Fallen out with a regular of 25 years

[Jujy78]

Thanks guys for the advise. I'm thinking she may have had a bad day and obviously I was having one too so I didn't bother replying back. When I'm ready I think I'll drop her a message if she doesn't respond or she's blocked me then sod it. It was good whilst it lasted. I'm not losing sleep or going into depression about it and I'm fully aware it was a professional relationship. just wanted to air it out as 25 years is a long time to know someone. I've seen her through my youth till an old man with a pot belly 😂 I've known her longer than my wife 😂

Also to me a regular is someone you see more than once and continue to see her. I don't think how frequently you see her matters. But that's just my take on it.

And I have had local regulars before 2 stand out that I used to see very frequently twice a month for about 3-4 years then they stopped working. So I'm ok with that. This one stands out as it's 25 years and that's a bloody lifetime lol

[Lou2019]

Also to me a regular is someone you see more than once

That’s definitely not the definition of a regular. If you saw them more than once with a five-year gap in between for example that certainly isn’t considered regular in this game.

[finn5555]

Looks like you're paying for the complete GFE, grief and stress included

Fuck em and forget em is the right way, they say the right things to reel you in but ultimately all they want is your cash and rightly so.

It’s purely transactional as simple as that 

[Watts.E.Dunn]

Bloody hell don't you realize that all women are a cost, always have always will be since natherdral man draged one into his cave!.

Escorts have cost me nowhere near as much as the long  time reg, she was a fortune in the Div---orce!...

[akauya]

The definition of a regular is a common and problematical discussion with sex work. IMO this arises as 'regular' is not an ideal broad term to use but has become widely accepted.

...

A much better term IMO would be a repeat customer. Repeat custom is normally highly valued financially in most spheres, but that custom may be random and not follow a regular pattern. Valued customers are not always equally valued though for a variety of reasons including non financial ones. Sex work is no different.

This reminds me of Brazilian girls who call their repeat customers "Retornos" which I always found cute and funny. And yes, they value them highly.

There is definitely EAS at play here. Starting a thread about it is usually a sure sign. Perhaps she also thought so and this was an attempt to restore reality or even end it?

I thought this too.

[Thephoenix]

Just another thing to add to the mix.

The consensus is that the 'relationship' meant more to the OP then the SP.

Nothing necessarily wrong with that If he was happy with the arrangement AND happy to pay.

It's apparent that for the OP, those annual visits gradually became  much more than a paid for encounter.
That doesn't seem to be the case for the SP.

 It maybe tempting for us to think that when we return  to see a lady after a long break, and we're met like a long lost friend with hugs and remenisences of past meetings etc, that she's got a great memory and we've obviously created a lasting impression, even though she may have seen 100 clients since then

It's s more likely that she's kept your contact details with appropriate notes for future meetings.
It's what any professional business woman would do.
I wonder what notes we all have written about us over the years.

[MLawro93]

Just another thing to add to the mix.

The consensus is that the 'relationship' meant more to the OP then the SP.

Nothing necessarily wrong with that If he was happy with the arrangement AND happy to pay.

It's apparent that for the OP, those annual visits gradually became  much more than a paid for encounter.
That doesn't seem to be the case for the SP.

 It maybe tempting for us to think that when we return  to see a lady after a long break, and we're met like a long lost friend with hugs and remenisences of past meetings etc, that she's got a great memory and we've obviously created a lasting impression, even though she may have seen 100 clients since then

It's s more likely that she's kept your contact details with appropriate notes for future meetings.
It's what any professional business woman would do.
I wonder what notes we all have written about us over the years.

Just good business practice. I do it all the time for work as well.  Just a quick brush up before any immediate meeting.

[Fuzzyduck]

Just good business practice. I do it all the time for work as well.  Just a quick brush up before any immediate meeting.

It's a little disturbing sometimes when a SP refers to something I told them once. Particularly when that happens to be a porky pie.

[Cheltclient]

Just another thing to add to the mix.

The consensus is that the 'relationship' meant more to the OP then the SP.

Nothing necessarily wrong with that If he was happy with the arrangement AND happy to pay.

It's apparent that for the OP, those annual visits gradually became  much more than a paid for encounter.
That doesn't seem to be the case for the SP.

 It maybe tempting for us to think that when we return  to see a lady after a long break, and we're met like a long lost friend with hugs and remenisences of past meetings etc, that she's got a great memory and we've obviously created a lasting impression, even though she may have seen 100 clients since then

It's s more likely that she's kept your contact details with appropriate notes for future meetings.
It's what any professional business woman would do.
I wonder what notes we all have written about us over the years.

Yeah I don’t think the OP did anything wrong. It can be so easy to think there is a bit more to the relationship and in the past, I’ve almost fallen into this trap myself. When an SP is super friendly and passionate and quite blase about timekeeping, with flirty messages in between bookings, it’s easy to think there’s something more or something special. But invariably, you soon realise that it’s all about the money. And if we are honest, that’s exactly how it should be. We are not paying to date them and they are not looking to date us. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries.

Personally, I wouldn’t message this SP again, unless the OP can shake off his misconceptions, accept her rules around late cancellations, and really would like to see her again. If he can - great. If those are her rules and she is clear about it, she’s probably not done anything wrong either. I still think after 25 years though, she could have been a little less robust.

I would just go and experience some hot young options - have some fun.

[stevesucks69]

Thanks guys for the advise. I'm thinking she may have had a bad day and obviously I was having one too so I didn't bother replying back. When I'm ready I think I'll drop her a message if she doesn't respond or she's blocked me then sod it. It was good whilst it lasted. I'm not losing sleep or going into depression about it and I'm fully aware it was a professional relationship. just wanted to air it out as 25 years is a long time to know someone. I've seen her through my youth till an old man with a pot belly 😂 I've known her longer than my wife 😂

Also to me a regular is someone you see more than once and continue to see her. I don't think how frequently you see her matters. But that's just my take on it.

And I have had local regulars before 2 stand out that I used to see very frequently twice a month for about 3-4 years then they stopped working. So I'm ok with that. This one stands out as it's 25 years and that's a bloody lifetime lol

   Just an idea, sort out the comms and move on from client, tell her next time you go up just meet up as friends and  go for food or something.   
Seems to me you want to keep contact but its not about the sex for you with her. (Yes guys don't shoot me down here!)
If she goes with it just book a cheap place to stay on your own have food etc let her show you the place.  If you want to have a nice place go for it too.
She obviously means something to you in a friendship way, if she goes for it perhaps she thinks of you that way too. Could lead to just a place to visit a friend and perhaps even stay at hers too (spare room lol)
If she doesn't go for it you've lost nothing

[stevesucks69]

This is a wake up call though. No judgment from me as it’s easy to feel like you are special for an escort. Dare I say it, I think some deliberately cultivate this to keep you hooked. I’d say the best escorts provide a great service but keep that boundary that it is transactional and although friendly in comms, also keep boundaries there. Not only is that better for them but it’s also better for the client. Like you, I crave a bit more of a connection but it’s sensible to remind yourself that this is a transaction.

Although, having seen her for 25 years and with the perceived connection you’ve described, I think this is really poor from her and it’s a stark and unpleasant reminder.  I would not see her again. If she is so rigid with the transactional side of the arrangement, demanding a cancellation fee, then she shouldn’t have allowed you to think you had this connection. She would have known how she came across and probable that you saw this as something a bit more.

  Whilst I don't disagree its equally possible that the SP has taken time off their main job that the OP has referred to and it may be unpaid. We all need that money after all.  We only have one side to this story

[JontyR]

Out of interest OP what would have been your reaction if on cancellation she'd said, "I'm sorry to mention this but I've just made a commitment to pay for my grnaddaughter's school trip on the basis of your booking. I wouldn't normally claim on the cancellation clause for someone long standing like yourself but I felt sure that you would fulfil your booking"

We don't always know the impact of our actions on others.

[Jujy78]

Out of interest OP what would have been your reaction if on cancellation she'd said, "I'm sorry to mention this but I've just made a commitment to pay for my grnaddaughter's school trip on the basis of your booking. I wouldn't normally claim on the cancellation clause for someone long standing like yourself but I felt sure that you would fulfil your booking"

We don't always know the impact of our actions on others.

If she made an excuse and needed the money then that's fine. I wouldve just probably paid up.

Tbh I probably would've replied there and then but it's the way the text came and on top of that I had my own stress that cars broken down and how much it'll cost me to repair.

Personal information removed.

[Lou2019]

And you’re sharing her private business because ??? What a dick move  You seem over invested, EAS? leave the poor woman alone and move on Jesus wept 

[JontyR]

If she made an excuse and needed the money then that's fine. I wouldve just probably paid up.

This answers the question I asked, thank you.

Tbh I probably would've replied there and then but it's the way the text came and on top of that I had my own stress that cars broken down and how much it'll cost me to repair.

This however is you proving you are butthurt. And are trying to justify it.

Pay her the money, or don't. (By rights if it is on her profile then it applies, your "status" or not.) But that's your decision and yours alone.

I'd say if you want to see her again then pay up, quickly and without fuss. She still may refuse you in the future, but that's her perogative. It may however give you the "preferred client" status you crave.

[sammathy]

Others who I might see more often have raised their fees and expected me to pay it, for those not earning their due that meant a parting of ways.

I've had this happen quite a lot recently, and have always wondered what causes it? Perhaps I accidentally revealed something to her that made her think I was richer than she first thought? Most ridiculous one was £300p/h to £5k overnight sessions only "because I'm busier now babe". Politely responded that I couldn't afford her anymore and to get back in contact if anything changed.

he has already mentioned staying into off the clock, unpaid time. She may think she has already been generous.

I completely agree. I think some of us punters mistake staying extra into unpaid time as the girl liking us a little bit extra. Not neccessarily. Sometimes we're just a well paying customer that she doesn't want to rock the boat with.

[Jujy78]

And you’re sharing her private business because ??? What a dick move  You seem over invested, EAS? leave the poor woman alone and move on Jesus wept 

chill out mate.. I'm not exposing her in any way.  If I wanted to expose her I wouldve shared her AW profile which I didn't. Someone even asked for it here.

[daviemac]

chill out mate.. I'm not exposing her in any way.  If I wanted to expose her I wouldve shared her AW profile which I didn't. Someone even asked for it here.

Private information has no place on here that's why it's been removed. There's no way you can guarantee her name will not come out.

[Jujy78]

Private information has no place on here that's why it's been removed. There's no way you can guarantee her name will not come out.

That's fine no probs I was just trying to make a point to the person I was replying to. Although I muddled up the dates and the areas.

[sammathy]

I'd say if you want to see her again then pay up, quickly and without fuss.

I think that's quite harsh. No harm in messaging her and arranging to meet, without mentioning the cancellation fee, just to check her temperature. There was emotion involved from OP's side so he doesn't have to be completely cold and transactional. I just think he shouldn't expect permanence, which it seems he has tried to pursue. Just go with the flow, keep things light-hearted and have fun!

[Lou2019]

chill out mate.. I'm not exposing her in any way.  If I wanted to expose her I wouldve shared her AW profile which I didn't. Someone even asked for it here.

I ain’t your mate and clearly you was trying to expose her with that information hence Davie removing it  you are clearly bitter and trying to damage her reputation, just move on “mate”

[Cheltclient]

I ain’t your mate and clearly you was trying to expose her with that information hence Davie removing it  you are clearly bitter and trying to damage her reputation, just move on “mate”

I have a funny feeling he may not have realised you were a provider, hence the mate. Not defending anyone, but I did think that when I saw it.

I also didn’t see what he posted. But whenever it was, seemed naive (at a stretch). I would have thought everyone knows not to share personal information

[Lou2019]

I have a funny feeling he may not have realised you were a provider, hence the mate. Not defending anyone, but I did think that when I saw it.

I also didn’t see what he posted. But whenever it was, seemed naive (at a stretch). I would have thought everyone knows not to share personal information

It’s quite clear I’m a SP why are you trying to justify his actions/posts?

[Cheltclient]

It’s quite clear I’m a SP why are you trying to justify his actions/posts?

Not going to get into an argument about it. Was just a casual observation. If you took offence, genuine apologies. Wasn’t my intention.

[JontyR]

I think that's quite harsh. No harm in messaging her and arranging to meet, without mentioning the cancellation fee, just to check her temperature. There was emotion involved from OP's side so he doesn't have to be completely cold and transactional. I just think he shouldn't expect permanence, which it seems he has tried to pursue. Just go with the flow, keep things light-hearted and have fun!

I stand by what I said. He seems very "invested" in this SP. EAS has been mentioned and its easy to see why. Therefore if he does want to maximise the opportunity to see her again then my suggestion stands. Any messaging may be perceived by the SP as further potential timewasting.

Your suggestion would have been a preferred option if he had sought to rearrange rather than cancel outright. His (presumably) previous reliability would have counted in his favour.

Your point about permanence is well made though. He's got his silver anniversary with this provider, that's some record that will be beyond most punters given how the industry burns through providers. Nothing lasts forever, especially in punting.

I also sort of wonder, what the SPs and OPs attitude has been to rates and rate increases over the years.

[Bonker]

Ah, this subject has endless fascination for us. Across the spectrum from FEAFE to EAS, many of us have strayed too far to the right. More punters than the punted, it seems to me.

The act is too close to intimacy for us all to treat it as transactional, all of the time.

Over the years, I've drawn a line and try not to cross it. It's become easier as I've grown older,  partly because I'm an ugly old git and my mirror tells me no WG would find me attractive.

I'll finish with a poignant reply to a previous question. How much is frequent? One more than twoquent

[scutty brown]

What is interesting it that he's been a member here since 2018, has been visiting her for 25 years, but seemingly never reviewed her.
Is that because he didn't think of her as a service provider until this recent episode forced him to re-evaluate their relationship?

[Lucky Luciano]

This appears to be your favourite SP and appear to have a real connection. If it was me I would offer to pay the cancellation fee prior to requesting any further booking. But yes you would think that as you’ve known each other for many many years, she would waiver the fee. You don’t expect VIP treatment but being a very long standing regular must count for something!!

[Knny]

Text back saying that you will pay the cancellation fee on the next visit, however, the next visit will be a while.  Then see her after a prolonged period and only if you succumb to the itch of seeing her again.

You obviously were a 'good' customer given that she hasn't rushed you in the past.   Good, but not valued.  I'd be thankful for this reality check because it would have quashed my EAS. 

Seek a new regular.

[Blackpool Rock]

I've refrained from posting until now so -

She's got pissy with you at the drop of a hat which sound more like a wife or GF than the special long term relationship / understanding that you thought you had

I can understand travelling a long way occasionally to see someone who you like seeing as a special punt but by the sound of it she doesn't appreciate the effort you are going to compared to a punter around the corner

Anyway ultimately as has been posted on here many times don't most of us pay to walk away afterwards WITHOUT all the shit and baggage 

[Clarence Boddicker]

This could all be so much simpler, you said you you were stressed that day, perhaps she was too.  Easiest thing to do is try to book her again. You want to see her, just make a booking, thats how it's always worked, if there's still an issue you'll soon know about it. The more pertinent question is, if you're catching the feels, should you be trying to make a booking in the first place. 

[Cheltclient]

It probably is simple really. You’ve had the wake up call. The special relationship you thought you had was a myth. Over 25 years and as a client, she prob likes you more than the average client, and probably treats you a bit better, but not to the extent that it’s also anything other than a transaction. Now, you did something that fell foul of her rules, and as you are only a client, she has enforced her rules. With the bubble burst, and with the knowledge that despite 25 years of a business relationship, you are still very much a client, do you still want to see her? If you do, book her. But if that mythical relationship was what enticed you to keep going back, don’t.

[Thehatedone]

I have one girl atm I have EAS for
I see her often when I can make some time while I work it out of my system (which hasnt been going great)
She caught me off guard one day
Not sure what triggered it but I think it was a time I asked for something that wasnt on her enjoys list
Nothing wild
But something she provided under the radar
But whatever the case she once snapped and said

"You think just because youve come here a few times youre special?"

I just sat there in disbelief
Ive been seeing her weekly sometimes more
For close to a year
Inc long bookings
Inc small gifts, favours ..
Mostly easy sessions for her
Treating her more like seeking arrangment than escort
And thats still “a few times” in her mind?

Maybe im wrong but
I suspect theres a mentality some escorts have
No matter how long theyve known you
every session exists in isolation
Whether youre a first timer or a years deep regular
youre just another booking on the clock

[Cheltclient]

I have one girl atm I have EAS for
I see her often when I can make some time while I work it out of my system (which hasnt been going great)
She caught me off guard one day
Not sure what triggered it but I think it was a time I asked for something that wasnt on her enjoys list
Nothing wild
But something she provided under the radar
But whatever the case she once snapped and said

"You think just because youve come here a few times youre special?"

I just sat there in disbelief
Ive been seeing her weekly sometimes more
For close to a year
Inc long bookings
Inc small gifts, favours ..
Mostly easy sessions for her
Treating her more like seeking arrangment than escort
And thats still “a few times” in her mind?

Maybe im wrong but
I suspect theres a mentality some escorts have
No matter how long theyve known you
every session exists in isolation
Whether youre a first timer or a years deep regular
youre just another booking on the clock

But that’s right. The escort isn’t looking for a relationship. They are selling sex. I do understand how the lines can get blurred but that’s our issue, not theirs. Your example seems a bit different to the OP. In his situation and having seen the woman over 25 years, she could have been more flexible. If you were asking for something she does not provide, she was probably rightfully insulted. Hence the rebuke.

[Thehatedone]

But that’s right. The escort isn’t looking for a relationship. They are selling sex. I do understand how the lines can get blurred but that’s our issue, not theirs. Your example seems a bit different to the OP. In his situation and having seen the woman over 25 years, she could have been more flexible. If you were asking for something she does not provide, she was probably rightfully insulted. Hence the rebuke.

In this case she led me on to believe she was open to one
Without going into specifics
And its quite a story in manipulation tactics
This girl led me on a alot
She can at best claim she wws just playing to my desires (if she was honest but shes not) but it was unethical
Because underlying it was purely a desire to get as much out of me as possible
She could hwve gently rejected me I would have still seen her i told her as much but
She saw i was awe struck by her and she fully leaned into it
With alot of sweet words and actions that go beyond usual escort client relationship
But were ultimately in hindsight shallow
Because she sensed im not a bummy guy the type she frequently deals wirh working where she does
I was eventually ready to ditch my SO and marry her
I told her how I felt
She asked me to ring her
I guess it was all exposed as a performance in the end
It only took slight testing of her boundary for the house of cards to collapse
All over something she was offering other regs
More intimate things
Huge slap the face
Not saying im some guy of big means but
I was ready to invest alot in her
Thankfully it was all exposed before she rinsed me
I shudder to think what this sweet soft spoken angel had planned for me
I still see her tho
And she still tries it with me in every meet but now I see what shes doing and tell her I m happily with someone
Sad thing is she still does not confess what she was doing and pretends it was genuine
But when her actions dont align with her words what am I to think?

[MLawro93]

In this case she led me on to believe she was open to one
Without going into specifics
And its quite a story in manipulation tactics
This girl led me on a alot
She can at best claim she wws just playing to my desires (if she was honest but shes not) but it was unethical
Because underlying it was purely a desire to get as much out of me as possible
She could hwve gently rejected me I would have still seen her i told her as much but
She saw i was awe struck by her and she fully leaned into it
With alot of sweet words and actions that go beyond usual escort client relationship
But were ultimately in hindsight shallow
Because she sensed im not a bummy guy the type she frequently deals wirh working where she does
I was eventually ready to ditch my SO and marry her
I told her how I felt
She asked me to ring her
I guess it was all exposed as a performance in the end
It only took slight testing of her boundary for the house of cards to collapse
All over something she was offering other regs
More intimate things
Huge slap the face
Not saying im some guy of big means but
I was ready to invest alot in her
Thankfully it was all exposed before she rinsed me
I shudder to think what this sweet soft spoken angel had planned for me
I still see her tho
And she still tries it with me in every meet but now I see what shes doing and tell her I m happily with someone
Sad thing is she still does not confess what she was doing and pretends it was genuine
But when her actions dont align with her words what am I to think?

Two sides to every story, and your POV just strikes me as someone who had a clear-cut case of EAS. If she told you to put a ring on it, why didn't you? Did you make the effort to see her, interact with her outside of this world? Was every interaction you ever had with her a paid one? I mean, there are some red flags in what you say

I don't think it's the story of manipulation you think it is, but it strikes me as a SP who could have been clearer. Ultimately, this is a business. And the usual dynamics don't really apply. Personally, I don't think you should ever see a SP that you have EAS for; you'll only end up causing a mess.

[Cheltclient]

Two sides to every story, and your POV just strikes me as someone who had a clear-cut case of EAS. If she told you to put a ring on it, why didn't you? Did you make the effort to see her, interact with her outside of this world? Was every interaction you ever had with her a paid one? I mean, there are some red flags in what you say

I don't think it's the story of manipulation you think it is, but it strikes me as a SP who could have been clearer. Ultimately, this is a business. And the usual dynamics don't really apply. Personally, I don't think you should ever see a SP that you have EAS for; you'll only end up causing a mess.

You can certainly get some escorts who play on emotions and are manipulative. But I hate to say it, the chap who posted this tale, almost sounds a little vulnerable. Maybe easy to take advantage of. Could be way off of course.

Mind you with all that baggage, he’s still seeing her. Crazy. Just goes to show how impactful this world can be on emotions, for both escorts and clients

[MLawro93]

You can certainly get some escorts who play on emotions and are manipulative. But I hate to say it, the chap who posted this tale, almost sounds a little vulnerable. Maybe easy to take advantage of. Could be way off of course.

Mind you with all that baggage, he’s still seeing her. Crazy. Just goes to show how impactful this world can be on emotions, for both escorts and clients

I mean, he clearly was pushing boundaries. Even says he was. It might be minor for him, but it could have been big for the SP, so she put him in his place. It happens. Perhaps she thought he was being like this to get extras that other clients don't, wouldn't be the first time a client has done this to a SP and then dropped them when they get what they want. Shit works both ways.

Yeah, shouldn't be seeing her. Not healthy at all.

[Thehatedone]

Ill admit this is one shaped by my own EAS
But that doesnt make it all fantasy

This girl was genuinely open to marry me
She messaged me affectionately while im at work
Told me I was the best man in her life Sent long romantic texts over WhatsApp
We spoke outside of meetings
I never saw her outside of her flat she offered dates but I refused out of paranoia so we held dates indoors that mirrored outside interaction
I used to see her for hours never one touched her sexually just chatted
She claimed to act like herself with me which I would say was true based on her feedback from others she wws different more genuine

But her actions didnt match what she claimed to feel for me
I have many examples but the one that got me is that
She also sees someone I know personally and did things with him that she refused to do with me
And when I asked for the same she acted as if I was out of line
That contradiction is what led down the path of me ultimately shedding the delusion

If she truly liked me as much as she claimed as a man not just a client
And not just playing to my fantasies as in hindsight became clear
She would go above and beyond for me too in service like she did for my friend (who she told him she finds him attractive)
But he and others got thing I didnt
How do I make sense of that?
Because the only other difference between me and him was that I am of somewhat better means and she knew it
So naturally the question arises: was the affection ever about me at all or just a strategy to pull infatuated guy like me deeper so I she could get more money out of me

Was agreeing to marry me genuine or was it about access to what she thinks I have. I think knowing all this that it would have been a set up that wouldve ultimately worked against me
she was definitely only interested in the legal potential for a clean exit with a payout

I agree this is a business and EAS always clouds judgment

But I dont think Im wrong in feeling misled She played the part of someone emotionally invested very well she was deliberately dishonest but even today wont admit to it

I still see her every week atleast once
We are professional now and just do business now and I leave we don't talk much about personal stuff just usual cordial conversation
I told h3r my feelings are gone wnd treat me like a normal guy and shes honored that so far but
I still stalk her aw profile to see if shes working or imagine what shes upto when shes not online when shes supposed to be
I anxiously look at her ukpunting page to see if theres any new reviews wnd
get a pit in my stomach when I see one
I get nauseous when I read what people are writing
If im brave enough to even open the review
Usually it requires quite a bit of vodka
I still think
OK maybe its all fake
But if I keep showing up
Being good to her
Still bring her gifts sometimes
Maybe i can prove myself

[Cappadonna]

Time to move on. Get treated like shit after 25 years?

Fuck that.

Let someone else get her money.

[Blackpool Rock]

You can certainly get some escorts who play on emotions and are manipulative. But I hate to say it, the chap who posted this tale, almost sounds a little vulnerable. Maybe easy to take advantage of. Could be way off of course.

Mind you with all that baggage, he’s still seeing her. Crazy. Just goes to show how impactful this world can be on emotions, for both escorts and clients

Yeah surely self preservation would make you not see her again if you thought you'd been manipulated like that 
Clearly a large amount of EAS going on but still seeing her means he's keeping himself addicted to her and i'm thinking she's now got him like a puppet on a string

We really need a link to the girl as there may be other reports on here about her, also what's these extras that she's apparently giving out to other guys UTC 

[MLawro93]

Ill admit this is one shaped by my own EAS
But that doesnt make it all fantasy

This girl was genuinely open to marry me
She messaged me affectionately while im at work
Told me I was the best man in her life Sent long romantic texts over WhatsApp
We spoke outside of meetings
I never saw her outside of her flat she offered dates but I refused out of paranoia so we held dates indoors that mirrored outside interaction
I used to see her for hours never one touched her sexually just chatted
She claimed to act like herself with me which I would say was true based on her feedback from others she wws different more genuine

But her actions didnt match what she claimed to feel for me
I have many examples but the one that got me is that
She also sees someone I know personally and did things with him that she refused to do with me
And when I asked for the same she acted as if I was out of line
That contradiction is what led down the path of me ultimately shedding the delusion

If she truly liked me as much as she claimed as a man not just a client
And not just playing to my fantasies as in hindsight became clear
She would go above and beyond for me too in service like she did for my friend (who she told him she finds him attractive)
But he and others got thing I didnt
How do I make sense of that?
Because the only other difference between me and him was that I am of somewhat better means and she knew it
So naturally the question arises: was the affection ever about me at all or just a strategy to pull infatuated guy like me deeper so I she could get more money out of me

Was agreeing to marry me genuine or was it about access to what she thinks I have. I think knowing all this that it would have been a set up that wouldve ultimately worked against me
she was definitely only interested in the legal potential for a clean exit with a payout

I agree this is a business and EAS always clouds judgment

But I dont think Im wrong in feeling misled She played the part of someone emotionally invested very well she was deliberately dishonest but even today wont admit to it

I still see her every week atleast once
We are professional now and just do business now and I leave we don't talk much about personal stuff just usual cordial conversation
I told h3r my feelings are gone wnd treat me like a normal guy and shes honored that so far but
I still stalk her aw profile to see if shes working or imagine what shes upto when shes not online when shes supposed to be
I anxiously look at her ukpunting page to see if theres any new reviews wnd
get a pit in my stomach when I see one
I get nauseous when I read what people are writing
If im brave enough to even open the review
Usually it requires quite a bit of vodka
I still think
OK maybe its all fake
But if I keep showing up
Being good to her
Still bring her gifts sometimes
Maybe i can prove myself

Clearly not over this person mate. Need to stop deluding yourself and just bite the bullet and stop seeing her.

[Jameson20]

This perfectly highlights the potential for things going to shit with regs. It won't always happen, obviously, but the potential for it is there, and very much easier the more embroiled you become. As others have pointed out, she's an SP charging money for sex, nothing more. She doesn't care about you beyond your wallet and that won't change if you punted her for another 25 years. My advice is to sack her off and move on. There's plenty more pussy in the sea.

[Blackpool Rock]

Clearly not over this person mate. Need to stop deluding yourself and just bite the bullet and stop seeing her.

Yeah i'm starting to pick up some obsessive and borderline unhealthy thoughts and actions, he even says he stalks her AW account and reviews on here 

[Cheltclient]

Yeah i'm starting to pick up some obsessive and borderline unhealthy thoughts and actions, he even says he stalks her AW account and reviews on here 

I completely agree. I kind of applaud his honesty but he also posted on another thread about a dysfunctional partner who was so paranoid he had to let her her smell his cock when he returned home. But on that thread he is devoted to her but on this thread he is talking about marriage with an SP he is addicted to. What a mess. And doesn’t seem to all tie together.

But I do agree - some worries here  - maybe he has just worded this all badly - but there are some unhealthy red flags here. Stalking her profile. Anxiety caused by the thought of anyone else seeing her. Thinking he has something special when his mate is also banging her (and I can only assume he’s getting bare back). Blimey, I didn’t like reading his last post. Hopefully it’s just a hefty amount of EAS but my advice to the chap, stop seeing this SP. The behaviour here is not ok

 

[alabama1]

The most baffling thing i find is the length (or lack of), Thehatedone's sentences, and no full stops. Visually it looks like how a piece of poetry would be set out. Seems like he's taken over the thread too !

[stevesucks69]

Post her profile maybe worth a look and there maybe information on there relating to cancellation

[Iamforreal]

Ill admit this is one shaped by my own EAS
But that doesnt make it all fantasy

This girl was genuinely open to marry me
She messaged me affectionately while im at work
Told me I was the best man in her life Sent long romantic texts over WhatsApp
We spoke outside of meetings
I never saw her outside of her flat she offered dates but I refused out of paranoia so we held dates indoors that mirrored outside interaction
I used to see her for hours never one touched her sexually just chatted
She claimed to act like herself with me which I would say was true based on her feedback from others she wws different more genuine

But her actions didnt match what she claimed to feel for me
I have many examples but the one that got me is that
She also sees someone I know personally and did things with him that she refused to do with me
And when I asked for the same she acted as if I was out of line
That contradiction is what led down the path of me ultimately shedding the delusion

If she truly liked me as much as she claimed as a man not just a client
And not just playing to my fantasies as in hindsight became clear
She would go above and beyond for me too in service like she did for my friend (who she told him she finds him attractive)
But he and others got thing I didnt
How do I make sense of that?
Because the only other difference between me and him was that I am of somewhat better means and she knew it
So naturally the question arises: was the affection ever about me at all or just a strategy to pull infatuated guy like me deeper so I she could get more money out of me

Was agreeing to marry me genuine or was it about access to what she thinks I have. I think knowing all this that it would have been a set up that wouldve ultimately worked against me
she was definitely only interested in the legal potential for a clean exit with a payout

I agree this is a business and EAS always clouds judgment

But I dont think Im wrong in feeling misled She played the part of someone emotionally invested very well she was deliberately dishonest but even today wont admit to it

I still see her every week atleast once
We are professional now and just do business now and I leave we don't talk much about personal stuff just usual cordial conversation
I told h3r my feelings are gone wnd treat me like a normal guy and shes honored that so far but
I still stalk her aw profile to see if shes working or imagine what shes upto when shes not online when shes supposed to be
I anxiously look at her ukpunting page to see if theres any new reviews wnd
get a pit in my stomach when I see one
I get nauseous when I read what people are writing
If im brave enough to even open the review
Usually it requires quite a bit of vodka
I still think
OK maybe its all fake
But if I keep showing up
Being good to her
Still bring her gifts sometimes
Maybe i can prove myself

What did I just read? 
If all this is true, you are in serious trouble mentally and I'm afraid is a looong way back for you, you should go and see other girls or just stop seeing this one for your own sake!! 

[Cheltclient]

What did I just read? 
If all this is true, you are in serious trouble mentally and I'm afraid is a looong way back for you, you should go and see other girls or just stop seeing this one for your own sake!! 

Yeah is a worrying read, isn’t it. I suspect English isn’t his first language (maybe) - but worrying behaviour in that story.  No idea what is going on in this chaps life but I agree - he should seek some help.

[daviemac]

Ill admit this is one shaped by my own EAS
But that doesnt make it all fantasy

TLDR