Saw Anna a couple of months back
Emailed her a few days before. Told her I enjoyed GFE - lots of French kissing OWO and RO etc - would she consider CIM?
Answer: "I love GFE and I love to be sensual and seductive and I also enjoy oral (OWO) both ways. I don't do CIM but you can cum on my body if you like. I have a luxury flat in Clifton
So, I TOFTT.
Fuck me its hard to park round where she lives, how people round there cope I have no idea. Took me ages to find a space and meant I was 10 mins late for the meet.
Her flat is in a really grand square of late Georgian early Victorian houses with stucco pillars. The square was designed by the famous neo-classical architect, Charles Underwood who was known to quote "There be mighty fine buildings here, with perfect quarters for a skanky prossie to work from in an old servants block, M'lud"
Or something like that.
Anyway, got to the flat - its round the back of one of the buildings and in a new 60's extension. The flat has not seen an improvement since DIY SOS was on the screens for sure. A real dump. Lino floors, bathroom with avocado suite with stained bog, literally black grout around the tiles, a electric shower that is either boiling hot or freezing cold.
Anna is tall, brunette and a bit jumpy. Not a bad package but not stunning. Dodgy teeth, nicish tits.
I have a quick shower, freeze my nads, then scald them dry myself on a 15 year old towel that can stand upright on its own. Punt is not looking good at this stage.
Into the bedroom. This is where Anna has really made an effort. The bed has a sheet and an old duvet cover over it. theres a burnt out candle by the bed with an antique radio from 1983 stuck on Heart FM blaring our pop music - "Can you turn it down?" "Sorry the volume button doesn't work".
Thankfully, Anna has thought of the punter who needs to take his clothes off by providing a floor to put them on. Obviously keen to make the human touch, she thoughtfully hasn't hoovered the floor for a few years, to give that lived in smell for your clothes afterwards.
Onto the punt. GFE for Anna means the girlfriend who has "had enough of your farting under the duvet and going down the pub and not inviting her but is willing to shag you this last time as she needs you to pay half the rent this month" type of GF us punters all know and love.
Kissing was lips only, no tongue action. Oral was covered (OWO not even offered despite emails) and then onto the bed, I thought my trick of RO would get her in the mood so I set off south. Fuck me, she obviously didn't like the shower either, so I made an excuse and came back up for a breath of musty air in the room.
She then went down on me and we shagged quickly and I popped as soon as I could. She got up and disappeared. I sat there for a bit savouring how lucky the punter is to be treated to such lavish surroundings
Headed back to the bathroom and washed me scroats in the sink and bade her farewell. All done is 20 minutes. No offer of longer, when I got back to the room, she was fully dressed and asked "What are you doing for the rest of the day?" I looked at my watch an said, "I might have an early lunch as I seem to have got some time back". My razor sharp wit was lost on her blank expression.
Gents, how the fuck has this average two penny tart got 100+ve reviews???
Its an average vanilla punt at the best. Ok, the flat is a shithole, but all she has to do is nip to IKEA (theres on on the fucking motorway on the way out of Bristol) and buy:
A) A Chair
B) Some tea light candles
C) Some towels
D) Some new bedding
E) A radio that works
Would probably set her back £150 tops and then she could buy a hoover and run that over the place. Put a few quid into the place, make an effort and get a return punter for months. As it is, its a shithole to punt in, she has made no effort, at all and provides a parlour-esque punt. I have my own suspicions on how she has got to get this flat and her background, but I'll keep them to myself.
She is pleasant enough to talk to but has absolutely no idea of how to get return business. Either that or blokes in Bristol are willing to put up with this type of shite service. If thats the case, then you boys need to treat yourself to some of Londons finest EE girls.
As it is, I would rather get a wank off of Anne Widdecombe