Author Topic: Hot Lorena 22 TOFTT What a blunder  (Read 2906 times)


3 review(s) for Hot Lorena 22 (0 positive, 1 neutral, 2 negative) [Indexed by ]
4 review(s) for Hot Laura 20 (0 positive, 1 neutral, 3 negative) [Indexed by tomato sauce and waffles]
13 review(s) for Melina21 (0 positive, 1 neutral, 12 negative) [Indexed by sunnyj]
13 review(s) for Ariana 20 (0 positive, 1 neutral, 12 negative) [Indexed by scutty brown]

Offline killerbees

External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only Lorena 22

I was feeling a strong and urgent need to empty the cojones all day at work. In fact, I had the raging horn.
I ran a location scan on aw and narrowed it down to 3 potentials. I was tired after two nights of poor sleep so a primary objective of the punt was that I wanted it to be walking distance from my office near Marble Arch.
I think the combination of tiredness and horniness clouded my judgement. But I only have myself to blame. This girl has two glowing reviews on aw. But as we all know a review on aw is about as worthless as a Zimbabwean five pound note.

Comms
Fairly decent, I said I am nearby and would be there in 15 minutes and she texted the address. The flat is near Bond St station and on the 4th floor.

Damage
£120 for one hour


The door opening

When the door opened, it was from a tall and thin girl in a nice black lingerie ensemble of stockings, suspenders, knickers and basque.
Was it the girl in the photos? Well if it was, the guy who has done the Photoshop should book himself a one way plane ticket to Silicon Valley. He will never be out of work.
Facially she reminded me of Ray Reardon, the legendary snooker player. There was definitely something of the Transylvanian Nosferatu about her.I couldn't get his face out of my head when I was looking at her face. It didn't really make me want to pot her pink let alone her brown.

The shower
As I had just come for work, I asked for and was granted a shower. The shower head was silver and thin, like one of those thin microphones you sometimes see 80s bands using on TOTP2.
I switched the shower on and was greeted with a burst of water faster than a particle blasted around the Hadron Collider. The shower head was obviously not equipped for this velocity and it flew off its holder and went haywire squrting me full in the face and continued to fly. The result was a soaked bathroom floor. I wrestled control of the shower head back and minimised the flow.
An observation in the shower was two mach 3 razors, perhaps multiple Sergeis occupy the flat also.

The act

This was as bad as you could actually imagine. Her likes list is patently a lie and a deception.
Whilst lying on the bed she took off my boxers and I thought she would start fellatio straight away as her likes list states owo.
She went to put a condom on it and I said can she do owo. Her retort in broken English was she only does ow.
To say I was disappointed would be an understatement. But I just wanted a release so I pondered on to the final inevitable lacklustre, insipid and anti climatic finish.The bird peck kissing, fake groaning, mechanical movements made me ponder my existence.
It was truly dreadful. The only saving grace was that she had a fairly fit body.
I fucked her firstly her on top, then doggy and I finsihed in missionary. To be honest I was trying to get it over as quickly as possible.
The whole redezvous after the shower to climax lasted about ten minutes. I got up straight after coming and said I have to go back to work and made a sharp exit. The only solace I got from this miserable experience was that as I was leaving, we walked past the bathroom and the maid was mopping up the flood I had caused in the bathroom. The maid then mouthed something in a clearly disgruntled manner to the WG. Presumably she was berating me for the bathroom floor being flooded.


Conclusion

This was the first time that I have visited a Romainian WG and it will be certainly be the last. If the next choice open to me is punting a Romainian WG or having a menage a trois with Vanessa Feltz and Anne Widdecome then I'll gladly be the Salami between that fatty sandwich. Please save your hard earned and avoid this girl.






« Last Edit: December 06, 2016, 10:27:43 pm by killerbees »

Offline peter purves

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External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only Lorena 22


The door opening

When the door opened, it was from a tall and thin girl in a nice black lingerie ensemble of stockings, suspenders, knickers and basque.
Was it the girl in the photos? Well if it was, the guy who has done the Photoshop should book himself a one way plane ticket to Silicon Valley. He will never be out of work.
Facially she reminded me of Ray Reardon, the legendary snooker player. There was definitely something of the Transylvanian Nosferatu about her.I couldn't get his face out of my head when I was looking at her face. It didn't really make me want to pot her pink let alone her brown.


 :lol:

Nice review, sorry about your experience  :(
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mrhappypants

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Covered service  :thumbsdown: Misrepresented covered service :thumbsdown: :manhater: :angry:

Sorry you had a bad one, thank you for sharing and better luck next time.

Offline The_Don

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Thanks for the warning, by the current reviews on UKP. She sound like, a W/G to avoid.

Her profile states, she Greek (I know the A/W verification system is rubbish). Seems to be some confusion over her birth place. Also noted in another review, about Greek and Transylvania.

But you stated:


This was the first time that I have visited a Romainian WG

Have you External Link/Members Only, this or do you know more. Please enlighten us (if that the case)  :unknown:

 

Offline killerbees

Thanks for the warning, by the current reviews on UKP. She sound like, a W/G to avoid.

Her profile states, she Greek (I know the A/W verification system is rubbish). Seems to be some confusion over her birth place. Also noted in another review, about Greek and Transylvania.

But you stated:

Have you External Link/Members Only, this or do you know more. Please enlighten us (if that the case)  :unknown:

I did state that, very observant. If she's Greek then I'm from the planet Zorg. I can tell the difference between a Romanian and a Bubble lol. No need to go full Brent...

Offline The_Don

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I did state that, very observant. If she's Greek then I'm from the planet Zorg.


Thanks for the reply.

I was just wondering, if she spoke in Romanian etc!

As over the years, I've picked up a few basic words in other languages and found it can be useful, at times. 


I can tell the difference between a Romanian and a Bubble lol.

Its been some time since I heard that


Offline killerbees


Thanks for the reply.

I was just wondering, if she spoke in Romanian etc!

As over the years, I've picked up a few basic words in other languages and found it can be useful, at times. 


Its been some time since I heard that

No worries, if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck and gives a sub par service....

I noticed that someone spoke a few Greek words to her in another thread, perhaps she has found a few Greek words useful too...

Offline The_Don

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I noticed that someone spoke a few Greek words to her in another thread, perhaps she has found a few Greek words useful too...

Fair point  :lol:

Offline killerbees



Fair point  :lol:

I misread, this is from OP on another review of her:

" Is she Greek?? I asked her to speak Greek and she came up with a few words."

Why she's a modern day Socrates. I missed out on these sage words form her.

Offline loner

Sorry to hear about your experiences and thank you for the review. I have to say though i found your review very funny and entertaining.