External Link/Members OnlyA turd from Diva, delivered with some half-assed apologies after I complained loudly about this shit of a performance.
Booked for 4pm in the afternoon, which in my experience is the time that has the highest probability to find the escort actually awake and not yet ground to a mince by a few bookings.
Diva directed me to a basement flat in Paddington. Some difficulties to find the place, which let me linger around on the busy street a little bit too much for my liking, particularly given the quite populated Islamic prayer centre next door. The girl eventually opened the door revealing the right flat and calling me in.
Stesha "welcomed" me with the classic lazy attitude of the irredeemably bad escort: bored and lifeless stare, not a hint of a smile, monotone voice. I should have walked, but the cold, humid day led me to hoping this would be one of those (luckily not too rare) cases where an initially hostile Romanian prostitute would end up becoming a bubbly and friendly sex kitten by the end of the meeting. Sadly, this was bound not to be one of those cases, and it ended up being one of those shitty punt that leave one demoralised and frustrated.
That's not because Stesha is not attractive, because - without being the extraordinary hottie I was hoping - she's definitely not too bad. Her face has some cute traits (although her pictures are all definitely flattering, and her bovine stare has nothing of the intriguing look that emerges from the photos), and while her dyed hair is definitely crappy (a natural black or brown would surely be more attractive) she's objectively a beautiful girl (7). Her body is really good for people with my taste (skinny girls with beautifully designed ass and long legs), although many people would probably find her too slim: small tits, beautiful curves, great ass, juicy pussy, tiny feet (8.5).
What makes the whole experience not worth it and actively toxic is her attitude, right from the beginning consisting in a mixture of boredom and vague hostility, that combines with the location to delineate a grim scenario that is definitely not the right way to get into the right mood. As soon as she led me into the flat I could smell that the whole flat stinks deeply of cigarettes. The flat was dark, and she took me to her room, dimly lit by a smart light that she had set to a depressing purple. When in the middle of a cunnilingus I suddenly noticed that the light was giving her a blueish, sickish skin tone I laughed about it and said "this blue light is so weird" and she growled at me "IT'S PURPLE, NOT BLUE" in response dense with badly hidden contempt. What a cunt.
Another aspect I found off-putting was her voice: her youthful looks are somewhat spoiled by her coarse tone of voice, which gives her an air of old, experienced tart. I was hoping she would have some level of childish bubbliness, a light voice, some playful attitude, but none of this.
I asked to take a shower, and she handed me an obviously used towel. The shower looked dirty and unmaintained, with broken handles and stained walls. I tried to dry myself up as much as possible but the damp towel didn't make it too easy. Obviously, the girl is one of those idiots who make a fuss as soon as their client has a few drops of water on their forehead: she made a big deal of drying me up better, as if getting even just a little bit wet due to the shower water was the worst possible thing. Obviously this alone is the sign that escorting is not for her: good sex is sweaty, and if you can't tolerate even water you're not going to like sweat. And tolerate she didn't, repeatedly teasing me or showing annoyance during the session whenever she saw me sweating (which happened profusely because the room had a temperature of probably 25C).
Back on the bed I tried to understand if she was one of those girls that can look hostile but turn into friendly and sexy at the right moment, but she quickly clarified how things were by giving me the most ridiculous peck on the lips with her mouth tightly shut: I tried to kiss her a couple more times but it became soon evident that she would not open her lips. She doesn't do FK, let alone DFK.
I caressed her gently, and she almost immediately started lamenting that she was ticklish, always with a tone mid way through the general observation and the angry complaint. I then started kissing her body, receiving mostly a plain bored look in return, and no main signs of life when I went down on her and feasted on her beautiful labia. The BJ she gave me was one of the most genuinely incompetent and lazy I ever had, and only getting in a 69 allowed me to enjoy the situation a little more (given I couldn't examine her ridiculous technique, sucking only the tip with a weird side positioning of the head).
When it was time for the main act I put her in doggy, which at least gave me a few minutes of enjoyment of her beautiful. slim and round, bottom. although that couldn't last long because she can't really take a pounding and after a while she was clearly in pain. A couple more positions, always with her sporting a look mid way between bored and borderline disgusted (this job is obviously not for her) and I came not too enthusiastically in the condom.
I tried some chit chat between rounds, but not only she didn't seem interested in discussing anything and mostly spent time uttering ignorant platitudes, she often reacted with evident irritation to my questions or attempts to keep the conversation going, so after a couple of lame attempts I cut it short.
With exactly zero attempts from her to act sexily or get me back in the mood, I didn't know what to do. So, after some more embarrassing small talk I went back to eating her pussy, but she was if possible even more lifeless than before so after a minute I called it a day and started packing. She was obviously completely oblivious of the kind of shitty experience she had brought me through, and seemed reasonably satisfied of her job. In the meantime I was thinking angrily of how I threw away 200 quid and how this kind of performance should cost no more than 80 quid an hour.
Overall:
location: 5
face: 7
body: 8.5
performance: 2
vfm: 3.5
Avoid.
