Olivia @ Agency Barracuda - AKA - Darlene @ Diva. Earls Court. TOFTT

[The Night King]

The lockdown has been unlocked. After 10 weeks of going stir crazy I caved. I have deemed myself low risk and, with all the girls starting to trickle back in to the market, much like Dominic Cummings, I wanted to do a test drive to check my penis was working ok before ploughing through the A-Z of Bucharest.

I booked via Barracuda. £200 for a 1 hour incall. Here are her links and her varying stats:

27 yrs / 5'5" / Size 8 : External Link/Members Only

23 yrs / 5'3" / Size 8 : External Link/Members Only

23 yrs / 5'4" / Size 10 : External Link/Members Only

Comms : Standard agency. All good.

Apartment : Earls Court. Nice upmarket area near the tube. 1 bed studio flat at the top of a converted townhouse. Up 5 or 6 floors of grimy stairs with no lift! The apartment itself was quite nice with a living area although the bedroom was quite small and basic.

The girl : I could see the photos were heavily 'shopped but there was something about her that made me pick up the phone and take the punt. In her pics she looks great in the coloured underwear but a bit scary in the black set, I thought. On arrival I was pleased that there was no hiding behind the door, rather she promisingly came out on to  the landing to greet me in a tiny black gown atop the very expensive looking pink lingerie set she displays in her photos. So as she lead me in to the living area I had a great view of her stockinged legs - seams straight! So far so promising. As we sat down I'm checking her out and she looked like she'd made an effort with her appearance so we started to discuss terms.  She tells me she's a Moldovan / Romanian mix. Yeah, right! Been living here for 6 years so I'm thinking she's not new to this game at all. I'm pretty sure she's a recycled profile / girl. Someone who I may have skipped past many times before with ropier photos but her new pics have worked out nicely for her - Kerching! 

The punt : I told her my requirements were FK to which she answered "Yes" but sounded unsure. I pushed her and she said "Lets see". I told her OWO to which she tried to say "That's extra" so I said "No way" and she caved on that. We're having a nice friendly chat, she's giving me the eyes and I feel confident I will be able to get the best out of the situation ahead! Now at this point she's sitting next to me, still in her black satin gown and she looked incredibly tempting in what she said was a complete set of Agent Provocateur underwear. Massive surprise -she doesn't look like her photos. She has lovely long dark hair, a nice dark tan and she's sort of pretty but has this kind of dish like face - a bit like one of the rougher Geordie Shore girls or Jesy Nelson from Little Mix.  Anyway, after 3 months out of action there was no way I wasn't going ahead with this.

The action started off really well. She undid her gown and underneath she had lovely natural tits which I could see through the underwear. Playing with those after so long was heaven! She also turns out to have a pretty big belly which wasn't too much of a surprise as she's holding her arm across it to hide it in most of the profile pictures. The kissing starts off quite slow and there is a bit of FK but definitely not DFK. Now often this can start slowly and build nicely as you go through the gears in a punt but unfortunately for me this was just not about to happen tonight. We're still on the couch and she's letting me lead everything, which is ok. I manoeuvre her on to her knees in front of me for some OWO which is pretty good, if not amazing. No real eye contact. Then it's off to the bedroom.

Now this is where it all becomes a bit routine and average. The punt is now going from a borderline neutral to a negative. She takes off her shoes and bra and fucking hell she's got more rolls on her tummy than Greggs. She's also clearly following a routine now and it feels a bit forced. Her kissing starts to follow a distinct pattern which I've had before. Where the girl does a 1-2-3 kiss / peck / bit of tongue...then turns her head away. So fucking annoying! Then after a bit of messing around and oral we get on to the main event and her eyes are shut with her head turned 90 degrees away the whole time unless I keep insisting otherwise. What a terrible shag this is.

After it's all over and I've showered we have another friendly chat and she's quite engaging which would have been better saved for the main event where it felt like she'd just gone in to a bubble, presumably to block out my hideous Night King facial features 

Oh well! Please Sergei can you send back some of your proper hotties ASAP!

[Meursault]

Thanks OP.
She sounds like a £60 p&d girl not £200!
I guess she has to pay her underwear bills.

[PatMacGroin]

I've always assumed "Eternity Girls", "Baracuda" and a bunch of others were all the same crowd operating under several different websites to give the boys the impression they were making a choice.

Not been sure about Diva. From all the positive reviews they get I felt maybe that same crowd rotated their best/newest girls through Diva before they got put out to pasture on the other sites.

I used "Eternity Girls" 3 times before I discovered AW, and a long time before I found UKP. On each occasion the girl was decade(s) older than advertised and only a passing resemblance to images on the website. 2 of the WG's I met looked like they had made atleast one visit to a cut price plastic surgeon and the results were just gruesome. So after that 3rd chance the alluring photoshopped galleries could no longer tempt me.

It's obvious these places use photoshopped images, but I'd go even further. From years of looking at these galleries I've decided they have a bit of a police foto-fit, mix and match, photoshopping factory system going on. Literally picking out body shots from their archive of girls in identical poses and pasting on the faces that they think most closely resemble these ropier WG's as they could have looked at their best. Sometimes swapping features like eyes, lips etc. So many of the pictures just look too similar and weirdly disproportionate in an alien/Japanese manga like way.

I'd have shared a stronger warning when you posted this WG on the TOFTT thread. But I genuinely thought you were joking and were experienced enough to avoid.

Hope you get better enjoyment from your future punts now the lock down is being relaxed.

[bedhedred]

The lockdown has been unlocked. After 10 weeks of going stir crazy I caved. I have deemed myself low risk and, with all the girls starting to trickle back in to the market, much like Dominic Cummings, I wanted to do a test drive to check my penis was working ok before ploughing through the A-Z of Bucharest.

 

[The Night King]

I've always assumed "Eternity Girls", "Baracuda" and a bunch of others were all the same crowd operating under several different websites to give the boys the impression they were making a choice.

Not been sure about Diva. From all the positive reviews they get I felt maybe that same crowd rotated their best/newest girls through Diva before they got put out to pasture on the other sites.

I used "Eternity Girls" 3 times before I discovered AW, and a long time before I found UKP. On each occasion the girl was decade(s) older than advertised and only a passing resemblance to images on the website. 2 of the WG's I met looked like they had made atleast one visit to a cut price plastic surgeon and the results were just gruesome. So after that 3rd chance the alluring photoshopped galleries could no longer tempt me.

It's obvious these places use photoshopped images, but I'd go even further. From years of looking at these galleries I've decided they have a bit of a police foto-fit, mix and match, photoshopping factory system going on. Literally picking out body shots from their archive of girls in identical poses and pasting on the faces that they think most closely resemble these ropier WG's as they could have looked at their best. Sometimes swapping features like eyes, lips etc. So many of the pictures just look too similar and weirdly disproportionate in an alien/Japanese manga like way.

I'd have shared a stronger warning when you posted this WG on the TOFTT thread. But I genuinely thought you were joking and were experienced enough to avoid.

Hope you get better enjoyment from your future punts now the lock down is being relaxed.

Thanks for the feedback Pat. At the end of the day a punt is a punt. If you don't buy a ticket you can't win the lottery! Even though this was a very overpriced ticket  Often the hotties have too much photoshop so sorting the wheat from the chaff isn't always easy.

Analysing the photos is always useful. I've uploaded the one that I liked best and is most insightful. It's definitely her. She wore that exact outfit. The photoshop has slimmed her down a lot and re-shaped her face & put a general sheen on her. The arm across her tummy is to disguise her midriff. I don't think it's other girls' body parts in this instance.

[The Night King]

Pic attached

Hidden Image/Members Only

[magnetico]

her eyes are shut with her head turned 90 degrees away the whole time unless I keep insisting otherwise.

That deserves an instant neg review