Renata One2One Hatfield

[Siadwel]

Ok, so this was a while ago, back in the summer when my two favourite girlies were away on holiday. It's also a bit academic, in that Renata isn't listed on the One2One roster anymore. It's the same Renata as featured by Phoenix Parties, so here's her link, FWIW.

External Link/Members Only

She was using the same photos as on the Phoenix site, so I booked her for an hour, one day when she was in Hatfield.

First of all, she bears absolutely no resemblance to her photos. I'm thinking they were taken a *long* time ago. Shorter hair, more tanned than the photos, and lumpier, for want of a better word. It's definitely her, we talked about Phoenix and about parties in general while I was getting dressed and wondering why I'd blown £130 on her. Very plain, almost unattractive, no effort in presentation, dress or service. No make-up, no Full Metal Hooker Wear.

Plastic, unconvincing, 'Ooh, baby', 'Yeah, baby', 'Right there, baby'.......the only thing missing was 'Don't stop, baby', probably because she was afraid I wouldn't. OWO, RO on offer but I didn't stay down there long, got scared.  Sex in various and CIM. Kissing might be on the menu, but I only kiss my two favourites, end of story. I generally know where they've been, if you get my meaning, and they both always taste of fresh mouthwash, which is cool.

Perfunctory, mechanical, soulless.......not surprised she's off the One2One list. Nowhere near the same level of service as Suzi Li, Danish Jenny (not to be confused with Girlfriend Jenny) or SexyJet, the other One2One's I've seen.

Maybe she perks up in a party situation, she did open up and talk quite animatedly about Phoenix and parties, but in a 1-2-1, I was disappointed.

What are you moaning about, I hear you all say. Well, yes, I got fucked, sucked and she took it in the mouth like a trooper, but so did Jet, so do Suzi and Danish Jenny (again, not to be confused with Girlfriend Jenny) and so do my two favourites.

You know, those times when you get back in the car and drive away and feel like nothing's happened except you've parted with a wad of hard-earned?

This was one of those times. Mark it down. Chalk it up. Move on.

 

[Badvicar]

Good man Mr S. Honest review, with an honest conclusion. A  pop in the chops on its own , doesn't make a positive review, if the punt was not holistically satisfying.

[Siadwel]

No, it certainly does not, Vicar.

Luckily, the memory has been, very nearly, completely expunged with the excellent and willing help of a certain young Romanian lady of this parish.

More tea?

[Badvicar]

And which lady of the parish are we talking about? Girlfriend Jenny? Does she provide the necessary tea and lemon drizzle cake?

[Hertsgent]

Useful review Siadwel - you seem to have the same desire to see all the one to one girls that I do with the Hatfield supermarket flat girls  You're obviously a bit more upmarket than me !

[Siadwel]

Closer to me by about half a mile. Every little helps in these straitened times.

The other three I've seen are Good Girls. I was working on the basis that the first bad one would be the last one.

Mission Accomplished,as they say.

[Siadwel]

And which lady of the parish are we talking about? Girlfriend Jenny? Does she provide the necessary tea and lemon drizzle cake?

Have you not drunk of that particular cup, Vicar? You should, for it is intoxicating.

[Badvicar]

She's been top of the order of ceremony for the while, must try harder to break bread!

[Siadwel]

She's been top of the order of ceremony for the while, must try harder to break bread!

Logged on to my HL today (as you do), and said young lady's profile had rocketed up the list, so I checked to see what she'd changed.....maybe some new photos 

No new photo's  but this quote, 'Just gentleman's over 35 years old please.'. She also says she's going to write a blog about why she prefers guys over 35.

She's told me more than once that she doesn't really enjoy bookings with guys of her own age group. Quite surprised me, that did. I would have thought all girls would prefer someone young (20's), fit, lots of stamina and all their own teeth and hair, just the same as we'd mostly prefer younger, fit girlies. Especially girls who enjoy the sex too, as does Jenny. One of very few instances in this life when I've been glad to be well over 35.

Or maybe it's her way of reducing 'footfall to her premises', as the marketing suits would say.

Hope that doesn't rule you out, Vicar.

[Hertsgent]

I had that conversation recently too - great to be over 35 isn't it  I'm thinking I'm a younger client now......

[Badvicar]

Thanks for the heads up Siadwel, I just about make it over the line to see her then still! A girlfriend jenny would do me right now. In a Days inn in Scotland getting battered by weather and what has to be the worse selection of lady lovely outlets anywhere....my god worse than Luton.

[Badvicar]

She has appeared on Songs of Praise, so I would get special dispensation anyway! Bloody hell that could be awkward, though, If I was her vicar.

[Siadwel]

Thanks for the heads up Siadwel, I just about make it over the line to see her then still! A girlfriend jenny would do me right now. In a Days inn in Scotland getting battered by weather and what has to be the worse selection of lady lovely outlets anywhere....my god worse than Luton.

Sounds like a fate worse than a fate worse than death.

It sound's a horrible place, but someone has to be there. Rather you than me, and I mean that most sincerely.

 

[Hertsgent]

Thanks for the heads up Siadwel, I just about make it over the line to see her then still! A girlfriend jenny would do me right now. In a Days inn in Scotland getting battered by weather and what has to be the worse selection of lady lovely outlets anywhere....my god worse than Luton.

Ah, Scotland - a place where even the weather is battered 

[Badvicar]

And now its fucking flooded. Thanks Desmond.

[vt]

And now its fucking flooded. Thanks Desmond.

Named after the retired Anglican Archbishop of Cape Town I believe...not the sort of legacy a man of Peace & Reconciliation would want!