External Link/Members OnlyWithout a doubt, the worst punt EVER. This will be a long review, because I need to get all this anger out of me, and she ruined a pleasant day. Shocking. Shocking. Shocking.
Paid - £80 for 10 MINS. Yes, 10 mins.
Communication - Excellent. All done through text. Very responsive.
I was looking incredibly forward to seeing her. Profile showed up, and I booked through text. An incall for half-an-hour. As I approached, the door opened before I could knock. She looked very nice, BUT I'm extremely convinced her pictures are all fake. I mean, the pictures do give an accurate presentation of her, but I'm 99.99% convinced she's stolen pictures from this person:
External Link/Members OnlyThis is NOT the same person I saw.
She welcomed me in, and asked if I wanted a drink, some water, or a coffee. She seemed really friendly and professional, and, already, I thought this would an amazing punt just from her professionalism. I was SO wrong.
She said to go into the bedroom, and take my clothes off, and that she would join me soon. Entered the bedroom, and it was REALLY dark. I tried to turn on the switch, but it did nothing. I took my clothes off in front of her in silence. It was really awkward.
She said all her services are covered. Fine by me. On with the condom for some OW, and it was very average. It was like putting my penis into a pencil sharpener. I wanted to feel her body with my hand, as she was poorly sucking me off. As soon as I touched the side of her stomach, she shook and said "Ooh!" , and it scared me a bit. She said her stomach was really sensitive. It felt like touching her body was not allowed.
I asked her if she kisses. She went into a lengthy talk about her braces and to not get my tongue involved, because it might get stuck in her braces. I said, "Okay." She just gave two pecks on the lips, and went back to her shitty blowjob.
I had enough of her crap oral, and then she asked me where I wanted her. I said on top. She got on top, and rode me in a lethargic kind of way. Her hair was covering the side of her face, so I couldn't even see her. I tried bringing her body closer to mine, but she resisted. There's only so much I could do.
Cowgirl was going pretty lame. Then, she said, "Let's try doggy, darling." She got into position, and this smell of FISH and GARBAGE was coming from her vagina. As soon as I smelt it, I felt very turned off and almost sick. I nearly lost my erection. It shocked me, how a decently attractive woman like her could smell so terrible down there.
She lay on her back for missionary. I stuck it in, and then she placed her fucking knees up against my chest?! Like, what the fuck? How the hell am I supposed to pump like that? Any time I tried to pump with force, (I had to, because of her knees against my chest) she would use her hands to push against my knees.
I fucking had enough, and laid back on the bed. And this is where I almost lost it... When I abruptly pulled away from missionary, and laid back on the bed, she looked at me in a confused and rude way and said, "Whatchu' want?" It was like sitting at a table in a fancy restaurant, and the waiter asks you in a very rude way, "What do you want? Hurry up. I don't have all day".
I said to just finish me off with a handjob. She applied so much lube, and sat on the other side of the fucking bed, and had to stretch her arm to jerk me off. I think she was scared of any semen erupting on her.
This is the final nail in the coffin; as she was jerking me off, she sighed and looked to the side with a bored look on her face. Then, she looked into her lap with such a disengaged look on her face. I finally said I didn't want to be here anymore, and got up to get dressed. This is the first time I've never cummed in a punt.
As I was getting dressed, she had the nerve to suggest that the reason why I'm going so early is because of "stage fright!" I was extremely close to saying, "I wouldn't call it stage fright. I'd call it terrible, shitty service", but I kept quiet. I'm so impressed even now of how calm I handled myself.
I immediately used her bathroom to wash myself of that FISHY-GARBAGE smell from her pussy. When I came out of the bathroom, she went into it, and I could see her washing the sink just because I used it? I just felt so offended.
Once I got my stuff, I walked out furiously without looking at her or saying anything. I looked at my watch, and only 10 fucking minutes had past...
How the fuck does she have almost a 100 positive ratings on Adult Work?! I'm trying to think of WHY she treated me like that. Was it because of how I looked? I highly doubt it. I think of myself as good-looking. And I've seen greats like Michelle Independent, Emily19 and xHannahx (who are ten times more attractive than the girl I saw in this review), and they welcomed me with open arms, had a fantastic time, and they even spoke about me seeing them again.
So, there you go. Make your own judgements. Paid £80 for a shitty, rude service for 10 minutes. I should mark this as a positive review just to be extremely sarcastic.