I got caught cheating, now what?

[Chazz]

I had a shiver go through me when one civvy asked me if i thought there was a menu 

 

Did she ask you why you'd just left a wad of £20s on the side too? 

[PumpDump]

How does Beverly Hills come into the equation ?

  Attention to detail is not my strong point.

[webpunter]

Did she ask you why you'd just left a wad of £20s on the side too? 

Quality 
At least there weren't any wet wipes in play, phew TFFT

[daviemac]

No, I simply don't get offended by words written by some anonymous guy on the internet. I fail to see how someone could be offended.

No, my message was aimed to cueball. 90125 didn't say anything about being offended that I can see. Why would you bring that up?

Seems like you are trying to bait me in to criticising a mod's decision here, which could be a banning offence.

You really can't be that stupid, you tell Cueball to grow up because he agreed that calling members losers, he was agreeing with 90125 who found it offensive enough to put it as the banning reason. Therefore it stands to reason if Cueball needs to grow up then according to your theory 90125 needs to as well.

Banned reason: Calling members losers.
Banned by: 90125

Nobody needs to bait you into criticising mods, you manage that quite well of your own volition.

BTW the banning reason is the main reason for the ban.

[puntingking]

Oh booo hooo, you are offended. FFS grow up. Frankly, you are a loser if you pay for sex. And I am a loser too!

i don't regard myself as a loser 


according to Cambridge dictionary, a loser is a person who is always unsuccessful at everything they do.

[PumpDump]

You really can't be that stupid, you tell Cueball to grow up because he agreed that calling members losers, he was agreeing with 90215 who found it offensive enough to put it as the banning reason. Therefore it stands to reason if Cueball needs to grow up then according to your theory 90125 needs to as well.

Banned reason: Calling members losers.
Banned by: 90125

Nobody needs to bait you into criticising mods, you manage that quite well of your own volition.

BTW the banning reason is the main reason for the ban.

How do you know 90215 was offended? Did you ask him? He never said he was offended, so how then could Cueball agree with him? Seems to me that 90215 thought rule 23 was broken so banned PaulRuff.

But maybe 90125 would like to speak for himself instead of you or I assuming how he felt.

[puntingking]

Have to agree with you.

I pay for sex but this alone does not make me a loser, not at all.
His sweeping statement says more about him than it does about anyone else.

I'm very happy in life & just happen to be absolutely hopeless with females & therefore, happy to pay for my occasional 'needs'

this makes you a winner 

[PumpDump]

i don't regard myself as a loser 


according to Cambridge dictionary, a loser is a person who is always unsuccessful at everything they do.

That's a relief then. I am just a loser at convincing multiple women per month to fuck me no strings attached. I'm even less offended now 

[versace]

That's a relief then. I am just a loser at convincing multiple women per month to fuck me no strings attached. I'm even less offended now 

You just have a loser’s mindset and women can sense that, hence why nobody wants to fuck you. Change your mindset.

[Blackpool Rock]

How do you know 90215 was offended? Did you ask him? He never said he was offended, so how then could Cueball agree with him? Seems to me that 90215 thought rule 23 was broken so banned PaulRuff.

But maybe 90125 would like to speak for himself instead of you or I assuming how he felt.

Fuck me mate you never fail to do yourself no favours whatsoever do you 

There's an empty house round here somewhere, how about moving in so you can kick off a good argument 

[puntingking]

Fuck me mate you never fail to do yourself no favours whatsoever do you 

There's an empty house round here somewhere, how about moving in so you can kick off a good argument 

Your from blackpool, I imagine the whole place is full of empty houses 

Just a joke, Im sure Blackpool a lovely place to live.

[daviemac]

How do you know 90215 was offended? Did you ask him? He never said he was offended, so how then could Cueball agree with him? Seems to me that 90215 thought rule 23 was broken so banned PaulRuff.

But maybe 90125 would like to speak for himself instead of you or I assuming how he felt.

Stop pushing it, it won't end well for you.

All is not what it seems so you would be very foolish to make any assumptions.

[versace]

Your from blackpool, I imagine the whole place is full of empty houses 

Just a joke, Im sure Blackpool a lovely place to live.

Not a bad idea this. He could move in to BR’s shed maybe. I would even suggest that Blackpool Rock should take him under his wing and teach him a few life lessons that he is lacking and desperately in need of.

[Blackpool Rock]

Your from blackpool, I imagine the whole place is full of empty houses 

Just a joke, Im sure Blackpool a lovely place to live.

It's mainly full of shitty guest houses etc full of DSS and the shittier old Britannia hotels did have asylum seekers in them at one point though not sure if that's still the case.

I always refer to Blackpool as a shit hole though everywhere has good areas and bad areas I guess, i'm not sure it's as bad as I make out and for one of the most deprived areas of the country with the worst health expectancy in the country i'd still rather live here than some other places which have issues with gangs and knife / gun crime

[Blackpool Rock]

Not a bad idea this. He could move in to BR’s shed maybe. I would even suggest that Blackpool Rock should take him under his wing and teach him a few life lessons that he is lacking and desperately in need of.

Thanks mate 

[Thephoenix]

Oh booo hooo, you are offended. FFS grow up. Frankly, you are a loser if you pay for sex. And I am a loser too!

What a silly thing to say.
Age and I'll health may soon result in me being unable to pay for sex.
Maybe then I might be a 'loser' for missing out on all the fun.

[Thephoenix]

It's mainly full of shitty guest houses etc full of DSS and the shittier old Britannia hotels did have asylum seekers in them at one point though not sure if that's still the case.

I always refer to Blackpool as a shit hole though everywhere has good areas and bad areas I guess, i'm not sure it's as bad as I make out and for one of the most deprived areas of the country with the worst health expectancy in the country i'd still rather live here than some other places which have issues with gangs and knife / gun crime

Not as good as it used to be, but still has  plenty of great attractions and lots and lots of the world famous Blackpool Rock.


Hidden Image/Members Only

.......Any relation?

[Blackpool Rock]

Not as good as it used to be, but still has  plenty of great attractions and lots and lots of the world famous Blackpool Rock.


Hidden Image/Members Only

.......Any relation?

Auntie Doris 

[wristjob]

Unless i'm mistaken you pay them to leave, even metaphorically speaking when on an incall

Women love to vent about trivial stuff that could be resolved in minutes - and some of them can drag out these sob stories for days and weeks. I pay to not have to listen to that or really care.

[webpunter]

Women love to vent about trivial stuff that could be resolved in minutes - and some of them can drag out these sob stories for days and weeks. I pay to not have to listen to that or really care.

Days & weeks 
Don't be silly .... it can extend to years

Hidden Image/Members Only

[Blackpool Rock]

Days & weeks 
Don't be silly .... it can extend to years

Hidden Image/Members Only

I know someone who held onto a specific incident for about 20 years until they were able to get "Payback"
I remember her telling me or rather gloating about how she's held onto that for over 20 years but I knew that one day i'd be able to use it to my advantage 

[Heph]

You just have a loser’s mindset and women can sense that, hence why nobody wants to fuck you. Change your mindset.

 < Tate Bros have joined the chat >

[hairdownthere]

Oh booo hooo, you are offended. FFS grow up. Frankly, you are a loser if you pay for sex. And I am a loser too!

I pay for sex because I can't be bothered with all the crap that goes along with dating.  Take a lass out, dinner, drinks no change out of a ton, not guaranteed to get a kiss never mind a ride. 

So I chose to pay to have sex with a woman that I'm attracted to, of various nationalities and body types, arrange with minimum of fuss, at a time that suits me, and don't have to listen to hours of crap* in the hope I'll have sex with them.  2 hours out of my day vs days of back and forth messages and calls and full night potentially wasted.

Does that make me a loser?

*I currently see an SP as a regular though she doesn't charge me any more, we go for coffee, lunch etc and have a good fumble afterwards.  I also see a civvie (who I met in Tesco of all places) who I'll go for coffee, lunch etc with and have a good fumble afterwards.  I enjoy the company of both of them though if I had to chase them, I wouldn't.

[maybe]

I pay for sex because I can't be bothered with all the crap that goes along with dating.  Take a lass out, dinner, drinks no change out of a ton, not guaranteed to get a kiss never mind a ride. 

So I chose to pay to have sex with a woman that I'm attracted to, of various nationalities and body types, arrange with minimum of fuss, at a time that suits me, and don't have to listen to hours of crap* in the hope I'll have sex with them.  2 hours out of my day vs days of back and forth messages and calls and full night potentially wasted.

Does that make me a loser?

*I currently see an SP as a regular though she doesn't charge me any more, we go for coffee, lunch etc and have a good fumble afterwards.  I also see a civvie (who I met in Tesco of all places) who I'll go for coffee, lunch etc with and have a good fumble afterwards.  I enjoy the company of both of them though if I had to chase them, I wouldn't.

Dating is strange now days, and this sums it up. Some of the stories from my single mates and the hoops and troubles they have dating are unbelievable. I'm sort of glad i'm not young in this generation, I'd think i'd be single for sure.

[cueball]

Oh booo hooo, you are offended. FFS grow up. Frankly, you are a loser if you pay for sex. And I am a loser too!

Grow up? I've not had that said for a long time 

And yes, it's offensive, it's the dummy spitting statements of the real losers. It's like a "I'm taking my ball home"

The paid sex thing, most of us don't pay for the sex, we pay to walk away after.

It's not a winner or a loser scenario, if you think you're a loser because you pay for sex then maybe the paid sex game isn't for you

[maybe]

The paid sex thing, most of us don't pay for the sex, we pay to walk away after.

110% agree with this statement. Don't get attached or have a mistress, total recipe for disaster if you have another half.

[Belgarion]

Grow up? I've not had that said for a long time 

And yes, it's offensive, it's the dummy spitting statements of the real losers. It's like a "I'm taking my ball home"

The paid sex thing, most of us don't pay for the sex, we pay to walk away after.

It's not a winner or a loser scenario, if you think you're a loser because you pay for sex then maybe the paid sex game isn't for you

It's always the ones that hate themselves that make comments like that.

I pay for sex, it is liberating and uncomplicated and works perfectly for me.

[Fuzzyduck]

It's always the ones that hate themselves that make comments like that.

I pay for sex, it is liberating and uncomplicated and works perfectly for me.

Hear hear. When you're balls deep in doggy with fingers in her ass, how can you not feel like a winner in life?

[RedditchJay]

Well   its a hard call

When the wife and I had bedroom issues we tried swinging for a couple of years {approx 10yrs ago} -  watching initially and then some light playing, we did a full swap once and she wasnt keen to repeat, watching and shagging next to coiuples got us very horny and worked wonders in the bedroom for a few of years.

Now its a bit flat again {menopause etc}  my wife encourages me to go for a "massage", she has no issue with me having a massage and HE, she doesnt know about the FS occasionally but I am more of a massage and HE nowadays {over 60 and struggle if you know what i mean} 25yrs together and talk about what we both need and want etc etc - works for us

[dubs]

Say you only went with TS girls because you crave girlcock, and if she gets upset, accuse her of being transphobic and anti-woke. 

[webpunter]

Well   its a hard call

When the wife and I had bedroom issues we tried swinging for a couple of years {approx 10yrs ago} -  watching initially and then some light playing, we did a full swap once and she wasnt keen to repeat, watching and shagging next to coiuples got us very horny and worked wonders in the bedroom for a few of years.

Now its a bit flat again {menopause etc}  my wife encourages me to go for a "massage", she has no issue with me having a massage and HE, she doesnt know about the FS occasionally but I am more of a massage and HE nowadays {over 60 and struggle if you know what i mean} 25yrs together and talk about what we both need and want etc etc - works for us

A good set up with your OHs approach
Encouraging you crikey, that is going some
I reck more the case that wifeys choose to ignore it when hubby heads out, as long as its not made obvious [off to B&Q darling ...]
Gets you out of the house she gets to do whatever wimin do & leads to a harmonious house & relationship me thinks

I'm behind you age wise, tho am on the same page re HE rather than FS
Rocking up quick BJ nodder on & a brief shag does nowt for me & near impossible to shoot, especially if the nodder is the grip of death
Too much effort & i much prefer a skilled HJ oilyTW

Indeed best keep FS [if the opportunity & mood strikes] well below the radar
& if off to the chinese make sure you dont have a pubic hair between your teeth when you return home    [even worse stuck in back of froat] 

[meptalon]

The marriage won’t be the same anymore… she will never trust you again. If you have any assets, my first advice is to seek an accountant as soon as possible.

This. She will never "forget". She is only tolerating now, most likely because she doesn't want to lose the resources associated to you.

[lillythesavage]

It's always the ones that hate themselves that make comments like that.

I pay for sex, it is liberating and uncomplicated and works perfectly for me.

Very true is that, and it is those that hate themselves for paying for sex that cause the most problems for the SP and have more chance of a poor punt.

[lillythesavage]

Well   its a hard call

When the wife and I had bedroom issues we tried swinging for a couple of years {approx 10yrs ago} -  watching initially and then some light playing, we did a full swap once and she wasnt keen to repeat, watching and shagging next to coiuples got us very horny and worked wonders in the bedroom for a few of years.

Now its a bit flat again {menopause etc}  my wife encourages me to go for a "massage", she has no issue with me having a massage and HE, she doesnt know about the FS occasionally but I am more of a massage and HE nowadays {over 60 and struggle if you know what i mean} 25yrs together and talk about what we both need and want etc etc - works for us

I went down a similar road with swinging etc, the insane jealousy and " Til death do us part " attitude, along with detective skills to beat the current bunch of Met Detectives  , meant the compromise you have was never going to happen.

Communication and understanding plays a big part, I failed, you have not, by understanding I mean, a ticking body clock, childbirth, rearing children, menopause, mean life is very different for women.
I often read on here, it is YOUR assets that keep you together, women marry for money and security,Life is set up for the male to be the breadwinner, but it takes two to rear a family and build a home  , the female is the one with an interrupted career, or stay at home mum, forgotten by those with mysogonistic tendencies 

On a side note, over 60 is not old these days, currently, after 10 years alone save a few FWB things, in a very strong healthy and fun relationship with a 34 year old. Who was told from the start, I have been paying for sex, and monogamy is not part of the deal. 

[lillythesavage]

This. She will never "forget". She is only tolerating now, most likely because she doesn't want to lose the resources associated to you.

Spoken from what experience ? 

[kingmg]

In the most stupid way my wife found out that I was unfaithful to her (I won't go into details but basically I  was always been very careful but stupidly the routine made me trust and I let my guard down with my punting phone)

We had a good relationship (basically the only problem is the dead bedroom) she is really my friend and I feel like shit when all this happened, she was heartbroken but at the end she forgive me, only with the condition I won't do it again

Honestly I may be OK for a few months but I think at the end I will be back to punting.

All this happened so recently, she keeps asking me all the details of what I did. I don't think I feel ok sharing it but it feels she really wanted to know everything and have answers.

Honestly  :angelgirl:I would love to tell her to accept me like this and to just have a blind eye on these adventures but I'm pretty sure this won't go well. so I'm scratching my head in how to deal with this. If keep it secret again or just face an inevitable divorce.

I would really appreciate any advice of someone who has been through a similar experience.

tell her it's a friend's phone and you were returning it

[webpunter]

I went down a similar road with swinging etc, the insane jealousy and " Til death do us part " attitude, along with detective skills to beat the current bunch of Met Detectives  , meant the compromise you have was never going to happen.

Communication and understanding plays a big part, I failed, you have not, by understanding I mean, a ticking body clock, childbirth, rearing children, menopause, mean life is very different for women.
I often read on here, it is YOUR assets that keep you together, women marry for money and security,Life is set up for the male to be the breadwinner, but it takes two to rear a family and build a home  , the female is the one with an interrupted career, or stay at home mum, forgotten by those with mysogonistic tendencies 

On a side note, over 60 is not old these days, currently, after 10 years alone save a few FWB things, in a very strong healthy and fun relationship with a 34 year old. Who was told from the start, I have been paying for sex, and monogamy is not part of the deal. 

 
Hope you've managed to sort her gearbox out along the way   

[lillythesavage]

Hope you've managed to sort her gearbox out along the way   

Often, and well and truly last weekend, along with a friend and a few toys  , sharing is caring, walking the next day though.......

[Colston36]

Oh booo hooo, you are offended. FFS grow up. Frankly, you are a loser if you pay for sex. And I am a loser too!

That is drivel. Some are here because they get no sex. Others seek a kind of sex not available at home. I began for both reasons.

24 years ago, for a couple of years I flew to Germany regularly because that was where to get the particular perversion I wanted.

Then 9 years ago my relationship changed because I couldn't give my partner what she wanted - a baby. So she found someone who could and all is well with her.

That's when I started using ladies of the night here. And I found quite a few I like - sexually and as friends.

[Colston36]

Well   its a hard call

When the wife and I had bedroom issues we tried swinging for a couple of years {approx 10yrs ago} -  watching initially and then some light playing, we did a full swap once and she wasnt keen to repeat, watching and shagging next to coiuples got us very horny and worked wonders in the bedroom for a few of years.

Now its a bit flat again {menopause etc}  my wife encourages me to go for a "massage", she has no issue with me having a massage and HE, she doesnt know about the FS occasionally but I am more of a massage and HE nowadays {over 60 and struggle if you know what i mean} 25yrs together and talk about what we both need and want etc etc - works for us

A wonderful relationship. Very rare!

[webpunter]

That is drivel. Some are here because they get no sex. Others seek a kind of sex not available at home. I began for both reasons.

24 years ago, for a couple of years I flew to Germany regularly because that was where to get the particular perversion I wanted.

Then 9 years ago my relationship changed because I couldn't give my partner what she wanted - a baby. So she found someone who could and all is well with her.

That's when I started using ladies of the night here. And I found quite a few I like - sexually and as friends.

Finding em where they are likeable or are friends [of sorts] in a fetid bug chasing environment ain't gonna happen in a million years
Of course not having the opportunity to go in raw unless paying for it changes people's horizons
& it becomes the new norm
IMO its incel material in the making 
booo hooo = FRO

Crack on Sir

[kingmg]

In the most stupid way my wife found out that I was unfaithful to her (I won't go into details but basically I  was always been very careful but stupidly the routine made me trust and I let my guard down with my punting phone)

We had a good relationship (basically the only problem is the dead bedroom) she is really my friend and I feel like shit when all this happened, she was heartbroken but at the end she forgive me, only with the condition I won't do it again

Honestly I may be OK for a few months but I think at the end I will be back to punting.

All this happened so recently, she keeps asking me all the details of what I did. I don't think I feel ok sharing it but it feels she really wanted to know everything and have answers.

Honestly  :angelgirl:I would love to tell her to accept me like this and to just have a blind eye on these adventures but I'm pretty sure this won't go well. so I'm scratching my head in how to deal with this. If keep it secret again or just face an inevitable divorce.

I would really appreciate any advice of someone who has been through a similar experience.

take her to some singers events

[MissWolf]

take her to some singers events

Opera or grunge 🤔

[pbrown355]

Karaoke

[Thephoenix]

Yodeling?

[pbrown355]

What's delivering parcels got to do with it?

[penisilin]

To be honest the marriage won't be the same and my advice is to start getting a firm hold of your assets and prepare for a divorce or best case agree to an open marriage

[scutty brown]

take her to some singers events

Swing music is a bit old fashioned now, though if you were born in the 1950's you might get away with it

[Doctormike]

Been there myself
Time will pass and things will return to normal
Don’t talk about it if she asks questions, it’s rubbish but will
Improve
I been there
In time your punting desires may stop
U deffo werent have as much opportunity to punt if you expand family

[penisilin]

Been there myself
Time will pass and things will return to normal
Don’t talk about it if she asks questions, it’s rubbish but will
Improve
I been there
In time your punting desires may stop
U deffo werent have as much opportunity to punt if you expand family

Depending on the type of person his missus is. Most of them will nag and remind you of it at every half-chance which will run you dry in the long run