The MIA of Chancery Lane

[iq129]

The MIA – Total failure of a punt

External Link/Members Only

Cost: £130 for 45 mins

Gone are the days when I was much younger and got sexually excited very easily. Yes, when I was a teenager I would get a solid erection at the mere sight of a woman, but I am 60 now and I need proper foreplay and DFK to get going.

According to UKP reviews and also from my past experience, Polish ladies seem to be the best kissers. One of these ladies is supposed to be Mia, who I was hoping would help a 60+ old man to get and maintain a hard-on with her infamous DFK. I therefore booked a 45-minute session with Mia very recently.

The punt:

There is a saying called “Love at first sight”. However, in this case it was “Disappointment at first sight”. Not disappointment from me, but from Mia, as I was not the type of person that Mia was expecting.

It took me some 5-10 minutes of pre-punt introductory chatting and joking, and another 10 minutes showering and grooming to get Mia to accept me without being so hesitant and reluctant.

Sadly, this punt was almost a non-starter. There was very little foreplay, almost zero. Mia grabbed my penis and stroked it to bring it to attention, but without kissing it was totally dead.

I tried to get Mia to kiss which she did hesitantly, but these were light dry kisses without any tongue. I was very anxious to get an erection, but this was not happening. My desperation to get an erection was causing me more stress and anxiety, and that triggered a horrible cycle of non-erection, anxiety, non-erection, more anxiety and so on.

I then politely asked Mia if she could provide somewhat deeper kissing with at least some tongue to which she said "I don't provide that type of service".

I then decided to end my suffering and to provide Mia with her freedom as soon as possible. I therefore masturbated and was assisted by Mia. I eventually came and that was the end of Mia’s worst time of her life.

Conclusion: This punt was to be the first one where I have had to hand relieve myself. I spent £130 for 45 minutes of embarrassment, rejection and self-esteem destruction in what was a total failure of a punt.

This punt is perhaps the final nail in the coffin for my punting. I doubt if I will punt anymore, and I might have to spend the rest of my life in a sexless marriage and with no other alternatives.

[Bartolomeo]

Sorry you had a terrible time.

You always seem to put yourself down really badly. Not saying this in a mean way, but have you tried going to therapy? It might be able to help.

Also, you've had some good punts with women who've given you a nice time and with good kissing that you want, so maybe keep going to them until you maybe build up your confidence again?

[iq129]

Sorry you had a terrible time.

You always seem to put yourself down really badly. Not saying this in a mean way, but have you tried going to therapy? It might be able to help.

Also, you've had some good punts with women who've given you a nice time and with good kissing that you want, so maybe keep going to them until you maybe build up your confidence again?

Dear Sir,

I appreciate your advice.

Yes, I have had good punts but most of those ladies are either gone or travel around or don’t work frequently. Those are just few ladies. Most of the others are not interested in serving a 60 year old man with the advertised services.

Only one lady offers me proper DFK and I see her every six weeks or two months because she only tours closer to London during that time. In between there are no other ladies that provide a reasonable service.

I am taking antidepressants but they don’t help at times such as post-punting disappointments.

I wish I could give up punting. The ideal situation would be if I have no desire to seek women at all. No sex drive at all. That might require hormonal therapy. I will talk to my doctor about this.

Thanks and regards.

iq129

[MLawro93]

What does DFK mean for you? Seeing as its the thing you want the most, as kissing really does vary person to person.

[patelprat]

You will give up punting and stop seeing your favourites like Honey, Jessica and Lisa Polish? Naaaah!

[Global_Punter]

I'm sorry to hear about your bad experience. I believe it's generally easier for men to find love at any age and with different partners. The most important thing is to take care of yourself and eat well to maintain a good physique.

Also, pay attention to your hygiene. I mention these things because I've noticed many older men in your age bracket enjoying themselves with younger women.

You might also consider travelling; places like FKK in Germany and Thailand come highly recommended.

Additionally, try to build a rapport with a service provider so that you can become a regular. This way, you'll have a consistently good experience.

[Petetong888]

sorry to hear this mate

Maybe try a chinese massage place, as I am more of kissing man, than sex, and tend to find alot of them offer DFK.

They are not all lookers, but as i struggle to cun without kissing, i rather take an average looker who snogs your face off.

[iq129]

You will give up punting and stop seeing your favourites like Honey, Jessica and Lisa Polish? Naaaah!

Jessica is not one of my favourites, and she is hardly available in London. Honey, I just saw for the sixth time and she was very disappointing. She has totally changed over the last 6-10 months. Lisa only comes in my vicinity every six weeks or two months and she may retire soon. That leaves no one else.

[iq129]

What does DFK mean for you? Seeing as its the thing you want the most, as kissing really does vary person to person.

DFK is the same for me as it is for others. It is simply passionate kissing with tongues included from time to time. It is definitely not slight pecks and most definitely not turning one’s head away.

[iq129]

I'm sorry to hear about your bad experience. I believe it's generally easier for men to find love at any age and with different partners. The most important thing is to take care of yourself and eat well to maintain a good physique.

Also, pay attention to your hygiene. I mention these things because I've noticed many older men in your age bracket enjoying themselves with younger women.

You might also consider travelling; places like FKK in Germany and Thailand come highly recommended.

Additionally, try to build a rapport with a service provider so that you can become a regular. This way, you'll have a consistently good experience.

I appreciate your advice.

The hygiene issue is sometimes with SPs and never with me. I take a bath before leaving for the punt and I arrive nicely groomed with a clean shave, trimmed pubes, manicured fingernails and fresh breath. I also shower at the lady’s place and I use antibacterial gels all day long.

There is one lady, Lisa.Polish who I regularly see, so that answers your rapport suggestion. I can’t see her all the time because she is in my area every 6-10 weeks. I don’t know what this lady sees in me but she may retire soon.

Travelling is no guarantee and is impractical as I have work commitments.

[iq129]

sorry to hear this mate

Maybe try a chinese massage place, as I am more of kissing man, than sex, and tend to find alot of them offer DFK.

They are not all lookers, but as i struggle to cun without kissing, i rather take an average looker who snogs your face off.

This sounds like a perfect suggestion. I’d rather just have DFK and a hand job than mechanical sex with zero kissing. Like you I would take an average or even an ugly lady who snogs my face off instead of a supermodel who shys away from kissing.

[patelprat]

Jessica is not one of my favourites, and she is hardly available in London. Honey, I just saw for the sixth time and she was very disappointing. She has totally changed over the last 6-10 months. Lisa only comes in my vicinity every six weeks or two months and she may retire soon. That leaves no one else.

What happened with Honey? I actually put her on my HL from your earlier comments.

[iq129]

What happened with Honey? I actually put her on my HL from your earlier comments.

I saw Honey five times in quick succession until April last year, but then had a long gap and saw her in February this year.

This time Honey was a totally different girl. The kissing was shallow, and she said no to even gentle fingering. She was very mechanical and seemed totally uninterested. Maybe she had an off day or is now jaded. Regardless, I won’t see her again.

[Global_Punter]

There's Kelly at Moorgate (massage place) — you'll find her review on the site. I don't want to go into too much detail, as it may derail the thread. She gives a very passionate DFK and OWO/OW. FS is not on the list, as far as I'm aware. Maybe this session will make you smile and warm you up again for the hobby.

[scutty brown]

Cost: £130 for 45 mins
....................................

It took me some 5-10 minutes of pre-punt introductory chatting and joking, and another 10 minutes showering and grooming to get Mia to accept me without being so hesitant and reluctant.

I suspect there's a large part of your problem there.
45 minute punt and you spent half of it messing around with non-productive small talk and grooming.
The girl probably thought you were a time waster and were going to overrun. She'd given up on you and wanted you out.
Forget the intro chatting and joking, just get your gear off and get into it. You said you were already bathed so the only grooming you might need is to rinse your cock and ass off with soap and gargle with mouthwash. Just a few minutes, not twenty

Another point is I get the impression you've got a hang up over you not reaching her expectations. That's just a route to madness. The only expectation she has of you is that you'll pay her, and you're not a demanding or violent idiot. She not there to be impressed - she doesn't give a shit about that. You're there to get your end away. Not to make her scream with pleasure

[iq129]

I suspect there's a large part of your problem there.
45 minute punt and you spent half of it messing around with non-productive small talk and grooming.
The girl probably thought you were a time waster and were going to overrun. She'd given up on you and wanted you out.
Forget the intro chatting and joking, just get your gear off and get into it. You said you were already bathed so the only grooming you might need is to rinse your cock and ass off with soap and gargle with mouthwash. Just a few minutes, not twenty

Another point is I get the impression you've got a hang up over you not reaching her expectations. That's just a route to madness. The only expectation she has of you is that you'll pay her, and you're not a demanding or violent idiot. She not there to be impressed - she doesn't give a shit about that. You're there to get your end away. Not to make her scream with pleasure

You may have some excellent advice which I have highlighted in bold font. I am over chatty, over friendly and too funny, as if I am trying to make a woman fall in love with me. I ought to change this behaviour without overdoing it. This is if I do have the urge to punt again, although getting hormonal treatment to stop my attraction to females is the best course of action.

Also, I think that whilst trying to impress ladies, I am spending too much time cleaning myself to the extent that my skin is peeling off due to constant washing and using antibacterial soap.

[patelprat]

Iq, sorry again about the lack of kissing, but the focus of the review seems more on you than Mia.

How did you rate her looks? Body type? Was she as expected? Attractive? She's also on my list to see.

[iq129]

Iq, sorry again about the lack of kissing, but the focus of the review seems more on you than Mia.

How did you rate her looks? Body type? Was she as expected? Attractive? She's also on my list to see.

Her stated age seems correct. Looks were OK. Not extremely attractive but reasonable. Body type average. Nice hair. Hygienic. Nice smelling. With your track record and dashing looks, I am sure she will be all over you.

[jseop109]

Some of this repeats comments already made:

First, don't beat yourself up over it. Sometimes these things just happen. The chemistry isn't right or you get at cross purposes in a way that kills the mood. I have myself been in the situation where I've had to finish myself off by hand. Not ideal but you win some you lose some, as they say.

And I notice that on her AW profile MIA doesn't list DFK as one of her services. Your request, and her refusal, may have made the awkwardness worse than it already was. Maybe if that's important to you you need to check SP's profiles more carefully? For me personally, kissing is important but it doesn't have to be DFK.

A couple of suggestions already made above:

How about exploring massage,  with HE or not. By not having to focus on your erection or lack of it, it may help to relax you and make you more comfortable in your own skin. And as already mentioned, you don't have to, and can't, impress an SP, either positively or negatively. She seen it all before many times!

Also, if you can find a sympathetic SP (from AW profiles or reviews here), preferably one with good english, you need feel no embarrassment at describing your issues and difficulties. Again, she's seen it all before and she's there to provide a service.

Good luck!

[patelprat]

Her reviews here suggest many get DFK.

[iq129]

Her reviews here suggest many get DFK.

That's why I went to see her.

[Global_Punter]

I suspect there's a large part of your problem there.
45 minute punt and you spent half of it messing around with non-productive small talk and grooming.
The girl probably thought you were a time waster and were going to overrun. She'd given up on you and wanted you out.
Forget the intro chatting and joking, just get your gear off and get into it. You said you were already bathed so the only grooming you might need is to rinse your cock and ass off with soap and gargle with mouthwash. Just a few minutes, not twenty

Another point is I get the impression you've got a hang up over you not reaching her expectations. That's just a route to madness. The only expectation she has of you is that you'll pay her, and you're not a demanding or violent idiot. She not there to be impressed - she doesn't give a shit about that. You're there to get your end away. Not to make her scream with pleasure

This is good advice. Firstly, remember that the relationship is transactional. You're not there to please a service provider; as long as you are well-groomed and they haven't been treated violently, you don't need to go overboard. For instance, if you have already showered, a quick refresh should suffice. Additionally, good hygiene is a continuous journey; a 10-minute shower routine won't make a significant difference.

Self-worth must come from within. External validation is irrelevant. 

GP

[trickyd2]

Seeems a shame that The MIA is getting a poor review due to a lack of contact with one punter.
Just to balance, here is my recent review: https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=415909.0
I have seeen her several times and this review reflects each of our meetings.

[LipLover]

Seeems a shame that The MIA is getting a poor review due to a lack of contact with one punter.
Just to balance, here is my recent review: https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=415909.0
I have seeen her several times and this review reflects each of our meetings.

It's his experience and his review. I don't think it's necessary to signpost your review as we can check out the positives for ourselves should we wish to.

ps maybe check out the 'e' on your keyboard? 

[LLPunting]

Seeems a shame that The MIA is getting a poor review due to a lack of contact with one punter.
Just to balance, here is my recent review: https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=415909.0
I have seeen her several times and this review reflects each of our meetings.

So you're white knighting?

[juzz]

...
This is if I do have the urge to punt again, although getting hormonal treatment to stop my attraction to females is the best course of action.
...

That doesn't sound a sensible course of action to me. Hormonal therapy to stop a normal desire? I would be doubting any medic who would offer that.

Such treatments should surley only be considered to those with unhealthy/dangerous desires.  Unless you fall in this group (and you don't sound like you do), I'd suggest some therapy to deal with the issues. Being attracted to females doesn't sound like an issue unless it's out of control.

[trickyd2]

So you're white knighting?

That is not my intention. Based on my recent visit to Mia, she has no need of a White Night as she already has as much business as she wishes to handle.
I was merely trying to provide some balance to people reading this forum in search of guidance as to who might suit them, which I believe is one of the goals of this forum. It is not unusual for one person to comment, in effect, well she wasn't like that with me, which provides a different view. It appears that the OP has his own expectations and perhaps different standards. I note that there is an exchange between him and Deluxe Tanya where again his experience of her service, in particular kissing, appears to differ from the vast majority of her clients.
If providing balance or an alternative viewpoint is not desired, then please feel free to delete my post.

[Ivor Hunch]

tbh, OP's reviews generally seem to be more about him than the SP.

He seems to suffer from an extreme lack of self-esteem, which deeply colours the reviews.

[scutty brown]

That is not my intention. Based on my recent visit to Mia, she has no need of a White Night as she already has as much business as she wishes to handle.
I was merely trying to provide some balance to people reading this forum in search of guidance as to who might suit them, which I believe is one of the goals of this forum. It is not unusual for one person to comment, in effect, well she wasn't like that with me, which provides a different view. It appears that the OP has his own expectations and perhaps different standards. I note that there is an exchange between him and Deluxe Tanya where again his experience of her service, in particular kissing, appears to differ from the vast majority of her clients.
If providing balance or an alternative viewpoint is not desired, then please feel free to delete my post.

May not be your intention, but it could easily be regarded as such.
It would be difficult to argue against anyone who clamed you were in her pocket. Be careful

[Garyhart]

Seeems a shame that The MIA is getting a poor review due to a lack of contact with one punter.
Just to balance, here is my recent review: https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=415909.0
I have seeen her several times and this review reflects each of our meetings.

What’s this to do with the post? There’s nothing to ‘balance’ as the OP wrote a thorough review based on his experience with her, which was drastically different to yours and we have a right to accept that her service can fluctuate. Just because she was good with you it doesn’t mean it invalidates the OP’s review of her whatsoever. I’ve reviewed SPs positively who’ve given others a bad service weeks / months later and I don’t try and question whether their negative review was genuine or not. She could’ve been in a different mood or have some deep rooted bias based on factors out of the posters control.

Whether he’s seen her once, or you’ve seen her 100 times, the review above is needed and your experience with her is yours. The fact that she could omit many things from her usual services is quite alarming and she can’t complain about a dusty phone in the near future

[iq129]

Regarding the comments by jseop109, Global_Punter, Garyhart, Scotty brown and others, I wish to thank you for your impartial advice and some very helpful suggestions.

[iq129]

tbh, OP's reviews generally seem to be more about him than the SP.

He seems to suffer from an extreme lack of self-esteem, which deeply colours the reviews.

Having re-read this review, I can now see that the review is more about me than the SP. The SP has many reviews that describe her physically and in terms of her service and attitude, so I doubt if my review was that crucial in helping others decide whether to visit the SP or not.

Anyway, in future, if and when I decide to punt again, then I will ensure that my future reviews will focus more on the SP.

Regarding my self-esteem, yes, that is a major problem. I was a very confident and self-respecting child, but after I turned sixteen, I was severely bullied for around six or seven years. I have never recovered from that trauma, and as the years have gone by my self-esteem has kept going downhill. However, my reviews are authentic and are an accurate account of my experience with the SP, from my perspective. Lack of self-esteem has no bearing on the SP to provide her usual service which other punters avail of.

Many of my reviews are positive anyway, so it is not all gloom and doom in each and every punt. Yes, Lisa.Polish, whom I have seen countless times but who may retire soon, and one or two other ladies (now sadly gone) have offered me a good service which I would say is on par with what other punters receive from those ladies but that's about it. The service levels (particularly FK and DFK) provided by these ladies suggests that my zero self-esteem is irrelevant to my punting encounters.

[iq129]

That doesn't sound a sensible course of action to me. Hormonal therapy to stop a normal desire? I would be doubting any medic who would offer that.

Such treatments should surley only be considered to those with unhealthy/dangerous desires.  Unless you fall in this group (and you don't sound like you do), I'd suggest some therapy to deal with the issues. Being attracted to females doesn't sound like an issue unless it's out of control.

Points taken, understood and agreed. Yes, it would be absurd to ask any medical expert to inject me with oestrogen to counteract my testosterone, as I have no valid medical reason for this. Yes, despite hitting 60, I am still very much attracted to women so maybe I need to seek a psychiatrist / psychotherapist for how to deal with my urges. I am on anti-depressants for many years now, and I think it might be time for some other medication or therapy.

[Global_Punter]

Regarding the comments by jseop109, Global_Punter, Garyhart, Scotty brown and others, I wish to thank you for your impartial advice and some very helpful suggestions.

Keep your head up! As I mentioned before, it's important to love yourself. I shouldn't be saying this in a public forum, but here are some basics to consider: get your dental work done, eat well, exercise, groom yourself, and treat yourself from time to time.

Never let anyone dictate your worth. I know you mentioned being busy, but do try to travel abroad. As someone who travels for work, I've seen many men over 60 being treated like rock stars by younger women.

Your review is honest, and I don't think you lack self-esteem. If a service provider doesn't meet your expectations, don't hesitate to remove them from your list and move on. Eventually, you'll find someone who fits your criteria.

Enjoy the hobby! 

[puntingking]

Seeems a shame that The MIA is getting a poor review due to a lack of contact with one punter.
Just to balance, here is my recent review: https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=415909.0
I have seeen her several times and this review reflects each of our meetings.

Maybe I should post in your "positive" review, a link of this negative review to balance things out too 

[puntingking]

The MIA – Total failure of a punt

External Link/Members Only



This punt is perhaps the final nail in the coffin for my punting. I doubt if I will punt anymore, and I might have to spend the rest of my life in a sexless marriage and with no other alternatives.

Don't let one escort put you off punting entiety. Maybe take a break. Somethimes a 4-6 months break may do you a world of good and you can have a new zest for the punting scene when you return. But I would suggest not to give up.

There are plenty of fishes in the sea, or there are plenty of escorts in the sea to be precise.

We are not there to please the wg, the wgs are here to please us.

You don't go into a supermarket to buy a phone to give it to the supermarket to have

all the best
 

[WelshClipper]

The following comment isn’t entirely relevant.

However this is the reason I try to avoid getting all het up about a good SP with whom I have a crap time.

Or indeed a great time with a crap SP, which has happened believe it or not.

For me punting remains an overall experience.

I am sure wonderful MIA has the ability of being as crap as any other SP.

Just my two cents, gunna creep back into my hole now. 

[Petetong888]

Matey, go and see Kelly at Natural Elements in moorgate.
Full on DFK, and i think she loves it as well.  Best kisser, ive seen in a chinese massage shop
BJ is pretty good as well.

[iq129]

Don't let one escort put you off punting entiety. Maybe take a break. Somethimes a 4-6 months break may do you a world of good and you can have a new zest for the punting scene when you return. But I would suggest not to give up.

There are plenty of fishes in the sea, or there are plenty of escorts in the sea to be precise.

We are not there to please the wg, the wgs are here to please us.

You don't go into a supermarket to buy a phone to give it to the supermarket to have

all the best
 

I appreciate your kind comments and your time taken for these comments. I have nothing against WGs or punters or anyone. Love to all.

[iq129]

Matey, go and see Kelly at Natural Elements in moorgate.
Full on DFK, and i think she loves it as well.  Best kisser, ive seen in a chinese massage shop
BJ is pretty good as well.

Thank you for the reminder.

[boardyhell]

hi
I am not  the best looking and advice to you is to stop complaining about not getting dfk who could be your granddaughter
I have heard that you are not ugly  from an escort I have seen
  I wouldn't want to kiss me
get over it

[iq129]

hi
I am not  the best looking and advice to you is to stop complaining about not getting dfk who could be your granddaughter
I have heard that you are not ugly  from an escort I have seen
  I wouldn't want to kiss me
get over it

Fair enough but I am not that old to qualify as a grandfather of an aged 18+ escort.

[Global_Punter]

hi
I am not  the best looking, and advice to you is to stop complaining about not getting dfk who could be your granddaughter
I have heard that you are not ugly  from an escort I have seen
  I wouldn't want to kiss me
get over it

That's an unreasonable comment. Who do you think most escorts prefer to see, and who gave you the authority to set criteria for DFK?

[scutty brown]

hi
I am not  the best looking and advice to you is to stop complaining about not getting dfk who could be your granddaughter
I have heard that you are not ugly  from an escort I have seen
  I wouldn't want to kiss me
get over it

So you discuss other punters from here with the escorts you meet?
Not exactly ethical by you or them. Perhaps you should tell us who they are so we can blacklist them?