Things prossies do to annoy...

[Brazilian Martian]

Asking punters personal questions about their life 

[E.L. Wisty]

Not listening to what the punter wants and give a crap, disinterested service.

[Nagilum]

When they give me my money back and insist.

[will-ow]

if they suggest a shower fine, but if when they say "are you clean,clean no? yes?"...... 

[ickydicky]

fart

[E.L. Wisty]

Never cleaning their arse before anal.

[ickydicky]

Never cleaning their arse before anal.

why anyone would want to shove their cock up a hoors arse when she has a pussy available for that beats me.

[Brazilian Martian]

why anyone would want to shove their cock up a hoors arse when she has a pussy available for that beats me.

Because anal sex is AWESOME 

[E.L. Wisty]

Because anal sex is AWESOME 

 

[Silver Birch]

Because anal sex is AWESOME 

 

[ickydicky]

a good bj with cim and swallow is grand. i refuse to indulge in lazy linguistic americanisms. and a good ride with an explosion inside a tight pussy is most satisfactory too. hope that suffices as to my preferences.

[JW.Bobbitt]

a good bj with cim and swallow is grand. i refuse to indulge in lazy linguistic americanisms. and a good ride with an explosion inside a tight pussy is most satisfactory too. hope that suffices as to my preferences.

+1

[purple_t]

Services advertised that they don't do just to get more views on their profile when guys search for these services

Running out of wet wipes.

Offering foot worship as a service but having poorly-maintained feet.

Suggesting we do something else to what I've just asked for.

[jaszyj87]

Take off the heels I've specified 2 min into the meet/ when they get on the bed

same with any outfit. "should I take it off?"  No why the fuck would I ask you to wear it just to take it off 5 min later

[bigjohn1987]

i will let you cim,cif fuck my ass, piss all over me,fuck my pussy, deep throat your cock & lick your ass hole clean.........but no DFK coz its to personal 

[mrdiamond77]

Because anal sex is AWESOME 

Much prefer vaginal myself.

[WhattheFlip]

i will let you cim,cif fuck my ass, piss all over me,fuck my pussy, deep throat your cock & lick your ass hole clean.........but no DFK coz its to personal 

Basically THE most ridiculous thing about the escorting world, in a world of many ridiculous things.

[Brazilian Martian]

Much prefer vaginal myself.

Nothing better than fucking a sexy woman up the ass   i lost my virginity fucking a girl in the ass when I was 13 in brazil

[Brazilian Martian]

Take off the heels I've specified 2 min into the meet/ when they get on the bed

same with any outfit. "should I take it off?"  No why the fuck would I ask you to wear it just to take it off 5 min later

I'm the opposite I tell them to keep the heels on especially if they are the stripper heels  that makes the jackhammering more intense

[Acerimmer]

Advertising anal then not doing it

Thinking oral requires the use of a hand

Fake moaning

Lying back and thinking of England ( more likely Romania nowadays) put some effort in love, I can get that at home.

Ignoring clothing requests

Being a completely different woman to the one on the profile

Looking at texts/ answering calls during my time

[bristolqwerty]

Charge for my charming company....

[lardybloke]

Insist on phone calls only/no texts.

Is there ANY logic at all behind this ridiculous rule?

Even a phone call isn't a guarantee of anything, and not in a bait and switch way. I rang and booked an EE lady a while back (can't remember her name, and her profile disappeared after 3 days or so, so no review) around Hounslow, she took the call and spoke pretty good English with an accent, got directions, went to see her, and whilst it was the lady in the AW profile, she spoke no English. Not a word of it, no yes or no, nothing at all. She had prices written down and we agreed a fee by pointing, and it was a good punt, but she nonetheless talked all the way through the booking in whatever her first language was, and out of habit I just ended up replying in English. She was in her 50's so at the time I didn't think she could be trafficked (I know on reflection that's ridiculously naïve but older lasses don't seem as vulnerable as young in my mind) but clearly it was more than a 1 woman operation.

Twas quite odd, in a 70's-sitcom-English-people-getting-into-hilarious-scrapes-with-foreigners-because-of-the-language-barrier stylee.

[hullad]

why anyone would want to shove their cock up a hoors arse when she has a pussy available for that beats me.

  my thoughts exactly

[E.L. Wisty]

Being mucked about by a WG over a period of several weeks, or months, when I have a genuine interest in seeing them for a meet.

[hendrix]

Charge.

[darkknightrises]

Asking if : " you wouldn't mind buying condoms on the way to hers as:
- she has run out
- not being to the shops yet
- doesn't want to go out as it's raining" 

[E.L. Wisty]

Asking if : " you wouldn't mind buying condoms on the way to hers as:
- she has run out
- not being to the shops yet
- doesn't want to go out as it's raining"

I had that from a WG once. She said she was unable to get condoms as the tyre on her car had gone flat. So she asked me to buy condoms. I was enjoying my brisk walk in the area she was working, only to suddenly be made to rush and buy condoms.

[Brazilian Martian]

I had that from a WG once. She said she was unable to get condoms as the tyre on her car had gone flat. So she asked me to buy condoms. I was enjoying my brisk walk in the area she was working, only to suddenly be made to rush and buy condoms.

I hope she deducted the price of the condoms from the punt

[E.L. Wisty]

I hope she deducted the price of the condoms from the punt

Yes she did. She took £10 off the total cost of the punt.

[bristolqwerty]

When you meet a Romanian escort who you find genuinely attractive.  You walk in, shake her hand and introduce yourself politely and say "you are very pretty" only to be met with her folding her arms, rolling her eyes and tutting  boner= goodnight fella
Hidden Image/Members Only

[vw]

Yes she did. She took £10 off the total cost of the punt.

Did that cover the condoms,  petrol and the energy used to move.?

[budz]

I get fed up with them not replying to messages.  I have booked a WG for a few weeks time for a 4 hour incall, going to cost me 500 notes but she does what I'm in to.  Messaged her a couple of days ago and today to ask a question.  She has read both but not replied to either. May take my money elsewhere

[bristolqwerty]

1. Complaining that "its taking to long to cum".  makes me feel really valued and appreciated Isn't that what were here for.  Change technique, excite my eyes and mind, make it seem that we are both working for the same team.  Its no coincidence that the best escorts I've seen have no problems.  For some others its like starting a fire with 2 pieces of wet wood whilst wearing boxing gloves
2. Also a WG telling me what I eat by the ******* of my man juice ~ its like a check out girl at Tesco saying " oh your having Pasta tonight whilst scanning some spaghetti through.
3. A WG who has "genuinely" chosen this profession herself moaning about their life "Sorry I don't care"
4. Untidy room/premises ( I had a couple of out calls to my home and its always been tided especially top to bottom )
5. Being left to clean up yourself. Surely an escort taking the care and time to clean me up is part of the service.  I was told once "I have no wet wipes or tissues" so I got up and went to the shower dripping over the carpet 
6. Not being in hearing distance of her mobile when I ring a minute before the booking time looing for the flat number.
Everything else is honestly all fine..................
 

[Boringbob]

Thinks they do that I hate....
Not doing what they advertise (most Romanians)
Not being the same girl (every single Japanese girl)
Pulling away at last sec on cim (only once, but it still smarts)
Saying "oh, I forgot the condoms!" When you are about to start the main event (happened last week)
Being too smacked out to fuck (Birmingham)
Having a penis ( I live in fear of this)
Being the whore who's pad gets raided by the fuzz just as she's about to blow you (I hated that one. Surreal experience. Too exciting and not to be repeated)

[od13218]

I like to speak to a wg on the phone so I can assess her attitude and friendliness. My guess is that wgs do the same, plus if a punter is too nervous to speak on the phone, it probably increases the chance that he will bottle out of the punt too.

+1
Personally I always like to speak to the WG to suss out their attitude, so I can understand if they want to do the same

[Bangers and Gash]

I get fed up with them not replying to messages.  I have booked a WG for a few weeks time for a 4 hour incall, going to cost me 500 notes but she does what I'm in to.  Messaged her a couple of days ago and today to ask a question.  She has read both but not replied to either. May take my money elsewhere

May take your money elsewhere??? 

Buddy. If this pro$$ie can't be arsed to answer a simple email when £500 is at stake, then what do you think she's going to be like in the sack?

It's a buyers market. 

[Belgarion]

1. Poor comms

2. Poor service - when I book to see a WG, I expect to get a talented woman who knows how to fuck. If I was after some bog standard sex, I would pull a civvie

3. False advertising

4. Bait and switch

5. Smokers breath after lying on profile you do not smoke

6. Enhanced breasts after lying on profile that they are real

[davidmatthewsII]

getting a blowjob or handjob and having her spit on my cock like she's a division 1 football player. Ill be really enjoying it then there's that sound of her coughing up one and just flobbing on my cock makes me go totally soft. Must be what getting a blowjob from Wayne Roooney sounds like. Who was it who told girls that kinda thing was sexy???

[E.L. Wisty]

Did that cover the condoms,  petrol and the energy used to move.?

Just the condoms. I was already in the area when she contacted me, and there were shops nearby, fortunately enough.

[Stoking]

Pulling away at last sec on cim (only once, but it still smarts)

I'll always remember the time I was aiming to CIM with a girl, and got too excited and cummed before she got close enough.... The look of disgust on her face and she was extremely grumpy and kicked me out in a hurry.

First time for everything eh?

[bristolqwerty]

I'll always remember the time I was aiming to CIM with a girl, and got too excited and cummed before she got close enough.... The look of disgust on her face and she was extremely grumpy and kicked me out in a hurry.

First time for everything eh?

she should've opened wide and caught your load ~ three meters is no distance. 

[Lucie268]

Never giving their exact location, but instead giving a random one.

This is a security measure. Sometimes guys like to collect addresses with no intention of showing up, so giving a landmark or just the street name means we can see you through the window to confirm you're actually here.

[Technicolour_trilby]

This is a security measure. Sometimes guys like to collect addresses with no intention of showing up, so giving a landmark or just the street name means we can see you through the window to confirm you're actually here.

...and leaving genuine punters looking shady as fuck in full public view. Aye, thanks for that sweetheart.

[Bangers and Gash]

Kicking off their stripper heels just 2 minutes into a punt. Keep them on, they're meant to be fucked in! 

[two20]

Asking you to ring on the morning at "X" to confirm then not answering. I realise why now. After the wisdom i've picked up on here (and Saafe), I mentioned I was a little nervous calling her. She translated that as "time wasting b'staad" of which I'm not. I think of the money, my money, she'll never get and it cheers me up.

[Leicpokerboy]

When I arrange a time get there text or call her to be told ok I just need 5 mins which is ok when it is 5 mins. But generally goes on longer.

Also the number of Times gas men cable men and landlords that turn up at the same time I booked is amazing lol.

[Lewis]

Because anal sex is AWESOME 

Someone once told me that any man who enjoys anal is on the verge of being homosexual.

After all said and done, an arse is an arse, whether it be a blokes or a woman's.

A cunt however only belongs to a woman.

[stevedave]

Someone once told me that any man who enjoys anal is on the verge of being homosexual.

After all said and done, an arse is an arse, whether it be a blokes or a woman's.

A cunt however only belongs to a woman.

By that logic, getting a blowjob makes you a bit of a bender as well then?

[Lucie268]

...and leaving genuine punters looking shady as fuck in full public view. Aye, thanks for that sweetheart.

What, being on the phone in public? So it's that versus putting ourselves at risk and letting anyone have our address for future reference? There have been times when escorts have had multiple guys show up at their door after someone has rung, got the address and then told all their friends.

[hullad]

I hate the sub language the working girls seemed to all adopt

HUN

BABE

DARL really winds me up

SWEETIE