London massage shop mini reviews

[eirejig]

Bamboo Massage Bromley on a Sunday

Linda Late 30s Chinese
Very slim, no scars, small boobs and tidy poon.

45min £45

Long time since I tried this place, was walking by and popped my head in and an attractive young Chinese lady said hello so I went in.

after 15 mins of a nice sensual soft massage she asked the question about extras. I asked whats on offer she said HJ or B2B and asked what I paid last time. I said 20/40 and she said no.. now it's 30/60.
I said ok to B2B. she disrobed and I was impressed. B2B soon turned into her nearly sitting on my face and I started some RO which she seemed to really enjoy.
I asked about more and she said BJ 20 more so I said yes. she tried to take out some piece of plastic for this but I said no and took out a condom and what proceeded next was a fantastic quite deep throat BJ from here sitting on the floor while I sat on the edge of the massage table. I asked about FS she said she doesn't do that, although at the end she said maybe sometime. Not sure if she was just trying to get me to come back.
I was struggling to come from the BJ and time was starting to run out.. she was sucking for a long time it was great. I asked if I could finish on her and she said yes so I came all over her small tits.

Showered and she also showered and scrubbed her self pretty well which was good to see.
Overall a great experience even if it all seems to be a bit more expensive than a few years back. I'd return.

[folma322]

New shop luna near oval station, inspired by this thread https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=461359.0. Had a random Monday off with nothing to do so decided to try someplace new.

Didn't call ahead and just walked in, saw a girl call Abby who is slim and has a pretty face, age I'd estimate as late 20s / early 30s . She has better English than most Chinese massage shop girls. Was £60 for the hour, Decent massage but no hint of sensual stuff during it.

On the turn was offered HJ for £50, i asked for B2B and she said £80 for topless HJ only and no B2B on offer. Nice B cups but not super firm. Makes eye contact and smiles during the HJ with good technique and prolonged. Didn't attempt to have a suck on her tits as this was my first time doing topless only HJ, already felt like I was overpaying and didn't wanna risk paying more as I'm easy to convince once the little brain takes over.

Clean up after cumming then to adjoining shower room. The room has two doors one for the massage room I was in and one to IDK. I'm not completely sure how many massage rooms they have. So there's a semi decent chance someone could walk in when you shower if your not careful.

She works Monday / Tuesday. Would visit this place again if i have a failed punt nearby and need a backup.

[another381]

Thanks for this intel. Not local to me but would visit if in the area. I carry condoms when I go for a massage just in case they're needed and i don't always trust the cheap ones they have.

I get of on the WSWS but ultimately I want fs to be on the menu. Shame its pricey but its part of the fun of going for a massage and coming away with more.

Dr Gu in Clapham Sunday's. Super Skinny Chinese late 30s/40s could be higher, Barely any / A cup tits, and a tattoo on her chest, resembles the older lady from evergreen health in Barnet.
£60 for the hour starts off with grabbing/fondling my ass which i always a good sign, pretty standard massage. On the turn offered HJ/B2B asked for OWO + FS but neither of us had a condom, so agreed to B2B + OWO for £80.  Didnt get a name.

Starts with some body kissing into DFK she turns around to 69 position and starts a pretty good BJ. Nice clean shaven pussy to lick and suck on, I did think about licking the starfish but she has one of those outie butholes and thought against it. Eventually lay her down and do RO which she seemed really into. Allowed fingers and was wet but couldn't fit 2 in due to how tight she was. Get back to sitting position DFK while she wanked me to completion. This place is i would say a reliable place for FS just bring your own protection.

[folma322]

Based on a recent review of this place https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=458868.0 i decided to give it a go. The thread spoke of much older Chinese massage girls and i was feeling something 50+ so decided to give this place a go.

Price, Services and description of the masseuse:
£60 / hr massage + £100 OWO RO FS. The girl is a slim 30 something Chinese girl with a pretty face. B cup breasts with dark round marble shaped nipples. Hairy pussy with dark meaty lips that tasted fresh. Around 5'2 with wide hips but a slim waist and a small arse typical of Chinese girls. Didnt get a name.

Saturday walk-in greeted by the male receptionist and asked for an hours massage. Out popped a slim Chinese girl didn't get a full look yet. Ushered into a room right by the front door of the establishment while she left me to get ready. Paid £60 for the hour deep tissue massage. Up-sold from £50 for relaxing massage.

Undressed, no visible towel so lay down on the very thin massage table. I wasn't going to wear a towel even if there was one. There is a monitor in the room which has a view of the reception area. Unusual to normal Chinese places they were playing regular music instead of Chinese music. Massage was done with gloves. It was OK but not sensual at all. Only towards then she was feeling up my balls while i started rubbing her pussy through her black gym / lulu lemon leggings. The girl has little to no English. Mimicked a hand job and taking off her clothes. Offered £60 for B2B which she accepted. She then said BJ and i said yes. We didn't agree pricing but i got up and gave £80 which she was happy with.

Started off OK by climbing on and some lip kissing but no tongue. Lately i have realised that Chinese massage girls are more open to kissing when clean shaven than when i have my usual short stubble beard. She makes her way down to my cock. BJ wasn't great, mostly licking the shaft and sucking just the head, all very slow and quiet. I offered to lick her pussy and she accepted, lay her down on the table. She was moaning but very quiet, the room was so close to the front reception area where the male receptionist was sitting and could occasionally hear people outside on the street. I assume he knows what goes on but its all very awkward, Also they don't lock the front door when at capacity so a few people did walk in to be rebuffed by the receptionist.

After a few mins i ask if we can fuck, offered £20 more and she produced a condom. Fucked in missionary but she was tight and limiting entry to start off. Feeling awkward about people hearing us we went at it slow till i eventually came. I could see and hear the receptionist talking to someone on the monitor so had a little performance anxiety due to how close they were. She Showered followed by me, a little chit chat about which days she works (only Saturday) and i was on my way. On the way out i had a fleeting glance at a more Milf-ier Chinese girl.

Summary:
Would i visit again? Probably not. While the girl was attractive, this place is out of the way for me. For massages I mostly go to a few usual spots after the gym and this place is not quick to get to for me / lack of fallback options i know of nearby. Based on the thread linked, this shop does seem like a place to get a massage + potential for FS. If i did go again would much prefer a room at the back.

[5amtheRam]

The massage is £60 if you pay cash and she won’t ask for extra money - I never asked for extras initially and went for a genuine massage which btw she is really good at, it just just happened that one of the times she would do my inner thighs and just caress your Crown Jewels which then ended up in a HJ and once massage is done she just cleaned up and left.

She always does this going forward, nothing is discussed she does the massage and then when time comes do what you want - she has let me rub her pussy , suck on tits , slap her ass , b2b just not penetration

I always tip her £10-£20 but she did tell me to keep it on low

Thanks for this- I noticed she also works at the Askew road one as I saw her name on the list when looking about to what's near me-

What does she look like? Slim? Large? Pretty or no etc?

I'll pop a reveiw up here if/when I see her as Askew Rd is much closer to me than Norbury!

[Johnny]

Was in the coulsdon area recently, after being ghosted somewhere else. Anyways, a series of unfortunate navigation events meant instead of my plan b I ended up in oriental massage coulsdon. Quite an exposed shop front, but I’m not a local. Annoyingly they are not discrete inside either- punters cross paths, punters are sat in the ground floor waiting room before being taken downstairs.
50 for 60, decent massage at firm pressure from a Chinese lady with your bog standard mum tum, push up bra under a jumper and white leggings. She really wasn’t doing anything for me and wasn’t very flirty at all, so I just paid 30 for HE. Strange technique with the annoying “staring off into space”, what was worse was that as soon as she saw me start to finish, out came the rather rough paper towels, which she wrapped round me as she continued tossing. Not a pleasant experience.

There was at least one other girl there plus the mamasan, but I wouldn’t bother heading back if I was passing through as it’s a bit of a treadmill.

[y101y]

Visited Balance at Earl’s Court. Seems to be run by the same lady as Elements a few doors down as I saw her going into elements but sitting on the sofa of Balance when I was leaving.

Anyway, Kelly (I think) took me downstairs. Short and squat and not my usual preference but pleasant and I didn’t have much time so didn’t shop around. Heard at least a couple other girls there during my massage.

Massage for 50 for an hour and was delivered well. Light and teasing, half way through the question came. Agreed on 70 for b2b. She stripped to reveal a surprisingly attractive body. Let me play with all parts and even slip a couple fingers in. Popped and had a shower in the room.

Good attitude, nice conversation, great hj made up for the slight looks concern. I did ask about FS and she was definitely up for it but gave a confusing answer that made me believe I was going to be paying 120 for that alone so passed.

[LLPunting]

Carrying over discussion:

Skyline in Lewisham, Herbal Clinic in Cricklewood and Akos in Edgware basically have the same business model and are the only three non-TCM shops in London I can think of these days (i.e. non-Chinese or Thai staff).

Akos/Natural Tree mix Chinese and foreigners.

The AThree lot?

There was a shop in Ealing Bdwy opposite the Chinese Wellbeing lot, possibly Blue Orchid but don't steamroll in with a boner expecting relief. Had some international girls on the menu.  Met a 20s latina who was a bit musty with nice curves and took a plating over a year back tho.

There will be a bunch of others dotted about, too many latinas in town for some not to washout as FT FS girls in a bhouse, plus all those desperate low wage immigrants needing to pay London rates.

What about some of those Afro hair and nail shops you spotted offering massage?

Perhaps best to cut this over to the parlour thread. Everyone's answers continue over there...

Further discussion reply below please

[sparkus]

Athree not been to in years, noting all reviews since have been dire.

As far as I'm aware, I'm the only person on this board who has swung the bat in a black hairdressers and had a massage there - was seen by a very legit Indian lady who appeared from the back and the terry towelling table cover gave me a very nasty skin infection.

There was a report by a SWERF group like 15 years ago that claimed there was "widespread" "hidden prostitution" "across London" "operating from" nail bars and the like but I've never seen or heard of any.

All my attempts at visiting anything 'promising' (e.g. black or Indian staff working out front) have been rebuffed with "women customers only".

Hope that helps.

[LLPunting]

Athree not been to in years, noting all reviews since have been dire.

As far as I'm aware, I'm the only person on this board who has swung the bat in a black hairdressers and had a massage there - was seen by a very legit Indian lady who appeared from the back and the terry towelling table cover gave me a very nasty skin infection.

There was a report by a SWERF group like 15 years ago that claimed there was "widespread" "hidden prostitution" "across London" "operating from" nail bars and the like but I've never seen or heard of any.

All my attempts at visiting anything 'promising' (e.g. black or Indian staff working out front) have been rebuffed with "women customers only".

Hope that helps.

Had a couple of less severe skin reactions in ropey places I should've avoided just need to keep wits dialed to 10 for the presence of suitable hygiene safety.

Only seen the women only in areas perhaps higher concentration of female S Asians and some Muslim concentrations.

I do keep an eye out when passing Afro-Carib spas mentioningg massage. So far only seen real hefty matrons staffing so not enquired.

[sparkus]

Had a couple of less severe skin reactions in ropey places I should've avoided just need to keep wits dialed to 10 for the presence of suitable hygiene safety.

Only seen the women only in areas perhaps higher concentration of female S Asians and some Muslim concentrations.

I do keep an eye out when passing Afro-Carib spas mentioningg massage. So far only seen real hefty matrons staffing so not enquired.

I think one issue is that there's a LOT of beauty places that all use the same generic signs to order that list various treatments (e.g. facisls  ) that include 'Massage' but they don't offer it at all.  For instance, there is a Turkish barber near me and they've scribbled out the 'Massage' from their list below the window 

[LLPunting]

I think one issue is that there's a LOT of beauty places that all use the same generic signs to order that list various treatments (e.g. facisls  ) that include 'Massage' but they don't offer it at all.  For instance, there is a Turkish barber near me and they've scribbled out the 'Massage' from their list below the window 

That might also explain those narrow salons open all the way through and out the back door with no sign of a private space.

[stampjones]

.  For instance, there is a Turkish barber near me and they've scribbled out the 'Massage' from their list below the window 

Yikes 😱

[sparkus]

Yikes 😱

I wonder if anyone went in and asked for one?!

[stampjones]

I wonder if anyone went in and asked for one?!

I just can't get this image out of my head of a big hairy guy rubbing his hands together saying, right, on the table

[B2BEnthusiast]

I wonder if anyone went in and asked for one?!

I'm more thinking if a guy goes in there with a more "natural" look downstairs do they do the same as what they do for the ear hair?

Do they have a fire extinguisher handy? Fire Brigade? I've known some guys who put gorillas to shame...

Removed, no social media.

[daviemac]

I'm more thinking if a guy goes in there with a more "natural" look downstairs do they do the same as what they do for the ear hair?

Do they have a fire extinguisher handy? Fire Brigade? I've known some guys who put gorillas to shame...

Removed, no social media.

22 Privacy of service providers
Personal information about service providers must not be shared.
No social media content is permitted under any circumstances. This includes links, URLs, usernames, handles, profile names, personal profiles, business pages, professional pages and any other information that identifies or directs users to a social media account. This applies to all social media platforms, whether the account is public or private.
Photos of service providers may only be posted if they are currently used in their UKP advertisement. Photos taken from WhatsApp, social media or other private sources are prohibited, as are reposted photos no longer used in a current advert.
Phone numbers are only permitted if publicly displayed in a current advertisement. Personal numbers and room numbers are prohibited. Hotels may be named, but not specific rooms, house numbers or street addresses.
General descriptions of in-call locations are permitted, but exact house numbers and street names are not.
Media-related work, including modelling or pornography, may be shared where the individual has deliberately sought publicity. News items are also permitted.
These restrictions do not apply to individuals with criminal convictions or documented past name changes, which are not censored.

[Pedrodomino]

Went to Yo on whitecross street - had a very very firm massage bordering on painful. Was offered B2B for 60 or HR for 50, decided to pass as I wasn't really attracted to the mid 20s Chinese girl.

Hopped over directly to Natural Elements in Farringdon to try and finish the job. Sensational petite Chinese girl was at reception but they didn't have availability for another 30 mins so decided to walk over to Leather Lane.

Went to the first shop on Leather Lane on the left if you're coming from clerkenwell - didn't catch the name. Receptionist smiled at me from outside. I thought she's way too fit no way she's the masseuse.  Her mate working with her was fit too. First girl ended up being the masseuse. Massage was fine, didn't really need one after Yo but really appreciated her sensual feminine nature and was incredibly attracted to her. To my surprise she offered FS on the flip which surprised me as that's never happened to me. Hate paying by card but coughed up the 150. really  enjoyed fucking her can't wait to go back. She's mid 20s, didn't catch her name.

[folma322]

For instance, there is a Turkish barber near me and they've scribbled out the 'Massage' from their list below the window 

I used to frequent a Turkish barber's that did give a neck shoulder massage during a hot towel shave. Not something that was advertised though and I always thought it was to kill time when the towel was on my face. Sometimes done by hand and sometimes by massage gun. Stopped going there when though when the price of a hair cut + beard/trim cost more than a massage + hj at a Chinese shop.