Author Topic: You know you're a punter when... (Read 440546 times)

Bogof60 · « **Reply #800 on:** April 21, 2018, 05:43:47 pm »

must say that tickled me as well

Dipper · « **Reply #801 on:** April 21, 2018, 06:50:23 pm »

You imagine the quality of DFK with total strangers.

Drekszter · « **Reply #802 on:** April 21, 2018, 10:18:50 pm »

When you can automatically get an idea for a random, attractive girl's max hourly rate if she ever became a WG

When you already know a civvy's dress, waist size etc within mins of glancing at them/seeing a pic

When you can tell what an EE look is

webpunter · « **Reply #803 on:** April 22, 2018, 12:53:01 am »

When you can spot the EE hookers going home @ the airport [with piles of ££] in an instant

Matrix2718 · « **Reply #804 on:** April 27, 2018, 09:21:54 pm »

When you see this on the back of a bus and it makes you think of something totally different to what’s being advertised

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Cum_again · « **Reply #805 on:** April 27, 2018, 10:51:53 pm »

You know when you’re a Punter when you drive past a house called Victoria house every day on your way to work....

And every day you see it you wonder what girls might be working..

Plan R · « **Reply #806 on:** April 27, 2018, 11:21:53 pm »

Quote from: Al947 on April 27, 2018, 09:21:54 pm

When you see this on the back of a bus and it makes you think of something totally different to what’s being advertised
Hidden Image/Members Only

LLPunting · « **Reply #807 on:** April 28, 2018, 12:33:01 am »

1) You review your location history on your phone (before deleting it) and realise you've spent an awful lot of time in places where you have no "real life" reason to be.

2) You hear someone mention "Chelsea" and you immediately think "Cloisters"

3) You hear someone say "SIM card" and you lose focus for a moment

4) You hear someone mention Brazilian and you think "+20 for OWO"

5) You're asked to suggest a good place to eat Thai and you can only think to say "Bayswater"

6) You see mangoes in the supermarket and feel the need to wail like Tarzan

7) You realise your punting phone is on a more expensive talk plan than your "real" phone

8) You pick up your punting phone by reflex when you need to make a phone call

9) You realise that you've shagged more WGs in the past month than "real" women in the past year

10) You see your bank statement and you see that you're regularly withdrawing £60, £100, £120 or £150 from ATMs

11) You see or hear "ATM" in your everyday life and wonder how much extra that would cost

12) You find yourself calling your friends on the phone once you arrive outside their homes

mh · « **Reply #808 on:** April 28, 2018, 09:21:08 am »

Quote from: Al947 on April 27, 2018, 09:21:54 pm

When you see this on the back of a bus and it makes you think of something totally different to what’s being advertised

Hidden Image/Members Only

I could be tempted to become a teacher. Looking forward to the practicals...

webpunter · « **Reply #809 on:** April 28, 2018, 10:11:20 am »

Quality observations

Quote from: LLPunting on April 28, 2018, 12:33:01 am

1) You review your location history on your phone (before deleting it) and realise you've spent an awful lot of time in places where you have no "real life" reason to be.

2) You hear someone mention "Chelsea" and you immediately think "Cloisters" & then think next time i go there i'll try & avoid getting lost in the rabbit warren

3) You hear someone say "SIM card" and you lose focus for a moment

4) You hear someone mention Brazilian and you think "+20 for OWO"

5) You're asked to suggest a good place to eat Thai and you can only think to say "Bayswater"

6) You see mangoes in the supermarket and feel the need to wail like Tarzan

7) You realise your punting phone is on a more expensive talk plan than your "real" phone

8) You pick up your punting phone by reflex when you need to make a phone call

9) You realise that you've shagged more WGs in the past month than "real" women in the past year

10) You see your bank statement and you see that you're regularly withdrawing £60, £100, £120 or £150 from ATMs

11) You see or hear "ATM" in your everyday life and wonder how much extra that would cost

12) You find yourself calling your friends on the phone once you arrive outside their homes

webpunter · « **Reply #810 on:** April 28, 2018, 10:14:42 am »

When its reported that the Royals are on their ski-ing hols @ Kloisters, i think of the gaff in Chelsea referred to above

normal bloke · « **Reply #811 on:** April 28, 2018, 10:16:32 am »

At the next bank counter you hear/ see a couple of young girls paying in tons of cash into their account. Give them the once over and try to work out if you've seen their profile anywhere.

CheeseBoard · « **Reply #812 on:** April 28, 2018, 10:25:55 am »

There is new starter at work who started last week. Timid ratty looking fellow. Looked at the name plate on his desk and initials are HP. Thought to myself that’s not how I imagined HP to be

Horizontal pleasures · « **Reply #813 on:** May 03, 2018, 01:36:19 pm »

when... someone nominates you for vice-chair of a committee and you think twice about accepting, no thanks.

Horizontal pleasures · « **Reply #814 on:** May 03, 2018, 01:38:37 pm »

Your son buys his first ever car. What did he buy? An Escort!

Bogof60 · « **Reply #815 on:** May 03, 2018, 04:21:57 pm »

when you check the cash in your wallet and the first thing that you think of is
That will buy an hour with... Insert favourite prozzy name here.....

Dipper · « **Reply #816 on:** May 03, 2018, 05:17:18 pm »

Quote from: LLPunting on April 28, 2018, 12:33:01 am

1) You review your location history on your phone (before deleting it) and realise you've spent an awful lot of time in places where you have no "real life" reason to be.

2) You hear someone mention "Chelsea" and you immediately think "Cloisters"

3) You hear someone say "SIM card" and you lose focus for a moment

4) You hear someone mention Brazilian and you think "+20 for OWO"

5) You're asked to suggest a good place to eat Thai and you can only think to say "Bayswater"

6) You see mangoes in the supermarket and feel the need to wail like Tarzan

7) You realise your punting phone is on a more expensive talk plan than your "real" phone

8) You pick up your punting phone by reflex when you need to make a phone call

9) You realise that you've shagged more WGs in the past month than "real" women in the past year

10) You see your bank statement and you see that you're regularly withdrawing £60, £100, £120 or £150 from ATMs

11) You see or hear "ATM" in your everyday life and wonder how much extra that would cost

12) You find yourself calling your friends on the phone once you arrive outside their homes

Very good, especially 12.

Whoisarrypotter · « **Reply #817 on:** May 03, 2018, 07:55:49 pm »

Just been sent to someone's house to pick up something funnily enough it is across the road from a wgs flat.
But am currently sitting in my car waiting for someone to tell me I can come to the door. Cant help but feel like a punter right now, I wonder if she will be stood behind the door when she opens it.
I must remember not to open with hello gorgeous.

Zedster · « **Reply #818 on:** May 03, 2018, 10:21:26 pm »

When a lass tells you her age and you automatically add 5

webpunter · « **Reply #819 on:** May 05, 2018, 08:36:11 am »

Between 5 & 10

Quote from: Zedster on May 03, 2018, 10:21:26 pm

When a lass tells you her age and you automatically add 5

JonasG · « **Reply #820 on:** May 08, 2018, 09:37:13 am »

Heard on the radio this morning about the end of wet wipes or something lol.

Immediately thought of whores.

RAJEC · « **Reply #821 on:** May 08, 2018, 09:57:17 am »

Quote from: JonasG on May 08, 2018, 09:37:13 am

Heard on the radio this morning about the end of wet wipes or something lol.

Immediately thought of whores.

Avg_Joe · « **Reply #822 on:** May 08, 2018, 10:42:14 am »

Quote from: JonasG on May 08, 2018, 09:37:13 am

Heard on the radio this morning about the end of wet wipes or something lol.

Immediately thought of whores.

or when you see a girl being overly aggressive when using a wet wipe.... and you immediately think "i know what you do in your spare time"

DastardlyDick · « **Reply #823 on:** May 08, 2018, 11:30:07 am »

You have the local GUM clinic's number on speed dial on your punting phone and you know the early symptoms of common STIs.

Horizontal pleasures · « **Reply #824 on:** May 08, 2018, 04:36:49 pm »

Scanning the clothes in a mail order catalogue there are some 'ultimate chinos' that are water, oil and stain resistant.

haha
Punting trousers.

webpunter · « **Reply #825 on:** May 08, 2018, 05:21:11 pm »

I had you down as being attired in plus fours

Quote from: Horizontal pleasures on May 08, 2018, 04:36:49 pm

Scanning the clothes in a mail order catalogue there are some 'ultimate chinos' that are water, oil and stain resistant.

haha
Punting trousers.

Just jestin'

LLPunting · « **Reply #826 on:** May 09, 2018, 03:00:38 am »

'nuff said

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magnetico · « **Reply #827 on:** May 09, 2018, 08:50:22 am »

Quote from: LLPunting on May 09, 2018, 03:00:38 am

'nuff said

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Avg_Joe · « **Reply #828 on:** May 10, 2018, 11:31:04 am »

Cumberland · « **Reply #829 on:** May 10, 2018, 07:04:09 pm »

If every time you see a hot looking girl wearing glasses you just automatically assume she’s on her way to a Bukkake session.
Next thought is a mental image of her face covered in spunk.

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webpunter · « **Reply #830 on:** May 10, 2018, 08:27:48 pm »

KT will be bashing furiously

Quote from: LLPunting on May 09, 2018, 03:00:38 am

'nuff said

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MrMatrix · « **Reply #831 on:** May 10, 2018, 10:41:11 pm »

Quote from: webpunter on May 10, 2018, 08:27:48 pm

KT will be bashing furiously

Very good Webpunter.

webpunter · « **Reply #832 on:** May 10, 2018, 10:45:44 pm »

Thanks matey

Quote from: MrMatrix on May 10, 2018, 10:41:11 pm

Very good Webpunter.

mrpeterman · « **Reply #833 on:** May 13, 2018, 01:16:06 pm »

Sure covered but when driving home you remenise of various pints you have had near to the route your driving.

m4rmite · « **Reply #834 on:** May 13, 2018, 08:25:50 pm »

when you see CIM on an number plate you have a sly giggle..

Steely Dan · « **Reply #835 on:** May 13, 2018, 09:02:26 pm »

When you see a girl 15 years younger than you, and medium attractive, and you think, 'no chance girly, I only fuck younger and better looking'.

Whoisarrypotter · « **Reply #836 on:** May 13, 2018, 10:38:17 pm »

Quote from: Steely Dan on May 13, 2018, 09:02:26 pm

When you see a girl 15 years younger than you, and medium attractive, and you think, 'no chance girly, I only fuck younger and better looking'.

Fuck me I'm glad I ain't 30 then as that would be soooooo wrong

Vorteghan · « **Reply #837 on:** May 13, 2018, 10:46:21 pm »

Queuing to check in at a hotel reception and passing the time admiring the two hot young ladies ahead of you. Then wondering if they are 'on tour' at the hotel for a few days.

Avg_Joe · « **Reply #838 on:** May 14, 2018, 11:13:07 am »

Quote from: Vorteghan on May 13, 2018, 10:46:21 pm

Queuing to check in at a hotel reception and passing the time admiring the two hot young ladies ahead of you. Then wondering if they are 'on tour' at the hotel for a few days.

snap!

Horizontal pleasures · « **Reply #839 on:** May 14, 2018, 08:22:34 pm »

you read this book title on line ....
Warum wir dick werden: Und was wir dagegen tun können (German Edition)

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Ali Katt · « **Reply #840 on:** May 14, 2018, 08:34:36 pm »

Paying money in at a post office or bank and it reminds you of paying a WG.

Avg_Joe · « **Reply #841 on:** May 16, 2018, 09:22:40 am »

A £100 lottery scratch card win results in you immediately thinking...... 'cool, untraceable cash for a cheeky punt' !!

anonyorks · « **Reply #842 on:** May 16, 2018, 11:41:07 am »

When you insist you can run an errand at work even though they don't understand as it is miles out of your way so you can arrange a punt.

Horizontal pleasures · « **Reply #843 on:** May 16, 2018, 02:41:41 pm »

You get paid for your own work in £50 notes and you realise you can pay for a punt without a bulging wallet. Happened to me this week.

Horizontal pleasures · « **Reply #844 on:** May 16, 2018, 02:47:03 pm »

when .... you can start a thread on here and watch the replies drifting in.

Horizontal pleasures · « **Reply #845 on:** May 22, 2018, 06:58:17 pm »

when ... the missus refers to the woman's voice on the satnav as 'your dominatrix'.

webpunter · « **Reply #846 on:** May 22, 2018, 07:02:09 pm »

When you see a certain type of burd on the beach and think ........... HP would have a go at that

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Just jestin'. As always respec

Cumberland · « **Reply #847 on:** May 22, 2018, 07:38:07 pm »

When like me you want to quit your job as it involves too much travel away from home, but you don’t do that because without it you wouldn’t have the cover to punt. So you know you’re a punter when....your chosen career is engineered to enable punting and everything else is secondary.

mrpeterman · « **Reply #848 on:** May 22, 2018, 08:07:28 pm »

You become ever more creative in your company expenses to clear cost of a punt...

notcalledchris · « **Reply #849 on:** May 22, 2018, 11:19:35 pm »

Quote from: mrpeterman on May 22, 2018, 08:07:28 pm

You become ever more creative in your company expenses to clear cost of a punt...

You fit early morning business meetings to allow you to arrive in a different city the night before so you can check into a hotel and bang an outcall whore before falling asleep.

Author Topic: You know you're a punter when... (Read 440546 times)

Zedster

mrpeterman

mrpeterman

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