Report is from approx. 2 weeks ago. My first time visiting Chrissy's Angels in Hull - I've avoided parlours for over 10 years as they offer a budget, medicore experience, at least from my recollection from much younger punting days.
External Link/Members OnlyI happened to be walking past - I've always known the name of the place from online reports, being named on the local news etc. but never bothered to look up the exact location as I've never been tempted by parlours in recent years. Well I saw the sign walking past, thought "Oh it's here, always wondered where it is". Feling horny I thought "Why don't I give myself an Xmas present?". I had no idea of costs or rotas before walking in - just took a chance.
Entrance was very discreet and the door opened quickly by an extremely hot receptionist in tight gym leggings with the spandex stretched over her wiggling butt with her thong lines sticking through - that's my biggest weakness - if she'd been offering services then I'd definitely have taken her! She explained the only girl available was Jasmine (15 mins wait), so I took a seat and waited. In the meantime I got out my phone to check Jasmine's pics on the website - she looked good and had some good reviews.
Once Jasmine came in to greet me, she immediately tried to upsell me to a 2 girl experience - I forgot the name of the girl and have looked at all the pics on the website, but can't find anyone to match the 2nd girl. £100 for 30 mins but they'd throw in some free girl-on-girl interaction as an extra. Seemed like a decent offer so agreed to it and handed over the extra money. Jasmine was good looking but a bit rough - obviously been in "the game" for a long time and fucked thousands of men. The second girl was also quite good looking and I thought I'd have a good time with both of them.
The experience can basically be summarised in the following timeline:
00:01 - Girls snog each other and lick each other's boobs with some of the worst-sounding fake dirty talk I've ever heard (give me that fucking tit in my fucking mouth and let me fucking taste it).
00:02 - Girl 1 puts condom on me, blows me for all of 10 secs then jumps on me and starts to rides me saying "fuck I can't wait for your cock, get it straight inside me". Girl 2 sits next to her and is rubbing her pussy doing the fake dirty talk again (ohhh, I'm going to cum) - what, after 2 seconds of touching yourself??
00:04 - Girl 2 says "don't be greedy, now I want that fucking cock" and pushes the other girl off, changes the condom and starts to rides me. Girl 1 says "Just going for a piss, be right back" - how classy
00:06 - Girl 1 comes back from said piss, jumps straight onto my face and says "lick me and make me cum" - she had one of those large labias with lots of flaps that soaks up piss if not washed properly and I was gagging as she put her pussy in my face. Couldn't move much as I was pinned down by Girl 2 riding me still. Tried to avoid licking directly and she obviously got the message I didn't want to be doing it.
00:08 - Girl 2 gets off me, "get on top of me with your big fucking cock" - switched to missionary and pounded away, cumming within 30 secs as she cradled my balls (that old trick)
00:09 - Girl 1 starts to get dressed and says "it was lovely to meet you"
00:10 - Girl 2 stays behind and asks if there's anything else I'd like. I said "well we still have 20 mins left" and she was like, huh, but you've cum already.
00:11 - Bit of small talk with Girl 2 but she wasn't interested in doing anything else. Asked if they had a shower - I didn't actually want a shower but was hoping they'd have mouthwash in the bathroom to remove the taste of piss-stained pussy from my mouth. Went to the bathroom and there was no shower gel in the shower, no mouthwash in the sink, and the girl hadn't flushed her piss from before.
00:13 - Left the establishment remembering why I hadn't visited a parlour in 10 years.
I certainly won't be going back.
