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Donald Trump is a cunt.
Donald Trump is a four-timed bankrupt, smug cunt with a dodgy haircut. Not my views, but those of my mum, a lifelong Democrat – from Kennedy through Clinton and now Obama and I’m sat across from her and I am having the debate with her about the Iowa Caucuses and she is ripping into Trump with enthusiasm and even I am now thinking that Ted Cruz will get fucked over by the right wingers and it will be a straight fight between Hilary and Trump, and God help us if Trump wins out. And I am sat in my mum’s lounge and I look at the picture of John Kennedy on the wall, God rest his soul, and the discussion turns to whether Kennedy’s policies were liberal or conservative and my mum reckons that the modern day conservatives have tried to re-invent Kennedy to one of their own.
But I’m drifting off and losing interest in the topic, and even though she is a mental case Republican, all I can see or think about is Sarah Palin on all fours showing me her lovely arse and she’s pulling her arse cheeks apart and inviting me to give it a good tonging and before I know it I’m thinking about seeking out a hooker that resembles either Hilary Clinton or Sarah Palin, thereby covering all bases across the political spectrum. And I’m interrupted by my mum saying “and another thing…” So I say my goodbye’s to my mum and as I walk out I clock the picture of Gerry Adams next to that of John Kennedy and I reckon that my old mum is about as fucked up in the head as her son.
So I’m straight on the phone to LucieBee, but she has had to leave early and suggests that I give Riley a go – she recommends her to me infact and I ask Lucie whether Riley looks anything like Sarah Palin or whether she has Republican or Democrat tendencies and Lucie replies by saying that Riley has better tits and arse than Sarah Palin and she’s also younger, but if you like Sarah you will love Riley – Lucie is probably thinking ‘right whatever’ and thinking that I’m a right picky old cunt. But it’s all about standards and I could not bring myself to fuck a Donald Trump follower. So the next thing is I’m dialling Riley’s number and she answer’s with some enthusiasm – and she is expecting me and has already had a debrief from LucieBee about the sort of filth I’m into.
And then I’m knocking on the door and Riley answers and fucking hell she looks just the ticket, in a short tartan type skirt skimpy top and geeky glasses and she asks me whether I want the glasses on or off and I ask her to keep them on as they remind me of some of the pictures of Sarah Palin and I’m on the bed and she is starting with a nice blowjob and she is biting my cock and sucking on my balls with great endeavour and enthusiasm and in the excitement of the moment I have almost forgotten about my need to get fucked up on poppers and Riley looks up and reminds me that she wants me fucked up and blue faced before I leave her and she is confidently and assertively instructing me to sniff 4 times in each nostril and I am liking this and actually she has quickly got the hang of it. And she then invites me to eat out her ass and pussy and I am down between her legs and she is lapping it up and telling me that I am a perverted cunt who has to pay girls like her for sex and how she would never look at me in normal life.
And all of this chat is getting me more into this and then I’m on the poppers again under Riley’s instruction and she looks like a lap dancer, tanned, very long legs and fucking awesome figure on her and I am sat there wanking my cock infront of her whilst she goes through a few lap dancer type poses asking me all the time whether looking at her body is making me feel perverted and horny. I love a confident, chippy birds – and by this stage I cannot stand up and I am thinking about Sarah Palin joining us maybe for a the last ten minutes of the booking and I will pay her an extra 20 maybe and Sarah is up for this and she is licking out Riley’s arse and has another 2 fingers wedged in her fanny and I reckon this would be awesome, but then I’m back to reality and Riley is holding the bottle up to my nose and she then show’s me a picture of her mum and she is a fucking stunner as well and I’m wanking myself over the picture of Riley’s mum on the phone and Riley is encouraging me and then she is suggesting that I ring my wife up and tell her I’m going to be late home and I do this and the missus is giving me a long list of items to call and get from Tesco on the way back and at the same time Riley is pulling my balls from behind and biting my cock and I’m having to keep my cool on the phone to the wife and it is quite a task, but I pull it off as I’ve got previous form and experience in this area. And by this time we are approaching the 30 minute mark and guess what Riley says to me you can stay longer if you like, but you will have to pay me more money and fucking hell I love this talk – and she is up for more extended filth and perversity and I love the idea of her suggesting I pay her more money and I am fucking her in the lounge area whilst this conversation is going on and she is making sure that I’m nicely topped up on poppers to the maximum and I have my cock inside her and she is squirming and moving her hips slowly back and forth over my cock.
So actually I stay for pretty much an hour and half in the end and it was fucking awesome. By the end I am so fucked up I cannot honestly remember how I came.
So I walk back to the car and I think about my mental old mum who has been here in the UK since her 20’s and even at her age now she is still a cunt and fucker and thinks that the Holy Trinity is JFK, Clinton and Obama and I start to think about that picture of Gerry Adams with his Open University beard and Guardian reading cord jacket and how it’s difficult to imagine someone who looks as kindly as him sanctioning terrorist atrocities and bombings and murders – but in my mum’s deranged world he is one of the ‘good guy’s. We really are in the mad house.
So whilst reflecting on this madness, I go to Spotify and stick on The Rifles of the IRA by The Wolftones – a song which was played frequently in my house as I was growing up.
