External Link/Members OnlyAnother turd from Diva Escort, that I originally thought might be a good agency after having a (short) string of good experiences with them. The last few attempts have been disastrous, and I'm starting to think that in the current price regime anything under 250£ is bound to be shitty, and anything at that price or above is still likely to be shitty.
Before reading this review read
this one left yesterday, which echoes mine in various aspects.
As that review says, Olya receives in a ground floor flat in West Brompton. The flat itself is quite nice (and the entrance is particularly discreet), and I've had a couple of
good to
great experiences in there in the past.
One of the problems with Olya is that she receives in a shitty second bedroom which feels like a small storage room with a squeaky single bed placed against the wall. The thing contributes to the air of general sloppiness that she conveys, with her somewhat unkempt looks and the attitude, which I found vaguely brash and vulgar.
I was a few minutes late, but she wasn't fazed (particularly because I'm sure she would have ejected me on the hour if I hadn't left by my own accord anyway). She is a tall girl, absolutely not resembling any of the pictures on either her Diva or her
External Link/Members Only account. I'm not sure if it's a blatant case of bait and switch or just wild photoshopping, but at least her "selfies" do not resemble her in any way (if it's her it must be her 10 years and 10 layers of make-up ago). The photoshopped images she added recently obviously depict a completely different person, and the ones that she had before, while somewhat vaguely representing someone with a similar structure, would not be recognised by her mother. I think she does that on purpose: while talking, she told me she didn't want to use AW because her best friend is a punter and doesn't know she's a whore. I asked if she wasn't concerned he would find her on the agency website and she answered "absolutely not". Of course, the pictures are not hers...
Anyway, looks wise I would say she is a reasonably attractive woman, in her late twenties or early twenties (forget the 24 on the Diva website and the even more ludicrous 23 on Top Secret), with a tired look and a body that, while still in reasonable shape because she's a tall woman, is starting to get too heavy for my taste. Size-wise she's between 8 and 10, with small breasts and a big butt (for lovers of the genre... I'm surely not) and some cellulitis on her long thighs. I would say both body and face-wise she's a 7 (some make-up would probably go a long way, but I don't expect the lazy tart to make the minimum effort for you).
I took a shower, which added to me being late made it so that I got back into the room at probably 12 past the hour. For some reason, the 12 minutes hadn't been enough for her to perform some maintenance tasks that she deemed indispensable: she said her lamp was broken and she tried to get a replacement that was also broken. She fiddled for minutes with her phone to find the right soundtrack (finally settling on something deeply shitty). She tried to block the door in a position that would let some light filtering from the living room. Finally, she looked at me as if she were a psychologist trying to diagnose a mental illness and asked me "so, what do you like?", while sitting prudently at a meter from me.
I was somewhat annoyed by the time wasting, so I cut the pleasantries and started undressing her and caressing her. I kissed her a couple of times, and she obliged half-heartedly but I could sense that she wasn't too much up for it so I didn't insist. I went down on her, and thought that she wasn't reactive enough. She acted somewhat languidly, with a general attitude that went on throughout the punt. After a while I got on the bed to get a BJ and she immediately reached for a condom. When I asked about the possibility for OWO she scolded me saying it's bad for me and giving me a somewhat outraged look. You can imagine how arousing I was finding all of this.
I tried to relax, but her BJ was barely perceivable beneath the thick latex layer. So I moved to a 69, and got her pussy in my mouth again, thinking that her whole pelvis area felt really too big for my taste. After a generally uninspiring experience I moved to penetration, immediately thinking that she was too loose, getting annoyed by the squeaky bed, and by her constant teasing me because I was sweating (she soon said that it was "disgusting", which contributed to making me feel in a great mood, obviously).
It took some effort, but I managed to come, and the whole thing felt like being at a butcher and choosing some cuts of meat. Chit chat was particularly annoying, because she is honestly one of the less interesting or charming girls I've met in this hobby, so I thought about getting to a second round. She kind of laughed at the idea as if that was a novelty, but she didn't object (after sending me to take another shower, fair enough). When I got down to it, though, I soon thought that there was no point: I didn't find her attractive enough, she was too loose and too meaty, and there was no chance at all I would come again. So I cut it short and left.
Overall, physical construction aside, the performance felt uninspiring and generally disappointing. She felt sloppy and lazy all the time, she was vaguely passive-aggressive in her tone, plainly passive when fucking, and completely dull both humanly and sexually.
Not recommended.
