External Link/Members OnlyGuys,
First post here. Tintin's recent review spurred me on to create an account so I can share my experience with this girl, which was one of the most bizarre encounters of my short punting career.
Where & when: I saw her mid last year in August, when she was based in a place near Old Street. More of that later. I now see she's moved to Paddington.
Price: At the time I think it was £150/hour + various extras (OWO +20, CIM +30, A +50), but if you keep track of her profile she constantly changes her hourly rate and adds/deletes extras or decides they are inclusive
Services provided: OWO, sex (covered)
Not delivered: Anal
Summary: Fit as fuck but madder than a box of frogs
Long read (apologies)
Meet: Was having difficulty finding her house/flat number. Texted her and it turned out it was more of a retail unit in a gated courtyard/alley off the main street. Got to gate which was locked with a keypad. Texted for code. Got text back: "wait" 5 mins later text came through with code. Punched in and I entered the courtyard. Like I said, more like light industrial or retail units rather than residential. Found door number which was ajar so I went in. The ground floor was like a break room for a grotty MOT garage, with a threadbare sofa and mucky sink. No sign of Nika, so tentatively went in and up the steel stairs to a kind of mezzanine to find Nika getting ready. When she saw me she kind of yelped like I totally surprised her and motioned for me to go back down. Sat on the grotty sofa for 10 minutes before Nika came down to meet me, visibly shocked I had surprised her earlier, even though she clearly knew i was outside and on my way in. We had an exchange through Google translate (she spoke virtually no English) to this effect, and was eventually beckoned upstairs. The "bedroom" was barely big enough to fit the double bed.
I will say though, she is very attractive. Young, slim with piercing blue eyes and a fantastic butt. Handed over the cash which included extra for OWO and A, then awkwardly manouvered around the bed to the equally grotty bathroom on the other side. Once in she makes a fuss that there's no shower gel. No problem I say but she insists on going out to get some. I just went ahead and had a shower using whatever was left and some shampoo. Dried off and I'm waiting for her on the bed, Eventually I become aware someone is shouting up at the window. It's her. Hardly discreet. She's gone out without her keys, so I go downstairs and let her back in. I'm beginning to suspect she's not all there.
Back upstairs it's a hot day so she starts fiddling with a desk fan, but breaks it. She then gestures for me to help her, so we're both fiddling with this fucking fan, trying to screw the base back on, but we can't so she tries to angle it on the floor (fantastic view of her arse whilst she was doing this). Anyway, we must be at least halfway through the hour now and eventually we're on the bed and she initiates a kiss, but she keeps getting distracted by the fucking fan. Can't leave it alone. I'm wondering what the fck is going on. Anyway, finally, a bit of OWO and it's pretty good but not as deep or mindblowing as her blurb promises. She then suggests we move on to sex. But, guess what, she's run out of condoms! So she puts on a coat and starts lacing up these massive boots (reminded me of that joke about a caterpillar) to go out again. Another 10 min wait, but at least she remembered her keys this time. I should have cut and run several red flags before this but once back she asks about anal. However, you'll never guess: she doesn't have the right lube! So back out she goes for the third shopping trip to Whores-R-Us in an hour punt! WTF! At this point I was more amused than annoyed.
Anyway when she's back she lubes up her rear end with about half the bottle and hands me a condom. Everything is so covered in lube I can hardly get a grip to get the damn thing out the packet. Eventually I'm there pushing on her back door but she then decides she doesn't want to do it. "Next time" she says. Yeah, right! So we go for some vaginal doggie, where she gets quite into it and asks me to pull her hair. Then into spoons, where she briefly engages, bends her head for some LFK before zoning out again. We are way over the hour now but time has kind of lost any temporal meaning by this point. She's distracted, I'm distracted and can't get over the line so try some more OWO and I finally pull myself off whilst she's doing a sexy dance. By that point I just wanted to finish and get out of there. She jokes another shower is £10 extra which genuinely made me laugh given the surreal experience, whilst at least she hands back the £50 notes for the non-anal performance.
So, yeah she's fit but either a piss taker or too scatty to organise herself as an escort. And I'm a mug.
Return? Nah. Im rating it a generous neutral. With this one, YMMV likely to be a huge understatement
