So I'd written this one off previously as it had been reviewed by someone previously as offering absolutely no extras and while I like a challenge and the long game there is no point ploughing cash into a non-starter.
Anyway recently I spotted an updated ad that mentioned that the lady was pregnant. I thought this was odd given the assertion that it was fully legit. So I exchanged a few messages and in the end thought I'd give it a shot.
The result was a not unenjoyable but slightly surreal massage experience.
The Ad: External Link/Members OnlyPrice: 45 for 1 hour massage
Comms: All done by text and somewhat slow at times in responding. I did ask early on if happy ending was available and told no, however rather than that put me off I tried a different tack firstly as to whether the massage was covered to which I was told no, the massage was uncovered at all times. So I then asked if I'd be allowed to relieve myself at the end, and the response was yes that would be fine. Just for clarity I asked if the lady would be present during that and was told yes if that was what I wanted. I booked an appointment for 2 days later.
Location: Having been given clear instructions by text on the location and where to park, I managed to find some on road parking although it's very busy round there so be warned. The flat is tucked away in a cul-de-sac with buzzer entry. It's a second floor flat in a 70s block of social housing flats. After being buzzed in I went up to the flat door and pressed the doorbell, immediately regretting it as the doorbell was so loud I announced my arrival to the entire block! The door was opened by a skinny bald Indian guy probably in his mid 40s who showed me through into a small room with a massage table in the middle. I was told to take a seat and the lady would be with me shortly.
The room was grubby, the floor tiles were covered in paint and the place felt like it needed a thorough clean. But the thing that stood out was it was clearly decorated by a blind man high on crystal meth! There was this random mix of stuff you'd find in the skip at the end of a car boot sale, which I can only assume was trying to give it a bohemian feel but only if the bohemian had no aesthetic taste! It had to seen to be truly believed but a full size glitter ball, a multi-coloured glass chandelier, Christmas decorations and Spiderman curtains will hopefully give you a feel for the place.
On top of all this there was the sound of a screaming child to add the ambiance.
The Girl: To say I was having second thoughts is an understatement, but then in walked Angel. She's a petite Indian girl, maybe late twenties to early 30s, reasonable pretty. She was wearing a flowing grey dress and looked well presented. She was friendly enough and I thought sod it, I've been in worse punting venues.
The Service: Angel told me to take off my clothes and get on the bed, which I did. It was only later I realised that the curtains were wide open and people in the houses opposite could see me in all my glory. Once on the bed I was ask if I wanted soft or medium massage and went for medium. She proceeded with a fairly gentle massage which turned out to be very relaxing and I felt myself nod off a couple of times. When she started on my bum and upper thigh, while I'd say she was avoiding any ball strokes or cc swipes she did a few accidental ones and it was sensual enough to have me nice and hard.
Back done I was asked to flip over and she started on my chest and then moved down my body. She didn't touch my cock but she brushed my balls enough times that it was clear I was aroused. At this point I think I had reached the conclusion that she wasn't going to offer any more and was going to ask if it was ok for me to wank. But she took the initiative and said if I wanted to play with myself I could and she would get me some tissues. So while she massaged my inner thighs I wanked off which was surprisingly satisfying.
Once I popped she helped me clean up and little and offered me a towel to clean myself down which was quite cold and damp but there was no way I was paying extra for the shower!
Anyway I dressed paid my money and left.
Conclusion: It was certainly one to chalk up to experience. The massage was well worth the money and if she offered extras there'd be a queue. But sadly it seems it was self service only and the grubby random location push this down into a neutral.
Would I go again? Only if she was offering extras, but without those it's a one time only experience for me.