The latest stop on my quest for the ultimate erotic massage, and my first visit one of those ubiquitous Chinese places, which are everywhere in London. (What is the social history of these places? Why are they always run by the Chinese? Is it like Italian knife sharpening businesses? Or French men selling onions? I want to know. Does everyone know what actually goes on in the back? Do lots of people use them for the advertised legitimate services? Does anyone actually buy the ‘herbs’? Do I really care…?)
I was in Cricklewood (not generally recommended). I sneaked into the Herbal Clinic, which is just by the station. I paid £45 for an hour, the madam showed me to a little massage room, I showered, Olivia knocked and walked in. The classic EE sex worker cutie, IMHO. At Bunnies in the Elephant and Castle, I whip my boxers off and it’s game on from the start. Here, I was uncertain – there was a draconian, grammatically challenged sign on the back of the door forbidding sexual services, which made me wonder. So I kept my bits covered. But after ten minutes I asked the question – her answer was to the point. £20 for a happy ending, nothing else on the menu. When I was on the vinegar strokes I asked her if she would do it topless next time - £10 extra.
Pros:
- Slim and pretty
- Boobs looked potentially amazing
- An impressive, comprehensive massage
- Warm and friendly place
Cons
- Minimal erotic content. I like to major on the CC swipes, the anticipatory touches. And the happy ending was a bit lacking in finesse.
- £65 for the hour. I was in and out in less than 60 mins. So a bit pricy.
But Olivia is smoking hot. I like being tossed of by a smoking hot young woman. And reception was super friendly. So this place gets the green light from me.
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