Truly as bad as it gets.
WhereBelgrave Gate Leicester -
External Link/Members Only. An awful location opposite a bus station and a set of traffic lights, I stood waiting to be let in with a full double decker bus peering at me.
WhenEnd of November 25, a Sunday afternoon
CommsThe only positive thing to note here, slick and efficient with good English. Did hugely oversell what was to come...
The Girl"Luna, 26, full of Eastern promise and a size 6." Literally none of that was true unless the promise was to be disappointed by an unenthusiastic girl, approx. 40 and a size 12 if I'm being generous.
The MeetAfter standing for what felt like hours at the green side gate with the bus staring at the back of my head, I was let in by the mamasan and walked down a long dark alleyway to a room behind the adjacent Chinese Health Shop. Immediate alarm bells as it was cold, dark and damp with plasterwork falling off the wall and the remainder being held in place by mould. Genuinely should have walked out there and then but gave it the benefit of the doubt as the massage might be decent.
Came face to face with Luna, more disappointment. I appreciate all of the shops lie about the girls age but the Chinese are the worst offenders, she was 26 a long time ago and no amount of make up was tricking me into thinking otherwise. I paid £50 for the 1hr massage and got my kit off, onto the cold massage table in the still cold room. I did ask if there was any more heating, she pointed to a single oil heater and said no. She spoke poor English so at least I didn't feel awkward about being quiet.
The massage was poor, a proper Mr Miyagi job, with no effort or technique to be discerned at all. As expected, offers on the T/O and after a week away with work, I opted for a £20 H/E thinking this might save the day. Wrong again, I doubt she could shake ketchup from the bottle. After 10 minutes of fumbling, she got what she hoped for and now only 45 minutes in, I got the arse and decided enough was enough. I got dressed and on the way out, the mamasan was keen to sell me the virtues of a new girl every 2 weeks.
Genuinely, save yourself the effort with this one and look elsewhere.
