Popular media on UKEscorting.com (free site!)

UKPunting is a free, independent and not-for-profit paid sex buyer site.




Author Topic: Not loving the love in Denmark Hill  (Read 2427 times)


4 review(s) for Englishanalqueen (2 positive, 0 neutral, 2 negative) [Indexed by Admin]


https://www.adultwork.com/2505487 or https://www.adultwork.com/lovingthelove

Previously positively reviewed by the excitable MrFixit (who I see has got himself banned) at the link below. I do believe that Mrfixit saw her - his description is accurate - but there are massive inconsistencies between his account and my experience. I suspect he exaggerated the positives as he wanted to 'discover' this girl.

Sadly, she's not worth discovering. There's also a negative review from Marco linked to below where she suddenly stopped communicating when he was outside her block, she did the same to me (as described further down the thread) and evidently to some poor bastard on aw at midnight who got as far as her front door only to be ignored.

Despite this, having been let down earlier by an outcaller, I thought I'd give her a second chance as she's local to me, and she picked up the call, and arranged an appointment for 30 mins hence. Her flat is reasonably discreet - ground floor of a council block but with its own front door. She opened it and I was glad to see she's exactly the girl in the photos. She's tall, tanned, long brunette hair. Pretty, too - the recent unairbrushed photos in her gallery give a good indication of what she looks like. Strangely nordic looking, but she has a London accent.

In truth her looks were the only thing she has going for her. As she ushered me into the sparsely furnished, untidy flat I tried to make small talk, asking her how her plans to go to Australia were going. "Not going", she mumbled, then shut the bedroom door behind me to squirrel away the cash somewhere. She came back in and we had an awkward 5 mins with her trying to get Spotify to work as I asked that the TV loudly blaring out 'Ibiza anthems' be turned off. Sat in silence as she wrestled with technology, any attempt at conversation was shot down. She's very VERY sullen and uncommunicative - very depressed sounding, as if she hates other people's company as much as being a wg. I raised the incident where she cut off all communication with me the month before and her reply was something along the lines of "sorry, I'm in a bit of a daze right now".

She ushered me onto the bed - sorry, mattress on the floor, and initiated very superficial DFK (she's a smoker and a breath mint would have helped). Onto covered oral which was nothing to write home about, then RO which was pleasant - nice minge. She has very smooth, kissable skin, tanned all over. Very small boobs, though. Straight into reverse cowgirl which was quite unusual, and the best bit of the punt. However, at that moment I noticed a retching sound coming from the hallway. "Oh that's just my cat - he has bronchitis" she announced.
Bit more OW then tried for missionary but the old chap wasn't playing ball, so came on her chest and that was that. I went to wash my hands and the mangy, underdeveloped creature that had been retching outside the door waddled in. Jesus Christ, I like cats - I have a cat, but this poor wretched little thing was the most mood-killing ingredient that could have possibly entered the room. That would be, if there was a mood to kill. The last 2 minutes were spent in almost complete silence as Chloe stared into the distance - and as I ruminated on the line "bubbly and energetic with a loving caring nature that will make you feel right at home" from her profile.

I genuinely think she is depressed, despite the fact that there are pictures on her wall and her profile of her having fun with her mates - but any sense of youthful exuberance was completely lacking in her role as a hooker. She certainly needs a change of profession, and may well need a shrink.

The thought did cross my mind that if Ken Loach was directing a porn film it would have looked like this - set in an early brutalist LCC council estate in the failing autumnal light, on a mattress on the ground, with a guy almost apologetically beating off onto the chest of a hooker with an accusatory, dead eyed glare, as a bronchitic cat retched off camera.

Would recommend unconditionally.


4 review(s) found for Englishanalqueen linked to in above post (2 positive, 0 neutral, 2 negative)

Offline monstar

Sorry you had a bad punt backofthenet. Thanks for the review especially that last paragraph, I could feel your pain although it did make me chuckle too! Sorry :D

I was thinking of booking her as she is very cute, however it seems Mrfixit's review must have been exaggerated or bullshit as suspected by others in his thread and her reliability seems questionable at best, shame.

Hope you have a better one next time.

Cheers - actually, I would be interested to know if anyone else has a similar experience though I couldn't in good conscience recommend her. Except to Jimmyredcab, perhaps, as she's English and shows her face in pictures.  :hi:

Offline brolin_76

Sorry you had a bad punt backofthenet. Thanks for the review especially that last paragraph, I could feel your pain although it did make me chuckle too! Sorry :D

I was thinking of booking her as she is very cute, however it seems Mrfixit's review must have been exaggerated or bullshit as suspected by others in his thread and her reliability seems questionable at best, shame.

Hope you have a better one next time.

But you have seen her already Mrfixit. :cool:

https://www.adultwork.com/2505487 or https://www.adultwork.com/lovingthelove

As she ushered me into the sparsely furnished, untidy flat I tried to make small talk, asking her how her plans to go to Australia were going. "Not going", she mumbled, then shut the bedroom door behind me to squirrel away the cash somewhere. She came back in and we had an awkward 5 mins with her trying to get Spotify to work as I asked that the TV loudly blaring out 'Ibiza anthems' be turned off. Sat in silence as she wrestled with technology, any attempt at conversation was shot down. She's very VERY sullen and uncommunicative - very depressed sounding, as if she hates other people's company as much as being a wg. I raised the incident where she cut off all communication with me the month before and her reply was something along the lines of "sorry, I'm in a bit of a daze right now".
Thanks for the review, but I would have definitely walked.
The whole experience sounds grim, you really TOFTT there  :hi:


4 review(s) found for Englishanalqueen linked to in above post (2 positive, 0 neutral, 2 negative)

Undeveloped breasts, squalid flat, in a world of her own, unreliable. Has "junkie" written all over it to me.

Offline 3styler

I booked this girl recently, comms were good all the way up to the punt, then no answer. Seems like she likes wasting people's time.

Offline Clooney

I was seriously considering booking with her as she's local to me and I'd quite like a reliable and discreet lady within reasonable distance.

FWIW, I don't think that Mr Fixit was her pimp, boyfriend or other, as I PMed him for a bit more info and he came across as legit.

However, I think that it was one of two things or a combination of both with him...

1. He totally lucked out whereas everyone else got the usual treatment.

2. He was guilty of exaggerating the extent of his experience with her somewhat.

3. Or as I said, a bit of both.

Either way, she sounds none too great.

Bullet dodged, and to the OP, thank you for TOFTT.

Offline helmsdale

I was seriously considering booking with her as she's local to me and I'd quite like a reliable and discreet lady within reasonable distance.

FWIW, I don't think that Mr Fixit was her pimp, boyfriend or other, as I PMed him for a bit more info and he came across as legit.

However, I think that it was one of two things or a combination of both with him...

1. He totally lucked out whereas everyone else got the usual treatment.

2. He was guilty of exaggerating the extent of his experience with her somewhat.

3. Or as I said, a bit of both.

Either way, she sounds none too great.

Bullet dodged, and to the OP, thank you for TOFTT.

Maybe I was wrong in calling Fixit a pimp but Fixit's review just didn't ring true for me and now that we have this second review  vindicates me to some extent.

We know from the Madlin Moon thread that the level of service can vary considerably from punter to punter but you can't reconcile having to fuck on a mattress on the floor, this review, as opposed to a bed, Fixits review. Someone is telling porkies here and I think Adam called it correctly when he banned Fixit.



Banning reason: Making race postings after being barred from Off-Topic section for racist comments. Used up all chances.

is it me or is the first picture in her gallery - the schoolgirl one - photoshopped? Looks like her face on someone else's body...

Offline helmsdale

She certainly looks wierd in that photo with the head and neck out of all proprtion to the body and no defined waist.

I don't know why Fixit said she's British, she looks typically Hungarian to me.
Banning reason: Making race postings after being barred from Off-Topic section for racist comments. Used up all chances.


She certainly looks wierd in that photo with the head and neck out of all proprtion to the body and no defined waist.

I don't know why Fixit said she's British, she looks typically Hungarian to me.

 :wacko: :crazy: :wacko: :crazy:

I have to congratulate the author for the graphic report.Wow, Council flats,matraces on floors,scraggy cats,crap music,Ken Loach,fantastic.Why do we do it?Scene out of Taxi Driver with De Niro and Jodie  Foster.Nil by mouth Council estates.Time to boycott these piss takes quite frankly.Actually makes ones own safety at risk.

Offline lovingthelove

Ok so lovingthelove  here  :D so many bad things il start with the bed - I broke it maybe having sex 2 hard sorry I enjoy my job so might get a lil over excited  woops.... bed is fine now 
Cat - my cat has bronchitis unfortunately got it of his mum n dad...... so bacicly I brought a broken cat... but I still love him....pet ant just for Christmas.... but he's now big enough to go out so my lil tiger won't upset you.
council flat - it is private not council my flat dam I wish it was though!
Bad day - sorry I must of had a bad day.....who doesn't? but when I do I take day off 2 not ruin your experience.

I'm so English I dunno how else 2 prove it born in Windsor mum n dad defo English!  till the age of 18 now in London get 2 follow my music here my hobby other than sex lol...... Please tell me what music u would like on I'm more than happy 2 change it  :thumbsup:

Anything I have missed out please get in touch I'm only taking bookings on a.w. now so u can garantee we both meet up

Lovingthelove
Xx xx

P's deleting school girl coz u all say I look deformed lol

"Chloe", have you checked your first pic on your profile? You have left either your real name or someone else's on there  :dash: :dash:

Offline punk

Ok so lovingthelove  here  :D so many bad things il start with the bed - I broke it maybe having sex 2 hard sorry I enjoy my job so might get a lil over excited  woops.... bed is fine now 
Cat - my cat has bronchitis unfortunately got it of his mum n dad...... so bacicly I brought a broken cat... but I still love him....pet ant just for Christmas.... but he's now big enough to go out so my lil tiger won't upset you.
council flat - it is private not council my flat dam I wish it was though!
Bad day - sorry I must of had a bad day.....who doesn't? but when I do I take day off 2 not ruin your experience.

I'm so English I dunno how else 2 prove it born in Windsor mum n dad defo English!  till the age of 18 now in London get 2 follow my music here my hobby other than sex lol...... Please tell me what music u would like on I'm more than happy 2 change it  :thumbsup:

Anything I have missed out please get in touch I'm only taking bookings on a.w. now so u can garantee we both meet up

Lovingthelove
Xx xx

P's deleting school girl coz u all say I look deformed lol

your spelling is crap, worse than mine. So much for blair's generation.

your spelling is crap, worse than mine. So much for blair's generation.

Perhaps never been to a school :D

Offline 3styler

Wow business must be getting affected in a bad way for her to make a profile to post here. Just shows how useful this forum is.

Offline lovingthelove

This isn't a spelling test this is 2 see if im real and sure am :-) come and teach me how 2 spell and spank me if I get it wrong lol..... I Fuck better than I spell mwahhhh 2 you all xxxxx

Offline punk

This isn't a spelling test this is 2 see if im real and sure am :-) come and teach me how 2 spell and spank me if I get it wrong lol..... I Fuck better than I spell mwahhhh 2 you all xxxxx

not judging by the review, hopefully your improve. :unknown:

This isn't a spelling test this is 2 see if im real and sure am :-) come and teach me how 2 spell and spank me if I get it wrong lol..... I Fuck better than I spell mwahhhh 2 you all xxxxx

Honey there are boat-hugging refugees who have trekked+swam+sailed directly from the densely canopied inaccessible inner rainforests of Um-Bongo from tribes that have never seen a white man or eaten pasta, who spell and speak English better than you do.
« Last Edit: September 23, 2014, 09:39:35 PM by JamesRockford »

Offline lovingthelove

But do they Fuck as good as me???!!

Offline punk

But do they Fuck as good as me???!!

judging by the two negative reviews and the one punter who got banned, but give you a positive review, its not looking too good for you. :hi:

And now your banned.

But do they Fuck as good as me???!!

That will have to remain one of life's unanswered questions like "Do we really have free will?" or "What is it like to be a bat?"

We'll never really know now for sure. 

Goodbyeeeee
« Last Edit: September 25, 2014, 12:43:42 PM by JamesRockford »




Latest videos on UKEscorting.com (free site!)

Latest images on UKEscorting.com (free site!)