We were waiting at Hyde Park Corner to get on one of the tour buses, which for me was a bit of a waste of money as I've done it several times, but thought it would keep my mates entertained. It was now £30 for two days. Last time I went on one it was £16. I did negotiate a fiver off though.
More interestingly as we were waiting this woman approached coming up Park Lane. Blonde hair, probably dyed, maybe in her forties. She was dressed very strikingly, but I thought tartily in a skimpy leopard skin dress, and little else. My mates immediately lusted after her, but I didn't fancy her at all. As she approached us I could sense something weird was about to happen.
In very broken English she showed us her phone and asked for directions to what was on it, which turned out to be the Cumberland Hotel which was visible from where we were.
We tried to explain it was just over the road and pointed to it, but she didn't seem to understand and said, 'How I get across road? You show me.'
Being the one with the 'knowledge' I walked with her the few yards to the crossing. Obviously it was very busy. She kept repeating in poor English, 'How I cross road? You show me.' She appeared very distracted and even a little distressed. I asked her if it was her first time in London and after initially not appearing to understand replied, 'First time in this place.' She then wanted me to take her across the road, but at this point the tour bus arrived and my mates called me back, not that I was going to go across with her anyway.
It was only afterwards I thought maybe she was a prossy going to an appointment in the hotel, and maybe she was late hence her apparent distress. If she was staying in the hotel she had no luggage whatsoever, and very unusually, not even a handbag. However rather than dressed discreetly for a hotel appointment she was dressed like the most obvious of streetwalkers.
If she was a prossy with her agitated, distracted state and poor English I wouldn't have liked to have been the punter who'd booked her.
Whatever the situation was there are some very weird people in London.