Oh dear. Oh dear, oh dear.
Today, I ventured outside of the M25 for the first time in years. (Apart from the occasional flirtation with Surrey Gems, which is basically ‘HOD 3’). And my lustful eyes settled upon 'Anya' in sunny Colchester, which was on my work route. Her AW profile is a doozy – 248 people surely can't all be wrong. And she has some good notices here.
But from the moment she chastised me for pressing the wrong button on the entry panel – not, I hasten to add, in a way that caused her any problems - I sensed I was in trouble. Shoes off on entry – fair enough – but the way she moved them from one side of the corridor to the other, tutting all the while, made my heart sink yet further. And sure enough - in the bedroom it was the classic ‘Romanian Dead Fish’ performance. No touching of the breasts, no touching of the belly button, no this, no that. A total absence of any activity which could be described as sensual. I could go on, but to be honest, I can’t be bothered.
I mean – come on, Anya. These girls usually have me like a tent pole inside 60 seconds. With Anya, I was desperately trying to conjure up a hard-on after ten minutes, so I could fuck her and get out.
At what point does a meeting with a prostitute actually no longer qualify as a punt?
I guess I did fuck her, so that makes it a punt. But to be honest, it was like spending some ‘one on one’ time with a dirty magazine and a box of Kleenex. But a magazine that cost £90.
For sure, she looks like a porn star, with blown up lips and blown up boobs. Good enough to get me going in another context. And her performance wasn’t quite as appalling as some of the low life skanks I have seen back in the day.
But it’s a big, fat, red negative from me. Punters of Essex – you clearly like her, so you are welcome to her.
For the record – decent, anonymous flat in a big block. Nice hot shower. Er…that’s it!
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Topic: Anya_BOMBSHELL - Colchester (Read 2699 times)