Date: 11th April 2016
Having been a long-time lurker on this website, I decided to treat myself to one of the Phoenix Club's parties the next time I was in London. Well, I was in London last week and took the plunge.
This was my first ever punt in the UK and I wasn't sure how to proceed. I called the number on the website and asked for a space in the 1-3pm session. The lady said 'no problem' and hung up. I was a bit baffled by this but I quickly received a text confirming the booking and the location.
Having made my way to a boozer close to the location of the party (a swift couple of pints to help settle the nerves), I then proceeded to make my way to the party. I arrived dead-on 1pm and was jokingly asked why I was late. Others arrived later than me and I quickly realised that some of the girls were genuinely quite perplexed as to why people were arriving late.
Anyway, I was shown into a room to hang my coat and other clothes up. There was a pretty girl sitting there in her underwear watching re-runs of Saved By The Bell. I was a huge fan of the show as a kid and was sorely tempted to just stay and watch the show instead. However, Kelly Kapowski appeared on screen, gave me a twitch and I quickly jumped into the shower, dried off and headed upstairs.
I went into the room and there were three double beds and a sex swing. Nice. Two guys were already being given a BJ when I was asked if I wanted to party. I don't think I've ever said 'yes' more enthusiastically and promptly took off the dressing gown and jumped onto the bed. 'Oral with or without condom?' I was asked. 'Without, please', I replied. This was the girl who had been watching Saved By The Bell, immediately making her my favourite. She was excellent at giving oral and, after ten mins or so, I asked to switch to a 69. 'Just lick, no fingers in', I was told. Damn. I miss giving girls a good fingering. Never mind. I started to go down on her and thoroughly enjoyed it as her pussy was delicious. I then bent her over and started to fuck her. It's at this point I surveyed the room/competition and realised that there were only four girls and five guys. Not a bad ratio, I thought, but I'd have obviously preferred six girls! Most of them, including the one I was banging, had quite small tits. I'm a big boobs man myself so was slightly disappointed in this. Apologies to anyone reading this review but I also cannot remember for the life of me the names of the girls! I think one was called Jess (who had the biggest tits there but didn't like her pussy licked - shame) and one was called Emily (really short hair, which I find off-putting. Looked like Baz from the Sid the Sexist comic strip in the Viz).
Anyway, I was banging this petite blonde with some guy next to me just sitting, watching it all. I thought this would be off-putting for me but I was actually quite comfortable with it all. After pounding her doggy style and missionary, I decided to take a breather. A touch of man flu meant that I wasn't at 100% but I was determined that it wasn't going to spoil my day.
I rested for a few minutes before getting back amongst the action. Jess started to give me a blow-job, which was brilliant. I asked for a 69 but she refused as she didn't like her pussy being licked. What the f*ck?! Emily happened to be walking by at the time so I asked her to sit on my face instead, thus fulfilling a long-held fantasy about being sucked off by one girl whilst going down on another. Brilliant. After about 10-15 mins of this, I told Emily get lie on her back and duly pounded her in missionary for another 10-15 mins. Again, I was feeling the pace a bit and needed another breather. The last girl there who I'd had no interaction with up until this point beckoned me over to the bed she was on and started giving me a BJ. Again, it was very good and she probably had the second-biggest pair of tits there, which was nice. She also looked like my ex-girlfriend's sister, which was weird. Only this girl was far prettier as my ex's sister is f*cking minging. Anyway, it gave this girl an interesting angle and I clambered on top and started banging her too. She was different to the others in that she seemed a bit more game and started landing some dirty talk, which helped me along to pop no.1. That's when I needed an extended break...
I sat in the chair, sipping some water and watching the others in action. One fella had almost completely disappeared by this point, meaning the ratio was 1:1 - excellent. I waited for about 15-20 mins before rejoining the action. I'd told myself that I would bang every girl in there at least once so only Jess to go. However, I was beaten to her by another guest and had to make do with Baz from the Viz again. I didn't hang around too long before getting a BJ from the first girl I'd encountered when Jess stood behind me, feeling my arse. I wasn't going to miss this opportunity and told her to lie on her back as I wanted to fuck her. She duly obliged and I started banging away whilst the Saved By The Bell girl oddly started licking my nipples. I don't know if this does anything for anyone out there, but it does nothing for me. Anyway, after about 10mins of banging away I had to take another breather. In addition to feeling unwell, the temperature in the room became very hot, very quickly, and I was lathered in sweat. I only waited for a few minutes before climbing onto another bed and received a BJ from Saved By The Bell and my ex's sister, which I thoroughly enjoyed. I started pounding my ex's sister soon afterwards but, again, was struggling for a bit so had her and Jess just pipe me off. One of the knock-on effects of the man flu was that I also struggled to pop all day and they were both sucking away for about 20mins with no end in sight. They both had right arms like Popeye by the end of the day. Anyway, I decided to take over and asked if I could come on their tits. They said yes and I started bashing away at an incredible speed before unloading on their tits. Excellent. This happened minutes before we were due to finish so I was very happy with that. A quick shower, some brief interaction with another punter (this was lacking throughout) and then I left. Valuables had been put into a sealed envelope and I collected them in tact.
Overall, the comms were quick and easy, the girls were, for the most part, pretty and I couldn't think of a better way to spend your money - £160 for two hours of sucking, licking and banging different women? It's a no-brainer. I'd initially thought I'd be apprehensive about having sex in front of other men but you quickly focus on nothing but the women so that wasn't a problem.
I'd thoroughly recommend this place to anyone!
I shall definitely return in the future.
Topic: Phoenix Club - London (Read 1969 times)