Chloe Kisses - Milton Keynes - WTF The cheeky bitch used a wet-wipe on my cock

[vt]

She was a decent shag when I met her about 5 years ago at Annabellas. Must have gone downhill since then.

You can decide for yourself...

External Link/Members Only

[vorian]

You can decide for yourself...

External Link/Members Only

Nice one, and for the record Chloe you do look like you are fifty.

[mattylondon]

You can decide for yourself...

External Link/Members Only

The picture's so fucking fuzzy, it's hard to tell! Yea, not a day over 49! 

My opinion has always been early 50s. And that would be easier to tell without the fuzzy picture.

My problem with her isn't how old she is. Many prostitutes and even women lie about that. I take that as a given. I don't even care if she's a stellar shag or not. She may well be, for all I know. My problem is her stinking anti punter attitude. And that won't change.

Perhaps you should go and punt her, as she's in your neck of the woods and write a review? 

I'll give her some credit. Brave of her to post that. I'll always give her credit for having the courage of her own convictions, even though she's wrong 90% of the time! However, this is a very cunning woman, who  knew it would be discussed on here. 

[Matium]

You can decide for yourself...

External Link/Members Only

Silly girl.

You can tell her age from the lines on her neck.

Note how tight the skin is on her face.

The photo is fuzzy but you can just about make out the lines under her eyes.

And yes, Chloe, we know you're reading this thread, the photo is of you looking 50.

[cunnyhunt]

There must be a lot of Scotchtape on the back of her head pulling the skin tight 

And yes she does look 50 to me.

[mattylondon]

There must be a lot of Scotchtape on the back of her head pulling the skin tight 

Resistance is futile! 

Hidden Image/Members Only

[James999]

You can decide for yourself...

External Link/Members Only

She obviously regards looking 50 as a compliment, as such it is probably a lot older 

[berksboy]

 when young and good looking you post a good clear pic , when old and past it you post crap as we can see from OP , good on him.

[lordship]

Why the hell post a fanny pic on twitter ?ugh

[Bob Cratchit]

Tried to book her as my first escort, because I'd been aware of %%% for probably over a decade before actually taking the plunge and the idea of a prostitute with a strong personality seemed appealing.

Fucked me about trying to find the e-mail with what I wanted, then suddenly had a 'family emergency' while I was on a train to Milton Keynes. Almost certainly to my benefit, as I wanted domme/sex with a significant amount of pain and was bringing along my horrific synthetic weapons (not exactly a newbie). Not knowing who the fuck I was it what I wanted within about an hour and a half of meeting screams really fucking dangerous to me if we're talking about reasonably advanced S&M.

Offered me the cost of the train fare off my next booking, then didn't bother to respond to my e-mail.

Saw this thread, but decided not to comment, as I don't want to spend my life talking other people down.

Stayed on this site, got my first escort out of the way and have had some great experiences based on recommendations posted by other members (Jenny.1 in Birmingham, now I can die happy),

Saw that picture of her face and realised I had an even luckier escape than I'd originally thought.

Thanks UK Punting, I think I'm in the right place.

[mattylondon]

Why the hell post a fanny pic on twitter ?ugh

I wouldn't even try to fathom what goes on in this woman's mind. I tried for a while and gave up! 

And to think she has older children. God knows what they must think of her Twitter antics, posting pictures of her pussy online. She has no shame.

[James999]

Why the hell post a fanny pic on twitter ?

I thought it was a face pic 

[mattylondon]

I thought it was a face pic 

He was referring to her main Twitter pic, which is her fanny 

Certainty more appealing than her stretched boat race. 

[James999]

He meant her main Twitter pic, which is her fanny 

I think you'll find lordship is a SHE not a HE 

[mattylondon]

I think you'll find lordship is a SHE not a HE 

oh really? Hadn't read their posts tbh?!   

So can we see a picture of their fanny then or profile link? Fairs fair and all that?!

[James999]

So can we see a picture of their fanny then or profile link? Fairs fair and all that?!

Ask her 

[mattylondon]

Ask her 

Can't be arsed to have that sort of discussion with her!

I'll just read their posts, when I have the inclination, which isn't now!

Is she fit or not? That's all I want to know. The precedents aren't promising but you never know! 

[James999]

Is she fit or not?

Lets just say younger and better looking than Klowee..... Doesn't narow it down much 

[mattylondon]

Lets just say younger and better looking than Klowee..... Doesn't narow it down much 

That was as helpful as a chocolate tea pot! Cheers! 

As klowee is a bitter old looking granny dog it doesn't really narrow it down for me! 

You can do better than that! Would you punt her?

[James999]

Would you punt her?

No 

[mattylondon]

No 

Thats good enough for me! Happy Easter!   

[vt]

Chloe's posted another face pic...this time no make-up, but still fuzzy...

External Link/Members Only

Would you??

[Matium]

Chloe's posted another face pic...this time no make-up, but still fuzzy...

External Link/Members Only

Would you??

I was having breakfast when I looked at that!

Put me right off!

 

[James999]

Chloe's posted another face pic...this time no make-up, but still fuzzy...

External Link/Members Only

Would you??

I have printed it off and stuck it on my lawn, that should keep the cats off 

[Hogan]

Poor quality pics because she doesn't get enough bookings to be able to afford a new phone. Has to use her dusty old phone instead!

[Hogan]

Why the hell post a fanny pic on twitter ?ugh

Flashing her fanny to get some attention from the boys because she's a class-less hoe with a dusty phone.

[Roland D Hay]

External Link/Members Only


6. Used a wet-wipe on my cock before oral. This is so disrespectful and gets an automatic negative review. My todger is cut and I go into punts fully scrubbed and a damn sight cleaner/fresher than her. Maybe she thought I'd spent my day shagging strangers and not bothering to shower afterwards. Cheeky-fucking-cow!!

  AVOID!

I hadn't thought of it in these terms before but you're bang on, it's fucking disrespectful. I too am freshly showered before every appointment and it fucks me off when they wipe my bell end with a wet wipe.

[yorkshire123]

I hadn't thought of it in these terms before but you're bang on, it's fucking disrespectful. I too am freshly showered before every appointment and it fucks me off when they wipe my bell end with a wet wipe.

On a personal level i totally agree with you Roland.
However i think we are at risk of thinking that every punter has the same self hygiene mentality.

I have met a few prossies that wipe on the first meeting but don't on subsequent meets once they have gauged how clean you really are.

As i do a lot of travelling added to my inability to drive more than 50 miles without having a piss (fuck I'm getting old) i seem to be spending more & more time in public toilets (not in a George Michael type of way  ) & the amount of guys i see not bothering to wash their hands after is quite staggering.
If they can not be bothered to wash after a piss or crap imagine what state their cocks would be in & I'm sure a percentage of these would be punters, on reflection don't as you may just be tucking into your breakfast 

What pisses me off more is when they try to polish my bell end within an inch of its life, I'm almost tempted to wipe her fanny before going near it to she how she likes it, maybe next time?

[Jim Panzee]

Hello all.

I joined this Forum on account of this thread and just wanted to contribute. lol

I booked Chloe some time ago on account of her website photos which do look good. I have a thing for Red Heads so was really looking forward to a good session but when I opened the door to her flat O lawdy mama mia . She looks fuck all like them photo's at all and I wasn't attracted to her at all. I thought to myself "Here we fucking go".

I didn't bolt as for some reason I didn't want to loose face or cause a scene and having only punted a few times I'm not very experienced in the paying for sex business and naively assumed that people were honest like myself.

It's right about the wet wipes on yer cock as well, she did that with me and I think she over does it with the lube. Is it a common occurrence to have your cock constantly wiped when seeing a prossie ?

Having said all that she did seem a personable person quite easy to talk to putting you at ease and all that. I just didn't find her very attractive and what she was wearing a fishnet body stocking didn't do her any favours as she does have quite a belly on her.

She has got a nice Ass  though.

Overall I think she is overpriced and should be £100 per hour and no charges for extras.

[mh]

Nice choice of nickname, "Jim".

Is it a common occurrence to have your cock constantly wiped when seeing a prossie ?

Have you not seen any others, then? I've only been wet-wiped a few times over the years (and just once in any session, not constantly). I just ignore it; it's their stupidity to think it makes any difference and it's only themselves will have to taste it...

[Jim Panzee]

Nice choice of nickname, "Jim".

Have you not seen any others, then?

Yes but not many and they never wet wiped my cock and balls. 

[mattylondon]

Overall I think she is overpriced and should be £100 per hour and no charges for extras.

Superb posting name, by the way. 

We all make punting mistakes. I've punted a few hounds myself, so I feel your pain! 

Mind you, she clearly knows how to wet wipe a cock clean though! I wonder if it's simply OCD in her old age?

[Roland D Hay]

Nice choice of nickname, "Jim".

Yes but only until some cunt starts calling him Jim Pansy 

[Stalinator]

All I can say is thank fuck for this thread. I have dodged a bullet there. I posted over on prossienet for anal in MK only to have her touting herself by private message. She seems very forceful in her messages to me.

Thanks again folks for helping me save my hard earned.

[finn5555]

All I can say is thank fuck for this thread. I have dodged a bullet there. I posted over on prossienet for anal in MK only to have her touting herself by private message. She seems very forceful in her messages to me.

Thanks again folks for helping me save my hard earned.

Lucky escape fella she is desperate for business that's why she touts 

[tesla]

I had a booking with her in May but she canceled with a few hours notice, due to illness.

lucky escape, she did recommend an alternative which was a good punt, Louise was her name

[OldAdmin]

One of the ass-crawling fluffies suddenly popped up yesterday touting how amazing she and Danish Pia were, and suggesting anyone who says otherwise is a bad punter who mistreated them (the usual tripe they use to discredit punters).
And now crying that he got banned.

[Bangers and Gash]

One of the ass-crawling fluffies suddenly popped up yesterday touting how amazing she and Danish Pia were, and suggesting anyone who says otherwise is a bad punter who mistreated them (the usual tripe they use to discredit punters).
And now crying that he got banned.

Damn! I missed that... 

 

[OldAdmin]

She and her fluffy fanboys have so few brain cells that they can't understand why accusing everyone of being bad punters solely because they post negative review is not acceptable and results in a banning.

She got dozens of punters banned / premodded / censored from another (smaller) forum just because they dared to challenge her or defended this site, yet accuses us of doing what she did.

[peter_bungee]

Haha I have read her posts on there anything which she remotely disagrees with she will go into some long page rant and if you have a typical punter mindset of just wanting to chat about the best pussy to bang, you will not last long on there.  This forum is much more relaxed and open.

anyway I did almost book her about a year back but luckily she wasn't available that day, so glad I didn't put myself through that.  As mentioned you have to feel for her, most girls just to it for a few years and move into the real world, she is still scrapping away aged 50 and that's all they know.

[vt]

Haha I have read her posts on there anything which she remotely disagrees with she will go into some long page rant and if you have a typical punter mindset of just wanting to chat about the best pussy to bang, you will not last long on there.  This forum is much more relaxed and open.

anyway I did almost book her about a year back but luckily she wasn't available that day, so glad I didn't put myself through that.  As mentioned you have to feel for her, most girls just to it for a few years and move into the real world, she is still scrapping away aged 50 and that's all they know.

Sadly she constantly works against punter's interests on the other moribund forum...I think it's because if punters get to speak truly honestly there, they might be emboldened to speak out about her or her friends' offerings in a negative way...and she can't tolerate that.

Glad you found your way here...you can say what needs saying without excessive moderation or fear of reprisals from hotheaded prossies.

[peter_bungee]

Sadly she constantly works against punter's interests on the other moribund forum...I think it's because if punters get to speak truly honestly there, they might be emboldened to speak out about her or her friends' offerings in a negative way...and she can't tolerate that.

Glad you found your way here...you can say what needs saying without excessive moderation or fear of reprisals from hotheaded prossies.

Yep this forum is so much more refreshing abait slightly less personal due to more members

I even had warning/threatening pm's from a mod on there for saying negative feedback about girls at Annabellas and posts deleted.  I think due to hod paying them big advertising fees....site not being run in favour of punters.

[hockogrockle]

Going back to the original review that has caused so much discussion:
1. i don't have a problem with a woman using a wet wipe on my cock if it makes her feel comfortable, even though my personal hygiene is impeccable.
2. The idea of a punt accompanied by (presumably sacred) choral music, especially if it is renaissance polyphony, is rather nice.
That apart, the punt seems to have had nothing to commend it at all.

[Bangers and Gash]

  Yes Ive looked at a guy once and thought there was something very odd about his manner, several times I thought perhaps I should just bin this booking, give him half his cash back and say goodbye, I was right, he did me a really shite review on ukp so I should have listened to my gut and binned him when I had the chance

Considering the rotten toothed pro$$ie is now badmouthing / lying about me on UKE I think I'm within my rights to bump this review and put this overweight 50+yo chain smoking pro$$ie straight.

Yes, the pro$$ie named Chloe Pisses felt so uncomfortable during the punt that she told me ''you're welcome back anytime.'' Obviously I never bothered because fatties aren't my bag and perfunctory sex with her was like wrestling a 3 piece suite up a spiral staircase. I guess it just goes to show that a man hating pro$$ie never changes her spots ..... even after all these years. 

AVOID, AVOID, AVOID.

   

[vw]

Considering the rotten toothed pro$$ie is now badmouthing / lying about me on UKE I think I'm within my rights to bump this review and put this overweight 50+yo chain smoking pro$$ie straight.

Must be bad to get a reaction like this, did she mention your name or have you just done that ?

[James999]

She's a big old ginge, nowonder she's bitter 

[Johny Stone]

From External Link/Members Only:

On 8 January 2015 ChloeKisses vandalised this page using a sockpuppet account called LHOB.

[Bigus Dickus]

Obviously I never bothered because fatties aren't my bag and perfunctory sex with her was like wrestling a 3 piece suite up a spiral staircase.

Sounds like a keeper! 

[Ben4454]

Never reveal your ukpunting identity.

I have and never will reveal my identity or my ukpunting membership

[cockneybstrd]

She's a big old ginge, nowonder she's bitter 

Big fat gingers need love too James though normally they are paying for it not getting paid for it