Lyraforest - Hackney

[Heph]

Lyra Forest
Hackney
Incall

External Link/Members Only
2Hrs £500

I wanted to go to town on this with a hatchet-job, but I'll satisfy myself with, by my standards, an abbreviated account.
TLDR: Chaotic, confused, boho-student and sometimes dopey cam-girl, in well above her pay-grade. Has charm but is a drag to deal with, chips away at your time and will spam you with offers of pics for sale. Swerve.

Comms
Disastrously poor - truly inept: she had the greatest difficulty keeping track of our pre-meet correspondence, even where references in our thread were no more than a few minutes old and abundantly clear. Then, having arranged an agreeable time, she subsequently put it back on several occasions, due to, variously, oversleeping, feeling groggy, 'need to get myself ready', 'need something to eat'. Deeply unimpressive, rank-amateur behaviour.

Venue
A mate's Air BnB rental: almost certainly a social housing sub-let- the girls (she shared with another), and they are evidently both utter domestic slobs.

The gal
My guess is that she's from a nice, middle-class background, somewhere on the outskirts of London. Per the current pics, Lyra is a pretty, slender slip of a gal, with something of a so-called alternative look. The portraits are accurate and recent. I fancied something young, smol-boobed, leggy, pale and skinny. Despite having risen only a few hours into the recent mid-afternoon, she was dressed in some well-worn bdsm-adjacent gear. On top of what I'd aver is a naturally languid disposition, she appeared to be stoned. She's quite clever, and notwithstanding her scattiness before, during and after the meeting, I daresay she could be quite charming, good company, if she was sober and put her mind to it.

The first little while was spent getting the measure of her, and my deciding if her manner of a startled tortoise struggling to find its bearings warranted my bailing-out, not least because I was genuinely concerned she may not have been fit to be a judge of herself. However, she was periodically lucid enough in the ensuing conversation to assuage most of my doubts on that score. She evidently believes she is some kind of 'streaming personality', and 'doesn't do this sort of thing that often' - standard lines, however true in part they may be. There began what I guess might've become a lengthy discourse on her favourite periods of architecture and (bonus!) poetry, if I'd wanted to hear any of that. Reader, I did not.

The next annoyances were her inability to remember how long the booking was for, at what time it started and would therefore end, and, staggeringly, to be able to calculate the basic arithmetic of her bill of fare - a very straightforward time & rate calculation, and one which, naturally, most prossies know off-by-heart: not our Lyra, though. She further confused herself by misremembering my arrival time, trying to upsell me (see below), and calculate what all of this would amount to. She seemed reluctant to accept my account of it being [X minutes x Hourly rate], and felt she had to take ask her flatmate for assurance it was correct. I hid my lack of amusement, but savour the telling of her dopey dip-shittery now.

Events
You'll see that her profile offers Bareback and Unprotected Sex up front - for clarity I'm not averse to this under the certain circumstances, and shan't be taking or entertaining grandstanding objections to it, other than to say, whilst there are such occasions for me, this was not one of them. I oftentimes opt for someone who I can feel assured is prepared to liberally indulge in some penetration-free slip-sliding on me - and that's why I chose Lyra.

I'll say this about the cavorting that we had- once I'd eventually liberated her from the restrictions of her corset- it was all rather enjoyable as far as it went; though mostly on the strength of her appearance and attractiveness to me, as opposed to any great application of effort or skill on her part or mine. At my request, she mounted my chest, the better than I could appreciate the sight of her shaved pudenda. A note on which, she has a slightly unusual condition thereabouts- I'd say it was something akin to vitiligo- at any rate, the outward characteristics are similar enough, in that parts of the skin on her outer and inner labia were a strikingly bright pink, in haphazard local patterns and in contrast to the surrounding skin. Peculiar, but since a thorough look produced nothing of concern, not off-putting. Off went I to the races. There was some brief reciprocation from her, followed by some w/s, on me, thence to the rubbing I so enjoy and was there for.

This was all going well enough, her astride me; me behind her and, at last, her prone and legs invitingly agape under me, but here I have mixed feelings - not at the sights or the invitingly tempting sounds of her encouragement - we all, I assume, love to hear a young woman repeatedly urging us to take them, to fuck them, and to say 'I want you to raw me and fill me with your spunk', 'I want it dripping out of my cunt' - all this was very much to my liking, and would that more would say the same. But what was off-putting, over the next half-an-hour of what I was content should remain only me teasing myself (and her), was the several accompanying re-attempts at upselling, mid-flagrante, viz- 'It only costs an extra £000'; 'I normally charge x to cum inside me'. Again, I'll stress that this is no faux-outrage from me at the dicey proposal itself, rather just the unbidden and pitifully clumsy huckstermanship. Anyway- congress concluded, satisfactorily, some while after, with though I do disapprovingly recall that she demurred on a request for a second bout of OWO on me.

There's one other thing that's worth recounting: in another, less irritatingly disorganised and ditzy appointment, it would probably have been quite amusing that mid way through, her flatmate knocked at the door and asked if she could use the adjoining bathroom, to take a post-breakfast dump. As it was, it was the occasion for another belated check that her flat-mate had got Lyra's hourly rate right and to clarify what her additional charges for unprotected sex were. Double not-impressed.

Summary
Lyra several times afterwards told me that she was on heavy medication for a long-term medical condition (unelated to sexual health), and that this explained her 'out-of-it-ness'. I partly accept this, but for a number of reasons, I also think she's a very poor organiser, partly a result of her youth (c. 26-28) but mostly the lifestyle she chooses and social circles she moves in. She's attractive and appealing in lots of ways, and if she approached her business more seriously and respectfully of others, especially their time, there'd be more to commend her for and this review would have every chance of being an enthusiastic positive for her. Whilst I enjoyed some frolics over the couple of hours in her company, this was not £500 well-spent by me. I'd be more ambivalent if the price had been £300, which, relative to others in her field, is more in her range and skill-set.

Oh, and I should say that she'll think nothing of hitting you up with unsolicited messages for 'contributions to her health' and 'naughty pics of her- only £25, tee-hee!' etc. Yaaaaawwn!

Conclusion
I shall not be returning, and can't advocate that you trouble yourself to enquire after an introduction to her either.

[TwoFacePrideWellGaugeFlex]

How did you manage a booking with her? I've seen her profile for a while but she seems completely inactive. Have reached out to no response.

[Heph]

As you'll have garnered from the review, I genuinely think this may be a blessing in disguise for you. Her last AW log-in was 03/09, though she's been touting for business more recently than that. From memory, the original contact was a fairly normal AW direct message - albeit I'll probably have put a bit of effort to make the prospect attractive to her. It then took a while to organise, given that, although she's literate in some respects, her attention span is like a toddler's, and despite apparently 'making tons of money' from her streaming hustle, it seemed likely that she's financially chaotic, and would experience difficulty organising things like paying bills and for accommodation.

Another add on, if it's useful to you, is that she spent a good deal of our getting-to-know-you chat making a pitch for a 'romantic older man to take care of me' - so she's possibly giving her attention to sugar daddy stuff.

Bon chance!

[PLeisure]

Thanks for such an entertaining review - too bad she's such a ditz 

Ever since you made this comment in a review for her work-mate, "BritishParis" I've wondered if there was room for improvement:

I met her, but not in a booking with her - she was work-buddying up with another, whose name for the moment escapes me... Lyra, perhaps? - who may have since quit the game, a review of whom may ensue if I can establish whether she's still in the biz or not.

In short, they were sharing a working flat and 'BritishParis' urgently needed to pee and knocked on the door asking permission to pass through our romp en route to the en suite. When her bladder had finally emptied, we had a brief chat - Lyra was especially ditzy that day and was truly flummoxed by how much my request to extend another half hour might add to her fee and needed Paris' help with the arithmetic. She was also keen to upsell to bb throughout - they both offer it, and from memory, she asked/pushed for it 3 times.

It would seem not !

[Heph]

Thanks for such an entertaining review - too bad she's such a ditz 

Ever since you made this comment in a review for her work-mate, "BritishParis" I've wondered if there was room for improvement: 
It would seem not !

Well connected and found! Yes - BritishParis- I'd forgotten her name. Lyra is indubitably the more conventionally pretty of the two, and is 'nice' (see appended quote), despite the negative of my review here, which mostly relates to her thoughtless disregard for her customers' time. Paris is, at least from my brief interaction with her, likely the more stable, together and organised of the two - and from what I can see from her AW profile, they still seem to be working together, or at least in close proximity to one another.

Truth told, she's actually a lovely, sweet-natured and clever gal, if, as I pointed out earlier, also quite ditzy in some respects, and an absolutely terrible, disorganised time-keeper.

For further clarity, something which isn't evident from my hurried and un-proof-read review, Lyra's reluctance to engage in a second bout of OWO was during the first (and only) romp, perhaps after Paris's unwelcome intrusion- and not on a second round. My instinct was that having smeared my member with her own-brand lube and having pissed all over it too, she didn't much fancy the prospect of her own taste.