OK here's my little report of Marakech.
I had a great few days there, did some touristy stuff too such as the market, atlas mountains and it was quality. One of the best holidays I've ever had.
Also went to a shisha bar, Sky 5, 555 club and Theatro. My favourite club was 555 easily, had a proper good laugh in there.
I went on my own and you do need to be pretty street wise, I'm fairly well traveled but still ended up making a lot of stupid mistakes, I think it's been said before but you really do need to negotiate everything upfront, It's easy to forget this after a few beers but it will end up causing any unnecessary problems.
On the first day I was pretty tired so organised to meet a girl from Badoo or Tinder, she was cute as a button and came over around 9pm. She turned up with 6 beers and block of hash so fair play to her!
Spent the night just smoking, drinking, sleeping and whatever else.... She was a really nice girl. Spent the next morning doing most of the same until 2pm, I tried to wake her up to ask her to leave as I was starving, I couldn't even get a stir from her and had to check to see if she was dead.
Had to shake her to wake her up, when she finally came round she asked if she could stay sleeping as she was tired. I just left her in the apartment and went out to go to grips with Geuliz and get my bearings. Came back a few hours later and she was still sparko, told her she had to leave and asked what she wanted. She first asked for 3000 saying she'd been in my room 24 hours. I told her she'd been asleep most of the day, and I'd tried to make her leave earlier, she replied she charges 1500 for 12 hours and it was nearly 24 hours. She insisted she told me this on Whatsapp/Tinder so I asked her to prove it, we both checked the chat logs and she'd never given me a price. I said if she'd have said 3000 from the start I wouldn't have paid it.
Anyway a bit of a argument ensued and I ended up giving her 2000, she didn't look very happy and put a bit of a dampener on things but I wasn't about to pay 3000 for someone to sleep.
Noticed later on she'd deleted me from Whatsapp. Again I felt a bit crap about it all especially as it was first experience but if I'd have spoken to her before hand we both would of known where we stand. Again just a rookie mistake.
I had a walk down the "scenic route" but I never really noticed anyone giving me the "eye", maybe because of the UN/Cop thing going on, obviously I can't conclude this is the case as it was my first trip.
Second night I went to 555, again I had a few drinks before I left my apartment and forgot to agree a price with the taxi. He then tries to tell me 300 dirhams!!! I told him to basically fuck off and he starts shouting and screaming talking about the traffic and how this is normal with COP going on, I told him bollocks and got out the taxi, he got out too and I was thinking here we go. Second night in Marrakech! Anyway he was still shouting and fortunately for me the security guard recognised me from Sky5 earlier in the day and started walking over, I gave the taxi a 50 note and just started walking off. He was shouting something in Arabic and still jumping about. The security guard asked me what happened and said "Yes you're right, don't worry, come and enjoy the club sir" Sound.
Again, all could of been sorted by just agreeing the price before hand. Rookie mistake.
The girls in 555 were super cute, I think I didn't see one which wasn't less than a 7/10. Some of them wouldn't look a miss on a cat walk or glossy mag, although they tended to be the most miserable. Some said 4000 and one even said 5000 although she was unbelievably nice. I didn't have that kind of budget. Plus they were pretty stone cold and miserable.
Went to the bar and some Moroccan guy started talking to me asking if I was on my own, I said yes and he said ohhh, are you looking for a girl. Explained it was my birthday and he bought me a beer. I can only describe him as the Moroccan version of Ryland
His boyfriend waltzed over and they ended up being my wing man, haha scouting around the club and bringing girls over. Eventually ended up on the dance floor and some girl came bouncing over, 8/10, busty with a big bum. Ended up saying she would stay for stay for 2000. Got her down to 1200 and I would pay for the doorman. (100). Went to the toilet, came back and some over guy had snagged her, obviously got her 2000.
Went home empty handed, to be honest at 5am I was pretty tired and drunk. Shared a taxi back to McDonlds with Moroccan Ryland and his pal and had a bite to eat. While I was in there my Whatsapp pinged with a girl I'd met on Tinder, she'd been to Cash club and had obviously come home empty handed too.
She ended up coming over around 7am and stayed till around 4pm. She was small and cute. She looked like princess Jasmine. Paid 1000. The worst thing was not being able to to talk, I found it really weird and she did too. We had to keep typing to each other over Whatsapp.
Ended up going for Hamman near the market after she left, it was amazing. The girl was tall and dark skinned, 7/10 easy. Paid 300 for the Hammam and 1 hour massage. I have to say the massage was really really excellent and I've had LOTS of massages over the years. She asked if I wanted it hard or soft and I opted for hard. It was just the ticket. Asked if I wanted oral or HE. Ended up with the latter for an extra 200. This wasn't great to be honest, totally uninterested and it was so dark when I finished she kept goin full throttle as she obviously hadn't noticed.
Had to tell her stop stop stop.
Came out feeling like I was floating so went for a walk round the markets, ate some food and then got TOTALLY lost in the souks, how anyone knows where to go I've no idea. Totally mental place. Bought some bits and pieces and went home. Ended up having a quiet night as I had an early morning excursion.
Next day I went back to scenic route around 6pm and it seemed pretty quiet? No eye contact or anything, I could see a few girls at Starbucks but the entire place was PACKED (there was a queue for the table).
Decided to switch up tactics and stood by the Starbucks (As if waiting for a table) by the advertising board and just kept a lookout. Within an hour had 5 or 6 numbers! Result. The security guard and some army guys were stood by me the entire time, you have to be discreet but I just flicked my eyes and tapped my phone and most girls got the idea, ended up walking a bit down the road where they gave me some paper. Just made myself look like I was waiting for someone, if I walked off I pretend to answer a phone call. No idea if I looked suspicious but noone bothered me.
Rang the best one out of the 6, she followed me to the apartment she said she wanted 600. Got to the apartment, did the deed and she said she needed to go downstairs to get a cigarette lighter, told her OK no problem. She just said keep the door unlocked.
Anyway an hour later she hadn't returned, went into the kitchen and stupidly realised I'd left £80 on the side which was now missing. Again another rookie mistake, but I'd forgot it was there as I'd swapped my wallets over earlier in the day to one I'd bought at the market.
Went to Theatro which I didn't like compared to 555, too dark and cramped. Saw Emmanuelle Adebeyor in the VIP section at the top, tried to get his attention but he ignored me.
Met a lad from London and met some absolute cutey, dark skin, slim, small boobs but a bubble butt. Had a great laugh with her in the club dancing and teasing me. Ended up agreeing 1000 and we left around 2.30am. BIGGEST MISTAKE I made was my phone had ran out of battery so I didn't know what my address was. Told her to get a taxi to McDonalds Geuliz and follow me, I'd given her the number of the lad I met in case she had any problems. As we got out at McDonalds she started shouting at me, hardly being discreet asking how far it was, saying it's difficult to walk in heels etc... The police must have clocked on and as soon I walked onto my road a police car pulled up alongside me! I kept on walking as if I needed to be somewhere and the police car pulled further up the road, police got out and asked what I was doing, where I was going, where I was from, where I was staying. Luckily I had my boarding pass on me that I'd printed out earlier
and said "I'm off home mate, I've got a flight in 6 hours so I'm off to bed. He asked to see some ID but I didn't have any on me. He just shrugged his shoulders and left.
I quick stepped back to my apartment rang the lad to see if that girl had been in touch and luckily she had! Ended up getting her number and calling her to find she was in a taxi! Basically where we was walking a shop was open so she went to get a bottle of water and cigarettes, she then called her taxi (who had just dropped her off) to come pick her up again.
Another police car had stopped next to her and had questioned her to which she said she'd been dropped off at McDonalds to get some food, decided she wanted a drink and cigarettes and her taxi was coming to pick her up again. Obviously her taxi then showed up so the police let her go! Smart girl!
Gave her my address and she came over in her taxi. She was the best of the holiday, proper friendly and funny. She wouldn't leave me alone and I ended up not sleeping and having a smoke with her too. Had a few beers left in the fridge. Got to 8am and I told her I had to go, she was like what? Where? Back home!!!
Ended up helping me pack my bag and gave the apartment a quick once over. Got to the airport just in time and made it to my flight.
What a few days. I need another holiday.
