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Author Topic: Saving a marriage  (Read 1453 times)

Offline Matium

If you're stuck in a sexless marriage or one where sex happens once or twice a year or infrequently, does seeing WGs help to save your marriage, since you no longer look to your wife for sex?

There are many married men who see WGs, as they provide an outlet for their sexual frustrations, but who would never dream of leaving their their wives.




Offline mofukker

i dont have this problem, i am married and have it regularly with the wife ,other girls and escorts, but i wouldnt stay in the marriage if i didn't get it regularly unless there was a medical or other problem, call me selfish or whatever but women know sex is important to a man , so if they are not providing we will go elsewhere

Offline Wayang

I thought UKP was about punting not carrying out irrelevant sociological surveys.

Offline AnthG

I thought UKP was about punting not carrying out irrelevant sociological surveys.
I think it might be interesting to possibly hear about some anecdotal stories of how its actually helped a relationship.

From what people suggest the people on Mumsnet are too quick to suggest punting has no benefits whatsoever.

Offline Wayang

I think it might be interesting to possibly hear about some anecdotal stories of how its actually helped a relationship.
From what people suggest the people on Mumsnet are too quick to suggest punting has no benefits whatsoever.

Where is your thought piece on life changing actions that you plan to take?  That is far more important.

Offline Daffodil

Where is your thought piece on life changing actions that you plan to take?  That is far more important.

The topic is valid and relates to punting. If you don't think so, don't contribute. Don't read it.

Anth's life decisions have nothing to do with you. You spend as much time on here as anybody.

In response to the op, yes I think it probably does help to save a marriage. It is not just women withholding sex, as the years pass both partners will feel less inclined to have sex with each other. If you don't particularly want to fuck the missus anymore, but still want sex, you have two options; divorce or extramarital sex. Sex with a pro$$ie is far more convenient and less likely to be found out than with the secretary.

That's not to say I would approve of Mrs Daffodil fucking other men to 'save the marriage'. Hypocritical, I'm sure.

Offline Matium

I think a lot of men turn away from their wives, because physical rejection really, really hurts. If you've reached out for your wife and she's shrugged her shoulders, moved out of the way, said she's got a headache or made it clear, verbally or through body language, that she's not going to have sex with you then you can't help but feel physically rejected.

And after that's happened a few times, most men retaliate by physically rejecting their wives and no longer bothering to get sex from them.

It's just human nature to shun after being shunned.

Offline Wayang

Anth's life decisions have nothing to do with you. You spend as much time on here as anybody.

I should have prefaced my remarks with IMHO.

IMHO - I think AnthG's life decision should concern us, not just me.  I am concerned, so should we all be.
« Last Edit: October 19, 2012, 06:24:51 PM by softlad »

I had the opposite problem with my ex.  She was as randy as a rabbit on Viagra, but I just stopped fancying her.  She accused me of all sorts, even asked me one time if I was gay (!), but funnily enough a pretty size 10-12 lass with boobs gets me rock-hard in, oh, at least 2 secs...

Offline sarahjayneleeds

  • Service Provider
  • Posts: 392
I have quite a few regular clients who openly admit to being married.  They say would never ever leave their wives and still love their wives dearly. They consider their wives to be their best friends still and still do the couples thing eg. out for meals etc but no longer have a sexual relationship or the ones that do have a very limited one for a variety of reasons.

 The ones that are open about being married consider it a much better option to seen me that to have an affair based on the fact there is no emotional attachment and much less complicated in general. As one of them explained he has less chance of his wife finding out anything untoward is going on and   as I don't contact him(or anyone else for that matter) at all unless he has contacted me within the last 30 mins and I won't be demanding he spends Xmas with me either!  :lol:
 
One particular gent was diagnosed with cancer which involved the removal of his testicals he is still able to get and maintain an erection and also able to cum. He has regular injections (every 6 weeks) to give him a libido as without these he simply stopped looking at women in a sexual way and no longer felt like a man. His sex life stopped after his op and himself and his wife  have never discussed   or had any sexual relationship since then. He thinks that she either thinks he can't anymore or has a fear of hurting him in some way. I have asked why they have never spoke and he said things are OK  as they are now, so no point really. As I said earlier he still loves his wife dearly and his attitude is that he pays for the bit that's missing from his marriage but he and her are perfectly happy with the rest of their marriage. So seeing me is basically adapting the situation within his marriage and filling a void in an otherwise perfectly happy marriage so who could argue or judge that in a negative way?

Another client who also was ill for a long time and was unable to continue a sexual relationship with his wife encourage her to go meet someone else to fulfill her sexual needs which she did after long discussions obviously. They continue to live together (they  have a few kids together) she continues to see this man for sex with his blessing. Although he is now recovered  they never got their sex life back on track (maybe due to her seeing the other guy who knows) but she also knows, and is OK that he see WG's. Both parties openly are aware that the other is getting sex elsewhere but they both are discreet about it and  maintain the illusion of marriage to the outside world and their children. This may not work for some  people but it works for them and that's all that matters, in my opinion I actually think its rather sweet. :). Again another example of working at a marriage that suits them and not necessarily what is consider the norm but not ended up with a messy divorce and kids being seen by Dad on a Sunday. So in answer to Matium there is YES  :)

Offline Matium

As one of them explained he has less chance of his wife finding out anything untoward is going on and   as I don't contact him(or anyone else for that matter) at all unless he has contacted me within the last 30 mins and I won't be demanding he spends Xmas with me either!  :lol:


You phone back?

I thought the convention was that the WG never phoned at all?

 :unknown:

Offline sarahjayneleeds

  • Service Provider
  • Posts: 392
Did I say I phoned? I send a text saying sorry I missed your call (no kiss etc )

Offline Matium

Ah, that's all right then!

Many a marriage saved by not phoning!

 ;)

Offline Matium


Another client who also was ill for a long time and was unable to continue a sexual relationship with his wife encourage her to go meet someone else to fulfill her sexual needs which she did after long discussions obviously. They continue to live together (they  have a few kids together) she continues to see this man for sex with his blessing. Although he is now recovered  they never got their sex life back on track (maybe due to her seeing the other guy who knows) but she also knows, and is OK that he see WG's. Both parties openly are aware that the other is getting sex elsewhere but they both are discreet about it and  maintain the illusion of marriage to the outside world and their children. This may not work for some  people but it works for them and that's all that matters, in my opinion I actually think its rather sweet. :) . Again another example of working at a marriage that suits them and not necessarily what is consider the norm but not ended up with a messy divorce and kids being seen by Dad on a Sunday. So in answer to Matium there is YES  :)

What you have done for that couple has definitely saved their marriage, Sarah!

:)

Offline Matium

A woman wrote to a WG thanking her for being with her husband and making her realise that she needed to be a more appreciative wife:

Quote
Why am I thanking you? Because if you hadn't responded, I might have never noticed I wasn't being a partner. I might have kept talking to my mother about my husband and our fights, thinking, "Thank God my mother understands." I wouldn't have understood that my husband and I needed to be a team, battling the world, instead of declaring war against each other. I wouldn't have learned that marriage doesn't guarantee a partner for life.

Without you, I wouldn't have realized that I needed to change. I wouldn't have learned to include my husband in making decisions. I wouldn't have learned to appreciate him as a spouse; the smell of him and his comforting presence at home. I wouldn't treasure every moment we triumphed together. I wouldn't have fallen back in love with the man I married.

Because of you, I chose to stay married. I bet you never thought you'd save a marriage.

http://www.yourtango.com/201082562/how-prostitute-saved-my-marriage/page/2


Offline Lurtz

I'm single. I always thought I'd stop punting if I hooked up with a chick permanently. Now, however, I have my doubts. The thought of just shagging with one bird fills me with dread. It would be like limiting myself to the same meal every night. As much I enjoy a lasagne with coleslaw and a glass of Shiraz, I need to tickle my taste-buds with other flavours: Thai, Indian, French, Brazilian ... you get the picture. So, would punting save my marriage? No, because it stops me considering marriage in the first place. Viva le singledom!


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