I met Sophie around a week ago. Fairly fed up with the options in Portsmouth I fancied a drive out to Bognor Regis. Shouldn't have bothered. I was hoping for a solid Thai punt. Simple, but enthusiastic. Much like amazing Phoebe in Portsmouth used to deliver.
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External Link/Members OnlyThis was a 30 minute incall, £60. I texted and asked if she was available and received a reply almost straight away confirming availability and and that services would include massage, kissing, oral and sex. I texted back to confirm French kissing and she agreed. Pretty much what I was looking for so agreed and headed over. Post code given.
I arrived at the agreed time and texted for full address. She gave me the name of a house in the main road, easy to find but neglected to give me a flat number. So, there I am hovering outside the house waiting for her to give me a clue. Eventually she texts back and tells me the buzzer is broken and she will come out. Not the most discreet start. Anyway, she does come to the door eventually, phone stuck to her ear chatting to someone, and ushers me in to a ground floor flat. Finished her conversation and asks me how long. That is the extent to her English knowledge. I said 30 minutes. May as well have said 'I'll take two elephants please'. No idea. Handed £60 over and she understood that.
Looks wise, she was probably the girl in the pictures. Less attractive and I would say frumpy. Mid 30s. Generally disappointed.
Indicated I should lay on the bed (clean towel placed over it). I stripped off and lay down. She stripped down and joined me, starting what can only be described as beating the crap out of my back. I'm pretty sure it was meant to be a massage. By now I was just thinking she has no idea. No conversation (she couldn't I think) and no friendliness whatsoever. I tried to move things along by turning over. She reached straight for a condom with no warm up whatsoever. Put it round mr floppy and started sucking. Odd experience to say the least. After a while it actually had an affect though. Stopped her before she made me cum and she lay back ready for sex (profile says trimmed, but fuck me there was a lot of hair there). She started wiping the Jonny with a wet wipe (confused by that but ok). Led back and ready. I started wanking to get fully hard but she slapped my hand away muttering something in Thai (I think). She wiped the condom again... very clinical. Carried on, mostly hard and she started with the fake moaning straight away. Why do they do that? Tried for a kiss but that was never going to happen. Anyway, carried on for a few minutes and came in the bag.
Afterwards, I had a go at conversation while getting dressed. Asked if she was from Thailand. She had no idea. Well, this was a TOFTT punt, and I honestly wouldn't bother.
Positives : decent covered BJ
Negatives : body was not good, refused French (or any type) of kissing, not a word of English (except 'how long'), fake moaning, massage was not a massage. Imagine Ross in friends with the tonker trucks. Pretty much everything else really.
