Lancaster Massage

[JOEY 2017]

Overdue review but around  Xmas time I stupidly got the urge to sample the Thai Angels in Lancaster. Boxing Day if not mistaken.
Anyway good comms as Annika I think it was appears to take all the bookings even though usually she is in Manchester massage parlour apparently. It was late afternoon I rang an got a booking for 1hr but traffic delayed me by five mins and received text after text re are you coming! Parked just up the road in pay and display £1.20 for an hr and ran down the busy one way system to their entrance situated for all to see. However I managed to text "I'll be with you in twenty seconds" and as it now transpired it was the owner I believe who met me at the door and I went straight in!

She led me upstairs to a dimly lit room that I felt was o.k but not pristine I felt had the lights gone on! Anyway cost of the massage was agreed at £40 and there was a bit of a language issue it appeared re a towel but we got there in the end. I lay down and I asked for a firm massage as needed totally relaxing. During the massage I was questioned as to what I was doing in Lancaster? " Just passing through" I said and needed to relax as totally stressed out. The massage to be honest wasn't brilliant ,would have expected better from the owner as it turned out during the massage. She then told me her usual girls had been given the day off and she was the hard working boss. Fcuk no chance of a H.E then! She then reveals I was the only customer all day and she was just about to call it a day when I rang. I mentioned I was concentrating on keeping the little feller under control as did not wish to offend re being quiet during the massage when she tentatively began suggesting she didn't want me leaving without being fully relaxed. And She didn't do this sort of thing all the time. Game on I  so after a bit of jokey giggly conversation we finally got the H.E service offered. £30 she said at first  but I stuck to my guns and said I only had £60 on me so she agreed £20 for the H.E and the service began. I think it was clear she doesnt do this all the time by her technique but it was a result all the same. Shot my load which she once again wasn't totally refined in the aftermath clean up! I guess being the only customer of the day saved the day for me but feel its not a service she provides to readily, it was just the situation. Another Neutral rating as the massage wasn't really that great but got a result I wasn't expecting. Pleasant enough lady but the English barrier was deliberate at times I thought just incase!  However I will post again re a return visit I made shortly after which was a Negative!!!!   

[JOEY 2017]

As promised from my earlier post a second review of this establishment. I happened to be driving up the M6 again and so I dropped a text to  Thai Angels asking for a 1hr booking and hoped I would be getting the full sensual service I got last time for my money?  I wanted to leave fully relaxed like last time, good comms from Annika and a  reply came shortly after confirming the time etc.

Headed into Lancaster around the central ring road and parked five mins away juts up the road just before Tesco in a small car park pay and display £1.20 I think it was for the hour.

The entrance is as we know on the main one way system and I don't think they have a back entrance so you are in full view of passing traffic etc, hopefully not relatives on a day trip. I text once again as before when I was approached the door some thirty seconds away but this time I was left on the door step waiting for anybody to let me in! Eventually a medium build Thai Girl came down the stairs in no rush to let me in aged about mid to late twenties I think looking half asleep. Violia I think her name was but not 100% sure ? Not a stunner and not the warmest of greetings I have ever had as I was led upstairs by the girl clinging to her mobile phone! We entered to the same room as I has been in before and I am thinking I hope my wishes have been passed on to this girl?

I tentatively mentioned I had been before and had left to continue my journey North feeling totally relaxed! She didn't even raise an eyebrow and asked me to get on the table and proceeded to give the most feeble of massages. Constantly yawning and texting on her phone at one point it actually rang and she continued one handed, not that two where much better! Then the door bell went and she left the room, no apology and I could hear the punter at the door asking for an 1hr session. No problem she said I will ring the other girl who was clearly not in the building but not far away as she was there in minutes. The other masseur went upstairs which is above the room I was in waiting for my massage to continue! She seemed jolly from what I could hear as she passed the door laughing and giggling with the man who had just walked in by chance. Clearly drawn the short straw here I thought and I was correct a complete was of £40 and not even a suggestion of H.E or anything else for that matter. Totally annoyed at what had just happened I left and I text the boss and told her what had just unfolded and that I was not happy with the service provided by this girl and her constant use of the mobile phone throught the session I got a reply straight away and Annika gave her apologies "so sorry "although she did question my integrity regarding the use of the phone during the session. "I am not in the habit of telling lies" I replied swiftly and she assured me she would be having strong words and hoped I would return in order for them to remedy the poor service given.

Not a chance I was already in the car and about to head north when her reply came in and I replied " I would be stopping in Carlisle next time and wouldn't waist my time or money by pulling into Lancaster"! Not Annika's fault really just a lazy,can't be arsed member of staff left to their own devices and not just because no other services had been offered! 

All in all shocking service provided back in mid February and not the attitude to get repeat business thats for sure!

NEGATIVE