Author Topic: Laura petal long eaton  (Read 4514 times)


7 review(s) for LAURA PETAL (1 positive, 3 neutral, 3 negative) [Indexed by Goldfinch]

Offline Shelby63

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So I had an appointment in long eaton, I fancied a more mature punt, sent a couple of emails off to Laura, and a couple more well reviewed ladies in the area, I only received a reply from Laura so I arranged for a 11-30am meeting, arrived at the road I was told to park on, I was then called by Laura this is where things started tog get weird, told to stay on the phone and then I had to follow a series of directions, It felt a bit like challenge Aneka, eventually arrived at the house usual hiding behind the door trick, first impressions was just about what I was expecting, once inside she starts this constant chattering, she's clearly as mad as a box of frogs, shown upstairs told to strip off whilst Laura went for a pee, upon her return she bent over to carry out an inspection and a sniff test of my cock, the relief that I felt upon passing,took me right back to my driving test, she then starts asking what it was I wanted whilst all the time pointing out that I had only booked 30 minutes at £70.00, so did I want a massage, if I'm totally honest the combination of her constant talking really large bloated belly, untidy hair made my mind up to have a massage, laid on the double bed, Laura kneeling between my legs started what I can only describe as a torturous back massage, I almost had to stop her a couple of times, it was like taking a kidney punch, upon the turn over, asked again bearing in mind you only have 30 minutes, do you want to put it in my pushy or buy, I replied you had better wake him up before he can go anywhere, she started bringing him to life with a combination of a hand job and a blow job, really weird technique and more pain as I could feel her teeth, I had to ask her to get her tits out, she said she keeps the outfit on due to her belly, so she just flopped a decent size pair out, I started playing with them and her pushy, absolutely zero reaction to anything that I was doing, maybe I was just no good, but then came the comment don't wait for me to cum as at my age I don't, wished I'd not bothered trying lol!, she then rubbered me up lubed herself up and climbed aboard, after a couple of minutes she said do you like doggy, I could feel with the combination of Laura really not doing it for me and condom droop, I thought I'd try from behind, I managed another couple of minutes but decided it wasn't going to happen so I asked her to finish me off with a hand job, it took what seemed an age, all the time she kept jibbering on, again she tried a bj teeth again, told her to carry on with her hand, finally got there, I couldn't wait to get out of there, no shower offered or clean up, got dressed quickly and even then all the way to the front door she kept talking about her ex husbands being from the South, at least I think that's what she was saying, if I'm honest I had pretty much glazed over by this time, left the house and then the walk back to my car down Laura's Road turn past some shops down another road and finally got back, £70.00 lighter and then questioning myself why I still partake in this hobby, no doubt I will get the urge again soon and off I will go again but definitely not to see Laura.
« Last Edit: June 10, 2021, 06:25:32 pm by CoolTiger »

Offline hunkybc

Thanks for the review. It sounds herrendous.  I've seen her advertise on AW but falls outside the category of a what I call a hot mild.

Better luck next time with the punting.

Offline Newtothisstuff

It sounds like very little has changed. I saw her a long time ago and didn't think she had both paddles in the water back then either. It was the banter that really did my head in. The constant assault on the eardrums about ex partners and some weird religious crap just wasn't called for. What made me laugh was that she was constantly telling me that I had to be quiet so neighbours didn't hear anything, but she hardly stopped flapping her lips. Even mid BJ she'd stop to say something else.
On the plus side, it sounds like she's finally replaced her bed. You had to lie on one side because the other was broken.

Offline Birdhunter

Thanks for the review you have saved me some hard earned cash, I was about to make a booking.

Offline kingkong69

Very clever use of camera angles so donts show her big belly :)

Offline hungryboy

Crikey! Sounds an horrendous experience!

Offline Shelby63

I know exactly what you mean Newtothisstuff she decided mid suck to tell me that she eats 10 slices of bread a day lol!

Offline hunkybc


Offline Newtothisstuff

I've just looked back and seen the comment I posted back in August 2016.  It seems that not much has changed since then except except the bed.

I've got to agree with the comments so far.
When I arrived I had to park on a different street and then she made me wait as a neighbour was out in his front garden and she didn't want anyone to see a man arrive.
As soon as I got there she let me in and then told me to be quiet. This didn't seem to apply to her though as she kept talking about the strangest shit!  At one point she tried to get me to convert to Buddhism! This was before we'd even gone to the bedroom.
Once we got upstairs she 'inspected' my cock. She sniffed it, licked it and even lifted it up to check my balls. When she was satisfied I lay on the bed. I had to keep to one side as she said the bed was knackered on the other. She started to give me the weirdest blowjob. She yanked at my cock like she was trying to throttle a chicken while only ever putting the tip in her mouth. Every few seconds she'd stop to carry on her insane ramblings. When she said she loved blowjobs and could do them all day, I just thought 'you're gonna have to luv, coz this ain't doing it for me.'
She then took her knickers off and unusually for a WG she has a fur lined panty warmer. After playing with the hair for a short while I tried screwing her missionary. Again, it just seemed weird. She just lay there like a rag doll. All the time, she's still flapping her lips about religion and her ex.
I then tried anal with her. This is one area where she gets better marks. She didn't charge extra and was happy to do it. It was a first for me so I can't comment on whether she's better or worse than others. Having been turned down by a few girls for being too big, it was good to find someone who would do it. The only problem was that she still didn't shut up.
Her plus points are a hairy muff for the novelty factor when seeing a WG and the fact that she does anal.
Her minus points are:
Never stops talking about the weirdest crap. A psychiatrist could base an entire conference on this woman.
Terrible blowjobs.
She doesn't seem to be involved with what's going on in the room. (TBH, she seems to be on a different planet).

Would I go back?  No.
Should you go? Not unless you have a hearing problem and want anal.
« Last Edit: June 10, 2021, 10:58:14 pm by Newtothisstuff »

Offline Shelby63

Absolutely spot on, when I did try to engage in conversation about what she was babbling on about, she seemed to glaze over and then mid sentence she would start a totally unrelated topic, I have seen a few ladies who if I'm being honest are a sandwich short of a picnic, but most of them I didnt mind as the service was good, this was assault on my hearing with a crap service.

Offline TomSawyer2112

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Glad to see a couple of reviews as i had planned to visit this lady on her next tour of Nottingham,i think i`ll pass after reading these comments.
Banned reason: Did not want to share his punts on the Forum
Banned by: CoolTiger

Offline Smoothballs

Saw her a few years ago before I joined UKP. Found her very eccentric, verging on being away with the faeries. I was attracted by her hairy muff and the fact she did anal.
She is on my don't bother ever again list. Better mature ones about.

Offline shagmore

That about sums her up, thats why i gave her a negative on here. At least she didn't keep telling you to be quiet due to the neighbouring.
AT times I think some people are in the wrong job