Most bizarre punting experience?

[Highlander]

Anybody else had a really weird punt?

My two cents.  - I had a strange experience a couple of months ago where I went to see a EE girl from Adultwork in the Sunderland quayside area.  I turned up and she looked nothing like her pics.  I could tell there was another girl in the flat but she swore blind she was the one that I had booked and not the other.  At least I think that's what she was saying as she didn't really speak english.   

At this point I should have walked but for some reason didn't (she wasn't bad looking I guess).  Thankfully fate intervened as she didn't like the look of my pristine, fresh from the mint looking notes that I had just withdrawn from a nearby machine.  She took my money off me and went into another room to speak to the other girl (worlds foremost expert on currency) and 5 mins of presumably Romanian chatter followed.   

She came back and told me my money was no good.  This is strange I thought, first time I have encountered an escort who doesn't like money.  Then I started to freak out and thought this could be some sort of EE mafia scam where they swapped my notes for counterfeit notes.  I accused her of this, she got a bit agitated and told me I had to leave.

  Really freaked out at this point.  I was now convinced they had done a number on me and needed to get rid of these notes quick.  I immediately went into 5 different shops buying something daft like chewing gum or crisps just to get rid of the notes.

WTF! I will never see another foreign escort.

Anything like this or similarly weird ever happen to anyone?

[The President]

 

paranoia?

next time crumple them up and mark them before handing over 

[LostInMackemLand]

Name and shame ?

[CBPaul]

Not all EE girls do that so I wouldn't rule them all out based on one experience.

It is weird though. I've seen a few who have checked the notes quite closely so I guess they have been handed duds in the past, never been refused though.

As the poster above says, name and shame.

[Spartacus123]

Had  the old bill knock down the door of the flat I was in - this was  just as I was reaching the point of no return with the help of some seriously good OWO. Luckily there was no other girls in the flat (she had gone out for an outcall!). After they left we carried on

[myothernameis]

Anybody else had a really weird punt?

 

She took my money off me and went into another room to speak to the other girl (worlds foremost expert on currency) and 5 mins of presumably Romanian chatter followed.   

She came back and told me my money was no good.  This is strange I thought, first time I have encountered an escort who doesn't like money.  Then I started to freak out and thought this could be some sort of EE mafia scam where they swapped my notes for counterfeit notes.  I accused her of this, she got a bit agitated and told me I had to leave.

Anything like this or similarly weird ever happen to anyone?

Why not just go to the police, it shouldn't matter to them if your punting, what should matter, are these EE escorts trying to pass of fake notes

Now even though you didnt go, you passed them off, your just as bad as them, infact you might even find your self in trouble, even though you think you have got away with it

I work in  supermarket, and one day I thought some guy had passed me a fake note, so I took note what he looked like, then got the note checked...it was fake, my report was sent to the police, and they looked for possible suspects, they didn't get any, but a few weeks later, he was back, but this time he was recognized, and arrested

[vorian]

Why not just go to the police, it shouldn't matter to them if your punting, what should matter, are these EE escorts trying to pass of fake notes

Now even though you didnt go, you passed them off, your just as bad as them, infact you might even find your self in trouble, even though you think you have got away with it

I work in  supermarket, and one day I thought some guy had passed me a fake note, so I took note what he looked like, then got the note checked...it was fake, my report was sent to the police, and they looked for possible suspects, they didn't get any, but a few weeks later, he was back, but this time he was recognized, and arrested

Maybe I'm wrong I read it as he said he thought they might have been changed by the prossie for fake notes not that they were fake notes.

[MidlandsEscortxo]

Anybody else had a really weird punt?

My two cents.  - I had a strange experience a couple of months ago where I went to see a EE girl from Adultwork in the Sunderland quayside area.  I turned up and she looked nothing like her pics.  I could tell there was another girl in the flat but she swore blind she was the one that I had booked and not the other.  At least I think that's what she was saying as she didn't really speak english.   

At this point I should have walked but for some reason didn't (she wasn't bad looking I guess).  Thankfully fate intervened as she didn't like the look of my pristine, fresh from the mint looking notes that I had just withdrawn from a nearby machine.  She took my money off me and went into another room to speak to the other girl (worlds foremost expert on currency) and 5 mins of presumably Romanian chatter followed.   

She came back and told me my money was no good.  This is strange I thought, first time I have encountered an escort who doesn't like money.  Then I started to freak out and thought this could be some sort of EE mafia scam where they swapped my notes for counterfeit notes.  I accused her of this, she got a bit agitated and told me I had to leave.

  Really freaked out at this point.  I was now convinced they had done a number on me and needed to get rid of these notes quick.  I immediately went into 5 different shops buying something daft like chewing gum or crisps just to get rid of the notes.

WTF! I will never see another foreign escort.

Anything like this or similarly weird ever happen to anyone?

Most girls would usually have a UV scanner and just take it out the room and check then. I find it rude to count/check money in front of a person so I just take it out of the room and do it while client is getting ready for the booking. I LOVE fresh notes anyway, so dont see what the fuss was :/

[SirFrank]

Not money but I had a surreal experience in the late 90s. Was on a stag do in Belgium and after a day of heavy drinking a few of us ended up in a knocking shop. The 2 lads I went in with had gone to rooms with their ladies so I was in the main room on my own waiting to see the menu. I remember speaking to presumably the Madame when a dwarf (is that the right term these days?) sat on the arm of the chair and started playing with my hair. I remember her saying sexy man and suggested we went off to fuck.

I was shit faced and I swear someone spiked my drink but it's so vivid it must be true. I didn't nob her; really not my thing but I've often wondered if it really happened. I wandered off in the end without seeing anyone and spewed my guts up on the way back to the hotel. felt like I'd been run over the next day. The 2 lads ribbed me and said they didn't see this woman in there but she was playing with my face at one point and talking dirty to me.  I couldn't have been tripping. I'm sure of it. Anyway if it happened that's my most bizarre punting experience. If it didn't happen then I'm a complete cunt. If it helps you decide one way or the other I dreamt that papa smurf tried to kill me in the early hours but that was definitely a dream. God I was glad to get home from that trip. Took me a week to start feeling normal

[willie loman]

Had the police knocking on the door, but as they got no reply, they just left a note, about an unpaid fine, once had the stepmother shout through the letter box, the girl whispered, " I cant open the door"

[smiths]

I was at a party a few years ago and an Asian guy turned up, as we all got naked ready for action he took his outdoor clothes off and put a pair of pygamas and slippers on. During the whole party only the slippers came off. I tried to chat to him in the break but he was clearly a mentalist.

I was on my way to a party that was held in the basement of a glass warehouse on an industrial estate, as i walked towards the party unit the guys in the unit directly opposite started shouting give her one for me, i did my best to do so.

I was at Club Lick that was in Hoe Street in Walthamstow which gave me my first chuckle. Once inside it was clear the place was a health and safety nightmare. There were nails and tacks sticking up from the floor in places. Luckily i had brought my own condoms as it turned out they were £1 each behind the bar, the tight prick who run it was then too mean to provide free condoms.

I went to the toilet for a piss to be confronted by a floor over flowing with others piss, i pissed in a sink in the end upstairs. This club had a loft area that was accessed by a very ropy looking ladder that was totally vertical, i saw two guys fall but managed to safely scramble up to the loft to find it was boiling hot. Despite this heat a WG was fully clothed, i said to her whats the point in that, she said she was shy, i said well you have chosen the wrong thing to do with being a WG then.

They had a play booth which apart from  being too small was hot and sweaty. This is where i first saw the horrific Katie Weale, she was literally slapping punters hands off her. I watched her finally squirrel herself away with one punter sucking his very limp cock with a condom and continuing to slap any other punter that came near her. I mentioned this to the host and he was counting a big pile of cash saying its happy days. As i learned he was too thick to converse with.

A disabled punter turned up halfway through with another guy who said he was his carer, i helped carry this big guy up two flights of stairs, nice bloke but i didnt see any WG go near him. I got very lucky with a WG named Summer who used to run her own parties before being done, she couldnt get enough spunk down her neck, i was out and she was literally screaming for more. That was a bizarre punt.

[NIK]

Had plenty of bizarre experiences.
Too fucking many!

[Roland D Hay]

Had plenty of bizarre experiences.
Too fucking many!

Fuck me Nik, that's too much detail, you should write a book...

[NIK]

Fuck me Nik, that's too much detail, you should write a book...

 

There's a long chapter devoted to them!

[Metal Geek]

Not bizarre so much but I was ripped off by a Romanian girl on a punt while I was on business in London last year. I'd seen her before and the first time was an excellent punt, but she was clearly stoned the second time I saw her, and when it came to handing over the money I'd made sure I had the exact notes folded - but when she counted them it was 20 short. At the time I gave her the benefit of the doubt and handed over another 20 - in hind sight this was probably a really stupid thing to do, as I had to get it out of my wallet and having seen how much cash I had, who knows what could have happened - but I was too horny at the time to be thinking straight.

[TheDoctor]

Not particularly bizarre but I had a booking with a Brazilian girl once and between round 1 and round 2 to fill time she showed me pictures of her friends on her phone. I pointed to one pic of a spectacular girl and said I'd love to fuck her (in an inoffensive jokey way). Immediately the girl called her friend and arranged for me to meet her. We met up and fucked for the same price as the first girl. And no, she wasn't an escort, but was thinking about doing it.

Never did see any profiles of her so clearly I scarred her for lie.

[wristjob]

Booked a girl for an incall and she was clearly keen for me to finish round 1. Soon as i did she ran to the loo and started coughing up blood. I called the agency and they sent a girl round to look after her. I think this had happened before so not my doing. Anyway there wasn't a round 2.

Got a a punt once, called the number and got a guy giving it the "yeah, who are you" reply. Load of shite cos I'd been to the flat before and the pimp was a total dick.

Booked a girl for my birthday a few years back. A couple of days before. I got a call from her dad - she'd been rushed to hospital with gono, they'd found out she was on the game and were calling recent contacts to warn them. He phoned me back a bit later too an I was like "yeah, you already called me".

Went to see 1 girl. Finished with her and asked to go to the bathroom - where her mate was hiding.

[fenderswoop]

Went to see 1 girl. Finished with her and asked to go to the bathroom - where her mate was hiding.

I've had that. 2 girls sharing a studio apartment so only one room and a bathroom off it. went to use the loo after round one was finished and the other girl was in there sitting on the edge of the bath reading a magazine.

[Corus Boy]

Had a girl who arrived late as her dad got lost driving her to mine while looking for a chemists for condoms!

She then told me that she had just been visiting her boyfriend in prison outside Bridgend and was scared to carry any condoms with her during the prison visit and she wouldn't be able to "overstay" as her dad was waiting for her in a local pub.

She was good in bed though and now long retired.

[CBPaul]

I've had that. 2 girls sharing a studio apartment so only one room and a bathroom off it. went to use the loo after round one was finished and the other girl was in there sitting on the edge of the bath reading a magazine.

Me too. 2 girls haring a hotel room and one hid in the bog for 30 minutes. Could hear her phone going and her taking a piss. When she reappeared as I was getting dressed the fog that descended into the room was unbearable, she'd been chain smoking in there. At least other have left the hotel when room sharing. 

[the_exile]

Not particularly bizarre but I had a booking with a Brazilian girl once and between round 1 and round 2 to fill time she showed me pictures of her friends on her phone. I pointed to one pic of a spectacular girl and said I'd love to fuck her (in an inoffensive jokey way). Immediately the girl called her friend and arranged for me to meet her. We met up and fucked for the same price as the first girl. And no, she wasn't an escort, but was thinking about doing it.

Oh I dunno, that sounded pretty bizarre - in a good way - to me! Sometimes girls are quite protective of their business so it was nice of her to let you give her friend a try.

Nearest thing I can think of to that which happened to me was after seeing a girl at a local flat, when she said she thought I might like to know that another girl I liked seeing but who hadn't worked for some time would be back again & working the next day. I thought that was kind of her - of course I was back the next day and had a great time with girl two.

[galinsoga]

In Shanghai.
Used Craig's List to find one to come to the hotel because I was too tired to go walk-about.  Nice one came and we had a great time - so much so I asked for her phone number to re-book direct other days rather than her have to pay the fee to the agency guy (who incidentally spoke perfect English)

Worked fine - she came another day

However, on yet another day no reply to my several texts so I contacted her agency and asked for another. The other arrived ok.  Not as good a looker as the first but shaggable.  I was JUST starting getting going with her when the first girl turned up at my hotel room door.  Oh bugger!  What do you do?

The first girl offered to wait in the bathroom until I had "finished" but no way I could do that so I paid off the second girl without finishing - guess she was happy to get the full fee (not a lot) for very little time spent - and then spent the whole night with the first one.   Good girl she was.  I kept in touch with her for a year afterwards until she went back home to Harbin. 

Galli

[joshwinkers]

Back in the 90s when I first started punting I stupidly got drunk first once, and half way through the punt I realised I needed a piss or I'd never cum. Anyway, the girl told me where the loo was, I headed off, and it was only half way through urinating that I wondered why there was no noise. It was at that point I realised I'd not taken the condom off, and had accidentally made a piss filled water balloon, as it were. 

[ALyons]

Great stories 

[Anallover6969]

My "Friend" cough, cough, had a RB from a WG in Basingstoke. Link to this Profile Page using External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only

This happend to a "friend" and wasn't me at all. Cough Cough.

The punt it's self was pretty good OWO was OK ish but blimy, she took it up the arse like a trooper!

Anyhoo, got the usual details but said don't bother knocking just open door and she'll be upstairs waiting. The block of houses just ended at number 5. Where the fuck was No6? Scouted round and saw some new builds round the corner, next house must be number 6 right?.

Went in, it was all dark. I (er my friend) rembers walking up the stairs thinking something aint right here but the general had taken over well before then.

One of the bedroom doors was closed. This must be it.

knocked on the door and said "hello?"
Which was met by woman responding, "Hay, who are you looking for?"
I replied "Gena?"
And she calmly replied "youve got the wrong house"
So apologised profusely and legged it faster than Eamonn Holmes at a free buffet!

Thinking about it. She was so calm it couldn't have been the 1st time it happend.

[mystery7]

My most bizarre experience was when one let me in on time, offered all services advertised and treated me like a human being. Most bizarre

[kink]

I had arranged for a girl to come over to my hotel in a rural location. She phoned the hotel reception for directions on more than one occasion for directions as her girlfriend driver was lost. They eventually arrived, driver parked up in the hotel car park and stayed in the car.  The escort walked into the hotel, dressed in black minidress which barely covered her arse, came upstairs to my room.

We had a shower and got on with our date, got a knock on the door and it was the police who had apparently been called by the hotel. The driver was asked if her friend was a prostitute, she calmly advised them that she was having an affair. Police came to the room to check out the story with us and we explained that we were friends. They left it at that!

We got undressed again and resumed the date. Girl was dirty no-holes-barred prossi and had a great 2 hours with her. Got dressed and walked her down to reception and kissed her goodbye!

[vorian]

I had arranged for a girl to come over to my hotel in a rural location. She phoned the hotel reception for directions on more than one occasion for directions as her girlfriend driver was lost. They eventually arrived, driver parked up in the hotel car park and stayed in the car.  The escort walked into the hotel, dressed in black minidress which barely covered her arse, came upstairs to my room.

We had a shower and got on with our date, got a knock on the door and it was the police who had apparently been called by the hotel. The driver was asked if her friend was a prostitute, she calmly advised them that she was having an affair. Police came to the room to check out the story with us and we explained that we were friends. They left it at that!

We got undressed again and resumed the date. Girl was dirty no-holes-barred prossi and had a great 2 hours with her. Got dressed and walked her down to reception and kissed her goodbye!

Sound like a big waste of police time, so what if she was a prossie nothing illegal was taking place. If Hotels called the police every time they had a WG staying they might as well have a full time PCSO based in reception.

[overhead]

I've had that. 2 girls sharing a studio apartment so only one room and a bathroom off it. went to use the loo after round one was finished and the other girl was in there sitting on the edge of the bath reading a magazine.

I've had better than that. The other girl stayed in the room and watched.

[vorian]

I've had better than that. The other girl stayed in the room and watched.

Did that cost extra 

[overhead]

but I was too horny at the time to be thinking straight.

How could that be?

I'm always the most considered and rational I ever am when I'm in that condition.

[overhead]

Did that cost extra 

No it didn't. It was the first time I realised that some girls like watching sex. It might have been that she was learning the job. She was quite young, but they told me they simply shared the room and that the other girl wasn't a WG. They looked like sisters in fact.

[vorian]

No it didn't. It was the first time I realised that some girls like watching sex. It might have been that she was learning the job. She was quite young, but they told me they simply shared the room and that the other girl wasn't a WG. They looked like sisters in fact.

 

[timmyshorny]

Not money but I had a surreal experience in the late 90s. Was on a stag do in Belgium and after a day of heavy drinking a few of us ended up in a knocking shop. The 2 lads I went in with had gone to rooms with their ladies so I was in the main room on my own waiting to see the menu. I remember speaking to presumably the Madame when a dwarf (is that the right term these days?) sat on the arm of the chair and started playing with my hair. I remember her saying sexy man and suggested we went off to fuck.

I was shit faced and I swear someone spiked my drink but it's so vivid it must be true. I didn't nob her; really not my thing but I've often wondered if it really happened. I wandered off in the end without seeing anyone and spewed my guts up on the way back to the hotel. felt like I'd been run over the next day. The 2 lads ribbed me and said they didn't see this woman in there but she was playing with my face at one point and talking dirty to me.  I couldn't have been tripping. I'm sure of it. Anyway if it happened that's my most bizarre punting experience. If it didn't happen then I'm a complete cunt. If it helps you decide one way or the other I dreamt that papa smurf tried to kill me in the early hours but that was definitely a dream. God I was glad to get home from that trip. Took me a week to start feeling normal

that is probably the funniest thing I have ever read!

[webpunter]

Many moons ago on a trip to Marbella / PB
At the Navy bar & it was getting late - so the girlies were looking for their last client
Discounting was available down from €250/hr to €150
I was too wrecked to negotiate any more & she was a really hot russian babe
Agreed the deal & walked outside
Decided i needed to go to the bogs as 'the turtle was poking its head out'
Mentioned this & said i'd go back inside & be out like a couple of mins
She must have thought i was going to change my mind so she said that i could use her loo in her flat
I said its no probs - it'll be a couple of mins tops & i'm deffo coming straight back out
She was having none of it & took me by the hand & led me up the road to her apartment a couple of hundred metres away
I was expecting at least a 1 - 2 bedder and a separate bog
But no its a studio with the world's smallest small room
No window & the smallest extractor fan in the world
You can all guess what's going to happen next
>
>
Turned on the extractor fan & the only thing this did was make a little noise, but not enough !
After a few days drinking beer, vodka red bulls & eating rich food i was begiining to get worried
There wasn't even a proper door
It was one of the fold up jobbies
I searched round for some air-freshener - waste of time
In my drunken state i am then trying to figure out how to curl one out quietly
No chance - it sounded like a heavy machine gun going off
The toilet was one of those strange foreign ones [not unexpected in spain] with a sloping back wall [about 30-40 degrees]
'It' flopped onto the back wall & then slowly slid into the water - like the Bismark going down
Time for number 1 flush.  I was concerned about blocking the whole thing up
One more flush & i then had to ready myself
I then got the statement 'are you ok'
I'm thinking to myself much better thank-you, but not your toliet
Washed my now slightly sweaty face & emerged
Tried to pull the sliding door back & it got stuck

She's looking at me & has a face which says 'WTF ?'
She then said something similar & that i owed her €150
To which i replied - what for - i haven't done anything [apart from go to the loo]
I got out €10 from a back pocket & sheepishly offered this & said i was leaving & sorry
I was so desperate for a tom-tit that €10 seemed a bargain at the time

Had a few choice words in Russian shouted at me
I said really sorry but i did tell you outside the Navy bar - twice
I smiled suggested €150 + the €10 [as an apology] and this seemed to do the trick
Think i emerged about 45 mins later - which by all a/c's is good
The time in the middle was a bit of a blur - but being a good few pounds lighter i had a bit of a 'hop, skip & a jump' in me - i sobered up enough - just
She started the clock when we entered the apartment - which given the events i considered ok
Plus i had shot my load & was just desperate for sleep

The apartment block was like a rabbit warren & did i pay any attention on the way in ?  Did i fuck !
I was more interested in looking at the ruskie babe in her tight dress - she was fab
Took me 5 mins to find a way out and that meant jumping over a high gate
With the guys in the morning at the accomo, a 'kangaroo court' was organized - the usual over a late breakfast
They were pissing themselves

All rather predictable story after the 1st few lines me thinks - but it made me smile posting this

[DaveMugabe]

Blimey hope the turtle was okay

[tazz]

Several years ago i used to see Paige of Les Girls in Soho. Turned out she lived in my part of london and i had lived in her part of Nottingham. In fact her mum lived in the same road a women i knew at university had lived in. What a small world.

[tazz]

Just had the most bizzare punting experience ever, went to see an Essex girl, as soon as i saw her was shocked as shes the spitting image of a married women i worked with front Kent who i wanted to fuck and who had the hots for me. Also personality and age was very similar. Has to go down as 1 in a million event. Told her this, dont think shed ever had a guy say this.

[iloverachelv]

I had the whole 2 girl in one flat.

One was in the toilet.

I went in, handed over the cash, heard a noise in the toilet.  I asked who it was, half expecting it to be a man.

Her friend came out and they explained in broken English that she wasnt well, she did offer to leave but she did look grim.

We carried on the the room but once id finished the girl id just had left for the bathroom and the other girl returned to the bedroom.

I had only just taken the condom off as she was walking passed me and because there was very little room she brushed my cock with her legs/buttom.  I could actually see some of my cum on her when she sat down.

The girl who I had fucked got none on her, the girl who I hadnt got some.  Thats in own of my reviews too.  The cum girl was also listening to horrific music in the bathroom that made me think of the borat theme tune.

[Hertsgent]

Many moons ago on a trip to Marbella / PB
At the Navy bar & it was getting late - so the girlies were looking for their last client
Discounting was available down from €250/hr to €150
I was too wrecked to negotiate any more & she was a really hot russian babe
Agreed the deal & walked outside
Decided i needed to go to the bogs as 'the turtle was poking its head out'
Mentioned this & said i'd go back inside & be out like a couple of mins
She must have thought i was going to change my mind so she said that i could use her loo in her flat
I said its no probs - it'll be a couple of mins tops & i'm deffo coming straight back out
She was having none of it & took me by the hand & led me up the road to her apartment a couple of hundred metres away
I was expecting at least a 1 - 2 bedder and a separate bog
But no its a studio with the world's smallest small room
No window & the smallest extractor fan in the world
You can all guess what's going to happen next
>
>
Turned on the extractor fan & the only thing this did was make a little noise, but not enough !
After a few days drinking beer, vodka red bulls & eating rich food i was begiining to get worried
There wasn't even a proper door
It was one of the fold up jobbies
I searched round for some air-freshener - waste of time
In my drunken state i am then trying to figure out how to curl one out quietly
No chance - it sounded like a heavy machine gun going off
The toilet was one of those strange foreign ones [not unexpected in spain] with a sloping back wall [about 30-40 degrees]
'It' flopped onto the back wall & then slowly slid into the water - like the Bismark going down
Time for number 1 flush.  I was concerned about blocking the whole thing up
One more flush & i then had to ready myself
I then got the statement 'are you ok'
I'm thinking to myself much better thank-you, but not your toliet
Washed my now slightly sweaty face & emerged
Tried to pull the sliding door back & it got stuck

She's looking at me & has a face which says 'WTF ?'
She then said something similar & that i owed her €150
To which i replied - what for - i haven't done anything [apart from go to the loo]
I got out €10 from a back pocket & sheepishly offered this & said i was leaving & sorry
I was so desperate for a tom-tit that €10 seemed a bargain at the time

Had a few choice words in Russian shouted at me
I said really sorry but i did tell you outside the Navy bar - twice
I smiled suggested €150 + the €10 [as an apology] and this seemed to do the trick
Think i emerged about 45 mins later - which by all a/c's is good
The time in the middle was a bit of a blur - but being a good few pounds lighter i had a bit of a 'hop, skip & a jump' in me - i sobered up enough - just
She started the clock when we entered the apartment - which given the events i considered ok
Plus i had shot my load & was just desperate for sleep

The apartment block was like a rabbit warren & did i pay any attention on the way in ?  Did i fuck !
I was more interested in looking at the ruskie babe in her tight dress - she was fab
Took me 5 mins to find a way out and that meant jumping over a high gate
With the guys in the morning at the accomo, a 'kangaroo court' was organized - the usual over a late breakfast
They were pissing themselves

All rather predictable story after the 1st few lines me thinks - but it made me smile posting this

I know this is an old thread, but this story had me in stitches - explains why you should never take a shit in a WGs flat! On one occasion I was desperately looking for the traps in London pre-punt.....made a bit of mess at Pret-a-manger ....

Just to contribute a little more, I've had the two girls in the hotel room several times (knowingly) - always Romanian. Once she stayed in the bathroom, after explaining to me the girl "allocated" to me spoke no English (she was a good session mind you, just let me do anything I wanted). Another time, the second girl sat on the side of the bed watching porn (I quite enjoyed that one too). And finally, another occasion got offered the threesome. Was a small problem in that I only had a bit of surplus cash on me, but once that was clear....she took what I had and off we went. Ok experience, not exactly stunners on that occasion, and my brain went into overdrive with the threesome thing

Most scary experience? Confronted by a bloke (who owned the house - builder type working on it) while walking up to the property....saved by the lady opening the door. Crap shag too, and likely both pikeys in on it together. Having parked my car round the corner (out of sight), she wanted a lift to town centre (she only used flat for clients) - which I did (stupidly of course, given it gives away the plate). Worried for a while after that that I would be controlled by pikeys, but actually nothing happened. Am a bit more cautious now on visit locations.....

[shagbambi]

I booked an incall.  Arrived and heard voices.  Was assured they were female only.  Was then asked if I fancied a foursome for the same price...

So I said yes.  Four hours later (I paid for an hour), I staggered out of the appartment, having enjoyed all three girls, all in their mid-twenties and various combinations there of.  They bought me dinner, plied me with drinks.  It was bizarre as it was totally unexpected, as was their hospitality.  A great and unforgetable evening.

[MrMatrix]

SirFrank and Webpunter. They are 2 of the funniest stories I've heard. Still laughing 

[tazz]

I booked an incall.  Arrived and heard voices.  Was assured they were female only.  Was then asked if I fancied a foursome for the same price...

So I said yes.  Four hours later (I paid for an hour), I staggered out of the appartment, having enjoyed all three girls, all in their mid-twenties and various combinations there of.  They bought me dinner, plied me with drinks.  It was bizarre as it was totally unexpected, as was their hospitality.  A great and unforgetable evening.

So you paid for an hour with 3 girls and got 4 instead? Are you famous or a stud? Ive heard of 2 for 1 offers but this gives it a whole new meaning.

[two20]

The sooner they start taking bitcoins the better, perfect currency for a bit of subterfuge.

[shagbambi]

Neither a stud nor famous.  Just got lucky.

[tazz]

Since when have prossies starting giving free sex for 3 hours. What no other punters calling them, did you ask why they were doing this, seems very odd.

[shagbambi]

2hrs sex, 2hrs dinner/drinking/talking shit.  No interruptions (other punters).  Why were they not taking on other business?  No idea, but was I complaining?

Like I say it was bizzare as it flys in the face of punter logic.

[Demistify]

One sunday afternoon, I couldn't find anyone who was answering. I ended up with a much older woman with literally 4000+ positive reviews on Adultwork.

When I got in hers there was a nauseating smell. She told me, in a voice and accent like Catherine Tate's nan, "The fucking cat's just shit everywhere."

She then spent 10-15 minutes telling me about her political activities in the BNP, while I sat there, naked and confused.

In fairness, her services were good, and she took a throatfucking. I had to do something to try and make myself cum.

As I somehow worked up to cumming on her face (while I closed my eyes) she said 'Cum for your Mama'.

I have never lost wood as quick in my life.

[yumyum3]

One sunday afternoon, I couldn't find anyone who was answering. I ended up with a much older woman with literally 4000+ positive reviews on Adultwork.

When I got in hers there was a nauseating smell. She told me, in a voice and accent like Catherine Tate's nan, "The fucking cat's just shit everywhere."

She then spent 10-15 minutes telling me about her political activities in the BNP, while I sat there, naked and confused.

In fairness, her services were good, and she took a throatfucking. I had to do something to try and make myself cum.

As I somehow worked up to cumming on her face (while I closed my eyes) she said 'Cum for your Mama'.

I have never lost wood as quick in my life.

knees up muvver braaan, knees up muvver braaan ...

[Sonny Crockett]

I had a punt with a Thai lady in 2012, and as she was giving me massage, she started talking about serial killers and Thai Torture Techniques. She even did an imaginary demonstration of one of the techniques. Bloody Hell!!!