Punting while in a relationship/married

[Viper90]

So i have noticed in my time on this forum that many members here enjoy punting whilst also in a relationship.

My question is why you have chosen to do this and how it makes you feel?

For the record, there is no judgement in this post on my behalf.

Im just fascinated by modern day social commentery and watch a lot of podcasts on various topics, including relationships and their dynamics and would be interested to hear peoples takes that have experience.

[PumpDump]

If you type "punting married" in to the search box. It's been done before!

[hullad]

My late wife fell out with sex after the birth of our second son in 1988, sex became sporadic and by the turn of the millennium she had given up on it and we managed a quickie this century. I had a brainstorm one day, August Bank Holiday Monday 2013 and decided to go and find an escort as she was at work for the day and I had taken early retirement. The lady was shit ( and is still working) but I found a local adult site and then this one I learned and I have enjoyed my yen years. My hobbies and interests took me away from home regular so fitting in sessions was never a problem. My wife never knew she would have kicked off big time if she found our.

 I had no intentions of leaving her ever, perhaps the punting helped keep me at home as I got a lot of free time and I nearly had an affair at work, but no. Her death parted us and left me very sad for a while, I have met someone else a lot younger then me.

 My punting days are over now I walk away my secrets are locked away  now  I have met some lovely ladies three have been regular and two remain good friends with me post there retirement. The good times outwieght the bad punts

[Viper90]

My late wife fell out with sex after the birth of our second son in 1988, sex became sporadic and by the turn of the millennium she had given up on it and we managed a quickie this century. I had a brainstorm one day, August Bank Holiday Monday 2013 and decided to go and find an escort as she was at work for the day and I had taken early retirement. The lady was shit ( and is still working) but I found a local adult site and then this one I learned and I have enjoyed my yen years. My hobbies and interests took me away from home regular so fitting in sessions was never a problem. My wife never knew she would have kicked off big time if she found our.

 I had no intentions of leaving her ever, perhaps the punting helped keep me at home as I got a lot of free time and I nearly had an affair at work, but no. Her death parted us and left me very sad for a while, I have met someone else a lot younger then me.

 My punting days are over now I walk away my secrets are locked away  now  I have met some lovely ladies three have been regular and two remain good friends with me post there retirement. The good times outwieght the bad punts

Interesting read, thanks for that.

It seems to be true then that marriage and kids really can have an effect on a womans interest in sex.

[Viper90]

If you type "punting married" in to the search box. It's been done before!

Cheers

[leighdelamere]

Interesting read, thanks for that.

It seems to be true then that marriage and kids really can have an effect on a womans interest in sex.

There is a growing body of opinion - that I agree with - that contrary to popular opinion it is woman, not men, who are more likely to get bored with their partner in a long-term relationship. When you think about it there are sound evolutionary reasons for this : a woman stays with a man long enoughto see the infant through the early years but then is ready to mate with a different man with different DNA.

[PilotMan]

There is a growing body of opinion - that I agree with - that contrary to popular opinion it is woman, not men, who are more likely to get bored with their partner in a long-term relationship. When you think about it there are sound evolutionary reasons for this : a woman stays with a man long enoughto see the infant through the early years but then is ready to mate with a different man with different DNA.

Do you know anything about biology and evolution? I think you need to get yourself down the library fella.

The chances of an older women getting pregnant dwindles until menopause puts a stop to it altogether. Whilst the percentage of women in their 40's has increased, at 40+ women have just a 5% chance of giving birth naturally, and a 40% chances of having a miscarriage. External Link/Members Only


Is an older woman (who is unlikely to be highly fertile), going to be able to attract a fertile man who wants children, when said man has younger women to choose from in the gene pool - I think that's unlikely.

Whereas an older man can leave a relationship and still be confident that he can father children with another partner for many decades to come as is proven. I don't even need to quote from a medical book - Al Pacino has just fathered a child and he's 83. Ronnie Wood, Mick Jagger and so on.


I'm intrigued to hear where this "growing body of opinion" comes from, must be some weird sort of community, who haven't read any biology or evolution books in the past 200 years 

[PumpDump]

I immediately call bullshit on any sentence that starts with "There is a growing body of opinion that...", "it is believed that...", "experts believe...." or similar.

[willie loman]

Do you know anything about biology and evolution? I think you need to get yourself down the library fella.

The chances of an older women getting pregnant dwindles until menopause puts a stop to it altogether. Whilst the percentage of women in their 40's has increased, at 40+ women have just a 5% chance of giving birth naturally, and a 40% chances of having a miscarriage. External Link/Members Only


Is an older woman (who is unlikely to be highly fertile), going to be able to attract a fertile man who wants children, when said man has younger women to choose from in the gene pool - I think that's unlikely.

Whereas an older man can leave a relationship and still be confident that he can father children with another partner for many decades to come as is proven. I don't even need to quote from a medical book - Al Pacino has just fathered a child and he's 83. Ronnie Wood, Mick Jagger and so on.


I'm intrigued to hear where this "growing body of opinion" comes from, must be some weird sort of community, who haven't read any biology or evolution books in the past 200 years 

thats an aggressive reply which doesnt actually address the point he is making, which is women are quickly ready to hook up with someone new, besides if sex was all about babies, why would any women seek sex after the menopause. and why would men seek to have sex with older women. Its you who could benefit from a bit of wider reading.

[JontyR]

I immediately call bullshit on any sentence that starts with "There is a growing body of opinion that...", "it is believed that...", "experts believe...." or similar.

I'm the same when people quote "common sense".

[Doc Holliday]

There is a growing body of opinion - that I agree with - that contrary to popular opinion it is woman, not men, who are more likely to get bored with their partner in a long-term relationship. When you think about it there are sound evolutionary reasons for this : a woman stays with a man long enoughto see the infant through the early years but then is ready to mate with a different man with different DNA.

The first sentence is apparently statistically correct and I agree with Willie. The 'body of opinion' centres on studies which are unfortunately questionnaire based, but there is really no other way to gather data for this this, than to ask people and assume they are being truthful.

The data shows that whilst still more men than women have affairs while in relationships, the proportion has remained roughly the same over the last three decades, whereas the number of women having affairs has increased by around 40% closing the gap and which I think is around 20%/13%.

However I also agree with Pilotman that the extrapolation that this is based on women seeking further pregnancies etc is seriously flawed for the reasons he gives.

[PilotMan]

thats an aggressive reply which doesnt actually address the point he is making, which is women are quickly ready to hook up with someone new, besides if sex was all about babies, why would any women seek sex after the menopause. and why would men seek to have sex with older women. Its you who could benefit from a bit of wider reading.

It's you who could do with learning how to read and understand the point he is TRYING to make - he specifically said it was about mating, not dating.

From the OP

"but then is ready to mate with a different man with different DNA".

[PilotMan]

The data shows that whilst still more men than women have affairs while in relationships, the proportion has remained roughly the same over the last three decades, whereas the number of women having affairs has increased by around 40% closing the gap and which I think is around 20%/13%.

I agree, and as you say, they are the stats about affairs (and possibly the need for sexual fulfilment), but women aren't leaving relationships that have born children for the primary reason of wanting to mate and increase their DNA in to the world.

[akauya]

I immediately call bullshit on any sentence that starts with "There is a growing body of opinion that...", "it is believed that...", "experts believe...." or similar.

I'm the same when people quote "common sense".

My particular peeve is when people (usually politicians) say "The reality is..." and proceed to spout BS.

[PumpDump]

My particular peeve is when people (usually politicians) say "The reality is..." and proceed to spout BS.

Yes haha, a politician is the last person who knows anything about reality.