I guess a lot of guys must have this problem from time to time, but I had a particularly awkward outing with the family a little while ago. We had tickets to a West End theatre show for the whole family for a treat. Arrived early for a meal, and they wanted a wander around to see Chinatown. Uh-oh, I thought, going to need to seem less familiar with this than I actually am... It started with introducing the kids to Chinatown, during which we walked past all the happy-ending joints on Shaftesbury avenue ("See how there are all these Chinese shops and businesses", says the wife to the kids, pointing out "Be Health", where I've done my bit to support the local economy), passing by Nicky at 18 Newport Court so they could look at the lucky cats and silk jackets next door, and ending up walking along Greek Street (stopping at the Japanese kitchen knife shop next to the entrance to no. 8) and eventually Romilly Street (where my wife said, pricelessly, "You could pop in there for a quick one", pointing at the barber shop next to the entrance to no. 34. I was in need of a trim). Jesus, I needed that pint when we finally got into the theatre!