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External Link/Members OnlyFirst punt for a while and was looking for something a bit different, had an urge for a rub and tug with a bit of spanking thrown in. When you have seen as many fannies as I have, a bog standard punt is a bit...meh.
Plan A, B, C and D all fell through as expected (this is Dundee after all), but Fong Beer (weird name but hey ho) actually answered.
Comms:
Answered phone first time, discussed the necessary and flat number texted, no dramas.
Flat:
Up an alley, bit grotty on the outside, nice enough inside. Greeted by Ms Beer in a slightly odd looking lace dressing gown thing. Only paid parking nearby. Sounds of hoovering from another room (?).
Looks:
This is where things went downhill a bit, the photo in her AW page is definitely her but it's very cleverly lit/posed. She has a slightly angry, almost manic look about her, cut glass eyebrows and harsh makeup. Very short, 5'2" maybe, toned up top, decent tits, ok legs but an arse that didn't quite fit her. showed me through to a tidy room and a peculiar fan thing on the bed (see AW photo).
Punt:
First thing she asks is "how long" to which I reply "Already agreed, half an hour". Cash up front then disappeared for 5 minutes, fuck knows what she was doing she cam back looking exactly the same. It was then it became apparent whoever I had been talking to was not her, she hardly spoke a word of English. Onto the bed and the (dry) massage began, not great to be honest. Elbows digging into places they shouldn't really, body to body bit was ok but nothing to write home about. I suggested she give me a spanking to satisfy my inner kinkster, "I no understand", I sort of awkwardly demonstrate and she got the message but was utterly useless. Had I asked, I'm sure OWO would have been on the cards as indeed were other services but she also has "roleplay and fantasy" listed...no chance, unless your fantasy is being dry rubbed by a mute. Relief was dry (again) but ok I suppose, not as good as I could do on my own to be honest. Still 10 minutes left but by this time I just wanted away before the rain came on heavy.
VFM:
Not great, if this had been a £30 or even £40 punt it might have just about made a neutral, as a £60 punt it was a bit rubbish. Left feeling I should have just bought a curry.
Comms: 8/10 (credit given to whoever answered the phone)
Location: 7/10
Looks: 5/10
Services: 4/10
VFM: 3/10
If I could sum up the punt it would be a shrug of the shoulders.