My strangest punt to date, I seem to have morphed into an amalgam of a couple of Little Britain characters - -
Anyway, Ringer's recent review
https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=453332.0
and Blackvanman's comment (for which thanks to both) awakened an itch in me to revisit Diane
External Link/Members Only having been a couple of times a few years back. Comms were straightforward. I contacted early in the morning for an hour's appointment that afternoon. March is a bit of a step for me (see what I did there) and roadworks near her estate delayed me by a few minutes but house is straightforward to find and I parked on drive in front of her car. I guess a few neighbours would be able to see comings and goings but didn't bother me.
She'd told me she would be in the garden so I went through side gate to find her and we went into the house, which is a fairly modern, tidy, detached place. As we went up the stairs I saw that the rail for a stairlift was still on the wall. I recall she'd previously said this was for her husband who passed a number of years ago, but even so you're in no doubt that you're in an elderly person's home.
Diane is around the 5ft mark and I think must be early 80s but I guess 75-80 is possible, I don't think it really matters: once you accept that you're going to be wanked by an old lady, the exact age seems irrelevant to me. So got upstairs to the massage room and I stripped off, she took off her blouse and pulled down the top of a swimsuit(?) to reveal decent-sized breasts which were pert and firm with nipples pointing skyward
. OK they were the sagging breasts of an 80-ish year old woman but still enjoyable to see. We went through to the bathroom where she gave my cock a little wash at the basin, keeping up a running commentary along the lines of:
"Ooh he's quite lively already isn't he".
Her being short and me being tall she only needed to bend over a little to give a little bit of oral, interspersed with "Is that nice?" "
He likes that". etc. A bit of rubbing between and over her tits as well.
Back to the massage room and I can't remember if I started on my back or front but she soon said it was so hot in the house should we go into the garden. Remembering BVM's experience I was up for it so went downstairs and through to the garden, all the time with cock at full mast. The house is on a modern estate and I couldn't quite believe the garden wouldn't be overlooked, but the 6ft fences seemed to do a good enough job for me to sit out in the middle of the lawn in a wicker chair, still fully erect, waiting for her to emerge with the massage oil. She sat opposite and started massaging my cock but soon said she liked to watch a man masturbate, which I think is just her way to avoid too much exertion, but I obliged, getting her to show her pussy and peel her labia apart to give me something to focus on.
I asked about FS but she said "
No, you're not nearly as attractive as Blackvanman". Well anyway, she said she didn't do it, so I didn't press the point. It takes me a while to cum but she helped me over the line with a bit of anal stimulation, all accompanied by a mix of mildly dirty talk and asking if I was close, which is a bit of a turn-off for me, but never mind. Job done we went back upstairs for quick wash.
I've still not quite decided how to view the experience, but it was definitely memorable.
Oh and I think it was £80 for the hour
