Blackpool.
Ride the donkeys, build sun castles amongst donkey poo.
Take a tram ride, see the lights, tower just like that Ethel one in Paris.
Watch a show, fill up the Slot machines, participate in naked mud wrestling, eat green fish n chips.

Loads of pissed up Stag n hen dos.
Plenty of EE whores that don’t speak English.
Just like being abroad with Johnny Foreigner.
