Sugar Babies
Shemales

Author Topic: Punting When You Cant Get A Relationship  (Read 3096 times)

BootyAddict

  • Guest
Im a 35 year old guy, I've  been punting for 5 years infrequently. Inbetween that I've had relationships with 30 somethings, generally I've found many I've met had some sort of emotional issues unfortunately. Had some great sex with some pretty hot girls but ultimately failed relationships. Im an average looking guy not much going for me sadly but I have become a really good person. Im looking to really move on and find a half decent girl who is relatively sane and doesn't need to be a supermodel.

I just wanted to hear from anyone in the same position as it's not great. Wank/punt/put up with a damaged lady?

Offline pianodave

They all have emotional issues, it's just a question of how much you are prepared to put up with.

Also, being a "good person" will tend to attract the types who want to feed off your goodness, and take advantage. Maybe try being less good. Women tend to behave better for dickheads, and walk over the nice guys.

As a rule of thumb, the more attractive, the crazier. You may want to try a plainer, saner type.

BootyAddict

  • Guest
They all have emotional issues, it's just a question of how much you are prepared to put up with.

Also, being a "good person" will tend to attract the types who want to feed off your goodness, and take advantage. Maybe try being less good. Women tend to behave better for dickheads, and walk over the nice guys.

As a rule of thumb, the more attractive, the crazier. You may want to try a plainer, saner type.

Thanks mate that's helpful. Well I've had somesome great times with hot crazy checks now time to get real. I do have a high sex drive but the sex life can be more dull as long as everything else is there.

WHBStoke

  • Guest
Quite frankly you've got to work out if the issues that they have, and we all have them, are things that you either don't care about or won't affect your life.

No one is perfect, doesn't mean someone can't be perfect for you.

Until then, punt away!

Hawkwind71

  • Guest
Thanks mate that's helpful. Well I've had somesome great times with hot crazy checks now time to get real. I do have a high sex drive but the sex life can be more dull as long as everything else is there.

Just to play devils advocate. Be careful what you wish for

BootyAddict

  • Guest
Quite frankly you've got to work out if the issues that they have, and we all have them, are things that you either don't care about or won't affect your life.

No one is perfect, doesn't mean someone can't be perfect for you.

Until then, punt away!

I shall play detective.

Offline kenny

Like others have said, anyone who's led a reasonably interesting life is going to have some emotional baggage by their 30s.  If you want a real relationship, then you have to man up, accept her emotional issue and live with it, or better still, sort it out together.  She'll (hopefully) love you for sticking with her. you gotta take the smooth with the rough, mate, cos you can spend your entire life just sifting through Miss "nearly right, but not quite".  Though, in a funny sort of way, I miss being single, and dating/punting without the guilt or fear of getting caught  :D


Offline Cuntminion

It's all fucked mate

I'm similar boat 29 , ugly as fuck, unhealthy

At this point in life just give up mate, punt for the physical, get a cat for your emotional life

As for problems, everyone got em

BootyAddict

  • Guest
This is funny because it true. :D

External Link/Members Only

Hilarious.

Well given one of my dates was a bisexual redhead ex stripper ex coke addict rape victim called Tiffany, well that was fun zone. Im dating an ex when colleague tomorrow who seems a 5 crazy and a 5 hot.

vt

  • Guest

Offline Cuntminion

Hilarious.

Well given one of my dates was a bisexual redhead ex stripper ex coke addict rape victim called Tiffany, well that was fun zone. Im dating an ex when colleague tomorrow who seems a 5 crazy and a 5 hot.

Meh you should give her a chance if you click, half that shit not her fault and ex is the key word

Judeth noteth on pasteth

Everyone deserves a chance


KingAlpha

  • Guest
They all have emotional issues, it's just a question of how much you are prepared to put up with.

Also, being a "good person" will tend to attract the types who want to feed off your goodness, and take advantage. Maybe try being less good. Women tend to behave better for dickheads, and walk over the nice guys.

As a rule of thumb, the more attractive, the crazier. You may want to try a plainer, saner type.

I think that's all true up to a point, but I'm sure plenty of blokes have (unhelpful) emotional issues also. Two of mine being that the sex has tailed right off in plainer, saner relationships, and punting to take up the slack just makes it even harder to get back on the civvie saddle (so to speak). I've spent more time out of long term relationships than in, and for the most part have come to prefer it that way. Probably at 35 I felt more like the OP.

BootyAddict

  • Guest
I did was with her for 9 months but too tough to live with and the fact girls with issues go with lesser blokes, as soon as they lose the issues the don't need the crutch.

Offline pianodave

They go with "lesser" blokes because it gives them control - an ugly guy is likely to put up with a lot of shit from a hot girl, which a hot guy won't put up with.

People grow up assuming they will end up in a happy relationship which satisfies all their needs, with someone with their own interests in mind, but the reality is normally very different - someone using you to their advantage until you are no more use, then discarding you. We do this too of course. Nonetheless, most people cling on to the ideal and end up in crappy relationships and marriages then are disinclined to leave because of kids/finances/plain laziness or fear.

Ask yourself, what can a relationship really add to your life? You can get sex without one (probably more easily), you can get loyalty and affection from a dog, company from friends. I look back on my life and realise the worst times were when I was in relationships, and the best when i was not, but when younger I spent much time single and wishing I had a partner. Only to find one, and wish she would fuck off.

Real happiness never comes from another person, imo.

Offline MancSean

Wtf shouldn't this thread be on mumsnet what's it got to do with punting

Offline Cuntminion

They go with "lesser" blokes because it gives them control - an ugly guy is likely to put up with a lot of shit from a hot girl, which a hot guy won't put up with.

People grow up assuming they will end up in a happy relationship which satisfies all their needs, with someone with their own interests in mind, but the reality is normally very different - someone using you to their advantage until you are no more use, then discarding you. We do this too of course. Nonetheless, most people cling on to the ideal and end up in crappy relationships and marriages then are disinclined to leave because of kids/finances/plain laziness or fear.

Ask yourself, what can a relationship really add to your life? You can get sex without one (probably more easily), you can get loyalty and affection from a dog, company from friends. I look back on my life and realise the worst times were when I was in relationships, and the best when i was not, but when younger I spent much time single and wishing I had a partner. Only to find one, and wish she would fuck off.

Real happiness never comes from another person, imo.

That bit in bold

And to be happy with another you must be able to be happy alone first

Best way , life's hard enough without needing someone to depend on

vw

  • Guest
That bit in bold

And to be happy with another you must be able to be happy alone first

Best way , life's hard enough without needing someone to depend on
There is a psychological myth going around that you have to love yourself before someone else can love you. The real truth is that many people learn to love themselves by first being loved by another.

External Link/Members Only

Offline Cuntminion

There is a psychological myth going around that you have to love yourself before someone else can love you. The real truth is that many people learn to love themselves by first being loved by another.

External Link/Members Only


Well I've been loving myself for years

Daily

But I decided to sub contract it to a pole (no offense polish women, it's a joke your awesome )

I'm typical decadent English lazy fuck who don't want to do his own labour

Offline Cuntminion

Oh my idea of decadence is putting Oreos on pizza

When I was early twenties I used to pipe dream of wife, kids one day but life kicked it out of me



Offline pianodave

There is a psychological myth going around that you have to love yourself before someone else can love you. The real truth is that many people learn to love themselves by first being loved by another.

External Link/Members Only

The problem with relying on someone else for your validation and happiness is they can take it away at any moment. As a result, you are very vulnerable to being treated like shit just to keep them around.

Hawkwind71

  • Guest
Wtf shouldn't this thread be on mumsnet what's it got to do with punting

youre right, but there is a tinge of punting here. I have OH and 2 kids. All now perfectly capable of looking after themselves.

Now I just wanna be able to fuck off for weeks at a time and punt myself into oblivion.

shallow, selfish yes, but I gave all my life and couldn't  give a Fuck now.

Offline LoneWolf2020

truth is sex is about reproduction, women can create one offspring in about 18 months including recovery time from giving birth. A bloke could have dozens of kids born to him in the same month or...if you want to go a step further and want to count each sperm as an offspring we could potentially have billions born to us (medical intervention for the latter) so our sex drive will always be stronger.

Relationships and settling down is totally catered towards women and deep down it goes against a mans instinct to want to do that. I, like a few posters on this thread cant be arsed with all the emotional drama that comes with women so i dont go out looking for a potential partner and i must say they certainly can sense the 'non-desperation' a mile off and that can create opportunities in itself.

i try to advise some friends who are desperate and feel like the are in a 'rush' to just chill out, have fun and see what happens but some people dont want to listen.

Hawkwind71

  • Guest
truth is sex is about reproduction, women can create one offspring in about 18 months including recovery time from giving birth. A bloke could have dozens of kids born to him in the same month or...if you want to go a step further and want to count each sperm as an offspring we could potentially have billions born to us (medical intervention for the latter) so our sex drive will always be stronger.

Relationships and settling down is totally catered towards women and deep down it goes against a mans instinct to want to do that. I, like a few posters on this thread cant be arsed with all the emotional drama that comes with women so i dont go out looking for a potential partner and i must say they certainly can sense the 'non-desperation' a mile off and that can create opportunities in itself.

i try to advise some friends who are desperate and feel like the are in a 'rush' to just chill out, have fun and see what happens but some people dont want to listen.


So true. I rushed in, don't regret the kids but don't want the ever after. But as long as my punter life remains private, secret and intact, I can bear the family crap.

The only problem is I see the real world through my new punter eyes.   Extraordinary.

Offline claretandblue


So true. I rushed in, don't regret the kids but don't want the ever after. But as long as my punter life remains private, secret and intact, I can bear the family crap.

The only problem is I see the real world through my new punter eyes.   Extraordinary.
I relate to seeing things through the punters eyes,once you have looked through there is no turning back!

Offline LoneWolf2020

yep, thats why i dont understand these 'retiring from punting' posts. what a load of bollox. you'll never stop, 'punting has you now'.

Offline claretandblue

yep, thats why i dont understand these 'retiring from punting' posts. what a load of bollox. you'll never stop, 'punting has you now'.
Indeed, if I woke up tomorrow and was single and met the girl of my dreams I reckon I would still be on here and awork planning my next punt!

Hawkwind71

  • Guest
Indeed, if I woke up tomorrow and was single and met the girl of my dreams I reckon I would still be on here and awork planning my next punt!

The girl (s) of my dreams wait in flimsy outfits behind darkened doors where lies the stuff such as dreams are made.

Oh shut up Hawkwind, you're a fuckin' poet now.   :dash:
« Last Edit: September 10, 2015, 10:05:15 pm by Hawkwind71 »

Type_O_Negative

  • Guest
yep, thats why i dont understand these 'retiring from punting' posts. what a load of bollox. you'll never stop, 'punting has you now'.

If i would find a GF i would retire. But i would still be here - in Off-Topic department arguing with chicken commando or london maxxxy  :D

Online hendrix

yep, thats why i dont understand these 'retiring from punting' posts. what a load of bollox. you'll never stop, 'punting has you now'.

I used to think the same, and failed to retire before.. but it all depends on the circumstances. You definitely can stop punting. You need three things to punt, the desire, the funds and the opportunity. If one of those fails you're out.

Offline Watts.E.Dunn

Well bin there got two long term married tee shirts and the nippers and  just finished it with missus number 2 and you know what?.

If the right or as near as dammit right lady came along I'd settle for a relationship again.

Punting is OK for fizzical sexe but its not quite the same thing as a good relationship but I'd have to make sure she was still interested in a bit around once a week or thereabouts as now I'm that much older and prolly no wiser you don't feel the need as you did when younger.

But if the worst come to the worst there's still AW;!.

I reckon one of the best things about a relationship is when you have something in common with your partner that counts for a lot plus the bit of madness called chemistry..

and nothing or no ones perfect, and if you can realise that then your a Man my son;)..

spkmstr48

  • Guest
Is this thread the antonym of the sex with OH one?

 :drinks: :diablo: :lol:

BootyAddict

  • Guest
My concerns came from a wealthy Asian girl I just dated who I thought was my soulmate and best sex I've had. She was a bit of a bitch was like you've got 3 weeks to lose your gut, do this do that. I was like stop feeling me chow mein!

Anyway dated a sweet girl (4 crazy 5 hot)  I know tonight who said you don't mind I'm a bit overweight I had depression. I was like nah its cool. 4 crazy 5 hots where it's at.

Online Thepacifist

I haven't had a relationship for 10 years. I've been single so long now I'd rather stay alone.

Distraction

  • Guest
Best not to overthink these things. Miss Right may turn up tomorrow, she may not. If she still doesn't show, punting is not a bad fallback.

yorkshire123

  • Guest
If Mrs Y ever delivers on her promise to fuck off with someone who cares there is one thing I can guarantee, no more relationships ever, if I can't get it free with women I fancy who can deliver the goods then I will hire some that can until I finally curl up my toes for the last time & head off to the the punting heaven in the sky.

Offline Rich42

youre right, but there is a tinge of punting here. I have OH and 2 kids. All now perfectly capable of looking after themselves.

Now I just wanna be able to fuck off for weeks at a time and punt myself into oblivion.

shallow, selfish yes, but I gave all my life and couldn't  give a Fuck now.

Great post Hawk  :drinks:

Seahorse

  • Guest
Never married, and "kind of looking for a relationship" man giving his view here.

But in my 40's, I'm not quite what I was in my late 20s when I had still never asked a woman out ... they asked me (seriously!!).  Now, all that's on the shelf are bitter divorcees or women who, like me, didn't marry because they are a little odd.  And to boot, I'm bald, overweight and have a recurring skin problem,

I can put hours and hours and 30 quid a month into a decent online dating service, possibly getting one date a month.  The date generally works out at between 50 and 100 (sometimes a second date would be about half that) and on the second, if there is one, you usually get the "well, you know I said I was separated?  Well, I'm THINKING of leaving him ..."  And no guarantee of anything else

OR ... I can pop on here, get some recommendations, choose a woman who's way out of my league on civvy street, who will suck me dry, fuck me senseless, and do her damnedest to repeat that in an hour, with the sole intention of getting me back into her bedroom as soon as possible!

Sometimes, it's not a difficult decision
« Last Edit: September 11, 2015, 06:39:50 am by Seahorse »

spkmstr48

  • Guest
Never married, and "kind of looking for a relationship" man giving his view here.

But in my 40's, I'm not quite what I was in my late 20s when I had still never asked a woman out ... they asked me (seriously!!).  Now, all that's on the shelf are bitter divorcees or women who, like me, didn't marry because they are a little odd.  And to boot, I'm bald, overweight and have a recurring skin problem,

I can put hours and hours and 30 quid a month into a decent online dating service, possibly getting one date a month.  The date generally works out at between 50 and 100 (sometimes a second date would be about half that) and on the second, if there is one, you usually get the "well, you know I said I was separated?  Well, I'm THINKING of leaving him ..."  And no guarantee of anything else

OR ... I can pop on here, get some recommendations, choose a woman who's way out of my league on civvy street, who will suck me dry, fuck me senseless, and do her damnedest to repeat that in an hour, with the sole intention of getting me back into her bedroom as soon as possible!

Sometimes, it's not a difficult decision

No brainer really  :)

 :drinks: :diablo: :lol:


Swansea lad

  • Guest
Well bin there got two long term married tee shirts and the nippers and  just finished it with missus number 2 and you know what?.

If the right or as near as dammit right lady came along I'd settle for a relationship again.

Punting is OK for fizzical sexe but its not quite the same thing as a good relationship but I'd have to make sure she was still interested in a bit around once a week or thereabouts as now I'm that much older and prolly no wiser you don't feel the need as you did when younger.

But if the worst come to the worst there's still AW;!.

I reckon one of the best things about a relationship is when you have something in common with your partner that counts for a lot plus the bit of madness called chemistry..

and nothing or no ones perfect, and if you can realise that then your a Man my son;)..

I agree with you, wg's have a purpose but cant replace a relationship.

Hawkwind71

  • Guest
I agree with you, wg's have a purpose but cant replace a relationship.

l won't argue, been there, done that. Very basic human need in our human brains. Just remember it is built on a mammalian brain and the inner demon will out. And reptilian brain at its core, good luck fighting that. I gave up a few years back.

Offline pianodave

My concerns came from a wealthy Asian girl I just dated who I thought was my soulmate and best sex I've had. She was a bit of a bitch was like you've got 3 weeks to lose your gut, do this do that. I was like stop feeling me chow mein!

Anyway dated a sweet girl (4 crazy 5 hot)  I know tonight who said you don't mind I'm a bit overweight I had depression. I was like nah its cool. 4 crazy 5 hots where it's at.


The depression should worry you more than the weight.

Online akauya

With a few exceptions, I think we, as flawed humans, will always want what we don't have.  Single men may want to be in a relationship and married/attached men may want to be single again. I read somewhere that levels of dopamine increase in our brains when we attain something that we coveted for ages. It's also one of the reasons product advertising works well. They make us "want" the items advertised so when we get them we feel great about it.

I can relate to this because one thing that I miss is the chase. I used the internet and dating sites successfully for finding lovers. I loved the fact that you can seduce women with words alone. I find that a challenge and when it works it's fucking awesome. Yes, it's a lot of work and it takes time - that's why I punt in between but seducing a civvie is a huge ego boost so if I were single I would go from one relationship to another. I don't think I would settle long term anymore.

Hawkwind71

  • Guest
With a few exceptions, I think we, as flawed humans, will always want what we don't have.  Single men may want to be in a relationship and married/attached men may want to be single again. I read somewhere that levels of dopamine increase in our brains when we attain something that we coveted for ages. It's also one of the reasons product advertising works well. They make us "want" the items advertised so when we get them we feel great about it.

I can relate to this because one thing that I miss is the chase. I used the internet and dating sites successfully for finding lovers. I loved the fact that you can seduce women with words alone. I find that a challenge and when it works it's fucking awesome. Yes, it's a lot of work and it takes time - that's why I punt in between but seducing a civvie is a huge ego boost so if I were single I would go from one relationship to another. I don't think I would settle long term anymore.

The chase. Yes that goes to the root of the male brain. All started with the antelope and the spear on the savannah then home to pots brewing and six naked asses all plump and ready. Sorry, read too many National Geographics before I was old enough to buy my first playboy magazine.

BootyAddict

  • Guest

vw

  • Guest
The chase. Yes that goes to the root of the male brain.
Maybe we need to go hunting more and would save a fortune !

I suspect infidelity increased in this country as hunting got unfashionable/banned !

Aspen

  • Guest
Im looking to really move on and find a half decent girl who is relatively sane

I've spent most of my life doing that, and don't think they actually exist. Only in the imagination.

Offline purple_t

It's all fucked mate

I'm similar boat 29 , ugly as fuck, unhealthy

At this point in life just give up mate, punt for the physical, get a cat for your emotional life

As for problems, everyone got em

This, but I would advise getting a dog instead of a cat

BootyAddict

  • Guest

Now I just wanna be able to fuck off for weeks at a time and punt myself into oblivion.

shallow, selfish yes, but I gave all my life and couldn't  give a Fuck now.

That would make a great film.