Popular media on UKEscorting.com (free site!)

UKPunting is a free, independent and not-for-profit paid sex buyer site.


Author Topic: Comical Punts  (Read 2258 times)

Offline PLeisure

I might have mentioned this before but whilst I were podging one lass many moons ago, her teenage son was throwing stones up at the window shouting "mum, let me in, I'm locked out"

She didn't stop podging so I carried on riding, when we were done I went out the back way, walked round the front to be met on the street by said lass giving a thick ear to her lad, we didn't make eye contact :D

 :D  :cool:  :P Comedy Gold - reads like a scene from "Carry On Podging" 

Offline GBush

I told this story to a British WG who does in call at a shared apartment.  She didn't believe me ............ so I've got no chance with you lot.

I used to pop in to see a Romanian girl in a flat in Brentford; three of them worked there and all were very cute.  The one I had booked was great and could take an anal pounding. So I'm there for an hour, first pop no problem.  Start second round and I'm hammering her and I just can't come. She's had enough and goes to the ensuite. I open her door stark bollack naked and see one of the other girls reading on her bed.  She looks up and I ask her if she'll finish me off with a blowjob for £20.  She says OK and comes into the room. 15 mins later I still couldn't cum. 

Got back to my car and had a parking ticket.................. the blowy cost me £60 in the end
Banning reason: Previously banned (The Real Midas Touch)

The very first time I saw a WG I accidently shot my load up her nose whilst giving her a facial.

She saw the funny side afterwards but was not best pleased when it happened as she muttered "Good aim!" to me sarcastically then ran into the bathroom to try to snort my cum out of her nose.

Back in the early 90's I punted in Bristol & Bath quite a lot using local papers and the small ads section. It was always hit and miss so you had to be sure what you were getting as they always chaged extras
On one occasion I had just had owo and given the young lady a lovely mouthful. She stood up off the bed and picked up a large metal waste bin, the type we had in school in the 70's, she gargled the words "for another £10 I will swallow it" to which I replied "Don't be stupid you will never fit that bin in your mouth"

I was still laughing when I got back in my car I bet she still had the bemused look on her face

Offline GBush

I can't believe I forgot this one.......

I'd seen a Polish girl in Birmingham Jewellry quarter 3 times and I booked her again. It was a mid afternoon punt as she was coming in on the train from a weekend away.

I get there and she says "OMG I have some amazing news" .................... "I'm engaged. My boyfriend proposed to me on the platform as I got on the train this morning"

She then proceeded to fuck my brains out. She was so excited and so horny, it was a great fuck. She did anal cowgirl up on her feet, moaning and groaning. She took a face fucking and as I stood there just about to cover her face with man sauce I just had to laugh.

Downside she said she was moving away and retiring.  Yeah ...... you guessed it, she moved away but 2 months later her profile was back up in her new location.
Banning reason: Previously banned (The Real Midas Touch)

Offline rogercock00

Some great comedy punting moments out there!  :drinks:

Offline PLeisure

GBush, gotta admire her professionalism  :thumbsup:

Offline the_exile

Similar to the one where the young lad was locked out, this time it was the maid at the walk-up. The girl was there when I arrived but no maid, we decided to get started. We were just changing positions when there was a knock on the door and the maid asked rather sheepishly if we could let her in as she was bursting for the toilet! Had a giggle about that.


Latest media on UKEscorting.com (free site!)