Bookham Chinese massage shop (Yuka) - further review - borderline negative

[webpunter]

External Link/Members Only

Am linking KL's recent review as these are [edit:  not] easily visible when no Awank number
https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=315929.msg3300321;topicseen#msg3300321

Wanted a quick R&T & tanks emptied & after some positive visits over past few month's - incl. with edging queen lisa - thought i'd drop by & see what was available 'on the hoof'
Only 1/2 hour as on a tight schedule this time so 30 + 20
Mamasan Lisa was on the blower gabbling in Mandarin.  Got a smile, herrow & was told two burds available
She calls in Yuka to the reception & my face said it all.  She's deffo one of the older ones there
SpaceRD hit the nail on the head [so to write] re hair.  I never pay for extras @ chinese AMP's - don't want kit off 

I asked Lisa bout the other burd & the answer was 5-10 minnit 
The clock was ticking for where i had to be after so a snap decision not to walk
Had Lisa not been there i would have probably done a 180 with a sharp exit
Yuka picked up on this & despite my comment bout wanting 4 hand [a load of B O Llox] she wasn't convinved
5 mins or so massage which was actually good & ironed out a few tight spots in my neck & shoulder then onto CC's & RU's
A novelty as its rare any massage there pour moi 
I initiate the flip & its johnsons out & onto what turned out to be an OK HJ, with one caveat - refer below
I made some comments like magic hands & she then says sumfink such as 'so you like me'
The clock was ticking down so it was finale time.  This turned out to be like a firework rocket that fizzles out
Just like with KL's experience she stopped after 2 spurts & i say carry on, however the moment was lost
All of the other burds there carry on going eeking out every last drop    until you tell them to stop as its getting too sensitive

I'm being extremely generous with a neutral
Coz the main part of the HJ was skillfully delivered & Yuka was tugging me off for bout 23 mins or so of the 30
Rather than other gaffs where things start after 20 mins on a 1/2 hour booking    & 30 + 20 ain't a disaster

Would i recommend - yes @ Bookham tho not with Yuka
[stick to Lisa & others like Shasha / Min or TingTong [edit - freudian slip: TingTing  ], tho not sure when the last two will be back]

Will i return - not for a while - kinda Bookham-ed out.  Back into AW indies & parlours

[Kamilondon]

Well mate, as I see you had a similar experience with this lady. As I have said in some of my replies on my post, I don’t think I will be in a rush to get back there anytime soon.
Think I will try sampling some of the other girls at the well reviewed place in egham.
Have had some great times there in the past.

[MrMatrix]

She stopped after 2 spurts AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH
You'd think as an experienced massuse she'd know, you DONT stop half way though...
Bad luck Webby. I too would be Bookhamed out after that. Still it does mean that an earlier phone call booking Lisa isnt a waste of time.

[Kamilondon]

She stopped after 2 spurts AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH
You'd think as an experienced massuse she'd know, you DONT stop half way though...
Bad luck Webby. I too would be Bookhamed out after that. Still it does mean that an earlier phone call booking Lisa isnt a waste of time.

I had exactly the same experience with this woman! Total anti climax to what is supposed to be a happy ending, in this case a not so happy ending!

[webpunter]

She then immediately reaches for a few sheets of kitchen roll
i'm thinking WTF
Stopping mid flow there was some left in the tanks
& i had to sort the problem later in the day 
Reck i'm an easy ton up+ on visits there over the years & its never happened before
Even the burd there forever ago who resembled SusanBoyle completed the mission
Though i did have my eyes shut [mentally flicking thru HL / fave massage burds] for most of the time 
Crikey when Lisa has been on the job its the other way round, she keeps on going
Until LittleWP has Mr floppy set in 

[Kamilondon]

She then immediately reaches for a few sheets of kitchen roll
i'm thinking WTF
Stopping mid flow there was some left in the tanks
& i had to sort the problem later in the day 
Reck i'm an easy ton up+ on visits there over the years & its never happened before
Even the burd there forever ago who resembled SusanBoyle completed the mission
Though i did have my eyes shut [mentally flicking thru HL / fave massage burds] for most of the time 
Crikey when Lisa has been on the job its the other way round, she keeps on going
Until LittleWP has Mr floppy set in

And that’s exactly what we need, a complete drainage of the old pipe work !

[webpunter]

Unlike after having a super hot chicken madras it was like draining out an old radiator in the morning 

And that’s exactly what we need, a complete drainage of the old pipe work !

[MrMatrix]

She then immediately reaches for a few sheets of kitchen roll
i'm thinking WTF
Stopping mid flow there was some left in the tanks
& i had to sort the problem later in the day 
Reck i'm an easy ton up+ on visits there over the years & its never happened before
Even the burd there forever ago who resembled SusanBoyle completed the mission
Though i did have my eyes shut [mentally flicking thru HL / fave massage burds] for most of the time 
Crikey when Lisa has been on the job its the other way round, she keeps on going
Until LittleWP has Mr floppy set in

You've seen a Susan Boyle look alike Webby. Holy fuck, were you that desperate at the time
She must have had big tits..... surely...

[Baxter63]

You've seen a Susan Boyle look alike Webby. Holy fuck, were you that desperate at the time
She must have had big tits..... surely...

The trials and tribulations of going into a regular venue shop. You can't really back out given that you're, supposedly, there for just a massage   

I think i was massaged by her - or another one with a bit of a Mongolian look. Sang 'All things bright and beautiful' and 'Greensleeves' , amongst other numbers. Even had the Chinese instrumental versions to sing along to. She did get confused on 'ye'll tak the high road an' ah'll tak the low road'  - mind you she was on my bonnie, bonnie, banks at the time. Said she attended the Chinese Christian Church and was in a choir. Lisa joined us for a grand chorus of Greensleeves.

[webpunter]

Desperate doesn't begin to describe it
I could feel a 180 being initiated in my head
Little brain in charge says no
No idea bout tits, nothing visible & i never pay for kit off in an AMP [once with Lisa forever ago]
Don't usually like chinese bods, pale skin small tits & hairy muffs
There for the HJ
Anyways most of the time i had my eyes shut

You've seen a Susan Boyle look alike Webby. Holy fuck, were you that desperate at the time
She must have had big tits..... surely...

[webpunter]

Is 'grand chorus of Greensleeves' a euphemism for 4-hander [as in finish ?]

I'll let you crack on with your [bible] bashing 

The trials and tribulations of going into a regular venue shop. You can't really back out given that you're, supposedly, there for just a massage   

I think i was massaged by her - or another one with a bit of a Mongolian look. Sang 'All things bright and beautiful' and 'Greensleeves' , amongst other numbers. Even had the Chinese instrumental versions to sing along to. She did get confused on 'ye'll tak the high road an' ah'll tak the low road'  - mind you she was on my bonnie, bonnie, banks at the time. Said she attended the Chinese Christian Church and was in a choir. Lisa joined us for a grand chorus of Greensleeves.