Ok you've had your 30 seconds of fame so lets now address the profile:1. Bad intro
The first thing a client will see is your main picture then your opening paragraph. Your opening paragraph is the most important part of your profile. What you put here should be words that compliment your picture or sell whatever idea of you or your service that you want to appeal most to a potential client. If a guy looks at your Intro in it's present form the first thing they will see is some generic babble about a profile picture update? I'm sorry but that needs to go else where. Use the first paragraph to sell yourself. Think of the first paragraph as the 'Why should I give you this job' type question. If you don't sell yourself in those opening first lines the client will very likely move on.2. Don't advertise others
Just by putting CarlyG's name in your opening you have immediately distracted the focus away from yourself. Since the opening is already poor there is a possibility clients might start looking up who CarlyG is instead. She is not the queen of everything and if you read around a few punting forums you will find she is actually quite disliked. Having CarlyG's name in there doesn't give you extra 'cred', it actually takes it away from you.3. Too much text
The 'About Me' text is disjointed and doesn't flow. 'I am a genuine...' ?? Also having everything in bold doesn't make pleasant reading and is especially annoying when you start to get preachy which we will come on to.
The 'Try a sensual girlfriend experience' bit doesn't need you to list all your services again. However the extras do need to be made very clear and separate from the body of the text.
'Dress Code' - You can cut this right down and leave out the fake tan bit. If I see the words 'fake tan' or 'caked in make up' they create negative connotations and i'm going to start having doubts. Don't put negatives in your profile, stay positive.4. Too many FAQ's
Q Will I do Bareback A. No I want to live - This is too much, a simple 'No' or 'No, please do not ask' is fine, don't get all high and mighty, guys hate this.
Q Do you enjoy your job? - This is not necessary, they will be able to tell whether you do when they see you and besides no one ever answers 'No' so the question is pointless.
Q Do you swallow. A Thanks. But no thanks - Again you don't have to be smarmy with the answer, just answer 'No' or ensure in your profile text you clearly state you only provide the services shown with the exception of A and B which are C extra.
Q. Will you do watersports or hardsports? A. No- I don't think this is very clean. - Again, don't preach your personal opinion of a service, some clients like somethings and some don't, it's not for you to slap your personal opinion on it, that's a massive turn off.
Q. Do you need a driver? A. No. I have a car. Why would I pay for your fuel as well as mine??! - You are coming over as hostile and clients do not need to read this as drivers don't concern them.
Q. What shall I bring with me? - Remove the bit about gifts, if someone wants to give you a gift they will give you one.
Q. Do you work on your own? - Not necessary you can include note about your independence in your profile text.
Q. Pornstar experience? A. Lol no- all the fake moaning.... - Keep personal negative opinions out of it, instead turn it into a positive that you provide the best most sensual GFE... etc
Q. I have an appointment with you at 5pm... - Not needed, include in your text to please turn up on time at the time stated.
Q. Roleplay Please? A. I am not into the fantasy of being a 12 year old school girl. I used to offer roleplay but got asked for things I thought to be strange- so it is now off limits. Sorry - Keep personal opinions out of it.
Q. How many times can I cum? A. I give up how many times can you cum? - Now this is confusing as your website states:
£70 for half an hour all inclusive- Full Unrushed GFE onceGet this sorted asap, you have a cum once/cum twice policy on there. You need to be uniform with both your website and your AW profile or your are just inviting confusion.
£100 for 45 minutess all inclusive- Full Unrushed GFE twice
£130 for an hour all inclusive - Full Unrushed GFE as many times as you like
Q. We are a new agency recruiting.... A. No. Why would I want to pay you commission for something I can do all by myself??? - Clients don't need to read this, your battles with agencies are not their concern.
Q. What will you be wearing? - Not necessary if already covered in profile text
Q. Do you have a boyfriend? A. And why would this be your business? - Unnecessary question and even more unnecesary reply, the B word shouldn't even be in there, this is clients fantasy time.
Q. Where are you based? - Could be included briefly in main profile text.
Q. Can I text you for a booking? A. Yes providing you give me a brief intro of who you are, You must get straight to the point in a polite manner. Otherwise I will be inclined to ignore you. Simply because "hi are you avail? doesn't really do it for me! - Be specific, with what you want them to text you if you accept bookings this way i.e. requested date\time\duration
Q. Asian men? - Duplicate question, you've already covered this in the 'I see all ages and races bit in the main text'
There are too many FAQ's, your FAQ should be no more than about 6 or 7 questions or it's not going to be read and if it's read the reader will come away thinking you are bossy, preachy or very hard work. 5. Tabs
There are too many, how much attention span do you think most men have when horny?
Drop the Feedback's tab
. The Expectations
can be condensed in your main page. Incentives
tab can go, instead use the pricing on your main page to keep it clear, simple and consistent.6. AW Pics
Smile or put on a sexy pout but do anything except a generic 'facebook bathroom mirror pose', use your body more. Sell some sexy. There's a thread on here about sexy poses, have a read through.
The aim is to keep clients interested reading your profile while also conveying to them the key information you need them to know. I looked at your profile and I thought yes she's kind of cute. Then I read your profile and by the time I was finished I was completely put off - and the worst part is I actually like reading.