External Link/Members OnlyThis was a legit massage with no extras offered/requested. If this is not your thing, please stop reading.
Location: Located at 18 Northfield Avenue, just south of the Forester Pub in Northfields, South Ealing. Room was large with a heated massage table, dim lighting (courtesy of a towel tossed over the shade of the floorlamp) and soft music playing. No idea about a shower, although I could have used one afterwards.
Comms: Called 15 minutes before opening time but didn't leave a message. The receptionist "conveniently" called back about 30 minutes later and I booked then. Call back could potentially be a problem.
Fee: £60 for 1-hour Swedish massage (Deep tissue is an extra £10 for the hour); no extras discussed
Provider: Maya is tall and slim with long black hair and perhaps what you'd call a handsome face. She has a strong jawline and a pierced nose (a small stud). I think she is Indian, but I'm not very good at discerning such things. She was wearing a dark professional massage outfit and I could not get a real read on her boobs, but I'd guess she's a B cup. Overall, she was attractive in a unique sort of way. Her English was good.
Services: I'm not a huge fan of Swedish massage, but I asked for that to save a few quid as this was a TOFTT. The sign on the wall said no monkey business (as usual). The receptionist put me in the room with no instructions, so I had to make a quick decision: pants on or off. My (limited) experience has been: if the place offers extras and you leave them on, they will ask you to take them off, or even pull them off for you; if they don't offer extras and you go nude, you run the risk of an unhappy situation with the MT. As this is my new local place, I went pants on, and there they stayed until the end. I did tell Maya that I was comfortable if she wanted me nude but she either didn't hear, didn't understand, or didn't want anything to do with me naked.
Maya seemed to be pretty skilled at massage, although I don't really know Swedish massage that well so I can't be sure. The highlights/lowlights: she uses a lot of oil which required a shower after I got home; she was breathing hard during parts of the massage (I kidded myself that she was getting aroused by massaging my pasty white body); and she did not take any liberties at all with the draping. Nothing erotic occurred, and honestly she was so careful about keeping me covered, she hardly did any massage of my glutes. Perhaps I was sending the wrong signals by not being nude; who knows.
Verdict: Perhaps there is more on offer here as it has all the telltale signs of a place offering extras (open 10:30 to 9:00 daily, opaque windows, fair number of bad Google reviews, including one saying they need better soundproofing). I do give positive reviews for legit massages, but I don't feel this visit deserved one. Perhaps a revisit on the table nude ("Now that we know each other, I hope you don't mind...") will lead to better results.
