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Author Topic: The worst escort picture challenge  (Read 866609 times)

Offline Ali Katt

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Well she is from Merthyr the Dole capital of Britain and where the average life expectancy in some parts is just 50 (not joking) so that may well be her actual age...
Merthyr Tydfil = Meffer Titsfell in her case.

Offline covertlook

JUST TURNED 30????

What's the exchange rate from real years to prossie years these days??

30 STONE

bristolqwerty

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 :( If I mistakenly arrived for a punt I'd be up that loft hatch in a second and wont be coming down unless she left.  :cry:
Jesus Christ  :scare:
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Chuckman

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Just out of shot are the orbiting stars.


raylondoner

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:( If I mistakenly arrived for a punt I'd be up that loft hatch in a second and wont be coming down unless she left.  :cry:
Jesus Christ  :scare:
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At least you'd know she couldn't follow you!  :hi:


bristolqwerty

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Where do you start with foreplay?  I always booked what I thought were attractive ladies with great bodies and loved to kiss them all over, you could probably pop your todger inbetween her belly/back/knee folds, her sweat being the lube.  :vomit:
One day they're be a scenario when it's just you and her and you have to repopulate the earth.  :cry:
« Last Edit: January 17, 2016, 08:47:31 pm by bristolqwerty »

bristolqwerty

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I'm a huge stockings fan and find images like this upsetting.
Classic website quote  "Chances are you are not going to want to put me down"   :scare:
She must be popular though as she has one hell of a professional website.
« Last Edit: January 17, 2016, 09:06:20 pm by bristolqwerty »

bristolqwerty

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Quote
Dinner date: Up to 4 hours (2 hours private) ..... £550
Bollocks am I'm picking up the tab for a dinner date either  :angry: unless its an all you an eat buffet   :)

bristolqwerty

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Shame the lorry wasn't doing 60mph at the time.  :angry:
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or maybe it was .......    :scare:
« Last Edit: January 17, 2016, 09:31:53 pm by bristolqwerty »

Offline Ali Katt

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I'm a huge stockings fan and find images like this upsetting.
Classic website quote  "Chances are you are not going to want to put me down"   :scare:
She must be popular though as she has one hell of a professional website.
Small tits for a fat bird.

bristolqwerty

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Offline Horizontal pleasures

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I'm a huge stockings fan and find images like this upsetting.
Classic website quote  "Chances are you are not going to want to put me down"   :scare:
She must be popular though as she has one hell of a professional website.
You write "I'm a huge stockings fan "
That's OK then as I am sure that she has huge stockings.

Offline Poopster


Classic website quote  "Chances are you are not going to want to put me down" 

We'd need to be able to lift you first princess, let's not get ahead of ourselves!

Offline Horizontal pleasures

« Last Edit: January 17, 2016, 10:46:42 pm by Horizontal pleasures »

bristolqwerty

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 :D 0 reviews and her idea of a perfect date is lunch or dinner or both  :)

Yeboahsleftfoot

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Fuck me Keith Chegwin has let himself go!
At least you'd know she couldn't follow you!  :hi:



Offline wannabe

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Serial killer?
[/quote

Well there have been a lot of bad pictures in this thread (and I've not read anywhere near the whole thing), but this one just might be the winner imho - it's certainly the scariest!

Offline Iloveoral

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T.S,suppose A.W is for all tastes.

That's not a ts, that's just a bloke in a wig with lipstick haha I bet his mum is proud  :D

Offline Poopster


Well there have been a lot of bad pictures in this thread (and I've not read anywhere near the whole thing), but this one just might be the winner imho - it's certainly the scariest!

Look deeper young padawan, that's not even close to the top of the tree!



bristolqwerty

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FootieMadJonny

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I'm a huge stockings fan and find images like this upsetting.
Classic website quote  "Chances are you are not going to want to put me down"   :scare:
She must be popular though as she has one hell of a professional website.
I posted about this girl. Gorgeous body and the stockings and lingerie look very sexy too! :thumbsup:

Why do you find the image upsetting?

Offline punk

Looks more like a beached whale or football with legs.

Offline Iloveoral

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I've fucked worst to be honest, she looks like a local wg that's £30 half hour, if an emergency sack unloading is required I guess

Offline mh

Just found this

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I saw something very like that when I once worked on a farm when I was a student. Around calving time.

Offline Longlife

I think she looks sexy and would certainly see her.

bristolqwerty

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I posted about this girl. Gorgeous body and the stockings and lingerie look very sexy too! :thumbsup:

Why do you find the image upsetting?

 :angry: you are taking the piss  :dash:

Offline Iloveoral

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That ass would take a good pounding!!

Even a big girl needs some loving haha

Offline webpunter

Here's a big old unit for HP  :D   External Link/Members Only
External Link/Members Only   Can some tech-savvy UKP'er wazz up a pic for his benefit

Offline Poopster

:angry: you are taking the piss  :dash:

Maybe he thinks this is National Geographic, not a hooring forum.

Offline Poopster

Here's a big old unit for HP  :D   External Link/Members Only
External Link/Members Only   Can some tech-savvy UKP'er wazz up a pic for his benefit

90 bucks for half an hour??  Really?  I won't lie, I've been partial to the odd "BBW" in my time, but nothing so big as her.  That's just not sexy. 

I get the old horses for courses adage, everyone likes different things, but why would you pay to fuck a woman who must be really quite immobile and... sweaty... and icky.  I don't get it.

Offline webpunter

I've been partial to the odd "BBW" in my time
I've had a couple of civvie birds verging on BBW status.  When the evening is drawing to a close.  And its either go for a size 14 or go home & knock-one-out.  Not the type to take out for a stroll down the high street & lunch the next day.  However the shagging has been monumental.  Lights definitely off.  Just had to make sure my mates didn't find out  :sarcastic:

Offline od13218

90 bucks for half an hour??  Really?  I won't lie, I've been partial to the odd "BBW" in my time, but nothing so big as her.  That's just not sexy. 

I get the old horses for courses adage, everyone likes different things, but why would you pay to fuck a woman who must be really quite immobile and... sweaty... and icky.  I don't get it.
Well I don't get why anyone would fuck a woman who's borderline anorexic with nothing to hang on to- but lots of guys do and I respect that. Tastes vary enormously and the fact that girls of all shapes and sizes are in business is testimony to that!
Doug

Offline Horizontal pleasures

Here's a big old unit for HP  :D   External Link/Members Only
External Link/Members Only   Can some tech-savvy UKP'er wazz up a pic for his benefit

thanks a bunch

Offline Horizontal pleasures

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fortunately for those who are eating their dinner the photos are small.

I just figured it out as I went to see her. I have seen her before and she had another name:
https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=57136.0

so do I add to that old review or do a new one?

FootieMadJonny

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:angry: you are taking the piss  :dash:
Not at all? Why would you think that? I love large girls and I find her very beautiful  :thumbsup:

Offline od13218

:angry: you are taking the piss  :dash:
If you don't share someone's tastes, I get that- but why get angry about it? Live and let live- or fuck and let fuck!

Offline Ali Katt

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Well I don't get why anyone would fuck a woman who's borderline anorexic with nothing to hang on to- but lots of guys do and I respect that. Tastes vary enormously and the fact that girls of all shapes and sizes are in business is testimony to that!
Doug
Despite what people say, mainly the prossies themselves the most popular girls are never the BBWs, most reviews on here are for women of average or slim body types and usually younger than 40. The myth that the grannies are booked up for months is a lie, as is the BBWs have so many booking they turn them away. There are exceptions, known pornstar Grandma Libby is probably very busy as are the incredibly large women as there is a fetish market, I'm not talking size 16, I'm talking size 24+.

Offline Ali Katt

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Not at all? Why would you think that? I love large girls and I find her very beautiful  :thumbsup:
Small tits for a fat bird. In my opinion the fat ones are only worth seeing if they have a bit up front.

bristolqwerty

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If you don't share someone's tastes, I get that- but why get angry about it? Live and let live- or fuck and let fuck!

 :hi:  Fair point, to be fair I was more  :cry: than angry.  Seeing a pair of stockings filled with what looks like the contents of a KFC bargain bucket brings tears to my eyes.
« Last Edit: January 20, 2016, 07:24:53 pm by bristolqwerty »

bristolqwerty

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Apologies if you are about to eat  :thumbsdown: - how is this, in anyway meant to entice me to pick up the phone and call?
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« Last Edit: January 20, 2016, 09:02:28 pm by bristolqwerty »

Offline Ali Katt

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First picture looks like it was taken in the Job Centre:
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bristolqwerty

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Offline Iloveoral

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Apologies if you are about to eat  :thumbsdown: - how is this, in anyway meant to entice me to pick up the phone and call?
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Wtf?  :vomit:

She's got her arm up some blokes back door? I turned a dildo down yesterday because I thought it would her lol