Backup plan was Cai
External Link/Members Only reviewed by bonapati, it must have been a very good day, many cocks ago. She is Russian, dark haired, apparently has a flawless body, 36B tits, great arse, slim, size 8, 5 feet 9, mid twenties, what could possibly go wrong?
Fucking everything!
Apart from comms which were normal.
Place, a basement shithole, some kind of poor quality conversion in a hotel building, front glass doors with metal grille like you get in an old fashioned lift behind it, opens outwards, she took a while to answer my knock, there is no bell.
Straight into the bedroom and an unkempt bed, met by an unkempt Cai who has more of a lantern jaw and more of a Far Eastern look than the photos, really not good looking, a mile off the selfies and a hundred miles off the photoshopped pics. She had made a Boris Johnson level of effort on her appearance, dry dark hair, no makeup or fragrance, a cheap housecoat and fluffy slippers over basic underwear. Surely the service would make up for it, my jaunty "did you just get up" was met with a smirk but she was cold behind the eyes.
I always arrive at punts well dressed, well groomed, smell good with fresh breath and am often whore complimented, you know the score, you smell good, handsome man bla bla and normally quickly build that faux rapport that makes us feel like we are connected, at least for the next hour.
Cai said “smell good” with a fake smile, I paid up, she stashed and said shower then led me to the grotty bathroom and gave me a threadbare towel, leaving me to wash my bits.
Back in the room and onto the squeaky bed, undressed and fish kissed, I know, I think I just invented the phrase, basically she made her lips like a fish, offering minimal access and no tongue. Clothes came off to reveal a size 10 with slightly floppy, smallish natural tits, an athletic shaped physique with none of the tautness, like she's been eating badly and not exercising and a biggish arse. Naked I tried to up the making out ante, she wasn't having it, she just wanted to get on with business and dove into a side on bout of fast, toothy owo, I asked her to reposition between my legs and she continued, although the toothiness increased, interspersed with comedy level fake moaning and some sloppy running her trout mouth up and down the shaft along with occasional ball licking, it got me hard, despite her poor efforts.
Condom on, lube in, cowgirl, she was not tight, must've been busy, then doggy, I was bored by this stage, asked her to get on her knees by the badly placed wardrobe mirror, it was a problem, so she knelt on the bed and sucked/wanked me with spit and lube and I was ready and took over, aiming at her tits and as I grunted she put her hands out like a fucking cricketer about to make a catch and robbed me of my money shot by catching each spurt as I looked on incredulously. She immediately ran off to the bathroom to wash up and gargled so loudly I thought she was going to break into fucking song! She offered me my towel and I went to clean off the lube, spit and feelings of abject despair.
Back in the room, we were just under half an hour in and I suggested politely we make it a half hour booking. She went ballistic, minimum £250, you stay how long you want but I gave you services and you pay, no half hour rate. I sighed and put my pants on, explaining I pay for time, not services and called the agency as she tapped away at her phone. I explained my position, shit venue, below average girl and performance, request to make it 30 minutes, they suggested she returned £100, she refused and carried on ranting. I left, leaving the door far enough open that she would have step outside to close it and risk being seen by the workmen overhead, childish but the most satisfying part of the whole episode.
Diva called, and texted, very apologetic, offering a £30 discount out of their commission on a future punt of my choice, fandabbydozy!
