Author Topic: CLARISSA, Luton - The Case of the Disappearing Tattoo or Bait & Switch Fraud  (Read 2837 times)


2 review(s) for Clarissa Black X (0 positive, 1 neutral, 1 negative) [Indexed by ]

Offline sumertime

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With an afternoon contract meeting and so not to miss an opportunity to sample the cheaper offerings of Luton,  a morning punt was on the cards. Doing my best to avoid Romanians!, I came across at least three Hungarians offering my level of interest at reasonable cost. The first one I called, Clarissa - and the best looking, was answered immediately by a deep voiced female who confirmed a meeting with Clarissa (First Warning). I arrived at "96 LU3 2PL" spot on the appointed time and spent ages knocking on the door. It was opened by a petite woman in red dress who showed me to a darkened,front room - almost knocked over when a punter from upstairs on a prior booking with "Ramona" was shown the door. Ramona then fully exposed her tanned and voluptuous body and said "you like me?" (Second Warning). I asked where Clarissa was to be told by the first woman that she was her!(Third Warning) I pointed out that she did not look like the AW Profile and that the long tattoo on the right leg was not there.. "But I am Clarissa" she stated. This is where the little fellah takes over and I think "What The Hell, she says she is Hungarian and she dont look bad" (Fouth Warning).  :unknown:  Yes, I should have walked long before the hormones kicked in. £60 passed over for the hour and she disappeared with the loot. On her return I attempted "Welcome cuddle and kiss" to be rebuffed and told to undress and get on bed.. and from there it went downhill.

On the bed, the arse looked ok but as the top came off it was obvious that childbearing had had its toll on the sagging tits and all her interest was in spiting on my erect fellah and giving a fierce hand job and pathetic wet BJ. My mind had now left my body... and after a short uneventful mish my body failed with total lack of interest. After a further bashing BJ trying to raise the uninterested she announced she had to go to toilet. So I am laid there in the buff with a partial when in walks a fully clothed, middle aged frump who announces that she is "Veronique" and that, sadly, was the demise of the little fellah.  :cry:

On Clarissa's return there was more hand action to try and revive the fellah - and maybe just little enough to try side of bed "Goat" - and I noticed the ravages of child birth with excessive stretch marking. A few half hearted prods on a non-responsive body and she says "10 minute left". Now you don't have to be a mathematician to work out "start at 20 mins to the hour and it is now 10 mins past" ain't one hour. But I have had enough, £60 lighter, no happy ending and then off to a shitty contract meeting.  :(

SUMMARY - IT IS A BROTHEL! Not independent WG, Not the girl in the AW Profile! no kiss, no RO, no fingering, no deep throat, no body 2 body massage, virtually no response, very poor English so "no understand" and a great feeling that they are Romanians after all.... screw Luton   :angry:

Here are the other two in the mad house:

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Offline Hertsgent

Sounds like you had a great time  :vomit:

Offline sumertime

Sounds like you had a great time  :vomit:
I have had better days.... but on reflection it could have been a perfect plot for a Brian Rix Farce   ;)

At one point I suggested that they all come in and we would play happy families! She didn't see the funny side and just said that would be more money... Oh well, I need someone to rekindle my faith (and manhood)  :hi:

Offline Jimmyredcab

Sounds like you had a great time  :vomit:

For £60 an hour what do you expect ------------------ pay peanuts get a monkey.    :thumbsdown:

Offline Hertsgent

For £60 an hour what do you expect ------------------ pay peanuts get a monkey.    :thumbsdown:

Now if only price paid were proportional to experience received, then punting would be a massively easier game.....

Offline Jimmyredcab

Now if only price paid were proportional to experience received, then punting would be a massively easier game.....

While I agree that a £200 an hour girl won't be twice as good as a girl charging £100 an hour ------------ you can pretty much guarantee that a £60 an hour girl will be skank quality.     :hi: :hi:

I hear a lot about great girls at £60 an hour -------------- but where the fuck are they.    :unknown:

Online Steve2

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you can pretty much guarantee that a £60 an hour girl will be skank quality.     :hi: :hi:

I hear a lot about great girls at £60 an hour -------------- but where the fuck are they.    :unknown:

You are so right as always Jimbo

 :sarcastic: :sarcastic: :sarcastic: :sarcastic:

Offline smiths

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For £60 an hour what do you expect ------------------ pay peanuts get a monkey.    :thumbsdown:

What a load of completely disproven bollocks of the highest order. :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Offline smiths

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While I agree that a £200 an hour girl won't be twice as good as a girl charging £100 an hour ------------ you can pretty much guarantee that a £60 an hour girl will be skank quality.     :hi: :hi:

I hear a lot about great girls at £60 an hour -------------- but where the fuck are they.    :unknown:

At least get it right redcab. :rolleyes: You labelled EVERY WG who charges under £100 an hour as a skank including the one you did a positive review on yet made no mention she was a skank in the review, only confirming she was after I challenged you, what use was that to punters. :rolleyes: You literally haven't a clue as countless reviews show there are good WGs charging under £100 an hour.

A number of us have had good punts at £60 an hour though in general in my punting area prices have gone up to £80 an hour at least, punters talking prices up doesn't help. :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Offline smiths

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Nationality:    Hungarian   +447407128297

With an afternoon contract meeting and so not to miss an opportunity to sample the cheaper offerings of Luton,  a morning punt was on the cards. Doing my best to avoid Romanians!, I came across at least three Hungarians offering my level of interest at reasonable cost. The first one I called, Clarissa - and the best looking, was answered immediately by a deep voiced female who confirmed a meeting with Clarissa (First Warning). I arrived at "96 LU3 2PL" spot on the appointed time and spent ages knocking on the door. It was opened by a petite woman in red dress who showed me to a darkened,front room - almost knocked over when a punter from upstairs on a prior booking with "Ramona" was shown the door. Ramona then fully exposed her tanned and voluptuous body and said "you like me?" (Second Warning). I asked where Clarissa was to be told by the first woman that she was her!(Third Warning) I pointed out that she did not look like the AW Profile and that the long tattoo on the right leg was not there.. "But I am Clarissa" she stated. This is where the little fellah takes over and I think "What The Hell, she says she is Hungarian and she dont look bad" (Fouth Warning).  :unknown:  Yes, I should have walked long before the hormones kicked in. £60 passed over for the hour and she disappeared with the loot. On her return I attempted "Welcome cuddle and kiss" to be rebuffed and told to undress and get on bed.. and from there it went downhill.

On the bed, the arse looked ok but as the top came off it was obvious that childbearing had had its toll on the sagging tits and all her interest was in spiting on my erect fellah and giving a fierce hand job and pathetic wet BJ. My mind had now left my body... and after a short uneventful mish my body failed with total lack of interest. After a further bashing BJ trying to raise the uninterested she announced she had to go to toilet. So I am laid there in the buff with a partial when in walks a fully clothed, middle aged frump who announces that she is "Veronique" and that, sadly, was the demise of the little fellah.  :cry:

On Clarissa's return there was more hand action to try and revive the fellah - and maybe just little enough to try side of bed "Goat" - and I noticed the ravages of child birth with excessive stretch marking. A few half hearted prods on a non-responsive body and she says "10 minute left". Now you don't have to be a mathematician to work out "start at 20 mins to the hour and it is now 10 mins past" ain't one hour. But I have had enough, £60 lighter, no happy ending and then off to a shitty contract meeting.  :(

SUMMARY - IT IS A BROTHEL! Not independent WG, Not the girl in the AW Profile! no kiss, no RO, no fingering, no deep throat, no body 2 body massage, virtually no response, very poor English so "no understand" and a great feeling that they are Romanians after all.... screw Luton   :angry:

Here are the other two in the mad house:

External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only    

External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only

Sorry to hear about this but thanks for the review. :thumbsup: ALWAYS walk in these situations.

Offline sumertime

Sorry to hear about this but thanks for the review. :thumbsup: ALWAYS walk in these situations.

Always my advice also.... but then it is "do as I say not as I do.."  :unknown:

I will not get into discussion on relative values - enough to say that sometimes I shop at Lidl, sometime I shop at Waitrose but more often than not it is TESCO...  ;)

Just see where the B&S tricked me (and the little fellah!)

       https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=420.msg1095575#msg1095575


Offline 8a8ylon


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At least get it right redcab. :rolleyes: You labelled EVERY WG who charges under £100 an hour as a skank including the one you did a positive review on yet made no mention she was a skank in the review, only confirming she was after I challenged you, what use was that to punters. :rolleyes: You literally haven't a clue as countless reviews show there are good WGs charging under £100 an hour.

A number of us have had good punts at £60 an hour though in general in my punting area prices have gone up to £80 an hour at least, punters talking prices up doesn't help. :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:



In general in my punting area prices have gone up to £80 an hour at least, punters talking prices up doesn't help

You've defo got that one right smiths!