"Normal" people talking about punting in a positive way

[JPin]

I've made a pact with mysef never to share the fact that I punt with anyone, not even my closest friends. However, there have been a couple of occasions I've come close to revealing my habit, and both times it's been when people have spoken about punting in a positive way.

The most recent was my driving instructor.. We've been talking about dating and women etc for the last couple of lessons. He's married and a church-going man, although very down to Earth and authentic, not the stereotypical puritanical type. Anyway, the other day he goes, "I know it sounds a bit funny but if I was single, I'd just get an escort for the weekend. No fuss, none of that emotional stuff." I was pretty taken aback, and almost told him what I get up to.

The other time was when my three closest friends and I were out together. One of them was having marriage issues, lack of connection, resentment, lack of sex... the usual. At one point, one of my other mates advocated seeing escorts, and told a story about one of this workmates getting a duo at their hotel during a trip to Berlin years ago. But the one having marriage problems wasn't having it, "Nah man, I don't need to pay for it!". Again, I had to bite my tongue in that situation.

It's rare, but actually really nice to hear people talking this in a positive way because I often think it's such a taboo thing for most "normal" people.

Wondered if anyone else has had a similar experience?

[Colston36]

I'm pretty open about it, except to people I know will be shocked. My P.A. knows; two of my children do; my ex - with whom I still live - does in fact she said "I don't blame you" as we had drifted apart sexually. One or two friends do. I just don't mention it to people I know will disapprove

[Thephoenix]

With the greatest respect to the legend that is Colston, I would surmise that he would admit his lifestyle and openness doesn't reflect the majority of punters.

For a variety of reasons I believe most would adopt the Japanese proverb of
'See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil', and adopt a more discretionary approach.

It's possible to speak in support of prostitution without necessarily admitting you're a punter.
Unfortunately because prostitution is still stigmatised by many in society,  many punters are reluctant to admit to paying for sexual services.




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[Hornydevil666]

I know this sounds really weird but im a driving instructor and was speaking to a customer about if i wasn't married i would get an Escort, but didnt want to tell him that all his hard earned cash he pays me goes on hookers and drugs.
🤣🤣

[Problem Child]

I know this sounds really weird but im a driving instructor and was speaking to a customer about if i wasn't married i would get an Escort, but didnt want to tell him that all his hard earned cash he pays me goes on hookers and drugs.
🤣🤣

I think he’d be ok with that, it’s better than wasting your money on something frivolous..

[southcoastpunter]

I know this sounds really weird but im a driving instructor and was speaking to a customer about if i wasn't married i would get an Escort, but didnt want to tell him that all his hard earned cash he pays me goes on hookers and drugs.
🤣🤣

thats funny, I am a driving instructor and told a customer that if i wasn't married I would get an Escort - but i meant an Escort RS Turbo. My wife would never let me get one of those! (haha - not really!)

[Hobbit]

I would be very careful telling people. What people say on the outside is completely different to what they are thinking and feeling inside. Some people just agree for validation or just are agreeable people who don't like conflict. But on the inside, they have completely different opinions. The only 3 people that should ever know that you see hookers are you, the hooker, and UKP.

[Colston36]

With the greatest respect to the legend that is Colston, I would surmise that he would admit his lifestyle and openness doesn't reflect the majority of punters.

For a variety of reasons I believe most would adopt the Japanese proverb of
'See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil', and adopt a more discretionary approach.

It's possible to speak in support of prostitution without necessarily admitting you're a punter.
Unfortunately because prostitution is still stigmatised by many in society,  many punters are reluctant to admit to paying for sexual services.




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You are right. We are conditioned by our background. My parents, especially my mother, were unusually frank about relationships - though not very informative about sex. I had to develop my own kinks:-)

[whiskeygogo]

I have noticed there is a group of men that will punt on holiday, like your friend in Berlin, but wouldn't do it in the UK. These people will though likely think less of you if you admit you do it in the UK, as in their head its different somehow.

[LLPunting]

I would be very careful telling people. What people say on the outside is completely different to what they are thinking and feeling inside. Some people just agree for validation or just are agreeable people who don't like conflict. But on the inside, they have completely different opinions. The only 3 people that should ever know that you see hookers are you, the hooker, and UKP.

Just him, her and 103k people then.

[Hornydevil666]

I have noticed there is a group of men that will punt on holiday, like your friend in Berlin, but wouldn't do it in the UK. These people will though likely think less of you if you admit you do it in the UK, as in their head its different somehow.

What happens in Germany, stays in Germany (wink) 🙈🙉🙊

[victor989]

I would never admit to being a punter, even if the Pope spoke about it in a positive way.

[bristolnick]

It's been my secret for a long time now. No need to discuss it with anyone.

[senordingdongs]

In London and the South of England and the big cities it's not a big deal. Same with women having an Onlyfans and posting links on Instagram in amongst photos of them on a family day out, tea with granny etc then a link to a photo on Twitter with a Doc Johnson rammed up their anus.

But in my neck of the woods it's not something I'd divulge to anyone, it's still relativelt conservative, almost a backward mentality, god fearing sex behind closed doors attitude. I would say that a majority in rural towns and villages if they can't get any action down the local pub or community group then it's celibacy all the way.

[tp69]

This post made me wonder about something. Stories you might reveal to various family members if you were to develop dementia one day. I wonder if you'd be able to keep that side of your life hidden or if you'd be less aware of the risk. Strange thing to think about perhaps.

[Thephoenix]

This post made me wonder about something. Stories you might reveal to various family members if you were to develop dementia one day. I wonder if you'd be able to keep that side of your life hidden or if you'd be less aware of the risk. Strange thing to think about perhaps.

Possibly not as losing inhibitions can be one of the effects of dementia in my experience of caring for a number of elderly relatives over the years.

[tp69]

Possibly not as losing inhibitions can be one of the effects of dementia in my experience of caring for a number of elderly relatives over the years.

Yes. And perhaps losing the mental connections to current relationships. Hopefully you wouldn't reveal it to your children, but you may not be aware of who they are when talking to them. Significantly worse if you have a wife at the time.

[Dylanbob]

I also have made the decision to not tell anyone anyone no matter what. Even having some of the mates I would "love" to tell subsequently tell me about the "one time" they did it and play a reaction De Niro would be proud of. Especially considering the poor value they got!

Whenever it comes up, I'm always of the stance if someone wants to do that with their body fair play to them as long as it harms no one else. But for me the risks are not worth it and doubt I would like it considering how fake i find strip clubs.

[Fuzzyduck]

No-one needs to know IMO. You don't know how it's going bite your ass. Your driving instructor talks to much and mentions it to someone who knows you and doesn't have the same views. You fall out with your closest confident and they trash you out of spite. You blurb to some like-minded guys at the work piss up and next thing you know the women at work won't come near you. Punting with mates abroad sounds like it could be fun but one of them will always blab.

I can see how, if you're young and single, you might not give a shit and it might have limited consequences. It you're older with more at stake, then I'd keep my gob shut.

[bigboy96]

I've never told anyone. Even a best friend can be an enemy if a falling out occurs. Sometimes when I'm out walking with a friend, we pass a massage place that I've been in, and I notice he looks at it out of the corner of his eye, and I wonder what is he thinking. Is it. 'I wonder what it's like in there' or could it be 'I need to make another booking soon'  I just hope it's not the latter if I decide to go.

[whiskeygogo]

This post made me wonder about something. Stories you might reveal to various family members if you were to develop dementia one day. I wonder if you'd be able to keep that side of your life hidden or if you'd be less aware of the risk. Strange thing to think about perhaps.

From observing my grandad, if these aren't stories you haven't regularly told before, you are likely not going to have the brain power to turn these fading memories into stories, but if say you regularly spoke about them to one group and not to another, you will likely tell everyone

[RedKettle]

I don't even admit it to myself.

[Fuzzyduck]

I don't even admit it to myself.

Best starting point to blag out complete denial if you ever get busted.

[Hobbit]

Just him, her and 103k people then.

Yes but the 103k are in the same boat.

[Thephoenix]

I don't even admit it to myself.

Admit what?

[Hobbit]

Admit what?

He can't tell you that because he would be admitting it to himself. Do you see the paradox?

[Jonestown]

Lie your head off if you have to but never admit it, even if they torture you.

On the other hand, how many on here have had people confess to them that they punt, not many I'll wager.

[Handel2020]

In my experience there are some women who will detest you for it and will associate the behavior with other negative ideas they have about men.

I have seen women walking around Amsterdam and talking to each other like they are open minded about the whole thing, but I don't buy it. If they find out there is a very good chance they will put you into the same category as some criminal they have seen in the papers, or some lesser accomplished woman hater. Society's views may be confused on punting but women tend to be at one end of that spectrum in my view.

[stampjones]

If you tell someone and expect them to keep it secret, you’re asking someone who has less invested than you to do something you couldnt manage. I you care about random other people finding out, dont tell anyone else. Thats my philosophy anyway

[Mr Sinister]

I'm wary and very strict on who I talk about punting with IRL, I have close friends who I've punted with on nights out and lads holidays so they're fine. I've had some other acquaintances that I've shared some info with seeing as they're sensible and trustworthy enough.

Work colleagues nah not happening as people talk, I know some dirty secrets about a lot of my colleagues especially senior management, people really do fucking talk in the office.

I was chatting to a corporate acquaintance not so long ago and he divulged in all his punting antics, at home, expensive hotels and apartments the lot, he's married too. I laughed but didn't divulge myself as dude is too much of a loose cannon.

I would never admit or talk about it to a woman I'm involved with or potential to be, that will tank you right away

[Jonestown]

I was chatting to a corporate acquaintance not so long ago and he divulged in all his punting antics, at home, expensive hotels and apartments the lot, he's married too. I laughed but didn't divulge myself as dude is too much of a loose cannon.

A number of years back I was sitting in a hotel bar in a far flung country with a work colleague, it was late at night and alcohol had been taken, the bar was dotted with ladies of the night going about their business. My colleague, who did this trip regularly, started giving me a running commentary, explaining in detail what was going on and what to watch out for when he suddenly turned and looked at me and said, “I don’t know why I’m telling you all this, you look like the last person on earth who would pay for sex”. With that he changed the subject, still not sure if it was a compliment or a put down, but glad I kept my mouth shut.

[Lou2019]

Following with interest, I find the taboo around buying and selling sex a fascinating subject, sadly I don’t think people’s attitude towards it will ever change.

[Fuzzyduck]

Following with interest, I find the taboo around buying and selling sex a fascinating subject, sadly I don’t think people’s attitude towards it will ever change.

I'm not so sure. This might be complete bollocks and I've not got anything concrete to back it up but I sense the younger generation (Gen Z) have more open attitudes to sex (easy access to porn and SPs working independently e.g. Onlyfans). So their views on paying for sex might be different, certainly compared to my and my parents' generation. However, I'm likely to have retired from punting (aka 6ft under) before I notice any real difference.

[myothernameis]

This post made me wonder about something. Stories you might reveal to various family members if you were to develop dementia one day. I wonder if you'd be able to keep that side of your life hidden or if you'd be less aware of the risk. Strange thing to think about perhaps.

In hospital, and under anesthetic, and when you come round, who knows what going to come out, like this; she choking on a big black cock   

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[billybobsmith]

I'm not so sure. This might be complete bollocks and I've not got anything concrete to back it up but I sense the younger generation (Gen Z) have more open attitudes to sex (easy access to porn and SPs working independently e.g. Onlyfans). So their views on paying for sex might be different, certainly compared to my and my parents' generation. However, I'm likely to have retired from punting (aka 6ft under) before I notice any real difference.

Bit hit and miss this.
Some things seem fairly acceptable, others don't.

I've mentioned, generally jokingly, about seeing hookers in Las Vegas casinos, getting propositioned by one at 3:45pm at Kings Cross railway station etc.  Laugh it off more than anything, but I don't think I would openly tell someone that I've done so and so.
Sure some people expect things to happen if a single male goes to Thailand or Amsterdam for example.

OF seems pretty normal to be honest.  Have had a few girls at work joke about how they should do it; one openly told everyone she was getting cash for sex etc.; another has a friend who is on the game; one sold feet pics; knew one person at work who had paid for sex, and the women just though he was weir; another girl (around 20 at present) openly telling people how she got drunk with her boyfriend one night, went dogging and got shagged by 5 or so men

SA was a mixed bag.  Yes lots were happy to sleep with an older man for the cash, some told friends (if not most or all, who knows?), and others kept it discreet.

Sex toys.  Fairly normal when it comes to women and dildos, rabbits etc., although if a man admits to using a fleshlight, he's a weirdo, yet using your hand is the norm.

A lot of the youngers ones can pretty much get themselves on Tinder etc. and get laid whenever they choose.  It's practically on tap these days.
Us older ones are more reliant on paying for it, it being limited in a relationship, or hoping some potentially younger women has an older man fetish etc.

[badsin]

I went to Prague 20 year or so ago, with a couple of mates, their girlfriends, and their female friends. Must of been over 12 of us.
Whilst getting gradually more drunk through the evening, the girls suggested we go to a strip bar. The girls had never been and wanted to see what went on......
So we went, I think the girls were actually impressed at the stripper's figure's, and dance moves.
Some did offer private dance's, and the girls iwas with paid for me to have a private dance. Nothing special, it was a strip, but no touching etc.....not without additional tips anyway.
I was quizzed about it afterwards, and I was totally honest that extras were on offer. I'd say most of the girls were ok with it, and some suggesting they could do it as a job. Obviously talk is cheap, but interesting to hear their observations. To be fair I'd of paid a couple of them 

[Lou2019]

I'm not so sure. This might be complete bollocks and I've not got anything concrete to back it up but I sense the younger generation (Gen Z) have more open attitudes to sex (easy access to porn and SPs working independently e.g. Onlyfans). So their views on paying for sex might be different, certainly compared to my and my parents' generation. However, I'm likely to have retired from punting (aka 6ft under) before I notice any real difference.

You make a valid point, we live in hope 

[Southernbloke]

I’ve had some experience of civvie girls saying that they would have sex for money but usually when it really comes down to it they don’t go through with it.
Many moons ago I drove for an escort agency round London and for some reason they always gave me the new girls usually with a more experienced girl..
I lost count of the number of girls who did one booking and then I had to drive them home , they really hated it.
Didn’t bother me as I felt very sorry for them and as I said I had an experienced girl in the car who usually had half a dozen regulars who wanted to book her so I ended up doing quite well out of it

[Handel2020]

...girls i was with paid for me to have a private dance. Nothing special, it was a strip, but no touching etc.....not without additional tips anyway.
I was quizzed about it afterwards, and I was totally honest that extras were on offer. I'd say most of the girls were ok with it, and some suggesting they could do it as a job. Obviously talk is cheap, but interesting to hear their observations. To be fair I'd of paid a couple of them 

I think women consider that to be normal and healthy behaviour in men at some point in their lives. Stag nights etc. so it is not stigmatised. That could be put in the same bracket as porn which some young women consider a reasonable thing for a guy to be into.

Paying for it is a different thing. I have heard of women visiting Amsterdam in group visits to cities and apparently being open minded to what is going on, while even talking to guys in their group about whether they would go for it and pay a hooker. However, it would be a foolish guy who did so with women around even if they seemed open minded.

[dub6747]

No, never spoken to anybody about my hobby...the closest was during a punt 20 years ago when the girl asked me what I was into and when I was non-committal  laughed about punting being my hobby

[senordingdongs]

Surely most men are paying for it one way or another. With a new kitchen, designer handbag, diamond ring etc but pay with cash with a woman you’ve never met and it’s seen as seedy and shameful.

[Watts.E.Dunn]

Surely most men are paying for it one way or another. With a new kitchen, designer handbag, diamond ring etc but pay with cash with a woman you’ve never met and it’s seen as seedy and shameful.

Dunno, my ex Missus took cash as well as everything else!...

[Handel2020]

Surely most men are paying for it one way or another. With a new kitchen, designer handbag, diamond ring etc but pay with cash with a woman you’ve never met and it’s seen as seedy and shameful.

I don't think you could ever get to the root of it. Women can't articulate exactly why they hate men who do pay for it, but they do. Meanwhile they can bang all the guys they want, and choose who they want on dating apps, and that is all good in their view.

[senordingdongs]

I don't think you could ever get to the root of it. Women can't articulate exactly why they hate men who do pay for it, but they do. Meanwhile they can bang all the guys they want, and choose who they want on dating apps, and that is all good in their view.

Mate of mine got years of grief from his wife for going to a sports bar aka strip club in Prague, All he did was have a drink and watched but his wife found out and brings it up when they have a row. She has a girls night out at the Chippendales but of course to her it's just good old innocent fun.

[Jonestown]

I don't think you could ever get to the root of it. Women can't articulate exactly why they hate men who do pay for it, but they do.

Ive always thought that on the social / moral turpitude scale punters come somewhere above child molesters but below people who mutilate farm animals and horses in fields at night. Women despise punters I'd imagine because we use our superior earning power to take advantage of women, and also the punting process cuts out the natural hold women have over men.

[Handel2020]

Ive always thought that on the social / moral turpitude scale punters come somewhere above child molesters but below people who mutilate farm animals and horses in fields at night. Women despise punters I'd imagine because we use our superior earning power to take advantage of women, and also the punting process cuts out the natural hold women have over men.

The last part hits the nail on the head. I have come across discussions from women who want punting banned and the only consistent theme I can find is that they want things to be more difficult for men. I can't find any other rationale that remains consistent in their views.

I also believe your point about punting being seen as a deviant behaviour is also true. In fact that is my experience of it although I can't go into too much detail here. I think it is seen in their minds as a lower level behaviour possibly leading to worse things. You can probably find cases where this has happened, but then there are plenty of guys who don't have wives and families and don't need to pay for it who commit crimes as well.

[Thephoenix]

Ive always thought that on the social / moral turpitude scale punters come somewhere above child molesters but below people who mutilate farm animals and horses in fields at night. Women despise punters I'd imagine because we use our superior earning power to take advantage of women, and also the punting process cuts out the natural hold women have over men.

Is it men taking advantage of women?
I sometimes think it's the other way around.

[jimbobted]

Is it men taking advantage of women?
I sometimes think it's the other way around.

Usually a bit of both IME.

[django0700]

The only mates who are aware of me punting are those who introduced me to this glorious hobby...But even with them i make sure they understand the concept of Mutually assured destruction were they ever to develop lose lips disease...

[Bru1901]

Most are aware of private dances at strip clubs but not meeting escorts in private

They are okay for this but i doubt they would be okay with zescorts in hotel meets