seeing Kelly and you had a good time. 

[threechilliman]

Anyone got a link to the UKE thread? Sounds worth a read 

Which one?

[HighlyMotivated]

Which one?

Where this pre punt courtship/flirting between OP and WG took place

[OutForJustice80]

Where this pre punt courtship/flirting between OP and WG took place

There are... several options, shall we say.

[vw]

Anyone got a link to the UKE thread? Sounds worth a read 

It's not one it is 700 replies from her to him in may you cannot miss it.

External Link/Members Only

[Cuntminion]

I don’t think it invalidates the review but I think for punters who haven’t seen the build up on Uke it’s important to place it in context.

It seems though that you issue is personal because what you’re really saying here is that you wouldn’t trust Coma to have the integrity to give a negative if it was deserved.

It's absolutely personal

Just some way for Sam to have a pop

What he is fundamentally suggesting is what your implying

Which is fine it's his opinion, everyone is entitled to one

It's pointless arguing the toss it's tantamount to pissing in the wind on my part

[Cuntminion]

It's not one it is 700 replies from her to him in may you cannot miss it.

External Link/Members Only

It's funny your having a pop, maybe your a bit hurt after I asked you to stop pming me about Sam 

[vw]

I don’t think it invalidates the review but I think for punters who haven’t seen the build up on Uke it’s important to place it in context.

It seems though that you issue is personal because what you’re really saying here is that you wouldn’t trust Coma to have the integrity to give a negative if it was deserved.

Coma has history as a former banned white knight and history of hiding negative reviews like when his favourite chloe texted while in reverse oral.

Things like that added to the flirting will colour people's opinion if the review.

[vw]

It's funny your having a pop, maybe your a bit hurt after I asked you to stop pming me about Sam 

Hardly you are just irked after I said what the forum was thinking about you and Kelly.    Thank fuck it has slowed down since then success. 

[Cuntminion]

Hardly you are just irked after I said what the forum was thinking about you and Kelly.  Thank fuck it has slowed down since then success.

You are the only person I've ever had to tell to literally stop pming me to cunt of others as I don't want no part in it
And if Sam wants his welcome to the info as I find your individual duplicity astounding

At least my opinion of someone however appreciated is honest and consistent

Which makes yours and Sam's Waldorf and Statler double act here more laughable. As it's daggers behind the scenes

I know exactly why I am getting stick off both of you but there is literally no point

As for the reviews, no I'm not doing this back and forth every time

Unless a booking showed clear and imment danger to anyone else , no more reviews from me

I'm not doing this dance every time

[OutForJustice80]

Coma has history as a former banned white knight and history of hiding negative reviews like when his favourite chloe texted while in reverse oral.

Things like that added to the flirting will colour people's opinion if the review.

The reviewer colours what people think of the review regardless of who it is. Well, it does for me anyway.