That's the geezer, Scutty Brown. I believe Samson told Delilah that he was going out for the evening to see his Gran because she was poorly but instead he went clubbing to Gaza with his two mates David and Goliath. Samson knew the doorman or because they trained at the same gym so they all got in free. Anyway they got pissed and David and Goliath fell out. David starter chucking stones about with a catapult, one hit Goliath and at all kicked off. So those two knobs got hoyed out and barred but Samson was allowed to stop cause he knew the bouncer, see. Anyway he ended up having a skin full, went home with a kebab, fell asleep on the sofa and woke up the next morning with chilli sauce everywhere having pissed himself with Delilah standing over him.
She went mental, Scutty! She'd rung his Gran's to see when he was coming home and..well ..
Anyway she told him he was a drunken, lying worthless piece of shit and slammed out of the house saying "and get your hair cut, you scruffy bastard."
So a couple of days and a doc of chocolates and the obligatory bunch of flowers later, Delilah's calmed down a bit so Samson says, "listen love, lets go into Preston, I'll get me hair cut and while I'm doing that, you take my credit card and go and treat yourself to some new shoes or dress or sommat from Next or Debenhams if they yet.
So they go into town, but they can't find anywhere to park because car parks haven't been invented, of course. So Samson still trying to recoup a few brownie points says "Look, love I'll drop you off outside the shops so you don't get wet (cause it was raining, Scutty you see). He says to her that he knows a back street just off North Road behind Gaza club near where they might build bus station one day and where there's no double yellows. So he drops the missus of, drives round the back of Gaza and as he's getting out of the car, he spots this bird flashing her tits at him out of the upstairs flat window and there's a red candle burning in the window because they hadn't thought up electricity yet so it couldn't be a red light. He was lucky to have a car if you think about it.
Anyway, Scutt...are you following the story? So there he is, his bollocks haven't been emptied for the last week cause he was in shit with er indoors.
So, he's still got his long hair and so all his energy and power and stuff and, thinking the old bag for life is going to a couple of hours, its only going to be 10 minutes of a job to have a number2 all over at the barbers, he thinks why not?
So in he goes, she's hiding behind the door, like they do and upstairs they go. He books 30 minutes and rags the poor cow round the bedroom for the next half hour.
So off down stairs he goes, a few ounces lighter and happy as a Judas nailing a carpenter to a cross, opens the door, steps out on the street and whose walking right past at that very moment.....It's only bloody Chantelle, Delilah's mate from Bingo who lives round the corner from the Gaza club and knows that its a knocking shop upstairs from the Gaza club.
So obviously it gets straight back to Delilah who loses her rag with him, she cuts his hair off, shaves his bollocks and then leaves him and goes back to her Mothers. When her Mother, who's a Daily Mail reader, a bit "Higher Penwortham", Scutty, you know what I mean? She is appalled at this den of iniquity plying it's trade in Preston, she rings the old bill, they go round asking questions. It turns out the owner of the Gaza night club was bank rolling the gaff for the pros, he gets nicked for living off immoral earnings, loses alcohol and spirits licence, the club shuts down, the brass has to start working Fletcher Rd and Red Light area. Then the next thing, a tile company takes over the lease on the building turns it from a night club into tile shop and Bob's your uncle.
I think the bloke who got done for running the brothel came out of the nick, negotiated a sub tenancy from the tile place lads for the the flat upstairs saying he wasting to live there.
Apparently there have be working girls in there ever since and he lives in fucking Puerto Benus or something.
Anyway, thats what I heard, Scutty.
