External Link/Members Only£35 for 60+ minutes + £40 for B2B.
Found this on UKP when lockdown was over and on my return from town I found the GT ad and sent a text to start enquiries.
Open and had availability, less than ten minutes from where I was so booked in for 15 minutes time.
Absolute nightmare to park, either on the double yellows on the road outside or unmade roads or open ground either side. Ended up five minutes away on a housing estate that was least Chatsworth like of other side roads that I tried.
Walked up and rang the bell with my mask on. Tiny 30 something with mask and curves answered the door and asked me to take my shoes off in the waiting area, where there's hand sanitizer. No problem.
Down a corridor with rooms either side and into one on the right. Typical homemade, sturdy table covered on towels. It's a little wider than average, like me. There's a chair in one corner for my clothes and bits and bobs. A bedroom chest of drawers in another corner for their bits and bobs. Finally a sink in a third corner with running water. I didn't ask about a shower as I was almost twenty minutes late and wasn't offered one.
Straight down to business as I disrobe and she covers the towels with a roll of paper. No boxers, no drapes no towels, no issue. I think her name is Anna. An hour for £35 is agreed, I pay with two twenties and get change as she offers HE in a whisper for £20.
I've cocked up because of the parking fiasco, I've not had s chance to get to an ATM so £50 all I've got and I'm now down to £15. I explain and it gets a bit confusing. At one point, she tries to get me to change to a 30 minutes booking, including HE but I pass.
Anna is not here very long, as her lack of much English would explain. The shop is new, only two weeks old, with clear signs outside, typical of the current parlour scene, next to a hand wash place, in a small row of shops/takeaways.
The massage starts at my shoulders and continues for a while on my torso, arms and neck. It feels structured and proficient using what feels like the heel of her hands or knuckles to press into the flesh, without being too painful. She's at the top of the table a lot and reaches over the back of my head, which feels comforting.
Looks wise, dark shoulder length hair with a pleasant face from what I can see above the mask. A chain necklace and what looks like Primani style cotton tee top with a pleasing amount of cleavage with matching, though not coordinated thigh length skirt with ruffles. Attire that wouldn't look out of place on a beach.
The use of oil is kept to a minimum at this point and not much attention to my legs, at all. Some fumblings around the backside and although no CC swipes, some reach throughs that get my interest as she pressed around the base of my shaft and sac.
The next upsell is body to body for £40 and I repeat again that I've only got £15 left. £10 if she keeps the fiver change I offered. So she suggests a mobile phone payment.
I'm in a happy place and curious so I agree but she carries on as before, albeit working her way up from my feet to my inner thighs again. I let this go as it could be a lack of translation.
It's about 40 minutes since I walked through the door at this point, she wipes my back down with paper towels and gestures for the turn over. More oil on the legs and up to the dangly bits. Some mutterings about paying for body to body that end in my sitting up to try a payment from my punting card to her bank account.
For whatever reason, it doesn't work despite a few attempts and I think she says that she will come with me to a cash machine after to get the extra. It's tempting to scrub the extra but it's a sunny day and this is my first massage since lockdown.
Apparently, I have a trusting face from what she can see so, she whips off her bra and top, then tights, panties and skirt. Naked, she could be closer to 40 than I thought and there's some wrinkling to the muffin top around her waist. I'm no Adonis, I've no complaints.
Oil on my chest and boy bits and she leans over to rub her 32/34Bs on my moobs and starts getting life in mini muffin. I'm conscious of the fact that there can't be much of the original hour left so I let my hands wander where they will, with no admonishments. As I'm starting to worry that the body to body part will be chest to chest, she climbs aboard and rubs mini muffin over her chest and between her jumper bunnies.
A few more positions, much more oil, a few calls to slow down and some uninhibited wandering of my hands and fingers and this is turning into a pleasant afternoon.
After I've popped, she stays squatting over me for a while, admiring her handiwork as I catch my breath. Paper towels and wet wipes to clean up a bit then over to the sink.
I'm on wobbly legs as another girl comes in. She looks familiar and we realise that we've seen each other in another local massage store. There's some chat between them, that seems to reassure Anna that I'm not a bad customer. I try the payment transfer again before I'm given the WiFi password.
Bingo! The money goes through and it's all laughs and giggles before the usual "come back soon", "next time four hand" and so on and so on.
Out the door and it's well over the hour since I arrived and getting on for two hours since I was supposed to arrive. Some of that was chitchat and sorting out the money but I certainly got better VFM than elsewhere.
Based on lack of parking alone, I'm not sure if I will go back but I'm also curious what experiences being a regular might yield.
